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xsixxx · 5 years

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Bad Influence, Chapter Eight

Authors note: Hiya guys, it's been a while 🤙🏻 Sorry for the wait, I've had a rough few weeks, so I took a break from a lot of stuff, Tumblr included, but I'm back & I've been working on this chapter piece by piece. It was originally supposed to be longer but I've decided to split it into two separate chapters, which means at least the first part of ch.9 is written!

Thank you all for baring with me, I'm sorry for the wait!

So on with the goddamn show 🤟🏻

Warnings: Language, sexual tension, love triangle awkwardness, Beth being a super slut, loads of angst

Tags: @triplehaitches @freddiessmallnipples @queen-crue @scarecrowmax @lovesick-heart0 @littlesunnymoon @80sheart-strings @cranberribread @inthebackofmycarlaytheirbodies @deaconsroger @zoenicoles @crazysaladchopshop @ggorehorror @lunamadhatter99 @justtryingtoovercome @chaoticvybe @you-know-im-a-dreamer @eightiesrockbaby @valentines-in-london @xrosegoldwolfx @fupatroopaa @lilypetite88 @this-blog-must-be-the-place @ashleecrue @lauravic @dark-princess99 @unknownoblivion @mgkobsessed @antheasnow

(I've given up trying to find matching GIFs for the chapter so here's one of Erin Moriarty who is legit Beth in my head)

*Beths POV*

I rolled out of my bed, pulling on a tshirt & yawning as I went. I glanced across at the naked rockstar, asleep in my bed, which had become quite a common occurrence since the KISS tour ended for Mötley.

Vinces blonde hair lay feathered around his sleeping features & I couldn’t help that girlish feeling of excitement & smugness in my stomach as it struck me, as it does every morning that I wake up next to Vince, that this beautiful man that women threw themselves at, wanted to be sharing my bed.

I smirked to myself as I slipped silently out of the room & made my way into the kitchen.

“Coffee?” Came the always chirpy voice of Tommy, who was grinning ear to ear as he stood in just his boxers in the midddle of the kitchen, changing the filter in the coffee machine. I eyed him up & down, trying to muffle my giggle at the sight of his long chicken legs in all their glory.

“Please.” I mused back to him, smiling.

“Good night?” He winked, catching sight of my yawn as I draped myself lazily against the wall.

"Probably about as good as yours from the sounds of it," I sniggered, "I thought we were having a competition at one point!"

Tommy let out a loud, hearty laugh that immediately made me giggle. His happiness was infectious.

He poured out the coffee into two mugs before sliding me a sly smile as he opened up one of the cupboards & produced a bottle of whiskey. "Fancy making it Irish?" He chuckled.

"Tommy, it's like 10am!" I laughed, shaking my head at him.

"So?! It'll get us in the mood for tonight! You're still coming, right?" He asked as he poured way more than a shot into each of the coffee mugs & handed one to me. I rolled my eyes at his offer of corruption, but my smile betrayed my & I took it from him, more than willingly.

"Of course, you really think Vince would let me miss it?!" I snorted, taking a sip of what was, let's face it, 1/3 whiskey with a coffee mixer. I tried my hardest to keep a straight face as the alcohol hit the back of my throat & immediately warmed my chest, chasing away any remnants of lathergy I might've had. "He's desperate to show off for me, it's been so long since I've seen you guys play!"

"He won't be the only one up there showing off for you." Tommy said, smirking behind his mug as he took an impressive gulp without so much as a blink.

I feigned innocence. "What, are you gonna twirl around your little sticks to try & impress me, T-Bone?" I winked, sticking out my tongue cheekily as he playfully nudge my shoulder, his laughter ringing around the kitchen once again.

"You wish girly," he sniggered. "You know who I'm talking about."

I pretended to rub my chin thoughtfully. "I didn't know Mick had a thing for me.."

Tommy let out another infectious laugh that instantly had me giggling along with me.

"So," he started as we both composed ourselves & I took another sip of my drink "Does Vince know what you & Nikki have been up to then then?" Tommy winked.

I nearly choked on my mouthful of whisky as I clamped my hand over Tommys mouth, peering out of the kitchen door to check we weren't in danger of being heard.

I removed my hand from Tommys mouth to reveal a grin behind it. "So it is true!"

"What, n-no!" I stumbled, knowing I wasn't fooling him, not even close. I relented, sighing as I did. "Goddamn it Sixx, can't keep his mouth shut.."

"Oh, Sixx didn't tell me." He smirked, "I see how you guys act, it's not hard to put the pieces together, you hate each other a little too much." He laughed, his grin growing wider. "I'm kinda surprised Vinny hasn't figured it out yet either.."

