#thats also why its so decorated. i sent it to my friend as a bday gift xD | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

oswednesday · 5 years

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omg so a festive holiday venting so growing up my mom would do NOTHING for valentines day to the point where it was a struggle to get those cheap cards at a drug store so thats why they kinda represent something to me, she would shit on it constantly and call me names for even liking like calling a child under 12 stupid and desperate and Worse things in a drug store at night the day before vday cause she just couldnt be bothered is my strongest memory of that time

and like she wouldnt give me money for like the three dollars or w/e flower exchange at the high school i went to and since i wasnt sending any i also wasnt getting any making me one of like three sd fghj students who didnt get a single thing like that on vday which, tbh, should have been a screaming indication of the dysfunction of my friend group not that i expected to get anything they all just made it Very Clear that they were like lol you didnt get anything thats so funny while wanting me to be like Wow Cool You Got Each Other Stuff like validate them like it was the coolest thing i ever heard

anyway im out of that school and my brothers were just both old enough where little cards were less Life Or Death when my mom started to get us those little cards like all of the sudden? and then she started to get like bigger Physical cards and little chocolate with it, and she keeps like escalading it every year now, she even sent stuff when she totally didnt send or even call me on my bday when i was away at college,,

and so like instead of getting me and my brother stuff like that reliably for our birthdays she’s now like split that off and started to on vday and its so obviously manipulative and over compenstating like this year she got my brother a heart shaped balloon after using his deflating birthday balloon as a decoration and she got both of us like, a really nice card (like a five dollar one) after not getting us a card for our birthdays, and my brothers still like Young enough to exchange in class but she didnt get him anything to do that but she did get both of us like solo exchange candy, all while acting like if she did any of this attention on our bdays she’d be in debters prison just dsfghj its just super inappropriate

in the card i got is like i love you so much card text and under it she wrote you know its true! like, um holy shit

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hella-free-space · 7 years

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Anything under 5 gallons is too small for a betta, i know 2.5 is the *minimum minimum* but it is the same as putting your betta to a bucket and calling it a day. They need space. Plus a "tank" that small can't hold a stable cycle and is more difficult to keep as, Let's say a proper 10 g tank

