#one of her besties initially who has become one of mine tbh | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

bisluthq · 3 years

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Hey! I'm fairly new here and I have a pretty uncommon take on Kaylor. But I just wanna start off by saying I try my best to be as supportive of LGBT people as possible and if they're both bisexual, then I would be 100% okay with that! I'm not trying to "defend their heterosexuality" or anything, I think that's really weird

Okay, so my personal theory is that Kaylor did happen, but that Taylor and Karlie are both straight. I know that might sound contradictory, but I say this based on my own personal experiences based on how I am with my best friend. I think Karlie and Taylor's relationship might have been similar in some ways to ours

Right, so I'm straight and I'm not into women in the gay kind of way (but it's completely cool that some girls are), and I have this roommate who's gorgeous. Really gorgeous, she's like a 10/10 "I would sell my kidney to look like you" kind of girl. She's very attractive, she has like tan skin and long legs and gorgeous brown hair and pretty eyes and nice lips and just like… she's just very good looking. I'm definitely jealous of her body, I won't even pretend I'm not 😪 I lowkey hate her because of it (jk)

We've been living together since not long before COVID started, and we're very good friends. There were three of us before, but our other roommate went back home to stay with her parents until in person classes are back on and we agreed to it and worked something out because she has really bad anxiety so we understood her reasoning for it

Anyway so it's just been us two and because we've been at home a lot during this time instead of out for most of the day like before, we've gotten to know each other a lot better and have become a lot closer. We were already friends from before, but now we're like super close besties, we've been hanging out a lot together and playing board games, watching movies, helping each other with essays, just having long conversations about anything and everything, etc

Like it's been so nice having a best friend that I can be this close to now because I haven't had a best friend since I was a kid

So my friend and I were having like a conversation last year about how hard it's been in quarantine not being able to go on dates and how we miss kissing people, and so we decided to just like, make out for fun you know. I mean, there's not really anything that's inherently romantic or sexual about making out, that's just society that says that. But tbh I think making out with your friends if you want to should be normalized, it's fun and it can even be emotional sometimes. It's not that different from hugging people

After a couple of weeks or so, I think we got bored of just making out with each other and decided to like, fully hook up. It started off because we were modelling lingerie for each other for banter and were pretending we were each other's runway judges and then I think we just decided to hook up with each other as like part of the whole "game". I can't remember who initiated it now, I think it might have been me as a joke lol

Like just in a platonic way for fun, as a kind of substitute until we can go back into society

And tbh I always expected hooking up with a woman to be like mediocre and boring and awkward, but although it was a bit hard to get the hang of at first and there was a learning curve, it's actually very enjoyable. Like I was very surprised actually at how hot it can be, I think I can maybe see why bisexual women and lesbians like doing it

Anyway we both liked it and we just carried on hooking up on the regular and it's been like 8 months now and tbh I just think it's very sweet and heartwarming, like it actually makes me feel a little emotional how we're close enough and care about each other enough that we can even help each other out with the physical intimacy side of things so that we don't get sexually frustrated while we're stuck in lockdown

I just think it's really cool and we even sleep in the same bed most of the time now because tbh what's the point in sleeping alone when you can sleep in the same bed as someone else? It's nicer, like you can cuddle and stuff

Anyway, I think that maybe Kaylor's relationship might have been similar. I think they're both straight but they became really close friends in a short space of time, and that their friendship was so intense that it became physical but in a platonic way

I think lesbians and bisexual women are amazing and I have so much respect for you guys for accepting yourselves in a society that tries to erase you, and I think there definitely needs to be more wlw representation on TV and in movies

But at the same time, I would also like there to be more close female friendships like the one that me and my friend have where you can just talk about everything together and do things that society usually reserves for romantic partners, but in a platonic way. Because female friendship is really important and beautiful, whether that's between straight women like me and my friend who I think is probably straight too, or between queer women because one thing I've learnt during my short time on this blog is how queer women can have very close platonic friendships with other queer women too

I think society just has overly strict ideas of "straight" and "gay". Like for some people, they would hear about two women sleeping together and think "Oh that's gay", but not necessarily because straight women can enjoy sleeping with other women too, like it's normal 🤷‍♀️