I scoffed. "If Vince ever noticed anything other than pussy or his fucking hair, then hell must be freezing over."

"Babe, if hell is freezing over, it's only because you've been warming the devil's bed." Tommy winked again, chuckling darkly as I took a swipe at his arm.

"Ok, well A," I started, as my hand caught him just below his shoulder sharply, wiping that grin off if his face. "I am not sleeping with Nikki! We kissed once! And B, how do you know I call him the devil?!" I asked sheepishly, my face flushing red with embarrassment.

Tommys mouth grew wide again as he rubbed his arm where I'd hit him. "Oh Sixx loves that shit, he brags about it all the time to us!" Sniggered T-Bone, before noticing my face & visibly grimacing. "I said too much again, didnt I? Beth, I'm sorry! He doesn't take the piss or anything," he rushed, stumbling over his words, "you just know him, that sorta shit builds up his ego, calling him the Devil is probably the biggest compliment you could give that twisted fucker!"

I groaned aloud as I downed the last of my whiskey with one swift gulp, hoping it might chase away my memory of the last 5 minutes.

"I can't believe you know!" I moaned, hanging my head.

"I can't believe you thought you guys were being subtle!"

"T-Bone, you gotta keep this to yourself ok? I like how things are with me & Vince right now, we're having fun & I kinda wanna keep it that way. And, for the love of God, don't tell Sophia. I can't be dealing with her disapproval on top of my dad's & my sister's right now." I finished, shaking my head. Tommy looked at me with that cute, dopey look that instinctively made me feel warm & trusting.

"I promise, I won't." He smiled affectionately. I could tell he meant it.

*Later*

*Nikkis POV*

I winked as I approached the gaggle of girls hanging around the door that lead to the backstage of the Whisky.

“Nikki, look for me in the front row.”

“Hey Nikki, cant wait to see the show tonight.”

“What are you doing afterwards Sixx?”

It was always the same. The girls always sounded the same, saying the same things, hoping to be the one to grab my attention that night. They were all starting to look the same too. The same hair, the same tight dresses, the same fake smile plastered on the same forgettable face.

Didn’t matter to me though. I fucking loved it.

I stopped next to them, leaning against the wall & flashing the arrogant smirk that never failed & I watched as they fell to pieces in front of me.

“So, what are you girls hanging around back here for?” I asked, making them giggle.

They babbled away, doing their best to impress me with their answers as I shut off, letting my eyes & my mind wander. I was halfway done mentally undressing them when a soft, flirty voice cut through the noise of the groupies.

“Hey rockstar, what’s a girl gotta do to get backstage?”

I turned my head, my eyes meeting with Beths before they trailed down every goddamn inch of her fine self. She was dressed in an oversized Led Zeppelin tshirt, tucked into a high waisted black denim mini skirt & white sneakers. She definitely wasn't like all the rest.

“Just show up looking like that, angel.” I smirked, not able to stop my eyes tracing her every curve. I strode towards Beth, leaving the wannabe groupies behind me without another word or thought, took her hand & lead her through the door.

“So when’s our next therapy session, Doc?” I mumbled, wrapping my arm around Beths waist, pulling her close as we walked.

Beth let out a forced laugh, wriggling away from me & glancing around quickly, checking we were alone. “Nikki, that night was purely for research purposes, we are not making that sharing circle a regular thing.” She said, her eyes darting around, looking anywhere but at me

“How about we just make the last part of our session a regular thing then?” I mumbled, placing my hands on her hips & pulling her into me once again, leaning my face towards hers, closing the gap between our lips.

Beth took a sharp step back & finally allowed her eyes to meet mine, a look on her face somewhere between panicked & scornful.

“What’s the matter, angel? Worried your boyfriend is going to see us?” I mocked, brashly reaching for her hand, but she snatched it away.

“Yes.” She snapped, before checking herself, blushing pink. “I mean, not that I think Vince is my boyfriend.. Obviously.” She stuttered as I let out an offhand chuckle.

“I should hope not.”

“And what’s that supposed to mean?!” Beth retorted, her whole body suddenly stiff & defensive.

“Calm down doll, I only meant that Vinny ain’t the dating kind, I don’t want you getting you hopes up.” I shrugged.

“I’m not one of those girl out there you know,” she gestured towards the door that lead to the faceless groupies. “I don’t crave this bands attention & I don’t need it. Maybe its me that wouldn’t date Vince, ever thought of that?!”

I raised my hands in surrender to her over-sensitive tirade. “That’s all good then, because Vince definitely isn’t gonna date you darlin’, so don’t get used to your sleepovers." I replied, a little too harshly as I let my jealousy seep into my words.

