#no bc i love venti's personality so much he's so goofy and yet has so much on his shoulders

[chocoenvy]

Color me Blue

Vampire!reader x sagau!Tsaritsa(main) Venti, Zhongli (side)

part one

Notes: this makes no sense but it's just some archon/harbinger fluff bc i want it >:D

warnings: mild cult behaviors, fluff, somewhat romantic reader x tsaritsa, flirting

The cold snow of Snezhnaya couldn't dare to compare the sheer iciness of their Queen's eyes. The moment you laid your eyes on her, your entire being prickled with icicles. If you weren't careful you'd join the other lost objects in the snow.

The harbingers - who had led you to the throne room - left your side to join their Queen.

You had your own entourage, though you wouldn't exactly call it that. More like a few capable friends that could travel. It was only a few, not even half of the harbingers, but you were told it'd be unnecessary.

Your hands were sweaty through your gloves, your face heated from embarrassment as you merely stared at the Tsaritsa's admittedly beautiful eyes. You couldn't help glancing at Zhongli and Venti (both of which had insisted to come along despite their hidden archon status), did The Tsaritsa know who they were?

Sense kicked in after a moment of weakness and you lowered yourself to a bow, your lips parting to spout something formal, something you'd heard from a movie or a book before. You had no clue the correct customs but you could pretend and hope you wouldn't be faulted for such a short coming.

To your surprise, the exact opposite happened.

"Rise, your eminence," The Tsaritsa lifted her hand, an... oddly warm smile adorned her lips, "There is no need for formalities here."

You saw a flicker of fangs past her lips and you quietly gasped. You straightened your spine and took a bold step forward, grinning, "Thank you, your majesty, I'm honored. Though if there are no formalities here then I implore you to call me (Name)."

She hummed, a flicker of surprise shot past her eyes, gone as soon as it had appeared, "That's far too informal for someone as lowly as me to call you." Sarcasm dribbled from her words and you practically feel Zhongli bristling in anger, though you weren't bothered.

You put a hand to your chin in mock thought, still grinning ear-to-ear, "Then perhaps you should call me an informal title! Like dear! Or love-"

You were interrupted Childe erupting into laughter, along with a few of the other harbingers and a few of your "retainers". (It was Kazuha and Venti) Honestly though, you were surprised you weren't interrupted by Venti punching you or slapping your mouth shut. Though you supposed he was acting much more tame now that you were in The Tsaritsa's palace. He was just a "lowly bard" in the public's eyes, not to mention he and The Tsaritsa probably didn't have the best relationship considering she ghosted him.

"I never thought you to be so bold...dear," There was a playful glint in her eyes and in her fangs as the corners of her lips tugged upwards, "Then I suppose you'll have to call me a befitting name as well, won't you?" She tilted her head, almost mockingly.

You couldn't help the giggle that escaped your throat, just as you opened your mouth to retort with something stupid, you heard a groan.

"Stars above, get a room!" You recognized the monochrome haired woman with red x's for eyes.

Your laugh could only be described as an evil cackle, akin to a certain little red burny girl in Mondstadt after doing some absolutely heinous acts.

Zhongli was absolutely fuming, you swore you could almost see smoke coming out of his ears. You giggled and lightly smacked him arm, "Cheer up old man." He almost robotically switched up his expression at your words, "You want a nickname too?" You giggled, jokingly.

Zhongli lightheartedly glared at you, "With all due respect your grace, I'm okay." He pushed your hand off of him gently, though there was an amused glint in his eyes.

You giggled, "If you say so..."

You trailed off as you and Venti's eyes met. He clasped his arms around your neck to the point you were practically carrying him, "I'd like a nickname, your grace!"

You snickered at his antics, even more so when you saw how The Tsaritsa glowered down at the bard.

"What a cute little dog you have." The Tsaritsa gave a thin smile, "Perhaps you should teach it not to yap so much."

Venti merely kept grinning cheerfully at The Tsaritsa, though his grip on you ever so slightly tightened.

"Oh, sorry did I say dog? I meant bard."

She didn't mean bard. Though you found it more amusing than offensive. Perhaps you were stupid off the excitement, but all of your nervousness was evaporated at this point.

"The harshest words it seems, comes from the heart that bleeds." Venti smiled innocently.

The temperature in the room noticeably dropped, "A loud bard indeed." The Tsaritsa's gaze pierced deep into Venti's, though he was seemingly unphased. However if you paid close enough attention, you could almost feel a light gust of wind.

You roughly rubbed his head, messing up his hair affectionately, "Calm down, Venti. Last time you tried to have a rap battle with someone she beat you up."

Venti blinked and looked up at you incredulously, silently asking if you really just said that.

You patted his head, gentler this time.

*~

Things had calmed down significantly, and you were in a room with only the archons now, having some tea. Of course, with Zhongli and Venti being undercover you merely said that you chose two of your "retainers" to accompany you with your talk with the Tsaritsa.

"Morax, Benadryl," She hissed Venti's (incorrect) archon name, "It's been a while."