I think it's just a result of women being a lot more physically beautiful than men are, like straight women really got the short end of the stick tbh compared to straight men

I also think it's because women are so oversexualized in the media, and obviously straight girls see that too and so we sort of internalize that attraction to women because we're so used to seeing women being presented in a sexual way? Except it's not real attraction with us like how it is for queer girls

Like I'm very much "attracted" to my friend, she's genuinely stunning and just very hot tbh. But I still identify as straight because it's just a case of what I mentioned above, it's a "fake" attraction. And also because men are afraid to compliment other men because it's seen as "gay", but women can be fully confident in their sexuality and still recognize other women's beauty and sex appeal. You see it all the time in instagram comments, and I really love how we're all so supportive of each other like that

Like I can be fully confident in my sexuality and yet still say that some women like my friend are gorgeous as hell and also 100 times better looking than most men I've seen. I'm very much obsessed with some women's appearances but in a platonic way

And I just love the concept of "girl crushes" and I think that from a feminism viewpoint, it's beautiful that we're focusing on other girls and showing love towards other girls too, instead of just to men who, let's be real, don't even fully appreciate it half of the time

I am going to be sad when we all have to return to life as usual and my friend and I won't be able to spend as much time together anymore. I'm dreading it tbh, I don't want it to end yet. And it really sucks that the physical side of our friendship will probably have to stop too once our other roommate comes back because I think she'd definitely misunderstand the situation and think it's something different than it actually is if she ever saw us kissing or something. I really am going to miss it a lot though, I really like how things currently are and it's just really really nice and I don't want it to change :/

Btw I'm sorry if I sounded fetishistic or offensive with any of this, I just get a bit jealous sometimes that you guys get to date girls and we're just stuck with men. Honestly if it wasn't for all of the homophobia and the struggles that you all have to face and the fact that it would feel disrespectful to the LGBT community, I would probably really wish I could change my sexuality to be bisexual or gay instead because I just think women are better. Sometimes I really do wish I was into women in that way because dating girls just sounds so much more appealing to me (in a non fetishizing weird way) but unfortunately I'm stuck with dating men 🤦‍♀️ But I also know I'm lucky and privileged to be straight even though most men are mediocre and kinda gross and I don't mean to be disrespectful because I know you all have to face homophobia and other LGBT difficulties and it really sucks, people are awful. There's nothing wrong with women dating women or men dating men at all, society is just ugly and bigoted

Anyway, does anybody else have a similar sort of take on Kaylor where they think they could have both been straight and just had a very close friendship with a physical side to it? I think it would explain a lot. But like I said, this is just a theory of mine based on my own situation, and I'm also open to the idea that it was an actual relationship and that they're both into women for real, not just fake "into women" like I am.

Also pls feel free to call me out if I accidentally said anything offensive towards LGBT people, I tried my best but if I made a mistake anywhere pls let me know and I'll avoid it next time!

You’re not offensive. Please stop apologizing. And we’re gonna come back to the Kaylor stuff another time because... Honey. You and I need to have a conversation for a bit.

So firstly, I’m not trying to like “diagnose” you and at the end of the day it’s your choice what you want to call yourself but... tbh you might not be straight. Sexuality is fluid not static and exists on a spectrum not in absolutes. It’s not like it’s straight, 50/50 bi, gay and you’re born knowing and there’s no room for anything else. That’s not true. There’s a lot of room in between all of these and labels can change over time. We’re people, not cereal brands, and sometimes we don’t even KNOW the word for what we might be. I’m tagging a tag for you from when we asked people to share their label journeys for you to see. It’s not simple or easy and it’s not just because of external stuff - it’s because figuring this out internally is HARD. If you found yourself having such an intense friendship it became physical, repeatedly, you liked it a lot, you still sleep in the same bed and continue to share all your thoughts and you don’t want any of that to end... I’m not sure you’re Kinsey 0. And I think you might lowkey have a girlfriend dude.

You can obviously prefer men but like... hun I reaaallly don’t think you’re completely straight.

