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akwardlyuncool · 3 months

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Class Favorites: Movie Ranks! (Part 1)

This is a ranking of all the movies I saw for the first time in 2023. Since the writers and actors were on strike for a good chunk of he year, I only did one full length movie review in 2023. I was also a little burnt out from the last few years where I "made" myself write full reviews for almost every new movie I watched, so I took the strike as my okay to for the most partjust consume.

That freedom led me to watching 40+ "new" movies this year and I wanted to just come rank and rant at you for a minute. And thanks to very short mostly 1 lines on Letterboxed I don't have to rack my brain too hard. I will say though before we get too deep into the explainers, just know that a lot of how I ranked these films is based on re-watch-ability, so don't get mad that some of the better made films fell shorter than you'd like.

I decided to break it into 2 parts cause the post would be too long otherwise.

PS: Not in backwards order cause I can't be bothered.

1) Can't Hardly Wait (1998)

Let's wait 4 years to tell the girl you're in love with, that you love her, while the grad party before the rest of your lives takes place.

I know I'm behind on this one, but I made it and we're it's supposed to be lol. Yes, there are movies that I ranked higher than this one because they were probably just better overall movies, however good or decent 90's always shows my bias. But also Ethan Embry 😍. Can't Hardly Wait just fits with all the other classics of it's time and I think that's what ultimately does it justice. Obviously it didn't age great, I'm acknowledging it's faults, but neither did some of its peers and knowing where it came from we're letting that part slide. It is what it is with this one, sorry not sorry.

2) Alabama Moon (2009)

*Based on a book of the same name by Key Watt. Your father doesn't trust the rest of the world, so you learn to not trust it either and now that he's gone you have learn how to survive in the world outside of your woods.

Not 100% but I'm pretty sure this movie made me cry and that's partly why it made it to the top of the list. I'm a sucker for a spunky "family" movie and this one just tugged at me. There were some parts where it was a little silly in the "bad guy" area and I also called the ending "disingenuous" but all that aside, I was here for everything else. I probably liked it more than most but again I'm a sucker for a lot of this ish and it wasn't bad by my standards. It also does a little ACAB, which doesn't hurt lol.

3) Are You There God? It's Me Margaret. (2023)

*Based on a book of the same name by Judy Blume. When changes arise in Margaret's life, she starts talking to God to see if she can find the answers.

I read the book several years ago and had planned to re-read it before watching the movie, but didn't get around to doing that, so I can't remember if it was accurate to the source material or not, so going beyond that, I can say that I liked it. I liked how awkward and coming-of-age it was. I like the questioning and I liked all the prayer for the big and the small, to the silly and the honest. I also really loved the parents relationship, they were just super cute. There was a bit of confusion at the end with my understanding of the conclusions Margaret came to, however setting that aside, it was still rather sweet and would totally recommend to the young and the old.

4) Leap Year (2010)

When another year passes and your boyfriend has not proposed to you, you're obligated to take matters into your own hands and do the proposing yourself. Obviously like all romantic comedies, accidents will happen along the way.

Another one I'm late on, but y'all that was actually rather cute. It's one of those ones where you're not sure in the beginning and then it does the thing and drops the feels and you can't deny the fact that it did what it said it was going to do. It's a 2010 rom-com and I think it did that era justice.

5) A Guide To Recognizing Your Saints (2006)

*Based on an autobiographical book of the same name by Dito Montiel. Dito returns home after his mother's request because his father is sick and relives why he left in the first place. A bunch of kids who don't have much, but are fighting for what little they do have.

I thought this was a very decent movie. It kept me engaged and the acting was good. Now I never want to hear Channing Tatum shout racial and homophobic slurs ever again, but outside of that, for those into raw indie movies I think you'll like this one. It's good outweighs the bad. I'm not sure but I might have also cried a little during this one too. All I know is that it dug a little bit and that was enough for me. This is also one of the lesser known films for this cast, but worth the watch cause they got some strong folks in here and I don't think they'll disappoint you.

6) Runt (2018/2021)

When you're bullied, eventually, sometimes you fight back. TW: For violence, sexual violence and animal abuse.

I had a little moment of Cameron Boyce movies this year and of the few that I saw, Runt was the best one. This was his last movie before his passing and I could for sure see why people liked him so much. Cameron pulls you in and is so likeable. I know Cameron Boyce being in it wasn't enough for everybody, so do with that information what you will. Now beyond Boyce, this movie could have been better and more fleshed out, but I was for sure engaged in what I was watching and that was good enough on my end.

7) Mystery, Alaska (1999)

A small town in Alaska bets it's home town heroes against the New York Rangers.

