#rkchoisan

[rkyjun]

can’t get you out of my head... (a.k.a yeonjun is a sad lovesick puppy)

a lot has gone on in yeonjun's life. realistically, not much had gone if you were to look at this in a time perspective. however, it can mentally feel like a whole month has happened when it's probably only a few weeks. or even days.

that's how it feels like for him, anyways. his mind is a mess for one person and one person only. after that night of having kissed each other, it was easy to say that yeonjun hasn't been the same since then. in fact, if he had to be honest, the only thing—person in his mind right now was choi san. and he found it very irritating about that being the case. he didn't hate the fact that he was thinking about the fact that he was thinking of him. but after years of having not seen this boy, believing that he's gotten over his feelings that he had since high school, these thoughts were thrown back into his head. and all it does is make him more frustrated than he was before.

he doesn't like the fact that when he's not doing anything important, he finds himself drifting off to replay those memories in his head. he hates how when he tries his best to not think about the boy, the first thing that comes to his mind is his lips. how soft they were against his and how that night wasn't the first time he thought that. how back then, loving him was finding every single interaction precious to him and being able to be vulnerable with someone that wasn't his childhood friends. in fact, he think he's told more secrets to him than he has to despite the fact that they've known each other since soobin was in preschool and yeonjun was in kindergarten.

his crush on him felt as much fun as it did stressful. he remembers constantly thinking about whether or not the boy felt the same as he did. the two trusted each other with almost everything. yeonjun practically told this boy about all the problems he had at the time. if he were to ruin their friendship with that one little secret, it'd be over for him. fortunately, san felt the same for the other boy. unfortunately, college split them up. or, as yeonjun would like to phrase it, his parents split them up.

those first few years in snu were awful. not only was he pursuing a major that he had no interest for in the first place, but he was also missing a part of himself. the part that he gave to choi san all those years ago. no longer were they the friends they used to be, san now following his dreams in k-arts whilst yeonjun is forced to stick to his business major. of course, he manages to try to fill the void in his heart by continuing to talk to more people and trying to find ways to be happier, even though some of them were not the best. after december, he's tried his best to stay focused in school after months of extreme apathy to anything related to it. yet, he still finds his ways to eat fried food and also go to bustling places alone to try and fill the loneliness somehow.

and now the loneliness in him returns. and it was all his fault.

there was no other way of looking at it. yeonjun pushing san away whilst realizing that he was kissing the other was practically a parallel to yeonjun telling him about his parents making him to go to snu. it was a parallel to how after that incident, yeonjun did just what his father did back then to the poor boy. the look of hurt on his face was enough to haunt the boy's thoughts that he even thinks about it while enjoying a good box of fried chicken.

he feels a little bit better after going to jaebum about his issues. it was nice to get it off of his chest once in a while, especially to someone he knows he can trust. but there's still something in his head that he can't seem to get rid of.

so he tries his best to continue letting time go by slowly, his head full of nothing but that boy because he can't do anything about it.

perhaps, in a way, he deserves it.

it starts off harmless. like any other normal sleepover they've had in their past. yeonjun's almost certain that nothing grand would happen on video game night with his best friend. besides getting drunk and complaining about who's cheating, yeonjun expects for the night to normally as it usually does.

but, he should've known already from his past with the boy. when put together, they were unpredictable. not only to their classmates or friends, but to themselves as well. because the next thing he knows, he's waking up in his bed with a painful headache with no clue as to where choi san is. he was not in his room, nor was he in any other room in his house. it makes him question if the boy was even there in the first place.

yeonjun only knows that san was over after he gets ready and asks his mom to make hangover soup when he goes downstairs. amidst all the scolding of how he should not drink so much in order to live healthily, she mentions that san woke up pretty early and left while yeonjun was still asleep. it was another jab at his health: his sleeping habits this time.

he manages to pretend the only pain he's experiencing is his hangover. it's better than talking to his parents about his feelings over a boy. they wouldn't understand it. it'd just be another reason to look at their son in shame before comparing him to his better, superior brother.

he thankful he doesn't have classes today and over the fact that his parents are surprisingly not nagging at him about not going outside today. he's able to stay home and play video games as he always does. classic lazy yeonjun. as he returns to his room, he sends san a few texts to check if he's okay. if he's... fine.