Also: it’s okay to say “I see myself winding up with a man and this is a situationship for right now!” but that doesn’t make you straight because again, sexuality is a spectrum and you can manifest a particular kind of endgame while experiencing other things along the way.

But here’s where you really got me: “most men are mediocre and kinda gross” and “women being a lot more physically beautiful than men are, like straight women really got the short end of the stick tbh compared to straight men” because that’s the kind of thing I used to say in my Bi 1.0 era before I ID’d as a lesbian for a bit and before Harry Styles (KING 🥺) made me bi for real. Hun, no. Straight women like men. Tbh BI women like men. I genuinely, unironically, find Harry and Timmy and Matt Smith to be sexy beasts and I would do dirty things to the former two but maybe not the latter irl in 2021 but yes also him if I could be on that Spain trip with him and Karen where they got sloshed and which I think of often. These men are genuinely fucking beautiful to me in the same way Taylor is and Di Silvers is (okay she’s prettier than all of them but like same ~vibe) and like Megan Thee Stallion is and Indira Varma in everything but especially GOT and Gillian Anderson and Keira Knightley. Like those women are HOT to me and SO. ARE. THE. MEN.

Straight women find SO MANY DUDES hot. So many. Starting from objectively pretty options I just cannot personally understand like Chris Evans all the way through to bitches who are outchea simping for wrestlers and Cole Sprouse. Do I understand? No. But like... that’s straight girl culture and ours is not to judge.

If you’re struggling to find men hot then... you might be gay.

Also, I’m not sure what you mean by “fake attraction”. Like queer women - especially femme women which I assume you very much are - experience the same kinds of feelings straight girls do. We have women we want to be like and look like and find enviable (me and Oenone Forbat) and women we find aesthetically gorgeous (me and Anya Taylor Joy) and we have extremely close female friends who we can spend hours on end spilling our guts to - as you say female friendships are truly special - and without going into personal people that you don’t know, that’s me and Cam and Sim right? I literally talk to them for hours. Like those are not gay feelings. And yes we can chat about those kinds of feelings with straight girls and call them “girl crushes” and not immediately get “caught out” because they experience this exact shit too.

But here’s the thing. They never do and I don’t want in the cases above to fuck these women. It’s not sexual.

The moment I can actually imagine fucking the women in question that’s... gay.

Like it’s not “fake attraction” it’s literally just gay. That’s how we desire women. We want to fuck them. Not all women. Not always. But sometimes we want to get under or on top of one and just really truly fucking make each other moan with pleasure.

I have no idea if Karlie or Taylor are into women. They could both literally be straight. I have no idea.

But I have a better idea about you.

Hun, you’re fucking your roommate/best friend and don’t want to stop.

You’re not “into women”.

You’re into this woman.

And possibly into women more generally.

So I know it’s weird to have to be the one to tell you this, and if you want to keep chatting via anon or in my DMs or if you want me to try collate resources for you from around the web but...

Like.

Dude.

You’re a whole ass part of the rainbow.

Welcome to the community you thought you weren’t a part of earlier today 🌈 ❤️

It’s nice here, sure there’s homophobia, but at least we get to fuck girls and man is it good.

#agony aunat #share your label journey #roommate anon <3

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survivor-rebelsvsroyals · 4 years

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EPISODE 1-Well here the f*ck we are again! - Trace

As the game begins and everyone gets used to their new camps, personalities clash together. In the first challenge of the season, a mistake and a fumble causes Keaton a big loss but merges alliances together.

I want to die

ITS SO MUCH EASIER TO TALK TO SURVIVOR PEOPLE THAN BIG BROTHER PEOPLE. I’m in IHOS right now and they’re so overly dramatic, it’s not funny. I already feel good about this tribe- such cuties! Also, I hope I’m the first confessional.

