#solar scraps

[betweenlands]

Jimmy Solidarity's Guide To Dying First

Congratulations and/or sorry that happened! Dying first in a series is always really rough, and people are probably going to feel bad they ended your series early. Unless you're me. They don't feel bad about killing ME off first, which is probably why I beef it a lot.

Anyway, here's some specific ways you might have your death invalidated or made about me:

Are you new to this series? Oh my god I am so sorry. The Watchers are about to be SO weird about you and I honestly hope I die next so I can take some of the heat off you.

Did we die in the same incident? Expect the Watchers to say I died first anyway.

Are you Lizzie? Expect the Watchers to say it's because of our ~sibling bond~.

Are you Scott or Tango? Expect the Watchers to make up something about our whirlwind romance dooming us both.

Were you TEAMED with Scott or Tango? See above, except it's actually because my "curse" is super contagious or something.

Were you teamed with ME? See previous two points.

Are you Pearl or Grian? Expect the Watchers to say it was totally, definitely because of wanting to ensure the same person didn't win twice, even at the cost of the canary curse being broken.

Are you Martyn? Same as above but also -- Lol. Nerd.

What else should you expect?

You're going to start growing feathers. Sorry! The Watchers are going to try to "canary-code" you too, so they don't have to stop being weird about me.

The Watchers loooove to take credit for things that were barely even them. If anything happened involving the two of us for five or more seconds, it's a sign that I "cursed" you to die first.

If you're really lucky, the Watchers will make up some nonsense about toxic fumes or something that ensures I still get the brunt of their weirdness.

See you soon, probably, because for some reason Martyn has decided to cater directly to the Watchers and make it his sole goal in life to ensure I permadie as soon as humanly possible!

Love or whatever, Jimmy Solidarity

#jimmy solidarity #solidaritygaming #life series #secret life #slsmp #secret life spoilers // #trafficseries #yt #txt #orig #solar scraps #solar scrawls #hi here's a minific! something possessed me and i started having jimmy emotions? #i blame the having had enter shikari on loop.

[craftlands]

[sighs, cracks knuckles] sometimes if you want something done right, you have to do it yourself

#dollzi-adjacent fic coming whenever the hell it's done idk #it's a nice break getting to write a very silly narrator compared to our main project rn #plus i just think doll's neat. she and uzi are cool character foils. you know how it is with spaghetti #murder drones #solar scraps #btw the ''done right'' bit is me being in the market for a specific type of character interaction fic. not a diss i promise #it might not even end up being dollzi in anything other than subtext tbh. i just wanted to write smth post ep4

[roseredsnow]

Water propagating kitchen scraps

So I mentioned on a reblog the other way that there's some kitchen scraps (mostly veg) you can regrow the greens of via water propagation and my parents are out for the night so I now have photos to use for a proper step by step.

Step one

In my example the other day I used onions and carrots so that's what I'm using here, step one is simply to cut off the end we'll be using, for carrots this is the top and for onions the bottom, you'll want to leave a couple inches.

Step two

Honestly for the first few days this is literally the only other step.

Place the lowermost end in water, not too much and don't submerge entirely as this will promote rot, but just enough for the roots to grow from.

(Unfortunately I don't have a deeper plate to show the carrot with at the moment but there is water there)

That's the end of what I have photos for currently I'll reblog once I have more but next steps after roots have grown is to plant them in soil as normal.

————————————————————————

However I do have another example which is ginger (I believe this also works for potatoes)

For this some store bought gingers may need washing first as apparently some place spray them with something to prevent further growth that was not the case with what we had at home though.

To then encourage growth of an eye I think you're supposed to leave it in a dark place, again this had already developed for what I'm using so can't share picture of before.

In the picture below the bit at the end with a blue arrow is an eye and the red arrows are pointing to potential eyes.

Now you can use a full piece of ginger and do normal water propagation just make sure the eyes are above water but from what I've seen if you cut a section off this may be the better method (probably to prevent rot).

Place the section in between two pieces of damp paper towel.

And store in a dark place.

Once again cause I've literally just started this and never done it before I don't have any further pictures but same again once roots are forming burry in soil.

With all of these you can actually go straight to soil but propagating means you can ensure roots form.

If you're struggling to find containers the right size to stop your scraps from being too submerged you can use cocktail sticks suspend it in air but I don't have any.

Let me know if there's any questions hopefully I can help.

