#like 6 orientation classes of work and now i finally got my syllabus and stuff

[dottores]

i’m officially settled in my apartment 😎

#it’s so hot the ac is getting installed tomorrow #also the cockroaches 🥲 they’ve been tiny so far but #knock on wood #they keep coming up through the drain if anyone has tips on how to deal with them #i would appreciate it 😭 #i have so much work for school to do now #like 6 orientation classes of work and now i finally got my syllabus and stuff #so i need to read over that #3/4 scenes done for heliotropes so this one should be on time but after this i’m likely going to switch to monthly updates bc i won’t be #able to keep up every other week with law school

[itsjayyyy]

August 17, 2019 4:01 pm

This will be yet another post in which I only write to map out my future goals, and refuse to actually update on the past (at least, the recent past) because I’m not ready to face my emotions yet. (Reminder for when I do write a real update: I need to go all the way back to july 25th, the week before finals).

Okay so today’s Saturday, tomorrow I close (and put in my two week’s notice!!! YEEHAW) and then the following week is the last week before the fall semester starts. I’ve REALLY been slacking on my studying. I separated my studying into two categories: the foundation exam (which is literally everything from comp sci 1) and extracurriculars (python, command line, autoCAD/solidworks/matlab, and how the hell github is used). I was supposed to balance between the two categories to not get bored, but since I only have one week before the foundation exam, I’m going to make that my #1 priority. 

I’ve realized that studying at home is just a bad idea, even at the dining room table. It’s just too tempting to go to the kitchen and overeat, or go back to my bedroom and stare at the mirror (not in a narcissistic way, I’m just like a cat or some shit, where I like staring at mirrors. It’s very easy to make me distracted with small gimmicks).  The library is open, even during breaks, from 7:30-5. On monday I need to go to campus to pick up my parking pass because I know that if I wait for the semester to start, the lines will be obnoxiously long. So from monday forward, I’ll be studying in the library that whole week. I plan on going in order of the comp sci 1 curriculum, but if I start to run out of time, I’ll start studying from the end because that’s the sections that I slacked off the most during the semester (although really, I must not have done TOO bad, since I still got a 95 on the final...). 

So tomorrow, before my shift starts, I’ll step into the manager’s office and give my two weeks notice (and I will NOT let them coerce me into staying, my answer is final). I’ll tell them that I’m quitting because I need to focus on school this semester, which they’ll understand; I’m the only full-time college student at my entire venue, and a lot of my coworkers are surprised that I’m working 3 days to begin with. This means that my last day at work will be the 30th (I requested the 31st off because of the foundation exam), which is a closing shift (how fitting...). The week after that is rush week for alpha kappa sigma and I’m so excited!!! Tuesday and thursday I might not be able to go because my object oriented programming class is from 6-7:15, but hopefully tuesday will just be like, syllabus day and I can run over to rush after. 

I’m gonna also try to join SEDS again, do the model rocket club that I would have done freshman year if I had enough ambition. I don’t know about coding clubs, I want to join one but I don’t know of any. To be honest, I think ASK is gonna be my main form of networking/experience, because it’s just so much easier to work in a group with other girls. 

One of my coworkers recently told me that I overthink, and make myself stressed out about things that I shouldn’t be stressed about. This was about the time I was a cook at cinnabon and we ran out of every product we had (and the freezer was broken, so we literally had nothing), but I feel that it also applies to college. I failed calc 2 the second time because I kept psyching myself out, and I need to be careful not to do that with the foundation exam. I get so caught up thinking, “oh my god, I need to study really hard or else I’ll fail” that my notes will literally have every minute piece of info remotely related to the topic, and I barely get through one topic (see my notes on dynamic memory allocation- three full notebook pages of notes, in my tiny ass handwriting, just to cover malloc and calloc). I need to find a balance between “let me copy the entire textbook word for word” and “I don’t need to take notes on any of this, I already know it.” Somewhere like “I have a general idea of this concept, so I don’t need to take notes on everything, just write a refresher and some small details I feel like I’ll forget.” Because I got a 95 on both the final and midterm exams, which is all of the material on the foundation exam. I only need to get a 60 on the foundation exam to pass, and it’s pass/fail, as in, getting a 61 is the exact same as getting a 100 (I mean, I can use a higher score as bragging rights, or bring it up an an internship interview to make up for my shoddy gpa, but that’s about it). So I need to stop stressing and just start studying. 

When I get my student refund, I’m first going to buy an office chair for my desk, so that I can study at home if I want. I feel like sitting at a real desk, and not a dining table or on my bed, will really make it easier to study. 

Anyways that’s pretty much all I have to say for now. Since tomorrow is a closing shift, I’m going to stay up tonight until at least midnight to make my sleep cycle proper. That’s roughly 7 hours I can study, so I hope to get through 2 of the remaining 11 units. Then, monday and tuesday I’ll try to wrap up the remaining 9 units (2 hours per unit seems fair), and wednesday through friday I’ll try doing the previous years’ exams to get a feel of the material. 

Oh, another thing I wanted to add: I think I might switch up my main blog style again. I mean, like I mentioned in a previous post here, I just don’t care about multifandom kpop any more, and even when it comes to bts I mainly use twitter to keep updated. Tbh I feel like I haven’t been honest to myself about who I am, and that’s simply a fuckin nerd. I mean, whenever I’ve been around rose, I’ve tried to be like her, ya know, going to clubs, doing ig baddie style makeup and stuff like that. Not that there’s anything wrong with that kind of stuff, but I’m just not an extrovert. I like playing video games on my computer, and coding, and even *gasp* watching anime. I feel like if I let myself enjoy activities that I actually enjoy, I’ll be more comfortable and able to make friends. Another thing to buy when I get my student refund: minecraft. And a raspberry pi. Plus, doing real activities like gaming and stuff would be a hell of a lot more productive than just laying in bed scrolling down reddit all day.