#that bergen accent is my villain origin story

[teejaysnow]

It’s 04:00, I’m on the nightbus back to Stockholm (where I will arrive at around 06:10) - and no, I don’t regret all of my life choices. Yet.

My plan for today was to get a hot chocolate at Kaffebrenneriet, do some shopping at Outland and Platekompaniet, and then head over to Dramatikkens hus to watch six scriptwriters from Den Norske Filmskolen “revive the art of theatre”.

Well, at least I got my chocolate - but the shopping spree at Outland was cut short because of a fire alarm, and I didn’t find anything I wanted at Platekompaniet. So the scriptwriters better be reviving the hell outta that theatre, thanks.

First off, I did find Dramatikkens hus after circling the place only once. (Without google maps, I’d probably still be looking for it - they don’t really advertise their existence, do they?) Also, it’s definitely not bigger on the inside - which was good since I’d forgotten to bring my glasses and is pretty much blind as a bat without them. Usually not a problem, my sonar system is pretty good - but for theatre performances I prefer to rely on my glasses, thanks.

So, we all got our hands stamped (well, when I say stamped…), a small program (well, when I say program…), and a lottery ticket - which I suspect was a scam (I mean, as someone with quite a few memories she’d like to forget, I had high hopes for that lottery prize) and were then set free to find a seat. I found a nice one by the wall and curled up to enjoy the show(s).

Anyway - from here on, there be spoilers:

The first play was the lottery one. As I said, I had high hopes for my I19 ticket, but… yeah, I’m pretty sure it was rigged… 😏

Anyway, it was a pretty interesting play. The lottery winner was adamant that she regretted nothing despite the host dragging up things like making her younger sister drink her own urine (thanks for that mental image). It wasn’t until the host talked about how she’d sexually abused someone that the winner started to get uncomfortable and denying it had ever happened. She would never. She wasn’t that kind of person. And anyway, he was a guy, guys wanted sex. Also, guys wanted her. Finally she accepted that she might have been guilty of abuse and asked to get her memory removed. After some further thought, she instead wanted the guy’s memory to be removed. And after even more thought she decided that they both should keep their memories, thus turning down the prize, because it would be weird no matter whose memory got removed.

There were no curtain calls between the sets (well, there was no curtain either, so 🤷🏻‍♀️), only some nifty stagehands moving and removing the few props each scene had. So for Bruduljen, they produced a table and two chairs.

I was looking forward to this one. I read and really liked Camilla’s photobook, which felt very stream of consciousness-y, so I was interested to see if she’d also use that style for script writing. (The answer was no, but I still liked the play a lot.) A teacher and the mother of a girl that had assaulted her were working on a report on what had happened. The mother was trying to soften the language - was it really an assault, wasn’t it more of an argument that got out of hand? Did she really punch you, wasn’t it more of a slap? Talking about how she has a picture of her five year old daughter with her face full of ice cream taped to the refrigerator, wondering what happened to that sweet girl who now colour her hair and have a… well, rather colourful language to match? The mother and the teacher got into a shouting match, then there was an actual fight where the teacher’s ptsd from the assault kicked in and she hid under the table, and then there was a sweet (and very funny) bit where the mother tried to coax the teacher out from under there. And then they went back to work on the report.

Stagehands in to exchange the table and chairs for a sofa with a… well, body, I guess? Enter my favourite play of the night.

The description of this one gave me a bit of Who’s Afraid of Virginia Wolf vibes beforehand. Afterwards? Yeah, I’m still sticking with old Virginia here. It’s really funny with some pretty loud arguments in between. As well as a whole cooked turkey thrown on the floor. Twice. I guess nothing says Christmas like a good family argument? Even if one third of the family is sitting dead on the sofa…

The play began with mum talking to her (very dead) hubby and offering him whisky. Which he - surprisingly enough - didn’t drink. She blamed it on it being cheap whisky - me, I’m pretty sure he wouldn’t have drank it even if it had been Talisker. Enter daughter, who complains about the smell. I wonder why 🤔 She also complains about rats. I wonder why 🤔 Exit mum to the kitchen to fetch the turkey - leading to my favourite joke of the night (that didn’t get a laugh - I wonder why?? 😠) where the daughter pours a glass of whisky, holds it out to her dad and with an absolutely perfect delivery says “Whisky?”. Anyway, enter the turkey, daughter throws it to the ground while yelling at her mother in english, picks it up, hands it to her mum, and apologises - only for her mother to throw it to the ground while yelling back, also in english. Then the doorbell goes off and her mum asks if the daughter had invited anyone. Which she had. People from the funeral parlour. Her mum still doesn’t want to let go of her dead husband, so the daughter agrees not to let them in and that they can all just sit and wait for death and then get buried together. Always look on the bright side of death, I guess.

