#separated into parts bc otherwise it would've been too much text

[troubleshipping]

Long list of various Team Rocket headcanons

Recently I had a really nice talk with @masterstarpikachu about Rocketshipping/general Team Rocket stuff, and some of the headcanons that were brought up are just too good not to be shared with the world so I have compiled them into a big post

Warning: Some small nsfw elements at the very beginning of this, please beware if you don’t like that kinda thing! Nothing explicit but like the evil word s*x is mentioned once so shield yo eyes kiddos

Contents of this post include:

- Controversy about the see-through level of Pokéballs - Meowth and the Pokémon shittalking humans behind their backs - Meowth and Jessie tease James about literally everything - Meowth is a supportive friend in the most asshole-y way possible - Jessie actually being nice for once - Food - Hot take but Jessebelle is a yandere - Jessie almost dies but it's okay because the ship happens

Actual list under the cut because this good content here got long

- Starting topic that triggered this entire conversation: - Jessie and James are about to get intimate, but just in that moment - *Pokéball release sound* “WOOOOBBUFFET” - So that raised an important question: - How much exactly are Pokémon able to see out of their Pokéballs? - Because most of the time when they’re called out mid-battle they immediately charge in without hesitating, so it seems like they know what’s been going on - Larvitar was able to see out of its egg shell too which suggests similar things for Pokéballs - Trainers, do not leave your Pokéballs in the same room you do private stuff in

- What if that’s how Meowth finds out Jessie and James are a thing - “Meowth, how did you know? What do you mean Seviper told you?? How did Seviper know???” - “…..oh my god” - Mime Jr was too young to see that - James will never live it down - He’s too ashamed to look his son in the eyes ever again - Probably needs to sit him down to have *the talk* and it’s the most shameful thing he’s ever had to do - Does Mime Jr even understand what he’s saying? Does it care about what humans do? Probably not, but Meowth won’t think it’s necessary to point that out

- I like the idea of Meowth sharing gossip with the other Pokémon in general - He’s barely seen talking to Pokémon, which is honestly a waste if you ask me? It’s like the writers forgot that bilingual people don’t actually forget their mother tongue - Imagine Meowth and the other Pokémon just complaining about the dumb shit the humans do - Besides, let him have some friends he won’t be the third wheel to lmao

- Literally tho, imagine all their Pokémon had seen their masters, ahem.. “blast off” - Poor souls didn’t know Pokéballs were see-through from the inside - Jessie would pretend not to care, she’s above that. There’s no reason at all to be ashamed. But she’d be blushing so hard she wouldn’t fool anyone. - Shit’s awkward no matter how tough you are - James wouldn’t even try to pretend, James would straight up die - RIP James

- On another note - James totally makes those little high pitched squeaky sounds during sex and you cannot change my mind it’s canon - You know exactly what I mean - There’s literally no way he doesn’t - He’s tryna be all sexy and smooth and stuff but then Jessie starts touching him or something and he just SQUEAKS - Secretly she finds it kinda hot in a weird way but she’d never admit it - Pretends it’s a coincidence that she’ll keep trying to get him to make more of those sounds - Meanwhile Meowth outside the door is like “what the actual fuck James” - “Jimmy’s such a weird one” - He’d tease James to no end about it - Meowth embarrassing James about details of stuff he shouldn’t even know about is my new favorite thing - Also Jessie trying to stop him but also holding back laughter because “well he’s not wrong” - “WHOSE SIDE ARE YOU ON?!” - C’mon she can’t turn down an opportunity to tease him - James is then all embarrassed and lowkey offended and gives her the silent treatment - He refuses to talk to her ever again - Aka for like the next half hour or so - Eventually she’d probably apologize though because even she isn’t THAT mean - At least not when it comes to James - Not always - Maybe - She gets soft around him when nobody’s around to see it - Sometimes - And maybe he’d forgive her if she did those things again...

- Jessie being soft with James is my absolute weakness though - Especially since they’ve been friends for so long and he knows full well that nobody else is allowed to see that side of her ever - It’d definitely make him feel special and loved - Imagine Jessie letting her guard down and being kind to James for no reason other than because she genuinely wants him to be happy - I am weak - Even if it’s just little things - Especially those tbh - Just trying to cheer him up when he’s down instead of simply telling him to get over it - Saving a nice bottlecap she found even though she never understood that hobby of his - Just saving it for him because maybe he’d want it - He’d be so touched - Probably would make his entire week - He’d save that one bottlecap forever - Even if it’s not one of the kind he collects, or a duplicate or sth - It’d be his most prized possession

