#the scope of it is just small enough.... like a burr. in my brain.

[mod2amaryllis]

who else haunted by an apology you never got the chance to make???? 🤪🤪🤪

#this isn't too serious this is about my college roommate #i was awful and i think about it all the time and wish i could send her a pizza and say any resentment is justified i'm so sorry #but i don't keep track of people. i don't know her last name i don't know how to contact her or if she'd even want that #i just think about it constantly for some fucking reason #if you're out there....man i'm sorry i didn't try harder to be friends i was 19 and at my absolute worst #I'm sorry about the illegal rat cage i never cleaned #literally i wish i could pay you reparations you wouldn't have to say a word to me just receive 'you didn't deserve that' + 50 usd #i think part of why this particular memory is so persistent- and has been for years like it constantly comes up when i'm tired- #is because the stakes are relatively low #like i was just a shit. i was just annoying and unkind. and then we both moved on and i'm better now and i assume she's ok. #the scope of it is just small enough.... like a burr. in my brain. #I'm hoping if i throw this into the ether i won't think about it as much lol #m2a