I've watched the trailer for this movie in front of several VHS tapes for most of my life and because of that it was always on my to-watch list. Several years ago I found a sealed VHS copy and this year I finally unsealed the thing, because #NoSealedTapes. One thing to know about me is that I'm not big on sports unless you put it in a movie and preferably in the family movie era of the 80's, 90's and mid 2000's. So did it live up to the hype? Only once you take away the misogyny and leave the hockey and the underdog tale. Despite it's faults it did alright and plus I saw so much "crap" this year, that I'd take a few 90's misogynistic comments over some of the other, way more offensive things I consumed this year lol.

It also won me over because they were correcting people on not using the slur for Inuit people back before I knew it was even a slur. Like folks been tryin to tell us.

8) A Look Back: Dog Town & Z-Boys (2021)

A short documentary follow-up to the original documentary Dog Town and Z-Boys and it's impact.

This didn't rank higher mainly because it was less than a half an hour long. I love the original documentary and this addition brought attention to some of the things that I wondered about after seeing the full documentary, like the lack of girl skaters that were highlighted, so it just furthered the love. When the people involved also see falls and aren't denying them, I say that's a little stand-up-y and I support it. Now could they have just done better the first time, absolutely, but it is what it is. I also watched this during a re-watch of the Hollywood film which sparked me to watch other little skating docs on YouTube and I just gotta say, man do I love skateboarding culture!

9) Ashby (2015)

Ed Wallis has the high school assignment of interviewing an older person, so he chooses his ex CIA neighbor (didn't know that at the time) and stuff goes down.

I watched this on YouTube one night and it wasn't a waste of time. I gave a lot of 3 stars this year and this one truly was decent. It might have been a little far fetched in some places, but it really tried and I enjoyed it. Also father figures are all around us.

10) Keith (2008)

Popular vs unpopular, smart vs slacker. Rich vs poor. Let's pick on you because we like you. I just want to save you, but I don't know what from. A tale as old as time.

I thought I'd seen this one before, but apparently I hadn't. Well I've seen other iterations of the same story before, but no I had not seen Keith in particular. Yes there are so many other movies that tell the same tale, and came before and after this one, however as long as it makes an attempt at being decent I'm gonna watch it. Of course it does the feel-y thing and makes you root for the underdogs. It also gives does the thing where we want to chuck the current ideas about our future away. Oh and you're always saving someone lol. Essentially there have been plenty of movies post 2010 that do the same thing (I counted 6 in under a minute) and we've never turned away, so if you watched and remotely liked any of the "new" guys, you'll most likely enjoy the older stuff.

PS: I kept it a little vague only because I didn't want to spoil a big plot in the movie and the thing that makes it a common theme in teen movies today.

11) Blind Dating (2006)

Let's get literal and take a Blind man on blind dates. The dates aren't good, but that doesn't mean his hunt for love is over.

I'm not saying that the representation wasn't iffy or that it's not filled with ableism, but I can say that in the problematic era of 2006, I thought this romantic comedy was cute. There are better made movies, even on this list, but when I think about what would get the easiest of re-watches, this beat out a lot of the other ones. Sorry.

12) Whiplash (2014)

Andrew wants to be a drummer and he wants to learn from the best, but at what cost.

Obviously this was a prime example of a better made movie than some of the other films that proceeded it, however it didn't hit as hard as I would have liked it to. The day I watched it, there was a lot physically going on in the room, people moving in and out, talking about the movie, not about the movie, and that most likely soiled the viewing experience. Now I think it probably just needs a solid less-distraction filled re-watch because it was good in all of it's depiction of toxicity, it just didn't get a fair shot. Also I like the roles Miles Teller plays and he also needs more of a fair chance with this one.

13) Eagle Eye (2008)

The supposed sins of your identical twin brother get you mixed up with the Feds and a woman who you've never met, so now youre tied to her and his past, because of an all seeing AI woman.

This was my distraction movie the night that I watched it and I had been avoiding it because I knew that I didn't want to watch a military/war movie with everything going on, but somehow it's what I ended up choosing. The acting was good and the running and the car chases do keep one entertained, but not a movie I'd suggest you watch at this time, again with everything going on.

This was also another Cameron Boyce movie I knocked off this year. He's not the main character, like we don't see him a ton, but he was there so it counts lol and he did well.

14) Abducted: The Carlina White Story (2012)

*Based on a true story. Carlina was abducted as a baby and now as an adult finds out she might be a missing person and the woman who raised her isn't telling the truth.

First we support Keke Palmer in this house! Now that that's been addressed let's talk Lifetime/Straight to DVD Movies and how they're all rated on a curve. Even when these movies aren't that good, they keep me interested and I will always come back for more and that's how I watched 9 or so of them this year. The Carlina White Story was definitely the best one that I saw though. I gave it a three because it was decent and I enjoyed the performances. Obviously there was also conversation at my screen, which always helps these films. Yelling at the screen is half the fun. Although based on a true story, remember this is Hollywood and Lifetime, so do with that what you will.

