#so now I'm INCREDIBLY anxious because in order to not accept I have to email like eight different people with my reasons

[tealeavesandthorns]

// just a rant in the tags please ignore lol

#//so after all the shit with my new workplace and the stress this week from my new manager #they've just invited me to the 2.5 day 'retreat' they try to make all the new starters go to #//If I'm not accepting (which I'm not) #- because being in the middle of nowhere - when I can't drive and am unable to escape - with people I don't know - having to share #facilities - cook with other people and generally not get a restbite from others is my literal idea of hell #like ask me #what does hell look like for you laura #it would be a cabin in the middle of nowhere with people I don't know - forced fun and 'team building' excersizes - no public transport for #miles and having to take bullshit 'personality' tests to 'help understand a companies values and bullshit agendas' #so now I'm INCREDIBLY anxious because in order to not accept I have to email like eight different people with my reasons #the reason is simple #I'm autistic - I have anxiety and depression - I'm introverted and I HATE these stupid sorts of bullshit events #I've already got a pretty good idea of the companies culture and values I've been here four weeks and also I've read all your policies and #been to all the stupid talks #it's a literal fucking data entry job #I literally do a job a relatively intelligent monkey could do #why tf do I have to sell my soul to do it #just let me do my work and leave me alone #I can already see how the email chain is going to go #I'm going to state my reason - too which I'll get told well I really should be going and how do I know if I don't try it and we have things #in place for ND people #which #no you don't #and then I'm going to get treated like a kid that doesn't know her own mind rather than a 33 year old woman who knows her own brain inside #out because she's spent the last 19 years trying to figure out just wtf is wrong with her and has recently found out #I can't rant to my other half about this - not because he won't understand - he hated his but because I just don't want to put it on him