( sms ⇢ ⛰shine ) hey!!! was wondering where you were bc i didn't see u leave ( sms ⇢ ⛰shine ) hope you're okay!! i know we drank a lot so i hope u were able 2 go home safe since it's a long ride

he debates whether he should talk about last night. because as he's sending these messages, the events that happened played in his head. the sweet kisses, the melting touches... just thinking about it all made yeonjun's face heat up. he wonders if he should bring it up. the last time something like that happened between them, yeonjun tried to ignore san for an entire week. of course, it wasn't because of that. but it was unfortunate with how the time played itself.

so he does. in the most subtle way possible.

( sms ⇢ ⛰shine ) thank u for last night

he clicks his phone off immediately as he anxiously waits for his response, getting flustered over how he sent that. he shouldn't be so freaked out over such a text. it wasn't anything bad. perhaps it was because of the context that he's feeling this way.

every notification sets him off for the next few hours. he wants to convince himself that san wasn't avoiding him because why would he? they're becoming the best friends they were before, right? the friends who relied on each other and always went to each other for everything? sure, they have grown up and matured, but they're still the same san and yeonjun they were before... right?

he finds himself disappointed with every notification that didn't come from "⛰shine". though he didn't mind the company of his other friends, he couldn't help but grow more and more upset with each message that came from everyone but him. a part of him even wonders if it's worth it to keep on trying. he didn't want to become miserable in his room all because he was waiting from a response from one person.

there was no read update. it's been hours. and nothing.

he tries not to think about it too much. the more he thinks, the more he finds himself slowly going into a mindset that he didn't enjoy being in at all.

it's hours later when yeonjun hears his notification bell and he hurriedly grabs his phone near his side as he's playing video games in the evening. even though he's been waiting to hear from him since the morning, he still is relieved over the fact that san got back to him. that there wasn't anything weird between both of them. that they were okay.

or so he thought.

( sms from ⛰shine ) yeah sorry i couldnt say goodbye had to head out early because of work ( sms from ⛰shine ) you too

yeonjun's face drops when he sees the word bubbles appear on his screen. he's surprised by how disappointing the response was, even though a part of him believes he deserves it. was that all san had to say about their hookup? is this the same boy that kissed him during that last sleepover? is this the same boy that was all flirtatious with him last night? yeonjun remembers even asking him throughout all of this if he wanted this to happen and he always said yes with the honesty that yeonjun could recognize immediately...

years ago, he said nothing about that night. should he have done the same? because either way, he feels the same type of shittiniess he felt back then.

the you too isn't specific enough. did he hope he was okay despite the hangover that would follow after? was it about him? nothing was clear to yeonjun anymore. his emotions were all over the place. he should be thankful that san at least replied to him... but with this?

he was tired. he wasn't even in the mood for video games anymore. he'd rather not stay up at night watching random tiktoks or going through his social media sites to pathetically think about how his life is lacking compared to everyone else. the time where he'd bother his friends with a bunch of messages to check on how they were doing don't even occur in yeonjun's mind now.

he's already had dinner. he already got what he was wasting all his energy for. yeonjun just wanted to sleep. sleep and not think about how his friendship with choi san was at stake for the night.

hopefully, tomorrow he won't stay in his head too much. but who knows if he'll follow through with that in the end?

#( * SOLO ) #yes i've had this tag before #rkchoisan #me before: wow why do i have so many sad songs in rkyjun's playlist #me now: this is fuel

[rksohee]

k.kjy:

it’s my cousin’s birthday today! i love you so much~~~ noona will always protect you ❤️ thank you for taking care of grandma when i’m too busy noona will treat you to a big dinner tonight, okay? [tagged: sanamoroll] ( @rkchoisan )

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#ig. #rkchoisan #(( him babie )) #(( sohee's babie ))

[rkpjs]

— humph! ;

#rkpicnic starter for @rkchoisan !