#solarpunk #solar punk #hopepunk #gardening #kitchen scraps #vegetables

[blueberry-mufffinz]

tsams solar climbed his way into my brain and is my favorite tsams character now(previously had no favorite) and once my hands arent full with a bunch of other stuff i am going to singlehandedly fill tumblr with solar art <- (a fool who thinks they can draw more than one drawing a week)

#dough scraps #tsams solar #sams solar #solar tsams #solar sams #the sun and moon show #tsams #sams #|| #trying to get my tags organizied when i tag things #tsams solar is so so great

[ask-samseclipse]

hey clipse how ya doing (i mean obviously not that great but I'm low on good questions)

also did ya know the spell, ya know the one that got ya here was wrong. sun said queso instead of uhh I don't remember the right one but ye.

//Solar (far left, bottom panel) belongs to @eclipsedcrystalstar

#sams eclipse #sun and moon show #crystalverse solar #mans is already making threats lmao #this was originally 4 panels but i scrapped part of it near the end thats why it took so long tonight #i dont have work tomorrow or saturday so hopefully i can get a couple extra responses done those days! #chrono tag #arc 1

[artoutoftheblue]

More doodles cuz I had too much motivation for them

BTB Moon wont only take things just to bite them, but he would definitely take things just to be petty when hes annoyed at whoever the object belongs to

Also CSS Lunar would absolutely love Scraps, he adores cats

Last one is Solar helping out Blaze with figuring out the layout of Eclipses castle, plus noting any weaknesses they have

Blaze and Scraps belongs to @churchydragon

#he absolutely stole that hammer from CSS Moon #BTB Moon probably got on top of one of the play structures so he cant reach him #fnaf security breach #daycare attendant #breaking the bounds au #celestial siblings show au #corrupt moon #lunar #solar/eclipse #css blaze #css scraps #blues art #art for others #blues crossover doodles #btb x css

[13thpythagoras]

um w what

So it costs $400 to buy a wind generator powerful enough to run an average home?

Like you mean $400 plus installation fees and setup costs to knock out someone's utility bill?...a utility bill that might be running $200-$400 a month all year long?

Food for thought!

#energy #home economics #wind power has gotten cheap #solar panels use rare earth minerals whereas wind power can basically be made from recycled scrap

[shanitglobalindia-blog]

The rest of the components in a PV solar panel consist of good quality glass, aluminium frames, polymers, silicon, copper and silver paste (used for the printed conductors on each cell), all of which (up to 95%), can in principle be successfully recycled.

#Scrap Solar Panel Recycling machine

[tyrnn]

Kalista Sketchery

Posted using PostyBirb

#sketch #scraps #Kalista #Phoenix #Birb #Sun #solar #adorabig

[bombz-n-bluntz]

After The Plan failed, hog and I had a couple months of downtime before we went back out to the world

#was kinda nice honestly. boring unless we were on scrap runs #i was in charge of clearin the solar panels #kinda dumb since i had trouble stayin on the roof with a peg #not like the fall'd kill me tho #talkin #mems

[betweenlands]

Impulse thinks he might've started seeing things early this time.

It happens at least once a season at this rate, so it's not really a surprise on that side of things. And it's not as bad as the boogeyman clock-ticking he's heard twice now, so, he'll take it, just... it hasn't even been a full session yet?

He'd like to say it started when he ended up tag-teaming with Gem and Scott, but the truth is, that's not quite it. It started when he got his task and ended up in the cherry grove up there, and that little part of him he knows is basically a ghost detector went this task isn't so bad -- maybe people will actually trust me this time! There's never been a bad guy who built with cherrywood, right?

Really weird thing for a ghost detector sense to say. But then Gem and Scott caught up, and they sort of just fell into a natural alliance, and yeah -- Impulse looks at their location-in-progress and thinks we're gonna be the good guys this season, and for a split second feels this headache.

Then it's gone.

It happens again when Skizz visits, which is probably part of a task, but all Impulse knows is... he walks up to Skizz while he's saying "I've been that guy, that all I do is tell the truth, and I'm a loyal sword -- I think I might be the guy that just wants to lie to everybody and just be a jerk!"

Knee-jerk response: "Nah. Don't love that idea. Hate it."

Internal ghost-detector response: I mean, who says those things are mutually exclusive?

Impulse has to stop himself from whipping around fully at the voice, which sounds almost like Scott, except Scott isn't behind them right now -- just Jimmy, and past that the cherrywood trees. He thinks for a second there might be a flash of red among all those pink blossoms. He shrugs it off as Grian skulking around, even though he knows Grian doesn't have pink hair.