Beths face went dark & her usually soft features looked twisted & angry.

"What's with you tonight, I didn't realise it was possible for you be more of an asshole than normal." She barked.

"And I didn't realise it was possible for you to be more of a stuck up bitch, but I guess people can suprise you." I hurled back, irritated by her defensive attitude.

"Real fucking nice Sixx, thanks. And just when I was starting to think you weren't all bad after the other night.."

"Oh, so you do remember the other night?" I cut in sharply. "Because here's me thinking it must've all been in my head being as you've been doing everything in your power to avoid me since then & pretend like it didn't happen."

"Oh grow up Nikki, I haven't been avoiding you. I've been working & hanging out with Vince, I'm sorry I haven't had much chance to stroke your fucking ego for you."

"I could probably free up some of your time if I went & told Vince that little promise you made me the other night. What was it again? Something about making me kneel before you'?" I laughed smugly as Beth's eyes flashed with fury.

"Christ, you just can't stand the idea of someone turning you down, can you?"

I let out a dumbfounded laugh at her bold pretension. "Remind me Beth, when did you turn me down?. Was that before or after you asked me to kiss you? Or maybe when you were up on the kitchen counter, moaning into my mouth." I asked snidely.

She glowered at me. "What part of me still sleeping with Vince & refusing to kiss you just now makes you think that I'm interested in you?"

I was beginning grow infuriated with her condescension, how could she just pretend like the other night didn't mean shit? "Tell me, is Vince really that good in the sack?"

"And what's that got to do with anything?" Beth fired back, irritated.

"Must be a good fuck if you're willing to get attached to someone who's gonna drop you any day now." I shrugged, pretending I couldn't care less.

“So that's the plan, he gets bored of me & then what Nikki? I move on to you? You get to sleep with me & ‘fufil my dark fantasies’, twist me into someone as fucked up as you so you feel a little less alone?” She spat venomously, her voice cold & sharp, taking me by surprise. My body went rigid as I felt anger descend over me like a mist. Beths face flushed pale as mine turned red, but she remained stubborn, folding her arms across her chest defiantly.

“Fine, fuck off with Vince.” I seethed, my jaw clenched & my mind ablaze with the thought of Vinnys hands on her, touching her like I’d not been able to stop thinking about touching her since that night he first took her home. “He'll get bored of you soon enough, I know I already am.” I finished bluntly, fixing Beth with a stone cold glare before spinning around on my heels & marching towards the backstage door. I leaned through, deciding I’d pick the first one that looked at me.

A tall, slender brunette in a tight red dress with fake tits & that usual fake smile glanced round, her eyes brimming with excitement when she spotted me.

“It’s your lucky day darlin.” I cooed, taking her by the hand & pulling her through the doorway & away from her fake ass friends. Probably for the best, they’d all hate her now anyway.

I turned back to face Beth, smug smile at the ready, trying to think up a shit-eating remark to say as I walked past her, but she'd already disappeared.

Fuck.

"So rockstar, where's your dressing room?" The brunette asked, her fingers finding their way under my shirt to my chest as she draped herself seductively around my arm.

I looked at her with uninterested eyes, my mind still entirely too focused on Beth.

I guess I could use the distraction, I thought, taking the brunettes hand & leading her down the hall & into the dressing room, untying my leather pants as we went.

*Later*

“And where the fuck is Vince?!” I yelled at Mick & Tom, tapping my foot impatiently as we all waited to the side of the stage.

“Not sure,” Tommy lied, badly, “I’m sure he’ll be here in a sec.”

“Pretty sure he’s in the toilet.” Mick mumbled, without looking up from tuning his guitar. Tommy nudged him nervously, but Mick just grunted, flicking him the middle finger without a glance.

I watched from the sidelines as Beth & Vince emerged from the toilet together, giggling like goddamn school kids. White hot jealousy burned through me, flooding my veins as saw them, hand-in-hand, disheveled hair & satisfied smiles plastered on their smug faces.

"Nice of you to fucking join us." I spat as they strolled over to us at their own pace, still laughing.

"Oh come on Nikki, we ain't due to go in for another 15 minutes, chill out man." Vince shrugged unconcerned, fueling my outrage with his nonchalance.

"You might care more about getting your fucking dick wet than you do this band Vince, but this shit actually matters to the rest of us, so either change your attitude or you can get the fuck out." I seethed, my eyes flitting dangerously to Beth, who had taken a cautious step back from me.

"Sixx man, come on," Tommy said, gripping my shoulder, trying to diffuse the situation. "it's not a big deal, we don't need this shit before the show."

