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#shout out to the people who can draw animals and furries btw bc my god it's amazing and PLEASE TELL ME UR SECRETS
caramelmochacrow · 1 year
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happy b-day miiko!!!! :DDD
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Im about to finally watch that NC review of The Wall after watching a bunch of videos about it and Im just gonna put my thoughts during it in this post
Okay I just checked this review has 85k dislikes, 22k likes and 1.5 million views Im scared
I also havent watched actually watched The Wall btw, but I did watch Folding Ideas video if that helps
Oh god I really liked NC in like 2019 and even the beginning of 2020 and his greeting is giving me vietnam flashbacks
I hate Dougs voice already
Okay a bunch of shit is happening
Now theyre just showing clips from the original movie but as a horrible montage with fire edited over it
Dougs face makes me uncomcortable and I hate looking at it
Hes singing again goddamnit
Thank god, an ad
He stopped singing again thank god
What the fuck is that
I hate those giggles theyre awful
Why is Doug Walker a vampire
The costuming is straight up awful what is the budget on this
The cg is so bad and outdated why did they even bother
What are these dance moves
Theyre mentioning twitter now???
I just watched that 3 musical minute sequence and I have no idea what Doug is even trying to say
He spat out a bird? Huh??
What
Bro the animation is so bad
This would literally be completely incoherent without the on the nose lyrics
"So long Oscar-bait song/smoke a bong and it'll feel less wrong" bro what
I havent even watched the fucking movie and even I know hes missing the point, how did I ever think his reviews were good
I didnt not need to see Doug Walker wailing about being Jesus while shirtless in front of badly edited stockphoto water
What is that
His acting is so bad and I still hate his face
Im not even halfway through
I just wanna go back to working on my AU while watching actually good longform reviews
I cant even read the comments bc I wanna focus on the review itself I hate it here
This frame is very blue. I love the color, but its kinda out of place and was probably not done on purpose
What now
What
Why
I wanna commit crimes
Have I mentioned that I hate looking at Dougs face
That was, without exageration, the worst sponsor Ive ever seen
ITS NOT OVER???
I too call the people I am writing a love letter to whiny and pretentious
Oh god
What in the world
I didnt think it was possible but Dougs singing voice just got worse
Dude they drew on his head with like, marker or something and I can see it smudge
He got all these people and all these props and had these wholeass songs written but he couldnt even brush his fucking teeth before going on Youtube
Okay theyre doing a full on twitter song
What is this shit
This is the most boomer centrist thing I have ever seen in my life
What the fuck was that
The eye imagery going on is geniuienly very unsettling and kind of disorienting but I cant really appreciate it bc its just so bad
What is that
AND AD THANK GOD
Back to the bullshit
What is that
The greenscreen looks so bad
Only 11 minutes lets fucking gooooooo
Doug Walker standing in that hallway doing a power stance is my new sleep paralasis demon
Dude what are they even doing
What is that squirrel thing on this random guys counter
I dont understand whats going on
What in the world is that furry nightmare squirrel in the studio
Why is the edgy cowboy furry OC lecturing me about The Arts
I legimately cant understand most of the words being said and I have no idea if its because my brain has been fried or because they just went with the first take of every line
This part of the review is usually praised as "the best part" so Im both intrigued and really scared
Oh god its another furry OC
Okay I actually quite like the design of the grey furry with the big hat and six arms I just really hate the way he moves, I think it would look better as a static model or preferably a 2d drawing
Another Ad!
I also like the black one with the white horns and red accents
Okay what the fuck is that
I mean the one with the way too many antlers is a bit better than the one before it but it looks like the designer kinda gave up at this point
This feels like an acid trip but in the worst way
I think this is the first thing Ive seen that had a dragon in it, that didnt make it better at all
I mean. i guess this is very impressive but why
I feel like every single voice actor for these creatures recorded the lyrics with a completely different mic
Hey, what the fuck
Well this sure is all happening
What
"Well, the movie ended on such an open vagueness that it only makes sense the the review end on such an open vagueness" hey fuckface, thats not how reviews work
Thank you musician guy who had no lines up until now (I think his name was Corey??)
All of this bullshit and for WHAT
Theyre singing the spongebob squarepants theme song
These 30 seconds where the most I enjoyed myself consecutively during this entire 40 minute video
I dont know how, but Doug Walker somehow manages to stay unlikeable even while hes shouting out a charity that probably does wonderful work
In conclusion, there is a total of 5 Things I Enjoyed in this 40 minute review:
That gray furry with the hat and six arms
That black furry with the horns and red accents and eyes
The shade of blue during that one very blue shot
The spongebob squarepants theme
Apparently Griff Taylor (the son of the musician guy, Corey Taylor) is a fan of NC for some reason and his dad pretty much did this for him, and I can appreciate that on some level
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