Okay, so out with the sofa, in with… nothing? Except for two actors, that is. So this was basically my reason for going to Oslo. Well, this and Kaffebrenneriet’s hot chocolate.

Now, let’s start with the fact that the Bergen accent is not my friend, so… the struggle was real. I most definitely didn’t get all of the dialogue.

The play was about a seventeen year old drama student wanting to do a Chekhov play topless (but I’d say she definitely gave off more Shakespeare’s Ophelia vibes with the whole waif-y dancing and singing). Anyway, she baited the drama teacher about it and how she felt that Nina would definitely have her boobs out. The drama teacher didn’t fully agree, trying to argue that it was a school play and the sixteen year old boys watching would just see her boobs. The student argued that it would be Nina’s boobs they saw, not hers. (I think both me and the drama teacher doubted that the boys would make that distinction) The student kept provoking the teacher, calling him out about having liked to see her boobs. The teacher altered between confessing that he had and saying that he hadn’t and that he was being her teacher. It all finished with her dancing off the stage while humming an eerie melody, apparently off to drown herself in the river (as I said - Ophelia vibes) Between this and Kunsten er død, I have a feeling Tarjei is in his “exploring what art really is” era.

Anyway - no stagehands this time since we were getting another props free play.

This one was the age old story of boy leaving a party early because ex is there with her new beau, ex comes after him and calls him out on it, boy admits to it. Although a bit more complicated. (Don’t get me wrong, I did like this one.) So, boy and girl used to be a couple when they were younger. At seventeen, girl got pregnant. Girl then lost the baby, which led to the break up - apparently without the two of them really talking about it. Until now. Let’s just say there were some left over feelings still around and they kept skipping around the stage, getting closer and closer to each other. Until they got very close. And then her phone rang and it all crumbled into pieces. Boy is about to walk away, girl is waiting for her boyfriend to drive her home - and then we get a fifteen minute flash forward indicating that there will be an accident. Boy imagines asking (what we now know is future dead) girl to tell their unborn baby that he loves her. Sad now. (Also, all the actors were great, but I think these two were my favourites.)

And now the stagehands are back for the final play. Hooray! Enter a park bench and one actor - who is taking a magazine test on sexuality. S&M. Whips. Dogs. (I might have misheard that last one. At least I hope I did.). This is when actor number two arrives and starts going on about Will Smith and Chris Rock. (Both me and actor number one are of the opinion that it’s been years, just get over it.) Actor two talks about having sex with multiple people - which actor one quickly labels “poly” and - after a bit of explaining - actor two happily accepts. They continue to talk about the sexuality test and actor one goes full gossip girl and spills about how his girlfriend and a male friend got the same high score on the sadist category. They then do a bit of fuckboy sniggering until actor two shoves actor one hard enough for him to kick over his soda bottle. And that soda had cost him thirty crowns, thank you very much. So actor one tries to fight actor two over it. Very unsuccessfully. So actor one ends up lying on the ground moaning while actor two returns to the bench and starts up on the whole Will and Chris thing again. Actor one yells at him to stop (otherwise I’d have probably done it 😒), and actor two realises that actor one laying on the ground whimpering meant he’s masochistic - which is the perfect pairing for his sadist girlfriend. And then they all lived happily ever after.

The whole thing took about 90 minutes - which meant I had eons of time to catch my bus. I even had time to meditate a bit over the Opera House by night.

And now, here I am on a bus back to Stockholm, bum complaining about the uncomfortable seat, head complaining about the lack of sleep, stomach complaining about not enough food, and bladder complaining about having had too much to drink. And I’m still not regretting any of my life choices. Today’s been fun!

#tarjei #filmforfattere gjenoppliver teaterkunsten #that bergen accent is my villain origin story

[papermoonloveslucy]

BOB HOPE’S WORLD OF COMEDY

October 30, 1976

Produced and Directed by Jack Haley Jr.

Written by: Charles Lee with Gig Henry, Jeffrey Barron, Katherine Green, and Jack Haley Jr.

Bob Hope (Himself, Host) was born Lesley Townes Hope in England in 1903. During his extensive career in virtually all forms of media he received five honorary Academy Awards. In 1945 Desi Arnaz was the orchestra leader on Bob Hope’s radio show. Ball and Hope did four films together. He appeared as himself on the season 6 opener of “I Love Lucy.” He did a brief cameo in a 1964 episode of “The Lucy Show.”  When Lucille Ball moved to NBC in 1980, Hope appeared on her welcome special. He died in 2003 at age 100.