I took a steady breath, trying to regain control over my temper. "Just go & change before you make us any later," I hissed at Vince through gritted teeth.

Beth lingered awkwardly as Vince waltzed off to the dressing room, unsure whether to follow him, stick around or simply leave. I decided to help her along with her decision.

"I think it's best you go." I said to her coldly, my bitter jealousy plainly obvious as I turned around & marched towards the back exit, desperate for a smoke.

"Nikki, wait-" Beth called out, following me outside into the cool night air.

"What do you want Lizzy?" I snapped, sparking up my cigarette & taking a long, deep inhale. "I've got nothing to say to you."

"I'm sorry-", she started, but I immediately interrupted.

"For what?! For fucking Vince & almost derailing my show?!”

Beths eyes narrowed. "I was going to apologise for what I said earlier, but yanno what, fuck you." She fired back, defensively. "Why would I be sorry for doing whatever the fuck I want with Vince, it's not like its any of your damn business."

"My fucking band, my fucking business sweetheart." I seethed, taking another long drag through my gritted teeth.

"No Nikki, just because they're in your goddamn band, doesn't make any of those guys in there your property, you don't get to lord over them like you own them." She replied, feeling brave.

"And what about you, huh? I fucking made you into this over confident little groupie & frankly, you're getting a little bit too comfortable around here."

"Excuse me?!" Beth thundered, her whole demeanor changing, "you didn't make me into anything, you egotistical prick!'

I smirked arrogantly, knowing I'd got to her. "You come to my gigs to see my band, you fuck my front man, snort my drugs, party with my guys. Who were you before you met me? A stuck up little princess who didn't know how to have fun. Face it doll, I fucking made you." I scoffed as I watched Beth's face flush red with anger.

“And what about your new piece of ass, huh? You gonna make her too?” She snarled. “You’re pissed because I fucked Vince but you’re a goddamn hypocrite Nikki, I saw you with that girl, taking her into the dressing room. I'm guessing she didn't go in there to help you with your fucking makeup?"

I paused, caught off guard, not realising my plan to make her jealous had actually gone to fruition. I couldn’t stop the sly smile from creeping on to my face. “What does that have to do with anything?” I asked, my voice changing swiftly from enraged to calm & deadly smooth in an instant, enticed by her hint of jealousy & eager to hear her answer.

Beth squirmed a little, realising the corner she’d backed herself into. She looked deliciously trapped.

“I just-” she tripped over her words as she scrambled for an excuse. “I just don’t get it, why are you so pissed that I fucked Vince?” She asked, diverting the attention for herself.

“Because I want you.” I said plainly, switching gears, my anger melting away as I watched her discomfort double as she tried to stay mad.

“What?” She asked, shaking her head in annoyance.

“Because I want you Beth. I’ve wanted you since that night I caught you doing blow in the bathroom with Tommy, the night that Vinny took you home when it should've been me. I want you & I want to be the only one that gets to have you.” I replied bluntly, smirking as Beths mouth fell open a little.

“But you don’t.. You don’t do the whole exclusive thing.” She mumbled awkwardly, still processing my words.

“You’re right. See princess, I’m selfish like that.” I purred, taking one last drag on my cigerette before flicking it away & taking a step towards her so our bodies were practically touching. “I don’t like exclusivity, but also, I really don’t like to share.” I breathed, our lips practically touching.

Beth scowled, suddenly finding her voice. “Well that hardly seems fair. You expect me to be loyal to you whilst you fuck every woman that shows you some attention?!”

I chuckled darkly, knowing how unreasonable I was being. “Pretty much.”

“You’re such an egotistical asshole!” She yelled, raising her hands to shove me away from her, but I caught them by the wrists in one swift movement & pinned them by her shoulders. Beths delicate features were twisted, her perfectly shaped eyebrows were furrowed in anger & her soft pink lips were pulled into a tight, thin line as she fought against my grip. She glared at me, eyes dark & full of hostility. Yet I saw a lingering passion in them. Her tight lips relaxed for just a moment & I saw her drag her bottom lip through her teeth, those dark eyes darting to my mouth. I smirked.

"You’re right, I am an asshole. But you still want to kiss me, don’t you, angel?" I breathed, tightening my grip on her wrists, grinning wider at her mixture of discomfort & pleasure.

Her lips parted slightly & I could hear her breath quicken as I watched her internally fight with her desires whilst I fought with my own. On the surface, we hated each other. I hated everything she represented, the fact that she didn't like my music & how she was like every other girl, sucked in by Vince's blonde hair & boyish charm. She hated my arrogance, my runaway lifestyle & the fact that I could see right through her good girl act & get under her skin like no-one ever had. And yet somehow, that hatred had paved the way for an attraction neither of us could fathom or understand. It was illogical, unwise & entirely unwelcome. But it was also intense, salacious & completely overpowering. We both knew we'd have to give in to it eventually.

