#making them run the bleachers of life. till the earth etc. etc. etc.

[itspileofgoodthings]

as the anti-Helen of Troy my mission is to make the space where men are not something that can be so Fun and Safe.

#at the end of the day #it’s not the pining for the husband that gets me #it’s the missing the other girls when they begin to be romantical #(I know that isn’t a word) #(I mean it IS okay they always come back around and also it’s necessary) #but sometimes I do really know that my mission/ministry/jobs (that’s lofty language but…) #is to keep the feminine-specific place warm for the girls who don’t have anybody yet/for the girls who have someone to come in and out of #and like. i feel it so strongly that I can make it just as fun. and that I can make it something that is so safe #and I want to do that #like. the protectiveness I feel of the female heart #i can’t explain it but it is SO powerful. i am so protective of it #and I love men. and I love to think on the good ones and reflect and appreciate #but it’s not my ministry to do anything with them except teach them #until/if there is a husband #and it’s just like. he better be such a funny icon. because no way I’m letting anybody else into the rose garden space of the just for girls #actually he wouldn’t be allowed into that space either. but I’d come out occasionally just for him. and then start sort of a joint-garden #with him. #because tbh he should be someone who is taking care of men/leading them etc. #making them run the bleachers of life. till the earth etc. etc. etc. #and yes that is a Coach Taylor reference but that’s why I love him!!! #and that’s why he’s my husband #the ultimate complementary ministries #but like. he would KNOW on some level that my first loyalty is always to Women #in the sense of my work. but then he’d be my husband #Maria literally stop doodling on the whiteboard of life again challenge #but actually I won’t because it’s safe to do it here. i can’t say ALL of these things in person #so thanks for listening I’m sure it is confusing. but I am feeling a lot and reflecting a lot #and am very curious to see how things develop and grow #for me and what I want to do #anyway yes yes I’m being insufferable in some ways but also I just mean it all 100% lol