"That it has Miss Tootsie Pop!" Venti flopped down on a couch, taking up the entire space.

You unceremoniously snorted at their banter, "Seems you know who they both are." You mused.

"Considering the fact that I took their gnoses, of course I know them." The Tsaritsa elegantly sat down on a comfy couch, opposite Venti, her long and complex dress falling neatly around her.

"Still upset how my gnosis was taken." Venti pouted, already hanging upside down on the couch so you could sit next to him, "Seriously, Zhongli got to choose, Baal didn't even have her gnosis!" He groaned, "Couldn't you have been any nicer about it!"

The Tsaritsa crossed her legs and arms, an amused smile playing at her lips, "You wouldn't have given it up willingly."

"I might've!" He flailed his limbs comically, "You wouldn't have known, you beat me up as soon as you saw me!"

"I feel Rosalyne was justified in that scenario," The Tsaritsa put a hand on her cheek, "Mondstadt brings bad memories for her you know."

Venti huffed, crossing his arms, "Then why send her in the first place-"

"We didn't come here to bicker, especially in front of their greatness." Zhongli sipped at the tea that had been set out, "The tea is lovely by the way. I remember drinking the tea in Snezhnaya a very long time ago. Much has changed, but the tea is still as good as ever."

"Oh!" You perked up, "Just remembered!" You stood up excitedly, standing in front of the Tsaritsa. You pointed to your mouth, "You have fangs don't you?"

She blinked, surprised, "Ah, I do." She shuffled back, her eyes meeting yours coolly but if you weren't mistaken you could see a bit of embarasment.

You grinned, displaying your canines that were now elongating, "I do too! I'm a vampire!"

"Ah," She faintly smiled, shock coating her beautiful orbs, "I've heard a few things about their graciousness, however I was not aware of this." Her own fangs were on display with her smile.

"Wait- your fangs are bigger than mine!" You giggled, "That's not fair," You lightheartedly commented.

"Apologies your- oh should I be saying dear? I suppose you still have some catching up to do." She teasingly flashed her fangs with a grin.

You glared at her, "How hard do you bite? Where'd you even get those big of teeth from?" You unconsciously put your hand on her face to gently push back her upper lip, "I bet I could bite someone harder than you, or at least better. That's what I was made for after all." You hummed, "Perhaps we could test out our bites on something or someone!"

"Someone?" The Tsaritsa chuckled as you pulled your hand away from her mouth, "And who would be willing... well..." She covered her mouth with her hand in thought, "I'm sure Columbina wouldn't mind."

"I think she'd sooner bite me than I bite her," You chuckled nervously, "Maybe Arlecchino? I wouldn't feel too bad about biting her with all my strength, and I wouldn't fear for my life. Well, not as much as I would with Columbina."

The Tsaritsa

Meanwhile Venti was staring at the two of you, concern and uncertainty painting his features. On one hand, he wanted to offer himself for you to bite, but he did not want the Tsaritsa near him.

Zhongli saw Venti's frown and sighed, "Venti, if I were to give you some wine would you cheer up?"

He did, in fact, cheer up. However he was stuck on your back for the entirety of the night, even while you bit Arlecchino.

The Tsaritsa, sadly, had won.

"I don't get it!" You huffed, staring at the four angry red bite marks on Arlecchino that took over your bite with ease, "Compared to that my bite looks like a little dent! And I'm the vampire! Seriously your jaw unhinged what the hell!"

The Tsaritsa shrugged, a proud grin on her face.

Oddly it seemed that you and Arlecchino were the only ones with sour spirits. The other harbingers (Columbina specifically) were grinning ear to ear (and passing mora amongst themselves, the little bastards). While your "entourage" had somehow coalesced with the harbingers as well. You could've sworn you saw Kazuha give up a sack of mora to the tall dude with glasses. While Venti was drunkenly singing a song by Kazuha's side.

Half delirious and drunk off the atmosphere, in the end you all ended up listening to some of Zhongli's stories while slowly falling asleep (half of you were also tipsy somehow. You all blamed Venti in the morning for all the hangovers).

"By the way, Arlecchino." The woman looked at you curiously, a bandage around the shoulder you and the Tsaritsa had bitten, "Your blood is really tasty." You grinned.

She sighed, a slight red coating her cheeks, "Thank you I guess, your grace."

You yawned, slumping your head against the Tsaritsa's side, "Just call me... (Name)... Knave..."

You passed out before you heard her reply, or the end of Zhongli's story.

#do i like writing for the tsaritsa bc she has no canon personality and therefor cannot feel bad for making her ooc? #....no comment #snezhnaya was supposed to be like... the secret fourth option or whatever but #i could not help myself bc i just love the tsaritsa and the harbingers #its a problem i know #sagau #tsaritsa #venti #zhongli #self aware genshin #genshin cult au #it's the way i'm a sucker for venti #say my name part two coming soon istg #no bc i love venti's personality so much he's so goofy and yet has so much on his shoulders #I LOVE HIM OKAY SHUT UP