- Something I really want to happen is them sharing their food properly, because you know that for those two that’d be a HUGE sign of affection - The anime may pretend they share everything equally (they say so in an episode) but honestly 90% of the time they get in literal fights over the last scrap - So one of them happily sharing could even be the first step of them realizing their feelings - Like, maybe James would let Jessie eat his portion - She’d definitely take longer than him to show any signs of affection - And she just - “Why’d you let me have it is something wrong with you?” - “No…it’s just…you seem really hungry” - When he offers her the food, instead of immediately devouring it like she usually would she just - Stops and doubles back - Stares at the food in his hands, then at him, back at the food - “Are you serious?” - In that moment he realized what he’s done and gets all defensive - “Just eat it, Jess!” - “I’m just not that hungry, okay?” (*stomach growling noise*) - Then they are interrupted by Meowth - “What about me? I’m starvin’!” - In the end they just split it in three parts because sharing with them both is a bit less awkward to explain

- Also - In the beginning when they start falling for each other, Meowth would be oblivious by choice - As in he sees the signs but he ignores them because “nahhh no way” - Then when he figures it out he mercilessly teases James about having a crush on Jess every chance he gets - Though he’d do it without her hearing about it, because he isn’t THAT mean to him - But when they actually start dating he realizes he was a FOOL and now he has to deal with that forever - Like - He probably gave James advice out of pity - (James totally confides in him at some point because he just needs to talk to SOMEONE) - But then Jessie went for it and he realizes too late what that means for him - Now he needs to live with the consequences

- Meowth giving James love advice about Jessie though - That sounds like a huge train wreck - I mean he may tease him to no end but they’re still best friends so he’d still try to help when he realizes James is serious - “That dumbass really got it bad huh” - Deep down he does care for his friends after all - He’s like permanently done with James’ shit but he still keeps his secret - Although he can and will use his newly gained knowledge as blackmail whenever he wants something from him - And at the same time half of his “advice” consists of “lol Jessie’s gonna kill you” - “YOU’RE NOT HELPING MEOWTH” - James is already well aware of that - That’s his problem - He’s been faced with the full extent of Jessie’s wrath before - He knows better than to risk getting on her bad side

- On the other hand, it’s canon that when Jessie falls for someone she tends to actually act friendly and kind around them to some degree - Which I’m assuming is an instinctive reaction because she doesn’t want to scare them off - But falling for James would be weird since it’d trigger her instinct to be soft and good but at the same time - “No that’s James wtf” - She’s been treating him full force nasty for years and so far he hasn’t left so there’s really no need - Honestly James tends to get freaked out whenever she’s calm because a nice Jessie is just WRONG - Pure boy got so used to her mean antics he gets worried about her when she’s friendly to him - As a result, before admitting her feelings even to herself, Jessie would instead get MORE mean out of defiance - That darn Tsundere smh - She cares a lot about him but she cannot show weakness her mind won’t allow it - Nope - Fight me, feelings

- Vs Jessebelle, who is a Yandere and should be feared - And should also be decked in the face by Jessie tyvm - Imagine an actual Yandere Jessebelle tho - Nightmare fuel - I mean that whip scene was already terrifying - She broke a fucking dresser with the hit that was aimed at James - I know it was exaggerated cartoon violence but like she almost straight up murdered him - And his parents are okay with that?? - Because he’s too delinquent for her - So he can just die apparently - Now imagine her getting obsessed with him to the point of actively following him around to get him to marry her - And trying to get Jessie out of the way to get him back - Can I just say Horror AU right there - I’m an angst writer don’t test me - I like to take dark stuff and make it WORSE - Picture this - James coming back from a short trip to gather firewood or sth like that, only to find Jessie unconscious and bleeding from a stab wound - :) - Maybe Jessebelle is still standing there and laughing because she finally won - Of course she’ll survive but just BARELY - They’re in the middle of nowhere and James frantically tries to find someone to help her but they’re all alone - I mean after all that blasting off they probably know some basic first aid at least - He could stop the bleeding and then take her to a hospital with the hot air balloon - Cue that good ol’ “refusing to leave her bedside until she wakes up” cliché thing - But also imagine Jessie waking up in the hospital with James asleep next to her - Maybe even subconsciously holding her hand in his sleep - Because he was too worried about her and was probably talking to her before he ended up passing out from exhaustion

#separated into parts bc otherwise it would've been too much text #this baby is over 2000 words #and yes all of this was literally just one continuous conversation #and lemme tell you it was one of the best i've ever had #pokemon #team rocket #jessie and james #rocketshipping #kojimusa #headcanons #tr headcanons #mine