#n i was so stressed at that time w the future i rmber but ffxiv really slows down time for me and comforts me

[noxtivagus]

NIGHT IN THE BRUME

#🌙 rambles #[ ffxiv. ] #THIS MASTERPIECE. THIS SONG . it's so special to me #wait thinking abt it rn makes me feel like crying. night in the brume represents a lot of my emotions across time #i rmber when i finally reached ishgard way back in early 2021 i cried so much #n that meant so much to me bcs ffxiv really helped me be more open w my emotions again. it was so hard for me for the longest time #n i was so stressed at that time w the future i rmber but ffxiv really slows down time for me and comforts me #the feeling of success i felt when i reached that milestone in game. i finished arr. that meant so much to me #this melody brings back so much memories. it's safe enough for me that i can easily lose myself in it n be at peace #it reminds me of moments n late nights like these where i'm alone in my room w everyone else sleeping n there's just a light to my left #before i knew of emet's existence alphinaud/aymeric/haurchefant were my top 3 faves. all have connections w ishgard #listening to this song reminds me of all those moments as a sprout when i'd just chill in ishgard. or do msq. or wait in queue to level #times where i'd just happily take pics of my wol like i'm her mom or smth. posting on my priv twt. i was so young #i'd find peace and comfort in this little world in my video game. i was on free trial tho so i didn't play w any friends for so long #early months of summer soon i didn't know what i was doing. being stuck in the free trial reflected my own hopelessness w life in general #when finally buying the game tho i rmber logging into the inn of ishgard. i rmber going to ul'dah n finally being able to play w apollo #i rmber later on taking screenshots in ishgard as well n just relaxing. n night in the brume/solid wld play in the back #n it also just reminds me of a lot of things i've written. whether it be related to ishgard for example or while listening to the song #i rmber writing before abt imagining late night walks in ishgard while holding the hand of someone you love #imagine looking up at the beautiful night sky. it's a bit cold w the chill of the breeze but there's warmth w the person by your side #no responsibilities. deep talks or silence; whichever it may be it still gives you comfort. #looking back at my old notes my lore for my wol was 'in hw she learned to trust again' #oh god i already shed a few tears earlier but i feel like crying again bcs i still rmber writing these words so clearly #that was a time where i really really needed a long hug. n maybe rn i need that as well. #;;; i have notes on wolgraha here but for apollo's sake i'll change that to wol/oc omg #damn it's been nearly 2 whole years since i've (mostly consistently) written what happens nearly everyday #huh. 2022's nearly over n it scares me how fast time seems to pass by. remembering hurts so much but it also gives me sm comfort T_T #years months weeks days. sm changes so quickly. it hurts so much idk what to do abt it when there's nothing that cld console that #it's nearly 3 am tho i'll do a few things first then i'll head to sleep