She kissed me, unable to restrain herself any longer. I released my grip on her wrists & buried my fingers in her hair, pulling her closer to me. She tasted so damn sweet.

I pulled Beths hair roughly, tilting her head & exposing her neck as I placed hungry kisses along her skin as she moaned aloud, pushing herself up against me. I placed my hands at the base of her pretty neck, running my thumb across the skin gently as I brought her lips back to mine, dragging her lower lip between my teeth. She groaned into my mouth, rubbing up against me as I squeezed my grip around her throat a little tighter, smirking against her kiss as I did.

She was fucking delectable.

Just then, the backdoor to the Whisky swung open, returning us from our heady escape back to the dingy alley with a crash.

"Nikki, come on man, I thought you-" Vince started to say, before catching sight of us jumping a mile apart in a failed attempt to look innocent.

I coughed, trying to regain composure. "Yeah yeah, I'm coming."

Vince's face was like thunder, a mixture of outrage and betrayal turning up a storm. "Nah, doesn't look like you got that far." He spat

"Vinny, I-" Beth stumbled, walking towards him.

His eyes shot from me to her, disgust adding to the mix of emotions he was displaying. "I haven't got nothing to say to you." He said harshly, cutting her off. "& You, brother," he drawled sarcastically, "get your ass inside, we've got a fucking show to play, remember? Or do you care more about getting your dick wet than this band?" He quoted, bitterly.

"Fuck you, Vinny." I shot, shoulder barging him as I shoved past to get through the door.

"Fuck me? Are you fucking kidding, Sixx?" He screeched, quick on my heels. "You're out there grinding on my fucking girl & you're acting like I'm the fucking problem here?"

"Your girl?" I laughed crudely, "Since when does Vince Neil have a girl?"

"You know damn well what I mean. I haven't been hooking up with her for this long for you to just go & help yourself." Vince snarled.

"Well maybe Beths got her reasons for looking elsewhere." I sneered, getting brave.

"And what the fuck is that supposed to mean?"

"Well Vinny," I started, taking a smug step towards him, getting in his face, "Maybe if you satisfied her, she wouldn't come to me."

"Shut the fuck up Sixx, you know that isn't true!" Beth yelled, pulling on Vinces arm in a feeble attempt to separate us.

"Why else would she come running to me right after you'd finished fucking? Your bathroom fuck clearly wasn't enough for her so she had to come looking for someone that could finish her off." I suggested arrogantly, smirking at my own maliciousness.

"Vince, just walk away." I heard Mick say from somewhere, right before Vinces fist flew at my face.

*Beths POV*

I sat at the bar, drinking away my humiliation as I watched the two guys I'd shamefully kissed in the space of 10 minutes, up on stage playing a visibly tense set. Nikkis angry red cheek was glowing like a beacon for the whole audience to see.

"It's not like you & Vince were anything serious." Sophia said, serving me up another shot of tequila. "I mean, that guy has definitely been screwing around since you guys first hooked up."

"I know & if he'd caught me with anyone else, I don't think it would be a big deal, but it definitely crosses the line to go with one of his band mates & best friends really, doesn't it?" I groaned, burying my face in my hands. "Plus, I'm not exactly a normal groupie, Vinny is my friend, we hang out, he spends the night.." I trailed off, knowing I'd just put a definitive end to that.

"Why were you kissing Nikki?!" Sophia asked, raising her eyebrow knowingly.

"Don't start Soph ok, I don't need it." I replied, necking the shot & gesturing for another. "Let me just bury my shame in peace & fucking tequila."

"I don't get it though, I thought you were liking things with Vince?"

"I was loving things with Vince, I don't know what the fuck I was doing." I sighed. "All I know is that Nikki has a direct line to both my last fucking nerve & my emotional g spot apparently. Who knew they were connected?" I groaned, mentally scolding myself for the millionth time.

"You gotta figure out what you want babe." Sophia said sternly, disapproval written all over her face. "But what you've gotta remember is, neither of these guys are in this for the long run, so are they really worth it?"

I fell silent, sparking up a cigarette & looking back across at the stage.

"I want you, I need you

I want you to be mine tonight.

You need me, you tease me

Use you up, throw you away."

I listened to Vince sing, watched him prancing around, his striking good looks & flamboyant attitude on stage so appealing it made me weak.

Then I looked across at Nikki, dark & brooding, the complete opposite of what I thought my type was. He was conceited & rude, his lifestyle & interests were the furthest thing from my own & he pissed me off like no-one ever had.

