#personal bedroom etc and ik they were kids but it was like. insanely frustrating to have these kids who had like. never had to live without

[nomaishuttle]

i do fr need to work on differentiating between "actually middleclass" and "doesnt live paycheck to paycheck" lmao bc that is something i struggle with... obviously ik i have more in common with like. even somebody whos fr middleclass disney vacations every year. I know i have more in common with them than i do with bezos but god at least i dont have to see bezos being annoying in front of me every day KJANDJKLNLJD

#bc its like this. i obviously have way more contempt for a billionaire. obviously. but ive never met an actual billionaire yfm. and i Have #met middleclass ppl and A lot not all but a lot. are so insufferable and ikkkk not all of them or whatever but like. i constantly got shit #for being poor from middle class kids and like. ik im supposed to be class solidarity with them bc were all poor when compared to a #billionaire but goddd fucking damn they make it difficult . ik its like well the upperclass Wants the lowerclass and middleclass to be at #eachothers throats bc it means they dont pay attention to the upperclass walking over the both of them. i knowwww. but i can multitask #major in hating rich people minor in hating the middleclass... #THIS ISNT RLY RELATEDFTO THE LAST POST AT ALL i just have a lot of like. complicated feelings abt classism basicallyy. #like. i wouldnt wish poverty on anybody it fucking sucks. but as a kid i did sometimes fantasize abt swapping lives with my classmates who #had more money than me Not even bc i wanted to live their life but just so they would like. see the apartments i lived in and see the room #i shared with both of my siblings (weeman didnt exist yet lmao) and just like. look in the fridge. bc i just rly wanted ppl to get it lol.. #there was this one assignment that was like. wants vs needs and ppl kept putting needs as like. A big backyard. vacation once a year. my ow #personal bedroom etc and ik they were kids but it was like. insanely frustrating to have these kids who had like. never had to live without #Wants. yk. bc then i would just write down like. food. shelter. water. thats it lmao i even had clothes as a want instead of a need. and #they were making fun of me bc my list was so short and its like . look man i have gone without these three things on multiple occasions. yk #and now i try to be like. its good that there are ppl who have never experienced that i dont want ppl to have to experience that especially #like. that was in 4th grade lol. i was 9. i shouldnt have been worrying abt bills and stuff and none of my classmates knew anything abt tha #and thats a Good thing they shouldnt have. but theres this selfish part of me that wishes they did KANDJNS bc its so insanely isolating to #have ppl like. interrogating you abt why your shoes are so worndown or why your winter jacket is too small yk. and you cant say 'my family #cant afford better/new ones' bc they dont even understand what money is. yk. IDK. im just very sensitive abt these kinds of things KANDNW.. #perhaps a bit too oversensitive at times but yk. im working on it and im working on not being spiteful abt it bc like. yes it was isolating #but it was a good thing that the kids didnt relate to it yk. kids shouldnt relate to that and i shouldnt have felt that way bc no kid shoul #im also Ik i bring it up constantly but im still so mad abt that time my friends heard me say Yeah i have to go to court against my dad nex #wednesday . and they didnt say anything and then one of them went Ughhh my dad wont buy me the newest iphone hes buying me the newest #samsung instead But i have an iphone app that i spent 50 dollars on that wont transfer !!!!!! and then she endedup getting the iphone #anyways. sry ikk its grudge and i need to let it go but im still peeved... brinn there are people that are dying . #and also now i know that like. a lot of the other kids in my class Did understand and were just like. posturing. yk. a few of those kids #were from the same neighborhood as me lmao i was just too autistic to realize we werent supposed to be honest 💀 but yes. sry for this like #manifesto i am just thinking out loud..... well not bc this is text famously a written form of communication but we all understand. anyways