I'm about to be devoured alive on this tribe. I don';t know anyone here. But I peep icons like RTP, Dana, and Ruthie on the other tribe

I don’t trust any of these people, HAHA. I am really excited though. Right now I’m trying to talk up Linus and Seamus because I don’t trust EITHER and I want to be in their good sides. I also want to get in good with Amanda and Pippa. I feel like Glo and I are good and I want to get a solid bond with RTP but... we’ll see! IM NOT putting all my eggs in one basket! On the plus side I think we have a real solid team! There are still a few people I need to talk to but... I’m being more social this season already than I’ve been on some of my others.. heh

lmao can i mutiny?? Earlier this year i had a falling out with some ex friends and one of them is in this game and the other one has a bestie thats in this game and honestly its exhausting. I wouldnt mind being here if they kept things game related but i know that they're going to make things personal and they're going to continue to spread lies about me.

tell me WHY my favorite person i have talked to so far (linus) is a STRAIGHT MAN. why am i hoe for the straight men. i have become the very thing i swore to destroy. i literally hate myself.

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As of right now, I want to do either paintball or bottles because I don't want to be the SOLE reason we lose in one of those individual challenges. Also, I think I'm pretty good at endurance challenges for paintball so it'll be fine. My tribemates seem to be an active, ok bunch. I like most of them. I'm getting really good vibes from Dan, Chloe, and Trace. They would be the people I'd add to an alliance. I haven't talked to LAchie or Kwaton yet so maybe they'll be my target if we lose. Nic is pretty cool. I think we'll get along well. Still trying to sus him out. Everyone else is just fine in my eyes. But they're all just obstacles in my way

*a little while later*

The tribe call was initially about the challenge, but now it has become something greater: an alliance. I always try to get alliances early within tribe calls. It makes the pre-merge a lot easier for me. I actually really enjoyed the company of John and Chloe. I didn't think I would, but here I am. If Brien was on a little longer then he would've been in it too. Oh well. Maybe he'll be in the next alliance I create.

*even later*

I really fucked that one up. Jesus christ. I did terrible. Hopefully my tribe can carry the other challenges because doing that badly is almost first boot worthy. Ugh I fucking hate myself

*the camera man keeps recording but is losing consciousness*

I truly do not know how my tribe can be this messy with challenges this early on. Keaton is seemingly going to fuck up the puzzle since he GAVE HIS LAPTOP AWAY. We're a mess. The first challenge isn't even done. Jesus, if we go to tribal, I am praying that they will not want me gone. It'd be terrible

I meant to send this last night but I think Ryan got himself out on purpose. Did he or did he not... that is the question! So I’m getting along really well with Linus, Amanda and Anabel at the moment. I love Glo but I feel like people will be down to vote her off if we lose. Hopefully my people winning the paintball match will mean all four of us will be safe but people are crazy so... we’ll see!

I'm kind of frustrated with my tribe right now. It seems like none of them know what they are doing in the challenge. "I can't find the puzzle." "I don't know the phrase." "What's the order?" Y'all should have figured this out a day ago. But whatever. I guess we'll lose and I'll have to cut out some weak links. I'm very over the absolute unprofessionalism of this tribe.

YAAAAAS I’m so happy we won the first immunity challenge. I’m pretty sure if our tribe loses then I’m going to be the first person to leave the game. Literally NO ONE is talking game with me, I even tried to form an alliance with Anabel today and she just like laughed it off fkfkfkfkfkf. IM SO FICKED

Well here the fuck we are again! The rebels tribe is cute tbh. I know Nic, we played together well in Chamonix. Lachie and I made it to the final of ILM a couple years ago. Chloe and I didn't work well together in Kuwait but we have a similar sense of humor so I have a good feeling about it. I hosted Dan and Keaton in MB and have good relationships with both. I don't know Brien but he already basically told me he has my back, and I do trust him even though he is a bit of an outcast. I don't really trust Raffy, he's kinda hard to talk to. Everyone else is basically irrelevant. I was so convinced that we were going to flop and flop HARD in the challenge, and we did. But at least Chloe, John, and I flopped the least and got us our one point. Now nobody can hold that against me! Tbh I wouldn't be mad sending Keaton out of the game. He's all over the place and didn't even compete in the challenge. So idk, we shall see. I feel pretty good about my place in the game but lord knows shit always hits the fan for me the second I have to talk strategy. So fingers crossed ladies!

