#talking to trans women and nonbinary folk and intersex people taught me so much about the idea that my oppression isn't entirely unique...

[uncanny-tranny]

Comparing oppression can sometimes give you insight as to what other groups of people go through. It teaches you what you have in common with people seemingly different than you are, and teaches you how you are different and how you can ally yourself better with other peoples.

However, if your goal is to prove you suffer the most between you and another person, you'll likely find that there is no conversation, just an endless barrage of back-and-forth to prove which of you deserves to be listened to.

The reality is that you don't have to be in the most pain in order to be listened to. So often, we are inundated with this idea that the person suffering the most is the only one who ought to be listened to, and it sends the message of "holy shit, I guess I don't matter. I guess I deserve to suffer if others are going through worse," and that's just unreasonable and unfair. Who has it worse is entirely contextual and changing, and sometimes it is subjective - as in, something that is earth-breaking for you is an average tuesday evening for the guy next to you.

Kill the cop in your head that says your voice will only matter if you prove yourself. Listen to other marginalized people and know it isn't a competition to see who can prove themselves most worthy of tine and energy. Our resources can (and should) be multifaceted and able to help a variety of peoples.

#intersectionality #talking to trans women and nonbinary folk and intersex people taught me so much about the idea that my oppression isn't entirely unique... #...and that taught me that i must have more interests in my heart... #...and it showed me that i have a broad community even if i didn't always feel it #that's one example #i understand why some people do that but i just can't help but wonder #and in spaces where it's expected that you prove yourself battle royal style i always notice that... nothing really gets accomplished... #...and that isn't always a bad thing! communities don't have to do tangible things in order to be important... #...but i just notice that people tend to be very defensive because they have to be and they express that they feel unheard... #it's a complicated and nuanced topic and i definitely am no spokesman... #...i'm commenting on a *general* trend i have seen in some spaces that isn't universally shared