15) Fun Sized (2012)

Change of plans, you can't go to the party you were invited to by your hot crush, because you now have to take your little brother out trick or treating and spend the night in charge of him. But hey, what could go wrong.

This was Nickelodeon/Paramount's take on the semi-raunchy teen party movie. I thought I had seen it before, but apparently I hadn't and I'll say that I didn't hate it. I think it would have given me more post high school feels of nostalgia had I actually watched it in 2012 and then did a re-watch now, but with the formula being mostly fill in the blank you're gonna get some of them regardless. Now although it was the funniest part of the whole movie and the part that isn't okay in real life, like don't do that ish, was taking an 8 year old to do illegal stuff, as a sad adult. I laughed, but again don't do that. Also I hope the kid who dressed up as Aaron Burr got to see Hamilton a few years later lol. It's another teen party rom-com in the list of other teen party rom-com's, so if that's your thing just go with with it.

I feel like any time I watch a Thomas Mann movie, I have to watch multiple, so I ended up watching 3 this year and this was my favorite.

16) Unaccompanied Minors (2006)

Stranded at the airport during the holidays, the kids who were riding solo decide to make friends with one another and mischief ensues.

Unaccompanied Minors is basically The Breakfast Club meets Home Alone, if both were set at the airport. It wasn't bad... It's a family movie with Grinch-type adults and kids who's goal is to be happy. If that's not your thing, I get it, but for those who do enjoy one of these films every now and again, you're gonna have a decent time.

17) The Pact (1999)

A teenage boy witnesses the murder of his parents and now must go into hiding. While in witness protection he makes a friend, but will his secret be kept for long.

I picked this tape up one day at the thrift store because it had Rider Strong in it. I thought it was going to be way more thriller-y and just overall hit harder, to the point where I thought it would trigger my anxiety, however it fell a little short of that expectation. I still gave it 3 stars for doing what it did, but it wasn't something I needed to be truly nervous about lol. The punch just really didn't hit hard enough.

18) Fight Club (1999)

*Based on the book of the same name by Chuck Palahnuiuk. I can't really talk about what Fight Club is actually about, so I'm just gonna talk about the vibes and some takeaways.

My nephew said this was his favorite movie, so I went and bought a VHS copy for him and we watched it one day. Now the reason that this movie is this far down is simply because I had so many thoughts after watching the movie but I still don't know what I was supposed to get out of it. What is the moral, what are we supposed to gain?

I read somewhere that if Tyler Durden (Brad Pitt's character) is your favorite character, like you want to be him, that's a red flag and I agree. You should not want to be him and if you do, seek help lol. The other red flag for me was the fact that in a section in the movie, I could potentially see how some men are convinced to join that alt-right and even hella far-right pipeline in the real world and it gave me all of the heebie-jeebies.

David Fincher who also directed The Panic Room, which I absolutely love, makes intense movies and Fight Club was no different, so it's not the fact that the movie wasn't made well, just that I was so uncomfortable and confused at times, that I don't know when I will ever subject myself to another watch. Not saying I'll never watch it again, I kinda even want to read the book with my nephew which is supposedly worse, just that it's gon be a minute, a very long minute lol.

19) Fifteen And Pregnant (1998)

* Based on a true story. When Tina Spangler gets pregnant at 14, she starts to realize that not everyone is gonna stick around and how much she actually has to show up in the world.

Again Lifetime movies are graded on a curve, so based on on that criteria alone, it was okay. That being said the movie was hella religiously conservative coded in terms of teen pregnancy and just like sex in general. I felt like it wanted to do sex education, but didn't lean hard enough into that desire because of how coded it was and that's what ultimately failed the telling of this story.

Also yes Tina is more than a little bit selfish. Not in the getting pregnant part, but in a lot of her attitude and the way she moves afterwards.

20) Emily & Tim (2015)

Emily and Tim's romantic relationship is being told through 6 acts with different actors representing their different stages, as well as different time periods.

The cast across the board is very wonderful and the movie itself had an interesting set up, but at the end of the day it was just alright. I think I had started this movie once before, but it didn't keep me engaged enough to see it through. This time however I pushed, probably in a few sessions for that same reason but I got to the end and that's the win here. This set up and the charm the movie does have, will definitely win some people over and if that's your thing, enjoy.

If you made it this far and are still into it, come back for part 2 as I finish out the rest of the movie rankings. Spoiler alert I watched one of the absolute worst movies in 2023 and now have 2 movies on my worst movies of all time list.

There's also more ACF 23 content to come, so be on the look out for that too.

#Class Favorites 2023 #AKWARD CLASS FAVORITES #Movies #Can't Hardly Wait #Leap Year #Fight Club #Whiplash #Runt #Mystery Alaska #Are You There God? It's Me Margaret #Thomas Mann #Cameron Boyce #Movie Reviews

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