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deathbecomesnerds · 1 month

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The woman who emotionally and verbally abused me my entire childhood is in the hospital for heart failure.

It's weird when your abuser is dying...because on the one hand, I'm empathetic cause I'm sure it's scary.

But on the other hand...fuck you for everything you did to me growing up.

#personal #jolene: the satanic grandmother (epilouge)

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deathbecomesnerds · 3 years

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Rant Ahead. I just...I have to post this somewhere or I'm gonna fucking blow.

Jolene.

Ahhh...good ol' Jolene. If you're new here, and don't know who Jolene is, she is technically my grandmother on my mom's side--but because she's such a garbage human being, she doesn't even get the honor of being called a grandparent by me. Just Jolene. Her name. Which she fucking hates.

TODAY...is Mother's Day, obviously--but my mom doesn't like being showered in gifts and praise or flowers, she just likes to be with her kids. Cool. I've done the whole celebration she-bang for years and she always gets on me about it and this year, I just couldn't really be bothered to force myself to do it, so all my mom got was me. Which is all she really wanted, to spend time with me and my brothers--one of which didn't even bother to show today, but I digress. We ordered pizza. We talked. And my brother hurt himself working out recently, so we helped him out a little bit in getting comfortable.

Jolene lives with my mom. I show up, she stays and listens to whatever mom and I talk about for a tiny bit and then she goes and she hides herself in her room to try and make everybody feel bad that I 'scared her away' with my Liberal ideals and whatever other bull shit she cries about. She does this every time I come and visit my mom--and today was no exception.

However--I left after several hours of hanging out with my mom and my brother because I honestly needed to go get ready for the week. I told my mom we needed to catch the new Guy Ritchie movie, I love you, I'll see you later--XYZ. And because my mom makes me, I say 'goodbye' to Jolene. *eye roll* I was in the middle of something when just now, I get a barrage of messages from my brother--who tells me that Jolene is mad at my other brother and I for not doing anything for our mom for Mothers Day, and that we take advantage of her, and that we don't actually appreciate her.

This woman has called me a whore, a slut, an idiot, a communist, a degenerate--she comments and asks why I can't be like my twin cousins, she says that I cuss too much and that's why I will 'never find a man to marry me', I always have to watch what I say/think/enjoy because it might upset her--as if she's a fucking 3 year old. She has disrespected me and belittled, as well as emotionally and verbally abused me my entire fucking life. And everyone in my family, my own mother included, will GLADLY throw me under the bus to make Jolene happy. It's been going on for nearly 29 years.

I know what my mom does and doesn't want and/or like--so when I got that lovely barrage of messages from my brother, who because Jolene was angry, HE was...it really pissed me the fuck off. Because, it truly wasn't about what my mom wanted--it's about what Jolene wanted. Jolene wants to be worshipped. And while she kept getting calls from all of the family doing just that--I refuse to 'worship' a woman who has made my entire life thus far a literal living hell to the point where I've considered suicide if just to get away from that horrible human being.

It makes me angry that Jolene has decided to insert herself into something that was genuinely none of her fucking business, and I know for a fucking fact that when I go visit my mom next week or whenever I do have a second to go see her--Jolene is going to 'read me the right act' and quite frankly, no. I refuse to let this woman hurt me any more--I don't care that she lives with my mom, I don't care that she's my 'grandmother', I don't care--she is a hateful, spiteful person who isn't worth my energy or time, but for some reason, the family thinks I must put up with it.

I'm certain that I'm about to cause some family drama because I 'made grandma cry', but if I have to deal with emotional and verbal abuse for 29 years--she can deal with the consequences of her actions for 29 seconds.

Congratulations Jolene, you've finally kicked the Hornets Nest for the last time. I sure hope it was worth it, because when I'm done with you--there will be nothing left.

#personal #rant #jolene: the satanic grandmother #tw: suicide #tw: abuse

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deathbecomesnerds · 8 years

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You can tell me how I ‘can’t take a joke anymore’ all you want--but the second you involve Jolene into ANYTHING involving my livelihood--you better fucking believe I’m gonna get nasty real quick!

I don’t live with you anymore, so I can tell you whatever I want--and you threatened to bring Jolene into MY home for the sole purpose of ‘riling me up’...I will kill you.

You can’t hurt me anymore, and I certainly won’t let you!

#personal #rant #tw: emotional abuse #Jolene: the satanic grandmother #my mother: the equally satanic mother

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deathbecomesnerds · 8 years

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I have to put up with Jolene’s bull shit to watch POI, and she’s basically screaming about how sex and sexuality is evil and I’m trying so hard not to roll my eyes, or punch her in her ignorant, close minded face.

#personal #Jolene: the satanic grandmother

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deathbecomesnerds · 8 years

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It’s really fucking annoying when my mom comes into my room and tries to ‘chat’ with me.

Like--I’ve given up on you! All you do is degrade me and emotionally/verbally abuse me. You don’t get to know what’s going on in my life anymore. You lost that privilege when you let Jolene and Pamela take over 100% of your life!

#personal #my mother: the equally satanic mother #Jolene: The Satanic Grandmother

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deathbecomesnerds · 8 years

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Satan’s back...

#personal #Jolene: the satanic grandmother

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deathbecomesnerds · 8 years

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SHE'S FINALLY GONE!!!...

For a month. But I get my sanity and T.V back, so yay!!!

#personal #Jolene: the satanic grandmother

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deathbecomesnerds · 8 years

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AND mom throws me under the bus to make Jolene happy.

Awesome!

#personal #Jolene: the satanic grandmother #my mother: the equally satanic mother

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deathbecomesnerds · 8 years

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WOW...Jolene is not only a psycho but she is a fucking moron!

#personal #Jolene: the satanic grandmother

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deathbecomesnerds · 8 years

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I’m sorry...what!?

So you stepped on my cat and he cries out in pain--and you’re pissed off that instead of us (mom and I) being worried about how the cat scared you--we are worried about the cat WHO YOU STEPPED ON!!!

#personal #Jolene: The Satanic Grandmother #She's stepped on little Parker 5 times in 4 weeks #...she needs to go!

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deathbecomesnerds · 8 years

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Jolene riled me up on purpose about the weather, and now I have to take a Xanax before I have another panic attack and kill that cunt!

#personal #Jolene: the satanic grandmother #texas weather #do not like

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deathbecomesnerds · 8 years

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You sit in front of the TV all day with it on, but 90% of the time you aren’t even paying attention, you’re doing a fucking crossword puzzle or reading a stupid book.

But the second I take over the TV, you tune in and spent 2+ hours bitching about what I’m watching so that way I can leave and you can go back to just having control of the living room cause you’re fucking Satan!!!!

#personal #rant #Jolene: The Satanic Grandmother

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deathbecomesnerds · 8 years

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You’re a house guest...you don’t storm in, start barking orders and reorganizing my house as if this house was your own.

GET THE FUCK OUT!!!

#Jolene: the satanic grandmother #personal #I'm about to cut a bitch

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deathbecomesnerds · 8 years

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I am threatened by everything I do not understand...therefore, I shall hate it and bash people who do understand and enjoy it!

Jolene, about everything!