Lucille Ball (Herself) was born on August 6, 1911 in Jamestown, New York. She began her screen career in 1933 and was known in Hollywood as ‘Queen of the B’s’ due to her many appearances in ‘B’ movies. With Richard Denning, she starred in a radio program titled “My Favorite Husband” which eventually led to the creation of “I Love Lucy,” a television situation comedy in which she co-starred with her real-life husband, Latin bandleader Desi Arnaz. The program was phenomenally successful, allowing the couple to purchase what was once RKO Studios, re-naming it Desilu. When the show ended in 1960 (in an hour-long format known as “The Lucy-Desi Comedy Hour”) so did Lucy and Desi’s marriage. In 1962, hoping to keep Desilu financially solvent, Lucy returned to the sitcom format with “The Lucy Show,” which lasted six seasons. She followed that with a similar sitcom “Here’s Lucy” co-starring with her real-life children, Lucie and Desi Jr., as well as Gale Gordon, who had joined the cast of “The Lucy Show” during season two. Before her death in April 1989, Lucy made one more attempt at a sitcom with “Life With Lucy,” also with Gordon, which was not a success and was canceled after just 13 episodes.

Neil Simon (Himself) is a playwright and screenwriter responsible for more than 30 plays, most of which were seen on Broadway and adapted into films.  At the time, one of his most enduring plays The Odd Couple was being done on television. In 1983 became the only living playwright to have a New York theatre named in his honor. In 1960, when it was still called the Alvin Theatre, Lucille Ball appeared there in the musical Wildcat.

Don Rickles (Himself) worked as a stand-up comic in nightclubs for nearly 20 years before making his film debut in 1958. Rickles was known as an insult comic and became a staple of Hollywood roasts. In “Lucy the Fight Manager” (TLS S5;E20) he made his first and last acting appearance with Lucille Ball, but would be seen with her on variety shows and specials through 1988. Rickles was the voice of Mr. Potato Head in the animated Toy Story franchise. He died in April 2017 at age 90.

Norman Lear (Himself) is a television writer and producer responsible for such hits as “All in the Family,” “Maude,” “One Day at a Time,” “The Jeffersons,” and many others. He received three Emmy Awards for his work on “All in the Family.”  

Caroll Spinney (Big Bird) started playing Big Bird on “Sesame Street” in 1969. In 2000, Big Bird was named a Living Legend by the United States Library of Congress. Created by Jim Henson, Big Bird is one of two Muppets to have a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. Spinney has been honored with four Daytime Emmy Awards for his portrayals on the series and two Grammy Awards for his related recordings. Two recordings of Spinney's voice have earned Gold Record status.

As with many Bob Hope specials, the show is sponsored by Texaco.

Bob Hope's opening monologue talks mainly about the Presidential Election, which would take place in two weeks. Incumbent president Gerald Ford ran against Jimmy Carter. He also touches on the World Series, the Swine Flu epidemic, Zsa Zsa Gabor's multiple marriages, and the CB radio craze.

Bob's first guest is Big Bird from “Sesame Street” (Caroll Spinney). Big Bird does an ad-lib impersonation of Jack Benny that makes Hope laugh. This kicks off a montage of clips about animals.

A pet shop staffed by Bob Newhart 

Jackie Gleason playing golf with Mildred, a chimp in How To Commit Marriage (1969)

Roy Rogers and Trigger “the wonder horse”

Julie London with puppies who prove not to be housebroken

Dan Rowan with a horse and Dick Martin with a camel 

Hope with his dog in a vet's waiting room and Betty Grable there with a race horse

Hope and Greer Garson in divorce court fighting over their dog, Mr. Smith

Lassie as the subject of “This is Your Life” in a spoof from “The Bob Hope Show”

Next Hope introduces a montage of clips featuring international stars.  

Maurice Chevalier (France)

Eva Gabor (Hungary)

Zsa Zsa Gabor (Hungary) with Angie Dickinson

Ingrid Bergman (Sweden)

Anita Ekberg (Sweden) with William Holden and Robert Strauss

Olivia Newton John (Australia)

Rex Harrison (England) and Lilli Palmer (Poland) with Janis Paige

David Niven (England) with Marilyn Maxwell

After a Texaco commercial, Bob introduces Lucy Ricardo aka Lucy Carmichael aka “the bionic woman of comedy” - Lucille Ball. 

Lucy reminisces with Bob, which leads to a black and white clip of a sketch from “The Bob Hope Show” (September 24, 1962). In it, Lucy plays a District Attorney and Bob a gangster named Bugsy Hope.

Back on stage, Bob asks Lucy the secret to her show's endearing success. She says that it has to do with the realatable domestic situations created by the writers. Bob add that the physical comedy gives her comedy world-wide appeal. Lucy says that as of last count her shows were seen in 79 countries. Lucy says she's heard herself dubbed in Japanese, and that in South America it is HER who as the accent. Asked about being a legend, Lucy says it is “kind of like an obituary” but she's very grateful.