If I was being honest with myself, I'd say that, up until tonight, he was right; I'd thought myself above Nikki Sixx.

But tonight had changed everything.

Tonight I'd realised that I wasn't better than anyone else, I was just as bad. Worse, maybe.

I watched Nikki pluck away at the strings on his bass, enjoying the sound for the first time. I let my mind wander back to that night he said he should've taken me home. The same night he promised to drag me down with him.

He'd been right about everything. I wanted excitement in my life, I wanted to have fun. I wanted someone to fulfill my darkest desires. I wanted someone to show me how to enjoy the dark parts of me. And that just wasn't Vince.

I watched Nikki play intently, that spark of desire igniting inside me once again. I wanted him.

My bad influence.

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marshmallow-the-vampire-slayer · 6 years

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MTVS Epic Rewatch #208

Don’t forget to vote on the season 7 polls!!

BTVS 7x21 End of Days

Stray thoughts

1) So this is how Faith is doing as the leader…

…and this is how Buffy is doing as the outcast Slayer…

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm I wonder who’s the boss… (maybe we should ask Abed.)

2) I don’t like seeing Faith hurt, but I do get a very sick (I admit it) satisfaction at seeing all these girls hurt and scared because they kicked Buffy out and they screwed everything up in the worst possible fashion. I know that by having Faith lead them into yet another trap the writers were trying to prove the point that what happened at the vineyard could’ve happened to anyone and that it wasn’t Buffy’s fault (Buffy will make this same point herself later on the episode.) Both Buffy and Faith were trying to do what they thought was best, yet it backfired. Shit happens yada yada yada. Yet I just can’t help but feel personally vindicated when I see Faith and the potentials fuck everything up so spectacularly.

On the other hand, not only was Buffy able to pull herself together after the group (and her friends! Her family!) kicked her out and made her feel like the worst piece of shit in the whole world, but she also managed to A) get the scythe and B) make Caleb nervous, which was a first. So yeah. #teamBuffy

3) So why exactly were the Scoobies looking for Buffy? I mean, didn’t they kick her out literally the day before? And now they’re suddenly worried about her or something? The only person who followed Buffy after they all kicked her out was Faith. Faith! Do you see how wrong/ironic that this? Do you see how painful it must’ve been for Buffy not to have NONE OF HER FRIENDS – not Xander, not Willow, not Giles, not even her own sister! – go after her to see if she was okay? To ask her where she was going or what she was going to do? The only person who showed any concern whatsoever about her was probably the only person she would’ve labeled a potential enemy.

Damn you all, I’m still pissed off. I hate this. I hate having to feel this way about the characters I’ve loved for seven seasons in the FINAL EPISODES OF THE SHOW. It just feels so wrong, but I can’t help but HATE THEM. What the hell was this fucking writing choice? I hate it. I hate everything about it.

4) If I have to say something in favor of Kennedy is this, when shit hit the fan, she was the only one who wasn’t screaming like a moron and who was actually trying to fight off the Turok-Han. So yeah. The girl got spunk.

5) But she’s nothing compared to our designated BAMF.

6) No one is kicking Buffy out now, HUH? HUH???????????????????

Yes. Yes, you did.

8) And this is exactly why they shouldn’t have kicked her out or “rebelled” against her or whatever the fuck they thought they were doing.

BUFFY You guys, it was a trap. It's not her fault. That could've just as easily happened to me.

9) While I do appreciate the pun and the side glances between Buffy and Willow…

I still feel it’s very wrong they’re all just talking and Giles is playing around with the scythe as if the last time they’d been together they HADN’T HUMILIATED BUFFY AND KICKED HER OUT OF HER OWN FUCKING HOUSE???? LIKE SERIOUSLY??? In Willow’s own words, you're not gonna jokey-rhyme your way out of this one.

Like, I know the apocalypse takes precedence, but maybe say “sorry for kicking you out” and “thank you for saving us AGAIN”.

10)

11) Again, I get the same feeling with Xander. Like, did they all suddenly forget they had left Buffy alone and kicked her out of her own house? Xander is all like, “I don’t need you to protect me just because I lost an eye” but literally a day before he was telling her it was HER fault he’d lost it, and using that as a justification not only for removing her from her role as a leader but also TO KICK HER OUT OF HER OWN HOUSE. And now it’s just like nothing ever happened? How is that possible? How is literally no one apologizing to Buffy? And not only is he not apologizing, but Buffy is telling him that he’s her heart and the reason she’s still alive, which okay, it’s all kind of true, but he’s also the guy WHO BLAMED YOU FOR LOSING HIS EYE AND WHO KICKED YOU OUT OF YOUR OWN HOUSE THE DAY BEFORE?!