aight so...i wrote this big long thing (i’m a really wordy person, and i ramble, so bare with me) when this ask got sent like a month and a half ago. i typed it up on my phone, but mobile tumblr does this thing where if you take more than x minutes to write a reply, it doesnt let you save what you’ve written as a draft and it default posts to your main. and then it just doesnt post ever...so now i’m here, on desktop, to write you this long-overdue reply, Anon.this ask came shortly after a post/comment/reblog on tank size recommendation, so i kind of want assume that this same person who was discussing with me sent this ask, but i’m not going to assume but this person asked on anon... I’m currently writing a long-winded caresheet about bettas (which i plan to post for peer-review tomorrow), and so far i’ve written this about Tank Size:******“2.5gallons:The absolute minimum, I do not recommend keeping a betta in anything less thanthis because even in a cycled 2.5, keeping a *stable* cycle is very difficult,and requires more frequent water changes (1-2x per week at least). In a tank this small, you’ll mostlikely need to buy an adjustable heater as well, since the smallest (trustworthy)heaters on the market are 7-7.5 watts, and depending on where you live or howhot/cold you keep your house/room, the heat will fluctuate too often, or be toohot or too cold since the volume of water is quite small. A 2.5 gallon bettatank is doable.5 gallons:A great median for those who want to give their bettas a wonderful environment,but may be cramped on space, move around often, or whose living arrangementshave aquarium-related restrictions. A cycled 5 gallon tank with a bettagenerally requires a water change 1x a week at least. A 5 gallon tank also keeps a more stable cycle than a 2.5 gallon, and over-heating is less of an issue/concern. I still recommend anadjustable heater (I’ll always recommend an adjustable heater), though, as I’vefound that even with an appropriately-sized preset heater/non-adjustableheater, the temperature fluctuates too often and by too much. A 5 gallon is aperfectly good choice!10+ gallons:A palace! Your new betta would love to have a 10+ gallon tank! They’ll swimover every inch of it, I promise its not too big :) A fantastic choice for thosethat have the space and can afford to set up a 10 gallon or larger with all thebells and whistles (more décor, larger filter, stronger heater, etc. than the smaller tanks). Your fish will thank you and brag to all their fish friends that they ended up with some pretty sweet digs.note: If you feel you can’t give your betta a 10+ gallon tank, and you can onlyafford a 2.5 or 5 gallon setup (or something inbetween), that DOES NOT mean I think you’re a bad fish parent ❤ as long as you can provide the basicnecessities your fish requires and keep on top of water quality, and then do *what* youcan, *when* you can, youre doing it right :) (Never stop improving!! never stop learning!!) Maybe it’ll be a few months before you can buy your fish thatnew hide or a few extra plants, or maybe you’ll have to wait til xmas or yourbday to be able to afford a larger tank if that’s what you want, and that’sokay. As long as you do the best within your means (provided your animal’sbasic needs are met), that’s all your fish would ask of you ❤”******note: i address properly decorating/filtering/heating/etc in the rest of the care sheet. this is literally JUST the section on tank size.1. addressing that “2.5 gallons is the *minimum minimum*” statement anon made:its just *the minimum*...when you’re saying how small is too small and how big is too big without any defining *objective* factors, then it becomes subjective and opinionated. I addressed the cycling issue above in what I wrote for the care sheet. imo a 2.5 gallon is doable. is it amazin, perfect, the best you can give your betta? no...but neither is a 5 gallon .-. so, if your standard of minimum is based upon your opinion of what looks too cramped, then thats okay, and good on you for promoting a 5 gallon as a minimum tank. and i’m not saying that sarcastically, either, i really do wish i could promote 5 gallons as the minimum tank size, but when i’m explaining fish care to someone in the middle of the store, i have to give them objective facts (like the ones listed above under the 2.5 gallon section)To someone who thinks that .5 gallon bowl at petsmart is okay, who is standing in the aisle with betta in hand, me going up to them and telling them 5 gallons is the minimum just cuz its bigger isn’t going to change their mind 90% of the time. with a 2.5 its still on the small side, but at least i can give them objective facts. and i DO say “but if you get a 5.5 gallon its 2$ more for 2x the size, and a 10 gallon is 4x the size for that same 2$ more! and it’ll be easier to heat, cycle, and you’ll have to do less wc on it :) plus more room for decor!! decorating a tank is almost as fun as picking out your new fish!! :DD” so dont get me wrong there, please. but so many people equate bigger tank with more work, suggesting a “proper 10 gallon tank” to someone standing in that checkout line with their fish, some cheap food, a bowl, and a plastic plant? if they took my advice i’d buy a friggin lottery ticket. (I actually think this is what the post was about originally, that one i was having the discussion on before this ask arrived...if i find it, i’ll give a link to it)2. addresing the “it is the same as putting your betta to a bucket and calling it a day.” statement:they make 5 gallon buckets so i see no problems there [somewhat sarcastic, somewhat serious tone]. Just because a tank isn’t glass or acrylic doesn’t mean you cant keep a fish in it imo. Plenty of people use tub-tanks so i dont see why a bucket would be so bad so long as it meets those minimum requirements (2.5+, 76-82, filtered, good food, appropriate decor, lighting a must since the bucket probably isnt see-through and fish shouldnt live in complete and total darkness imo) and the material doesnt leach chemicals, I dont really see a problem? i mean, most buckets are taller than they are wide, but so are some glass/acrylic tanks (fluval spec 3)...i get what you’re trying to say here (i think), though: just throwing a fish in some water and calling it good ain’t good, aint gonna cut it. just like you dont want to suggest 2.5 as the “minimum minimum” because you believe it is inadequate for a betta.3. adressing the “They need space. Plus a "tank" that small can't hold a stable cycle and is more difficult to keep as, Let's say a proper 10 g tank” statement:pretty much agree with this part. smaller tanks dont hold cycles as easily as larger tanks, just the way it is (this does NOT tank into account overstocking, uncycled/cycling tanks, or chemical/parameter spikes). I agree completely that a 10 gallon tank will hold a much more stable cycle than a 2.5 or 5 gallon will. especially if the stock is the same (i.e. one betta). I also agree that bettas need space, and would like to add that longer tanks > taller tanks, since bettas (and most other fish) swim side-to-side and not up and down. a larger tank (again, same stock) will also require less wc/maintenance than a smaller tank. but, imma reiterate, thats hard to explain to the betta+bowl person you see walkin around at your local lfs/lps/chain store...in most people’s mind larger = more work, even tho WE (and hopefully all of fishblr/bettablr) know that that’s not true, even if we do our best to explain that to the general/uneducated/betta-ignorant populace.In the end, i think maybe you (anon) and me have different approaches to the same goal. we both want to improve quality of life for bettas, debunk myths about them, educate people about them, make sure people do right by their pets.i just want to change everyone’s mind first, get more people up to speed and get them out of Bowls-Are-Okay-For-Fish-Land, steer them away from those awful glass prisons and gimmicky tanks and THEN talk about how they can really spoil their pet, how to improve as a Pet ParentTM and give their pet The BestTM. let the water heat up really slowly so to speak (like hot tub, or a lobster pot), since i think I’ll be able to change more minds that way: slowly, steadily...thats what changed my mind, and from personal experience this is what changes the minds of others more easily.If anyone has anything to add, rebutt, comment, reply, etc. please feel free to #told yall i was long-winded and rambly #still dont know how to add hashtags to these dang replies ;-; #fishblr #bettablr #Ronireplies

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