#sorry i dont see my therapist for another week so tumblr gets the brundt of my inner turmoil

[intergalactic-chameleon]

still thinking about me crying while meeting with my teacher yesterday about my project… god it is so embarrassing when ur hating urself right in front of another person and theyre not like a super close friend or anything. and i dont think she was expecting me to be that upset too so that def made it more awkward for me if not also her. i really tried to keep super self deprecating comments to myself but… still. felt bad!

ik i shouldnt be embarrassed for having strong feelings that i couldnt hold back but man… i was so vulnerable yesterday and i really didnt want to have to be. especially in front of her in a public space 🙁 idk i feel like that put her in a weird position now that our relationship is a little bit more of a friendship (?)

(context: just earlier this week we both cried over her leaving the school and it was a sweet little bonding moment, and i have her phone number if i need to tell/ask her smth… )

idk it’s just another example of me feeling like im being “too much” even though im not trying to be overbearing. ugh worst fear is her feeling the need to tell me that she’s setting boundaries with me. i doubt that would happen but my mind is a nightmare factory and loves coming up with the most gut wrenching scenarios possible xx help me lol

#personal #sorry i dont see my therapist for another week so tumblr gets the brundt of my inner turmoil #still processing a stressful + upsetting situation so here i am