I didn’t know that End of Days could make me as angry as Empty Places but here I am.

We’re 14 minutes into the episode and still, no one has apologized to Buffy and they’re all pretending like they didn’t turn their backs on her and it’s pissing me off. I hate feeling this way in the episode prior to the series finale. This is not how a fan should be feeling right before the show ends!

12) Not only do I know what a glottal stop is but I’ve also learned how to pronounce it. Or at least I was able to pronounce it a few years ago.

13) And hence the fate of Miss Kitty Fantastico was finally revealed…

DAWN Xander, my crossbow is not out here. I told you, I don't leave crossbows around all willy-nilly. Not since that time with Miss Kitty Fantastico.

If you must hate Dawn, it should only be for this.

14) Did anyone really believe Xander would hurt Dawn?

15) What was the point of this scene…?

…I mean, other than to give us Nathan Fillion’s orgasm face?

16) And this is the difference between Buffy and the rest… just remember how everyone reacted and treated Buffy after the vineyard, and see how she acts here after literally the same happened with Faith in charge…

FAITH What do you want me to say? I blew it.

BUFFY You didn't blow it.

FAITH Tell that to—

BUFFY People die. You lead them into battle, they're gonna die. It doesn't matter how ready you are or how smart you are. War is about death. Needless, stupid death.

She’s understanding and reassuring, she’s not pointing fingers or kicking people out. And that’s why she’s a hero and the rest are a fucking bunch of morons. I’m sorry, I’m still so angry about Empty Places and this episode is not making things any better.

17) But I do love when my two slayers see eye to eye…

FAITH So, here's the laugh riot. My whole life I've been a loner.(…) No ties, no buddies, no relationships that lasted longer than... (…) Me, by myself all the time. I'm looking at you, everything you have, and, I don't know, jealous. Then there I am. Everybody's looking to me, trusting me to lead them, and I've never felt so alone in my entire life.

BUFFY Yeah.

FAITH And that's you every day, isn't it?

BUFFY I love my friends. I'm very grateful for them. But that's the price. Being a slayer.

FAITH There's only supposed to be one. Maybe that's why you and I can never get along. We're not supposed to exist together.

BUFFY Also, you went evil and were killing people.

FAITH Good point. Also a factor.

BUFFY But you're right. I mean, I... I guess everyone's alone. But being a slayer? There's a burden we can't share.

FAITH And no one else can feel it. Thank God we're hot chicks with superpowers.

BUFFY Takes the edge off.

FAITH Comforting.

BUFFY Mm-hmm.

This is something that had been a long time coming. Since day one, Faith had envied Buffy. Just like Buffy saw in Faith her road not taken, Faith saw in Buffy the life she could’ve had but didn’t. She envied it and she wanted it for herself. She literally tried to steal it away several times. So if she couldn’t have it, if it wasn’t meant for her, then she could take Buffy away from it, drive her to the dark side, where she lived. Every attempt was futile, even stealing Buffy’s body and literally taking her life. It only made her feel more undeserving, more inadequate, more unworthy. But every time she’d taken a shot at being the leader, it was by playing tricks, by taking what it wasn’t rightfully hers. This time around, she had somehow earned it. There was no foul play on her part. Others made the decision for her and gave her the role she’d craved for so long. And she finally understood that it wasn’t all it was cracked up to be. Yes, Buffy did have friends and people who looked up to her and cared about her. But when push comes to shove, when tough calls must be made, the Slayer is always alone. The weight of the world is only on her shoulders, and she can’t share the burden. It took four seasons but Faith finally got it. And she could finally let go of all the envy and jealousy.

18) I just love the fact that for the first time Buffy is the one who opens up to Spike. She’s always been the one who pretends there’s nothing between them and who skirts around her feelings and dismisses his. But not this time. And for me, it was enough that she acknowledged that it meant something, even if they – and we – don’t know exactly what that was.

BUFFY You're a dope.

SPIKE I'm a what?

BUFFY You're a dope. And a bonehead. And you're shirty.

SPIKE Have you gone completely carrot-top?

BUFFY Do you see this? This may actually help me fight my war. This might be the key to everything. And the reason I'm holding it is because of you. Because of the strength that you gave me last night. Look, I am tired of defensiveness and weird, mixed signals. You know, I have Faith for that. Let's just get to the truth here, OK? I don't know how you felt about last night, but I will not—

SPIKE Terrified.

BUFFY Of what?

SPIKE Last night was... God, I'm such a jerk. I can't do this.

BUFFY Spike...