"damn it," pj muttered under his breath, taking a step back from the carnival booth. darts never were his thing, but for whatever reason he felt more annoyed that he was struggling to hit something as silly as balloons. "remind me what the point of this is again?" he asked, readying another dart as he tried to adjust his aim just right. this would be his time, he could feel it. the boy drew in a deep breath, lightly exhaling as he braced himself for the throw. then, he finally released the dart.

for a brief moment, it soared through the air, and pj watched helplessly as it bounced off of one of the balloons rather than popping it. "are you kidding me?" he pleaded to no one in particular, the stress he was feeling making its way into his words. pj let out an exaggerated groan as he buried his face into his hands. "i think... is this what death feels like? am i dying?" he asked dramatically as he fell to his knees, forcing himself to hold back laughter. "i can't die like this... san, please tell me i'm not the only one who's bad at these stupid darts. i don't know if i'd be able to live with myself."

#rkchoisan #humph; #rkpicnic

[mxnark]

supalonely

ft. @rkchoisan

mina didn’t use tiktok a lot. it was really just an app for her to use to look at funny, english tiktoks just because her humor was... different. when most of her childhood was watching american and canadian tv shows, it’s easy to reconnect with that sort of humor if there references to it in a lot of english-speaking memes (yes, she means shaggy from scooby doo). not only that, but tiktok and stan twitter was really the only way she could still keep in touch with speaking english, as she was sure she’s more fluent in it more than she is in korean. 

she does follow korean tiktokkers though. some of them were comedians, some of them were dancers, and the others were just... miscellaneous. basically, she has a lot going on her for you page. if she didn’t get on the app just to see her usual and maybe look on soobin’s account for a few minutes, she was finding new accounts to follow on her for you page. 

so when she looks up from her phone to see that there’s a face behind that counter that looks very similar to the one on her phone screen, she’s a bit surprised. it’s weird how these apps can make someone so recognizable in a notorious way. it makes her want to try and become someone on that instead of in real life, but she never does it. instead she finds herself nervously asking the barista in front of her a question after she orders her usual. “this is going to sound weird, but do you by any chance have a tiktok?” she asks before she shows him her phone. “i just saw you on my for you, haha.” 

#t; supalonely #rkchoisan

[rkwooyoung]

.right out of a fanfic

for @rkchoisan !

yibo’s seen a fair few handsome men in his life. he’s spent many hours online browsing pictures of timothee chalamet, has retweeted many a picture of hugo from per_se, but never has he seen such a beautiful man in person before. two tables away from him in the uni cafe, looking like he just walked out of a cloud dressed in silk robes with a gold leaf crown on is what yibo would call ‘his future husband’. 

the man, although dressed like a mere mortal, is undoubtably the prettiest man yibo’s likely ever seen. logically, in a situation like this, yibo would go up to him and try and start a conversation. but when, in yibo’s entire life, has he been logical? he’s lucky the man hasn’t noticed his constant staring yet, and he’s tried to pry his gaze away, but he’s just that beautiful. 

he’s on his feet before he can really think about what he’s planning to do, his take-away coffee cup, half empty and now lukewarm from how distracted he’d been, in his hand. he heads in the direction of the little counter with sugar and napkins on behind the man, and only notices how dumb this plan is when he’s already knocking right into the man’s shoulder and letting his cup drop right onto the man’s chest, where it bounces off and into his lap, before rolling off and landing, now empty, at their feet. 

he stands there in shocked silence for a second, realising he really did just do that, before, panicking, he grabs a handful of napkins from the counter now right beside him and starts patting the man’s chest and crotch. “i am so sorry! i- uh- i have a spare shirt in my bag i can give you!”

#;p #p;right out of a fanfic #rkchoisan #( 01 . 20 )

[rksohee]

aegyo master ;

DATE: May 29th - Aegyo 101

sohee had gone above and beyond to prep for this class. she would only have them for an hour on this one day but she wanted to make the hour special. there was a moment where she thought that maybe no one would come ( what a blow to self esteem that would have been ) but she knew they would never let her set up the class if that had been the case. she was excited to see who would come and how well they would absorb the material.

she had finished drawing a nice cute welcome message on the white board provided. she wouldn’t be using it much in the next hour since all of the work is “hands on”. she hums. students should be arriving any minute. the door was open and her smile was as wide as the flurry of nerves she felt. when she heard the first approach of footsteps towards the classroom she smiled.