A few minutes later, he knows it definitely wasn't Scott, because the guy shows up to immediately point out a zombie villager appearing on the mountain -- there's a librarian, right there, aggroed more or less directly on him. They scramble to get it in a boat and cover its head. Some part of him suggests they should bury it underground, just in case. They only need one more.

Next sighting is a bit more difficult to ignore, mainly because Impulse knows when he's being made fun of, and when a goat smacks him while he's trying to wrangle it into a boat, he catches sight of someone with long blonde hair cackling like a maniac about it from the other side of the border wall, and before he can do anything more than think huh, how'd False get past the border? they're gone.

False is not in this season. He tries his best to put that behind him and inform his teammates of the real issue, which is:

"YOU SAID THAT GOATS WERE NOT A PROBLEM," Impulse yells, trying to pretend the panic is about the loss of a half heart. "I JUST GOT GOATED." He can see the campfire Gem and Scott set up over their shoulders. Someone wearing red is sitting at one of the seats. Impulse resolutely ignores the fact that he hasn't seen Grian at all so far.

That's it for the ghosts for a while, enough to lull him into a false sense of security. Maybe it is just Grian sneaking around. (Maybe the guy in a red poncho he sees in the distance in the badlands Scar has based just outside of is just Grian reliving his glory days.)

"By the way, this is Traitor Scar's!" Scar says brightly.

You think his partner's Grian again? a voice says wryly. It's not either of their voices. It's not the voice of anyone Impulse even knows, for that matter. It sounds like it came from over by the badlands.

"Trader Scar's," Impulse repeats, realizing he's misheard what Scar actually said.

Eh, the voice says. Like recognizes like.

#secret life #secret life smp #impulsesv #i have gone certifiably off the shits in case anyone was wondering #yall 3l impulse and d1 legundo have STUFF in common #source dude TRUST me #trafficseries #slsmp #secret life spoilers // #i think normally i wouldn't maintag this but i wrote this FOR the besties that see the cinematic parallels so #deceit smp #deceit #yt #txt #orig #solar scrawls #solar scraps

[sonic-fankid-showdown]

The Sonic Fankid Showdown: Round 1!

These are the match ups for the first round of the tournament! The polls will go up this Wednesday, April 24th and will be active until May 1st for you all to vote for your favorite fankids!

Image transcript under the cut.

Blair Acorn Rose (@icednebula) v/s Comet the Hedgehog (@sonicanon)

Gina (@meetje-rotyourbrainhere) v/s Cipher (@altairsarts)

Comet the Hedgehog (@sonic-polis) v/s Sunny the Chao (@wereh0gz)

Wafer the Chao (@pokeypoqi) v/s Leonid the Cyborg Hedgehog (@deimostes)

Sakura (@estellardreams) v/s Leo the Hedgehog (@aexonn)

Nova Rose (@spicychimera) v/s Blur the Hedgehog (@muffin-gods)

Spike the Hedgehog (@valerytheweirdo) v/s Spark the Sable (@sci-twi)

Flicker Prower (@burning-stars98) v/s Scrap the Hedgehog (@the-gay-ghost-king)

Fletcher the Fox (@susahnasomething) v/s Amelia Solaral (@lethalbreadkills)

Violet the Hedgehog (@t4tsurge) v/s Horizon the Jackal (@scorpiolight-madd)

Mordred (@mephiles-the-jester) v/s Lapis (@time-of-your-life-au)

Stellar the Hedgehog (@emthimofnight) v/s Rapidfire-Harley Davidson (@confused-bagel)

Nymph the Cat (@einelitas) v/s Sasha the Hedgehog (@sapphanimates)

Star (@sonicgetsrawed) v/s Punchline (@iihavenomouth)

Pegasus (@transzsonix) v/s Chroma Prower (@m3tr0n0m333)

Saydee (@kuroshirae) v/s Echo (@a-crow-with-a-pen)

Neso the Hedgehog (@foolnamedjoey) v/s Aryan (@totaleclipse573)

Dill Picke (@sonilver-yuri) v/s Smith (@koreyeet)

Winter the Lemur (@sonicrewrittenau) v/s Alice (@invisableartist)

Whistle the Wolf (@khalewren) v/s Calamity (@alex-chullin)

Splotch the Hedgehog (@thefakehedgehogaroundhere) v/s Tom the Hedgehog (@ShadowAndSonic96)

Twitch the Child (@colorfulplasma) v/s Mav the Hedgehog (@val-va2)