SPIKE It was the best night of my life. If you poke fun at me, you bloody well better use that, 'cause I couldn't bear it. It may not mean that much to you, but—

BUFFY I just told you it did.

SPIKE Yeah... I hear you say it, but... I've lived for soddin' ever, Buffy. I've done everything. Done things with you I can't spell, but... I've never... been close... to anyone. Least of all, you. 'Til last night. All I did was... hold you, watch you sleep. And it was the best night of my life. So, yeah... I'm... terrified.

BUFFY You don't have to be.

SPIKE Were you there with me?

BUFFY I was.

SPIKE What does that mean?

BUFFY I don't know. Does it have to mean something?

SPIKE No. Not right now.

19) Update: 29 minutes in and I’m still waiting for someone to apologize to Buffy.

20) Am I the only who thinks this speech is okay but like, the writers were trying too hard to give Anya her “Anya Speech Moment” of the season and it kind of feels a bit, I don’t know, forced?

ANYA Well...I guess I was...kinda new to bein' around humans before. But now I've... seen a lot more, gotten to know people... seen what they're capable of, and... I guess I just realized...how amazingly screwed-up they all are. I mean really, really screwed-up in a monumental fashion. And they have no purpose that unites them, so they just drift around, blundering through life until they die...which they...they know is coming, yet every single one of them is surprised when it happens to them. They're incapable of thinking about what they want beyond the moment. They kill each other, which is clearly insane. And yet, here's the thing. When it's something that really matters, they fight. I mean, they're lame morons for fighting, but they do. They never... never quit. So I guess I will keep fighting, too.

21) #priorities

22) And in another episode of Plots Totally Pulled Out of the Writer’s Ass… (a.k.a. Joss Whedon Tries to Rectify the Fact that He Wrote a Bunch of Men Violating the Original Slayer by Putting a Demon Inside of Her and Thus Utterly Destroyed the Whole Slayerness Equals Feminism Theme)

WOMAN We forged it in secrecy and kept it hidden from the Shadow Men, who...

BUFFY Yeah. Met those guys. Didn't really care too much for 'em.

WOMAN Ahh, yes. Then you know. And they became the watchers. And the watchers watched the slayers. But we were watching them.

BUFFY Oh! So you're like... what are you?

WOMAN Guardians. Women who want to help and protect you. We forged this centuries ago, halfway around the world.

Okay, I get it, I get what you were trying to do, but it was so fucking obvious, it was so transparent. Like, I know most of the so-called metaphors in this show were not so subtle (think the fucking monster-penis in Doublemeat Palace, for instance.) But the feminist struggle in the slayer vs the council struggle was always something that I personally enjoyed. And this is how Joss’s brand of “feminism” began to crumble down, in my opinion. This is what a white dude who is a self-proclaimed feminist believes to be a Good feminist storyline, but it’s so clichéd and self-evident it's almost cringe-worthy. Like, you get a bunch of Evil Men quite literally raping a Poor Woman, who is faked Empowered (her powers were lent to her by the Evil Men and the source of her powers is Evil, Demonic in nature because duh! she is a Woman) so that they can Manipulate her and Use her for the benefit of the Patriarchy. But oh wait! This is a Feminist Show! So in spite of what the Evil Men who were supposedly the Powerful ones did, there always were These Great and Powerful Women behind it all, the True Guardians of the Slayer, This has been a Matriarchy all along, you see?! PLOT TWIST!

Yawn.

The worst part? I can imagine all the writers patting themselves on the back for writing such a groundbreaking and Feminist storyline and for sticking it to the Men.

23) And btw, just to show you how big a Feminist Show this is, we get this…

I guess since this is a Feminist Show and Angel is the hero here and Buffy the damsel in distress, that makes Angel a woman, right?

But hey, at least he (or she?) literally let Buffy deliver the lethal blow…

24) And yes, this totally makes sense!

because Angel has not claimed to be in love with Cordelia and Buffy has not just had her more honest heart-toheart with Spike. Let’s just disregard whatever arcs have been developed in both shows in order to deliver a Ship Moment for the Bangel fans, right? Who cares about character development, right? Because I’m positive this is what former lovers do after not seeing each other in over a year, being currently emotionally unavailable, and facing the greatest evil of all. Suck face.

25) Update: minute 42 and I’m STILL waiting for someone to apologize to Buffy.

26) Sorry for the bitter rant!

27) If you’ve got this far, thank you for reading! If you enjoy my recaps and my blog, please consider supporting it on ko-fi. Thanks!

#Buffy the Vampire Slayer #BTVS #Buffy Summers #Faith Lehane #The Chosen One #MTVSepicrewatch #mine #recap #End of Days #BTVSrewatch2015 #btvsrecap

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