We really got our asses handed to us HUH!? Honestly, I feel okay? I think I’ve chatted a bit with everyone and had meaningful convos, but that means nothing. I lost my wave so why should I feel super safe? I mean Keaton should be worried for sure, but I love him, so I’m just trying to see if there’s another option. I personally can’t fucking stand Raffy, BUT everyone seems to enjoy his twinky shady ass. Can’t relate!! I’m just gonna work on my growing bond with Asya and Nic and see where that takes me (: Here’s a list of who I trust from most to least so far!

1. Asya

2. Nic

3. Lachie

4. Trent

5. Chloe

6. Keaton

7. Brien

8. John

9. Raffy

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Losing the challenge sucks. Especially since we got stomped on. My target for this tribal is Trace. I don't really talk to him, and he just didn't do the challenge. That's a liability in my eyes. So, he has to go. However, I'm trying to avoid spreading his name so early until a few hours before tribal. People are being hesitant to throw out names because they don't want to be "That Guy." It's scary out here. I feel like I should be fine since I'm relatively social and active. Talking with people last night, I think I managed to make Trace an ally of mine. I suggested working together and he accepted. So, hopefully that pans out in the future. It just adds another person to my ranks. It's extremely important that I make these solid connections to protect me in case of a swap or once we get to merge.

I’m in rebels vs royals WHOO these royals are going down. We lost the first challenge but it’s okay it gives us time to trim the fat on the tribe and see where everyone stands. I like mostly everyone so far but I think it’s the honeymoon phase now and things will get real soon when we all ruthlessly target each other. I played with Keaton before and we agreed to have each other’s back and I would love to work with him for the long road and even be loyal to take him to the end with me even if I was definitely gonna lose. I’m trying to flip the way I play with friends and not be selfish and stick my neck out for them. It’s completely a transformation for me because my first season I betrayed my best friend cause I didn’t want to go to rocks but when I’m reality I was selfish. Raffy- seems cool but he is also a likable player that I have to have on my radar to not let get that far

John- I love John I know it’s early but if I had to pick my final 3 now it would be me him and Keaton. He might be playing me but he is just such a great person I hope we can work well in this game.

Aysa- Idk how I feel about her she seems nice however she also seems shady granted everyone is but I can’t let her get to far.

Lachie- my first target we don’t mesh well in our conversation and that’s a sign to me early on that we won’t work well in this game. He is my number one target at this first tribal we have to go to.

Trace- I like trace but he seems like a poser and I think he’ll say whatever he has to in order to finally snatch the win in his 8th time.

Nic- he is quiet but could also be deadly he was playing up that he hasn’t played in a while and doesn’t want to go first and I get that but i know it’s just a play for him to integrate himself in the tribe.

Chloe- she is nice but idk where she stands strategy wise but I like her and I can certainly see it being hard getting her out.

Dan- I almost forgot about dan he is so UTR I don’t trust him and if I can’t get lachie I would love to get him out at the first tribal. Now I know people have past season connections but I can’t really do much about it I just have to hope they implode on themselves and then I can find a crack within all the ruins. I’m certainly playing this game differently then before I’m gonna be as loyal and honest as I can and i know it’s a marathon not a sprint and I have to treat this game as such.

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I’m so glad to be safe this round! I fell asleep really early last night and I’m glad we aren’t on the chopping block because when I scramble I look like an egg head. I wonder who is going home on the other tribe hmmm

So.....I am ELIZA levels paranoid, even though it’s the first vote. Trace is my number 1 so far because we worked together in a previous game and he’s just cool. So I trust him. I also know Dan, but the way we left things in our last convo before the game was darksided...but we promised to work together this time. I am somewhat confident in that. I like Lachie a lot even though I don’t know him, and Brien seems like a strong player. I think this first vote is coming down to Keaton or Raffy. I am kinda wanting Keaton because I feel like Brien has him under his wing and if Keaton goes then Brien will be weaknened and maybe be easier to control? Keaton is saying Raffy is a strong player for some reason and we should get him out as soon as possible. So...idk. BUT...I am a paranoid mess, so this could all just be a big plot to get me out!!! Who knows??