Vallerie the Hedgehog (@so-called-egg) v/s Aurora (@adhd-sonic-the-hedgehog)

Ebony (@idrptr3) v/s Castor Niclaw (@spiritofrainbursts

Emmie the Hedgehog (@head---ache) v/s Silhouette Rose (@galacticghoste)

Tulip (@silvers-starrway) v/s Sunshine the Hedgehog (@yellowvixen)

Pacífica the Cat (@saku0115) v/s Midnight the Android (@kristhesheep)

Aster (@afuntimepartyy) v/s Beau D'Coolette (@mischeva)

Blitz (@jestopolis) v/s Juice the Hedgehog (@sonlc)

Jade the Hybrid (@carnation-damnation) v/s Autumn (@artist-fan146)

Kaiko (@somemismatchedsocks) v/s Gigi (@w0lp3rtinger)

Ember Robotnik (@the-sky-queen) v/s Sprout "Sept" the Jackal (@snowpearart)

See you on wednesday, everyone! And good luck!

#sonic fanchild #sonic fankid #sonic oc #sonic fankid showdown #also!!! sorry there were some people it wouldnt let me tag properly #please let me know if i misspelled your url or something so i can fix it

[roseredsnow]

I've started making a reversible waistcoat that I wanted to share.

Both these fabrics were leftover from cosplays and I realised they'd look quite nice together. So currently basics sewn togther, I'm gonna use a probably slightly lighter brown probably leather effect trim around the edges to make it a bit easier.

Obviously still needs buttons as well and I zoomed in way too much taking those photos but all well.

It's been a bit of a pain with the velvet being stretchy and the other fabric not but I've worked with worse.

#solarpunk #hopepunk #solar punk #scrap fabric #handmade #sewing

[afeelgoodblog]

The Best News of Last Week - May 15, 2023

🧲 - Magnetic Marvels: Researchers Flip the Switch on Depression

1. New Zealand Government announces prescriptions charges will be free.

The $5 prescription fee at pharmacies will be scrapped in July. This is set to save about 3 million people a year money, and in particular 770,000 people aged over 65. It will make most prescriptions in New Zealand free.

Free access to medicines is also hoped to ease pressure on the over-burdened health system by helping people get medicines sooner.

2. Platypuses return to Sydney's Royal National Park after disappearing for decades

Platypuses have been relocated to the Royal National Park in Sydney, after they disappeared from the park's waterways about 50 years ago. A joint project by the University of New South Wales, NSW National Parks and Wildlife Service and the World Wildlife Fund has reintroduced five females to the Hacking River, with a group of males to follow next week.

3. 74-year-old musician Otis Taylor gets Denver high school diploma decades after being expelled for hair

A musician who was expelled from a Denver high school over 50 years ago received his diploma. Otis Taylor was kicked out of Manual High School in 1966 because of his hair. This was decades before laws ending racial hair discrimination. Denver Public Schools wanted to right a wrong.

4. Researchers treat depression by reversing brain signals traveling the wrong way (with magnets)

A new study led by Stanford Medicine researchers is the first to reveal how magnetic stimulation treats severe depression: by correcting the abnormal flow of brain signals. Powerful magnetic pulses applied to the scalp to stimulate the brain can bring fast relief to many severely depressed patients for whom standard treatments have failed.

The FDA-cleared treatment, known as Stanford neuromodulation therapy, incorporates advanced imaging technologies to guide stimulation with high-dose patterns of magnetic pulses that can modify brain activity related to major depression. Compared with traditional TMS, which requires daily sessions over several weeks or months, SNT works on an accelerated timeline of 10 sessions each day for just five days.

5. Electricity generation through solar, wind and water exceeded total demand in mainland Spain on Tuesday, a pattern that will be repeated more and more in the future

The Spanish power grid on Tuesday tasted an appetizer of the renewable energy banquet that is expected to flourish in the coming years. For nine hours, between 10 a.m. and 7 p.m., the generation of green electricity was more than enough to cover 100% of Spanish peninsular demand, a milestone that had already been reached on previous occasions, but not for such a prolonged period.

6. RI Senate passes bill making lunch free at all public schools

Free lunch for all public school students in Rhode Island is one step closer to becoming a reality.

Tuesday night the Rhode Island Senate overwhelmingly passed a bill by a vote of 31-4 that would do just that. If the companion bill in the House were to pass, that takes effect July 1. The bill would make breakfast and lunch free for all public school students in the state, regardless of their household income.