After another Texaco break, Bob talks about slapstick and introduces a montage of clips.

Ernie Kovacs trying to sell his house during an earthquake

Bob as Bobby Riggs playing against Billie Jean King (Ann-Margret)

Hope and Douglas Fairbanks Jr. as astronauts walking in space

Jack Benny using hidden cameras in his home to avoid paying Hope a guest-star fee

The second hour of the special kicks off with Hope introducing playwright Neil Simon. They talk about writing, the difference between drama and comedy, and ethnic humor, which is the cue for the next montage of clips about vaudeville.

Hope and Crosby do a routine

Hope, Crosby, Steve Allen, and Jack Paar are child actors competing for the same job

Danny Thomas as a candy seller interrupting Hope's act by stealing all his punchlines

Donald O'Connor as Wingo the Magnificent, a knife thrower, with Hope as Courageous Targo, his human target

Hope introduces Don Rickles, who promotes his new show “CPO Sharkey” which he compares to Phil Silvers in “Sergeant Bilko.”  Hope says he's been the victim of insult comedy, which begins a montage of clips where Bob is insulted by:

Milton Berle

Tony Randall

Redd Foxx

Glenn Campbell

Gina Lollobridgida

Jerry Colonna

Dorothy Lamour

Tony Bennett

Fred MacMurray

Joan Crawford

George Sanders

Frank Sinatra

Troy Donahue

Hedda Hopper

John Wayne

Dyan Cannon

Debbie Reynolds (with Jack Benny)

Juliet Prowse

Bob Hope introduces Norman Lear, who mentions he has no shows on NBC. They talk about “Mary Hartman Mary Hartman,” the 'Family Hour,' his flops like “Hot L Baltimore,” and Archie Bunker. The next batch of clips is about satire.  

Johnny Carson as a playboy movie star Rock Carson appearing on a talk show 

Hope, Burt Reynolds and Dyan Canon spoof the TV series “Paper Moon”  

A sketch called “Bananaz” (“Bonanza”) starring Bing Crosby, Bob Hope, and Juliet Prowse

A “Batman” spoof starring Martha Rae as Bat Girl and Bob Hope as the villain Lobsterman

Medical dramas are poked fun at by Hope, Barbara Eden, and Lee Marvin

After a commercial, the montages are about dancing. Some of Hope's choreographed clips: 

Dancing with Raquel Welch

Doing Eddie Foy's famous sand dance

Soft shoe with Pearl Bailey

A trio with Jeanne Crain and Betty Hutton

A challenge dance with George Burns

Rare footage of Dean Martin dancing alongside Hope

Polly Bergen, Jimmy Durante and Hope dance as babies while on their knees (above photo)

A partner dance with Ginger Rogers

Hoofing with Hope and Jimmy Cagney

Modern dance with Ann-Margret

Hat and cane steps with Sammy Davis Jr.

Hope wraps up the special with a look at some of the comedians of the past.  

Budd Abbott and Lou Costello (above photo)

Fred Allen

Gracie Allen

Cliff Arquette aka Charlie Weaver

Mischa Auer

Robert Benchley

Jack Benny

Willy Best

Fanny Brice, the original 'Funny Girl'

Joe E. Brown

Billy Burke

Eddie Cantor

Jack Carson

Charles Correll, Amos of “Amos 'n' Andy”

Wally Cox

Joan Davis

Marie Dressler

Leon Errol

W.C. Fields

Billy Gilbert, the greatest sneeze in show business

Ted Healy and the Three Stooges

Hugh Herbert

Judy Holliday

Edward Everett Horton

Buster Keaton

Edgar 'Slow Burn' Kennedy

Ernie Kovacs

Burt Lahr

Stan Laurel and Oliver Hardy

Harold Lloyd

Carol Lombard

Harpo and Chico Marx

Donald Meek

Victor Moore

Jack Norton, the perennial drunk

Franklin Pangborn

Joe Penner

Will Rodgers

Irene Ryan, Granny of “The Beverly Hillbillies”

Charlie Ruggles

S.Z. 'Cuddles' Sakall

Max Sennett, king of the Keystone Cops

Arthur Treacher

Burt Wheeler and Robert Wolsey

Ed Wynn

This Day in Lucy History – October 29th

“The Diet” (ILL S1;E3) – October 29, 1951

"Visitor from Italy" (ILL S6;E5) – October 29, 1956

"Lucy Buys a Sheep" (TLS S1;E5) – October 29, 1961

"Lucy and Andy Griffith" (HL S6;E8) – October 29, 1973

#Bob Hope's World of Comedy #Bob Hope #Lucille Ball #Neil Simon #Norman Lear #BIg Bird #Caroll Spinney #1976 #TV #NBC #Jack Haley Jr. #Don Rickles #Texaco