#just Cannot be arsed. he's living at the burger king for breakfast lunch and dinner

[talentforlying]

principal difference between hellblazer/nbc constantine and 2005 keanu constantine imo, besides keanu constantine being american, is their attitudes toward food.

hellblazer/nbc constantine: pub food and hearty shit, meat and potatoes and stews and fish. appreciates a good meal, the effort/time it takes to cook it, and the social rituals that revolve around it. also has a taste for the finer things in life and will scam his way into high-end restaurants to fuck around and embarrass everyone there while eating goooood keanu constantine: runs on dunkin, lox bagels, and not much else. cannot keep things in his fridge or they will rot before he remembers to eat them. obliterates a mcdonalds hash brown in a single bite

#( ooc. ) OUT OF CIGS. #i just can't see an american constantine giving a singular flying shit about home meals or the family values associated with it #just Cannot be arsed. he's living at the burger king for breakfast lunch and dinner #also i Want to say that keanu constantine is a new york boy born n raised but nah. in my soul i know his ass is from boston #he does Move to and Live in new york after his misadventures in LA tho #it's a big Historical Site which seems on par with london for the kind of sordid and bloody political ghosts it evokes #which is very important to constantine's view of the world and who he is as a person #his family is a line of blue collar dock workers and his dad lost an arm in an industrial accident (canon event) #i also simply ascribe to the notion that keanu constantine has fucking had it with the universe and checked out completely #which doesn't help. he saved everybody once and achieved salvation now he's just. there. existing. it's the worst #food / #food cw #food mention / #food mention cw #just in case #( headcanons. ) I'M JUST LIKE THE BASTARDS I'VE HATED ALL ME LIFE. #is this a headcanon or am i just talking out my ass? Yes