7. Critically endangered red wolf pups born at North Carolina Zoo

The North Carolina Zoo in Asheboro celebrated the arrival of “not one but TWO litters” of the world’s most endangered wolf – the red wolf – in late April and early May.

A total of nine pups were born – three to parents Marsh and Roan, and six to Denali and May – the zoo announced on May 9.

----

That's it for this week :)

This newsletter will always be free. If you liked this post you can support me with a small kofi donation:

Buy me a coffee ❤️

Also don’t forget to reblog.

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#best news of last week

[seamsterslocal]

summer binder picture tutorial

this is the third binder ive made for myself recently and the first one i’m writing up. it’s designed to do a few things: 1) allow me to put it on by myself without dislocating my shoulders 2) allow me to breathe well enough to partake in normal activity 3) be cool enough to wear throughout a muggy 90-100F summer 4) not constrict my ribs in a way that aggravates my lack of connective tissue and causes intense pain.

this has become necessary even though i had top surgery many years ago, because when i had it i was extremely skinny and since then i’ve increased in size by about 50%. this has been really fucking good for my health in every single way* except that when my chest is squishy or moves at all it’s So Goddamn Triggering for me. but also since ive had top surgery ive developed and/or been made away of a plethora of chronic conditions that make every single commercially available binding option medically impossible. unbound, my chest is pretty much what you’d expect for a chubby cis guy but venturing out into the world in just a tshirt no longer works for me

*anyone who badmouths weight gain or fat bodies in the notes WILL be blocked

under the cut are a bunch of process pictures and explanations of what they all mean:

first i’ll give you a look at the pieces and measurements:

most of the seams are sewn in this picture and one half is turned inside out, allowing you to see both the finished dimensions (right) and the placement of the fusible horsehair canvas that gives this lil scrap of linen any structure at all (left)

to get your chest measurement, you’re gonna have to do some math:

first measure above and below what you want to bind. average these numbers. mine are something like 32 and 34, which average to 33. subtract a few inches--this is to allow the air movement between the laces at center front and back, critical in the summertime. i deleted 3 inches bc i like that number but you can go bigger if you want. the more inches you subtract here, the more youll be able to ratchet all your chest material down later, but at the same time you need to leave enough fabric for a sturdy garment. let’s say a range of 2-6 inches/5-15cm. by taking your measurements this way, you’re essentially measuring the chest you would like to have. that + the horsehair canvas work together to compress any squishy tissue/force anything that doesnt compress up and to the outside (basically into the armpit/lower shoulder--the chest might stick out but it will give a very puffed chest captain america pectoral silhouette)

you can also see how ive clipped my curves and pre-drilled my lacing holes. i used the marlin spike on my knife to open up the holes on the interfacing side, mainly as a way of marking them. this worked well bc the interfacing’s glue kept the linen from raveling

this is the same stage but looking at the non-interfaced grey linen/cotton blend (the black is some 100% linen from my cabbage stash). you can see ive broken the solar-plexus-to-back measurement up into a bunch of pieces to save on fabric but that’s not necessary. my original pattern was just two pieces (front and back) and chopping the straps into thirds on both sides was aesthetic

in the following picture you can really see how this is really just overgrown regency stays:

i thought about doing side lacing but didn’t think that would be comfortable for me. on the front, the side seam allowance was pressed inwards before turning to create a finished looking slot. on the back the side seam is left unfinished with an extra wide seam allowance, and is inserted into that slot.

here’s a closeup on it pinned in place (you can adjust the angle of the side seam and the fit during this pinning stage):

that side seam was just topstitched in place once i had the fit how i liked it, and the armhole was reinforced with more topstitching

alright, time for eyelets: first, you can see how well the marking worked:

next, two rows of basted eyelets (left), one row of eyelets sewn with a doubled and waxed cotton thread (center right), and one row of eyelets opened and stainless steel rings placed (right).

