#no idea tbh my creative drive has been slaughtered lately

[strywoven]

quarterly check-in time ( + some house-keeping ) !  it is now the halfway mark of my semester and i am realizing how nanami ( jjk ) coded i am bc i - to the extreme - min-max my time to maximize my academic output.  work-life balance ?  not in this house ; only work.  as always , feel free to skip over this or read this at your leisure , but i will preface there’s a somewhat IMPORTANT note at the end.

i was invited to join symposium day in april.  which , again , is another major honor on my part , but i declined bc - full disclosure - i am not a man who does well with public speaking.  so , while i would’ve appreciated the accreditation of speaking , i also know that i would’ve stood at the podium , shook like a leaf and been so nervous that i made ( very bad ) jokes the entire presentation of my research projects OR i would’ve spoken so quietly they would’ve had to turn my mic ALL THE WAY UP bc no-one could hear my stupid ass as i mumbled through the whole thing.  the board member who was inviting me was like , “you know , i don’t think you give yourself enough credit” and i had to sit with that for a little while.

remember when i said i was accepted into the Psi Chi honors society ?  well , golly gee , there’s A FEE for membership !  how dare you want my time and my commitment and then demand my nonexistent money.  absolute malarkey.

in moral theology i want to report that whenever the prof brings up sociology and/or psychology , he IMMEDIATELY does the *pauses , looks at me in the front row* “... mav?”  IN LIKE.  the most expectant way.  bc he knows i have input on the subject.  i’m the resident nerd ig.  NOT LIKE I’M THE ONLY PSYCH MAJOR IN THAT CLASS BTW.  i’m just the only one with a big mouth.

i’ve noticed i have a rapport with several professors on-campus now … like , they will actually stop and wave to me when they see me or flag me down to talk to me and i *clenches fist* it makes me so happy.  it’s wild to come to the realization that these people genuinely GIVE A SHIT about me and how my education is going , i’ll say it.

as for my house-keeping tidbit : i cannot believe that i have to remind everyone about smth that is stated NUMEROUS TIMES in my rules , about smth that i make evident whenever we talk ooc - please , my compatriots in christ , COMMUNICATE .  in lieu of being hard-blocked by a now ex-mutual who i perceived as a ( good ) friend , over … i truly do not know what … i was so blindsided by this , i nearly deleted my blog out of shock and anxiety.  we are all adults , and none of us are mind-readers.  if ever there is a concern or smth you need to tell me , just do so !!  this is not meant as a vague , nor is meant to be a vent , but i do want to make clear that i am always open to being approached.  thank you.

#❧ ⸺ update | ooc ❞ #❧ ⸺ you’ve gone maverick‚ maverick ! | ooc ❞ #half way point let's go brothers #re the important note : just ... pls keep it in mind #anyways !! #spring break this upcoming week sooo... #shall we write ? shall we serve c*nt and do replies ? #no idea tbh my creative drive has been slaughtered lately #but i do always have motivation to plot