#pretty sure ive posted about this before but wishjsbsja

[cosmic-d1ce]

I like to believe that q!Philza is very mentally ill and on the island he doesn't have his meds so it's much worse than it would be at home

And that's also why a lot of the time people, especially Fit, talk about him hallucinating and not knowing what's real or not. This happened with Cellbit the other day when they spoke about Wilbur, Cellbit didn't believe him because he has a tendency to mix up reality with fiction

This also gives Forever a leg to stand on when he says Phil is wrong about their "past" together. He can say Phil is just a bit delulu and people believe it because he is

From what I've seen everyone else is weirded out when weird things happen, but Phil just isn't?? Like when the admins would play cave noises to spook people, he just shrugs because it's normal for him. He's so used to just hallucinating all the time he doesn't give it a second thought

Same with the binary thing being Cucurucho for a minute when he got attacked with the eggs, he wasn't shocked or worried, he didn't look into it, he just went "Cucurucho- oh its the binary monster now" and he wasn't worried. Same with when the eggs turn into regular players, he laughs but he's not concerned, he knows (or at least thinks) it's not real

Even his first interaction with Cucurucho, he was surprised but not scared like a lot of others were because he didn't think it was real. He joked and didn't take it seriously until it hit him because then he realised Cucurucho was a real thing and he did have to answer the questions properly

He's usually good at telling hallucinations from reality and most of the time assumes that any fuckery is just his brain making things up. Sometimes though, especially on the island, he gets it wrong. He assumes fiction is reality and/or vice versa

I imagine sometimes he hallucinates the nightmare stalker and assumes it's real. Or even before that incident, he'd see the eyes and assume it was fake

He also obviously has PTSD, this island has fucked him (and everyone else) up. Especially the nightmare thing. I cannot be the only one that noticed how that changed the way he plays on qsmp completely

Plus his blurred sense of real or fake makes it hard for him to tell if his nightmares are real or not

#i like these hcs i like playing w characters w mental illness #and philza is very fun #qsmp #qsmp philza #philza #q!philza #cw mental illness #pretty sure ive posted about this before but wishjsbsja #its special to me