“welcome! take a seat anywhere you’d li-- wait, sani?”

@rkchoisan

#rkchoisan #( aegyo master ; ) #rkspeakup

[rkwooyoung]

➟ RKBAZAAR : POP-UP FLEA MARKET

i love it when someone else pays full price first. - someone, somewhere

growing up, everything wooyoung wore was brand new. he hadn’t even heard of hand-me-downs or secondhand things until he was well into his school years. of course, he realised this wasn’t usual, and most people couldn’t afford to buy their children brand new things all the time, and he appreciated that his parents were able to. even now, at his big age of twenty, he’d still never bought anything secondhand, and wasn’t sure if he should. on one hand, it was better for the environment, but on the other hand, he’d be taking something for a small price, that he could buy full price, when someone else who might want it couldn’t afford full price. 

it was a terrible moral dilemma. 

even so, when he heard of the flea market he decided he really wanted to go and at least see what was there, even if he didn’t buy anything. with san in tow, so he didn’t get lonely, and because recently he’d been wanting to spend more and more time with the boy, he wandered through the flea market, a warm hot chocolate in hand and his eyes flitting excitedly from one stall to the next. 

to keep san close, wooyoung links his arm through his, tugging him over when something catches his eyes, and when he’s no being tugged somewhere else. after a while, and a few internal arguments, wooyoung finds himself carrying multiple bags of clothes, ranging from unique, fashionable pieces, to cosy, fluffy lounge wear that he was dying to get home and try on. 

after a while, he spots a stall selling what appears to be fleece animal hoodies. practically dragging san over, his eyes fall on the cat and dog hoodies. “i’m getting them for us.” he says, not even bothering to ask whether san wants a fleece cat hoodie or not - he will make him wear it. 

they’re going to be the cutest animal pals whether san likes it or not. 

#;solo #solo;rkbazaar #rkbazaar #( 03 . 20 ) #rkchoisan #wc:329

[rkyjun]

flashback friday

ft. @rkchoisan

time was something that yeonjun always found funny when it came to his life. in just a few months, it will be two years since he graduated from high school meaning two years since he lost his creative flame. at the same time, however, it doesn’t feel like that much time has passed. he still feels as if those events have happened only a few months ago, as well as the friendships he’s gained there. 

he still keeps in touch with some of his close friends from then, however the only ones he’s managed to contact frequently are the ones who go to snu. of course, it’s not like he doesn’t know what they’re up to. he manages to not only follow their instagrams but also their idol activities (for the ones that debuted into groups). some of them moved to farther places from where he lived and though he’s sad by it, he learns to move on. it’d probably be the best for him anyway, considering they’re out doing something they wanted to do while he was stuck being a failure.

he didn’t really have any business being on the other side of seoul. besides meeting his dad’s side of the family, yeonjun had nothing better to do with his time. he’s able to walk around in the city now because he was able to convince his dad that he wanted to go out and get some food for himself. and while some of that was true, he mainly used that excuse to get out of the situation quickly. that’s the only reason why he’s walking around the city staring at a bunch of different restaurants before his attention is directed to today’s buskers. 

and that’s when he notices him. 

he always enjoyed watching these performances while he was out. however, this time, his full attention was on this dance performance. and while this particular dancer was very charismatic, that wasn’t the main reason why he couldn’t take his eyes off of him. the longer he stares at him, the more he believes that he knows who this person is. and as the song had reached its end and everyone applauded them, he was at least 95% sure he knew who this person was, the other 5% being uncertain about it.

however, he decides to act on that 95% as he makes his way towards him. however, as he was doing this, the 5% starts to rise and the 95% decreases as he suddenly feels fear. there’s the likely chance that this guy doesn’t recognize you, despite the fact that you two were practically the bestest friends ever in high school. even if you two are close, what if you two are practically strangers now? with those thoughts in mind, he tries to settle for something in the middle. it’s familiar enough to call for his friend’s attention but also tests to see if he actually is who he thinks he is. that way, if he doesn’t react, yeonjun will confirm that he’s still a big idiot. 

“san?” 

#rkchoisan #t; flashback friday #(( pls don't match the length of this #idek why i made it so long i hate myself ))