#oh man the urge to make my blog themes modelled after saw rn

[tenpintsofsundrop]

I just watched the trailer for Saw X and I literally have tears in my eyes oh my fucking god.

I have said this before - and I know it might sound so weird to some people, but if you get it, then you fucking get it. But the Saw series, especially Saw III in particular, is the only piece of media that involves themes of 'medical horror' that has genuinely helped me get over my medical trauma and has helped me cope with my medical trauma.

Every other piece of media ever - not just horror media - from Grey's Anatomy to random thriller movies, to literally any horror movie with a medical themed environment, finds some way to trigger my medical trauma, because they paint illness in the most ableist way possible.

Hospitals are scary. Being sick is scary. And they use illness and sick people as a concept for horror without being empathetic towards them in anyway, or by magically curing their diseases in a convenient 45 minute episode (which would never happen in real life).

John Kramer is a character who flips the script on conventional ableism in medical based horror because he does something revolutionary - he showcases the horror from the perspective of the sick person.

And right from the moment I first got to see him in Saw II, giving speeches while coughing and having to ask someone else for a glass of water, tied to an IV pole (that was incorporated cleverly into the plot) - someone being the most menacing and powerful man in the room when he couldn't even stand, he instantly captured my attention as a horror villain for the ages.

Unlike Chucky, or Jason, or Freddy, or fucking Michael Myers - John is fragile. He died on screen and went through an entire detailed autopsy on screen. And yes, people are gonna make memes about how the producers are gonna squeeze the character's 'before death' era for all its worth, but I would much rather have flashback's that make sense (cough - fucking Jigsaw) rather than continually saying that the dead character 'somehow returned' just because the filmmakers want more money. Plus, they screwed themselves when they killed off the best apprentice early on instead of just handing the series over to her - as it should have been.

But anyway, my point is - John is a sick person. Having the series be from the perspective of a cancer patient is a radical act in my opinion. Everything from the symbolism of poisoning people to the fact that he is terrifying and controlling while dying in a hospital bed shifts the series from potential medical trauma to something that (personally for me) is healing when it comes to medical trauma.

So the fact that this new film is specifically about targeting a corrupt medical system (which some of the others have touched on, with having Lawrence and Lynn as trap victims and the entire insurance plot in Saw VI) - it gives me chills. I couldn't help but get genuine tears of joy while watching the trailer.

The idea that doctors will promise people happiness and healing and no delivery, steal their time and energy only for them to end up back at square one - it something I relate to so much, and I know seeing this film will be so cathartic for me. I am so excited for this that I could scream.

#NOBODY TALK TO ME #I'M SHIFTING INTO SAW MODE #oh man the urge to make my blog themes modelled after saw rn #ooof #sundrop speaks #saw #saw x #the saw franchise #the saw series