next time i’m going to mark the eyelets same as i did above, but do this step differently--i’ll mark and baste the steel rings in place BEFORE widening the eyelets. this is bc i had a lot of problems keeping the eyelets on center

eyelets half done on this one! on the left are eyelets sewn with doubled and waxed cotton thread and on the right eyelets sewn with quadrupled and waxed thread. the center is basting again. i was able to force the holes back in line while sewing the eyelets but it was kinda annoying. adding a second picture that doesnt have great focus but hopefully shows how that process worked and shows the spike clearly

i ended up using this white cotton thread because it’s stronger than my black cotton thread (which the rest of it is sewn with). [eta: after this was first posted, i pressed the whole thing heavily, which effectively de-waxed the thread, and i dyed the whole thing a medium charcoal grey, the thread blends in perfectly on the lighter side and isn’t such a sore thumb on the darker side]

bonus: the piecing layout for that little piece of strap. the whole light gray half of the binder was made from 1/2 of one of the legs i cut off some linen suit pants to make slutty camping shorts last year and i really really didn’t want to break into any of the other three halves for this garment--i have Plans for it

overall the fit of this is incredible. it DOESNT hurt my ribs which every zip-up garment ive been able to find (and it is difficult) does due to really thick elastic at the base. it doesnt aggravate my sensory issues with the synthetic fibers that every commercial option is made of. i can walk up a hill or stairs, or go to pt, without getting too out of breath. i can eat with it tight, or loosen the front easily and without taking it off to make eating easier and less nausea-inducing. it is reversible!

best of all the lacing at the back gives the garment enough movement for me to get it on without dislocating, and the interfacing and steel rings give it structure once it’s on. the shaping comes only from fusible horsehair linen canvas and stainless steel rings like youd use for chainmail, there’s no boning at all, which makes it very quick to sew (except the eyelets, but metal grommets would be sturdy and quick provided theyre of good quality)

there’s a small amount of gaping on the outside of the shoulder strap, which i plan on fixing with a tiny tiny dart in the armpit, i want to add pockets to tuck the laces into, and i need a better lace for the back, but it’s completely wearable in time for the 90 weather next week which is all i wanted. i’ll do a reblog when it’s perfectly finished with an update on the fit but for now it is done enough 

the little ridge where it doesnt lay flat against the shoulder is most visible with just a single t shirt over it. with a flannel or a sweater, it disappears, and by itself, it’s hidden in movement

eta: after dyeing this, i relaced it a bit looser in the back and that gape mainly disappeared. ive decided to leave it in instead of smoothing it with a dart because the loose fabric gives space for my chest to expand when breathing and shapes my silhouette in a way that emphasizes my shoulders

#sewing #trans #trans man #binding #body shaping #cotton #disability accommodations #physical #sensory #eyelets #fusible interfacing #historical fashion #regency #horsehair canvas #lacing #linen #lining #new build #drafted pattern #picture tutorial #piecing is contemporary too #stainless steel #stashbusting #stays #structured garment #treadle machine

[seat-safety-switch]

Everyone is all up in arms about what kind of energy source will power the cities of tomorrow. Is it natural gas, the invisible menace that leaks out of shitty welds? Could it be nuclear energy, the thing that makes cool-looking cooling towers and rocks you're not allowed to touch? Or could it be simply harnessing the power of the sun and sticking them into a bank of batteries?

If you ask my local recycling depot, which is stuffed to the absolute gills with scrapped solar panels, the answer is "however many of these things you can carry." And since the power had been cut off at my place ever since my landlord didn't come back from that vacation, it's my answer, too.

Solar companies have been going out of business in my area, claiming that there are unforeseen problems to be solved in the "actually installing solar panels on customer homes" challenge. The venture capitalists who control them have basically decided that any obstacle at all is too many obstacles, and shut the companies down rather than spend five minutes trying to think of a solution, as you do when you have no useful value to society.

It didn't take me long to put these things on top of my house. Turns out that the bolts you need to mount them with are basically the same as the ones I'd been smuggling out of the Pick N Pull in my pockets for the last few years. Something new called "met-ric." A couple spritzes of shoplifted Windex later to clean up the cells, and we were making enough electricity to cook any squirrel that was stupid enough to climb onto my roof.

At first, everything was going great. I could now microwave burritos, and probably other kinds of things if you labour under the pointless delusion that there are any other things to eat that are better than a burrito. Then the sun went down, because it was night. Now having been cruelly denied the thing I only just recently became accustomed to, I began to freak out.

That's when it hit me. Batteries were the answer. Energy storage.

Thanks to the local Wal-Mart and their incredibly lax loss-prevention department, I now have electricity 24 hours a day. All I had to do was shoplift enough flashlights, AA batteries, and duct tape to make it through the night. Sure, it's a pain crawling up there every evening to tape the flashlights onto the panels and make sure they have fresh batteries, but to be honest I would be up here every night trying to knock all the charred wildlife off the wires anyway. Don't you rodent bastards know that I'm trying to save the environment up here?