#she kept telling me how embarrassing it felt to call for therapy and it mustve been since she was shitfaced while talking on the phone

[videostak]

I have no idea where this lying thing started with my mom. Like idk alot of the problems began to become rly bad around covid til present and its hard to think of the exact moment but its just insane i have no idea what to do w/ someone who is so comfortable constantly lying. And its not like a lying in specific situations type scenario she will just constantly lie w/o any shame even if we're all telling her we know shes lying. Like a therapist is def the only option that could help but i dont even know how much help it will do since shes so comfortable lying to people right to their faces that idk how many sessions shed need to tell the truth even once. I hate that i feel invested in this again mainly cause i dont want my sister to feel as awful abt it as i kno she does and also will make the situation w/ my dad and mom worse very badly and i dont want my little sister to continue to be raised so badly. My mom used to be genuinely a good hearted person since both me and my sister turned out respectful n stuff its just heartbreaking how much she just worsens our relationship w/ her and the lying is honestlu worse than the drinking cause it makes any communication impossible. She told me the following day after we talked that she wasnt gonna drink and is gonna change and less than two days later already bought two wine bottles. I hate having this fear knowing theres only so much she can drink b4 she gets into an accident and at this point i just pray it doesnt happen when she has somebody else in the car. Its insane how much she just totally disregards so much of what she taught us as kids. Lying isnt a problem for her nor is drunk driving and she constantly gaslights us when we show concern. All she does now is beg for forgiveness whenever she gets caught. Rn u feel saddled w/ trying to make a change but i cant even look at her. I hope a breakthrough can happen soon just incase i get that thrift job cause if i do get i know things are gonna get worse w/ no one home. I just rly cant stand her and it drives me so mad. A week ago i was able to be unfazed by it but now i feel involved again since if nothing changes she could end up srsly hurting family members that i do care for. Like i hope therapy can make some change buy thatll take a very long while but the fact that shes doing it shows she atleast wants to try but idk it just is fucked. I am a happy person tho its not getting me down cause i am v optimistic abt this thrift job. And just trying to be at peace. W/ my own life.

#she kept telling me how embarrassing it felt to call for therapy and it mustve been since she was shitfaced while talking on the phone #when they asked for her name she tried spelling it out and kept messing up and kept cutting the ppl off as they were talking