Ok so basically I know almost everyone on both tribes which really fucking shocks me?! I was expecting to know like one person and then not be very invested but I was wrong luv. Because I’ve played with basically everyone before I like actually want to do well lmao, imagine me actually trying in a game. That being said I did so bad in the flag comp thing, I literally didn’t understand the rules at all whoops. She really thought it had to be all red, the only reason I didn’t draw it was because I was imagining having to fill in the background red after and I GAGGED. I luv Asya, trace and Nic. Last time I played with dan we both got to like final 7 but I barely spoke to him and I’m p sure he’s the reason why kate and I left. But I’ve been speaking to him more In this game and we have like A LOT in common. I’ve also been trying to talk to Chloe a lot because we played a Facebook game together once and she rlly thought I hated her and made so many vls about me, so I’m trying to like be more active in her pms.

A lot of people in this cast don't like me. Dan, Dane, Pippa. To name a few. With Dane it's very personal. He hurt me and I don't think he gets that I'm still super sad about it. We havent talked since March. We have so many inside jokes im reminded of and I laugh and I always just instantly wanna text him but I can't cause then I remember. I'm not going to throw his name out ever. If people come to me with it then yeah i'll do it. Anyway. I love RTP we've never really gotten to play together something always happens. Love Amanda. She's slaughtered me before but it's always been fun so I hope we can be an amazing team. I think shes still really good friends with Dan which might cause huge problems. Anyway later skater

oh shit a rat oh wait thats just my reflection hihi i was gonna do a video but i hate my face so we're typing today girls. so. i like my tribe!!!! i think everyone is like smart which is scary bc i have approximately 1 brain cell that i share w trent and it is VERY obvious that i am not in possession of said brain cell. i keep saying crackhead things to people and i dont know why, i guess im just on meth or something i dont know... maybe the ppl at my local ice cream joint(tm) slipped something into me bc i am in the mood to get WILD!!! i think as of rn i am ssn 90's sweetheart and everyone loves me and YES i am COCKY but i have a right to be bc i am fucking POPULAR!!!! my ranking is as follows, anyone who disagrees with me sucks ass.

1. linus 2. dane 3. amanda 4. seamus 5. ruthie 6. gloria 7. ryan m 8. ryan p 9. pippa

i will not explain these rankings bc i am right, u r wrong, shut the fuck up

Pippa doesn’t respond to me, feels bad man. Everyone else is pretty dope though, I’m definitely getting along with Anabel the best, she’s probably gonna win the game. Honestly the big story is just how Keaton’s opening was so cocky, yet called us cocky but then he abstained and likely will be first boot based on the abstain. Fantastic storyline making a full circle in the period of just 3 days. Sorry this is probably lame, I’m in a shitload of pain, I really just need to sneak by until I’m not suffering from my tonsil removal and then I can really tear things up. Oh, also Hoodie Ryan is the only epic gamer on my tribe so I hope he goes far so we can rise up together.

so far I am getting to know Seamus Pippa and Linus and other but dan;t think of their names lol. Had fun doing bottles challenge then messed up but our tribe rocks and we still won challenge. Where I stand I think I am liked by several so far. Wonder where it will go who knows <3 GLO <3

Am about to be first boot and I’m not even surprised lol xx

I’m just like an emotional wreck? Idk. I’m trying to keep plugging along but I have so much stuff taking up time in my personal life. Like rear ending a car tonight :~) soooo I think the vote is Keaton, but honestly who the fuck knows. Everyone could be pulling a fast one on me. I tried pitching an alliance with Asya, Chloe, and John but it went no where so look at me booboo the fool. I just feel like I don’t have much traction yet and I don’t wanna be caught off guard by a blindside tonight. I’m always just so paranoid at first tribal. Why didn’t we just kill the royals in the comp. fucking flop ass tribe.

Okay so THESE PEOPLE WANNA KILL ME. I thought I would be good with Chloe, Dan, and Trace but they all ran to the kingpin, Nic. I tried to throw Raffy under a bus, but Lachie and Asya protect, John didn't wanna talk, and Brien...I'm sorry Weber. You better fuckin kill it this game. Time to do what I do best though...cause an absolute shitton of chaos....for you Weber.

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