#it’s also why I’m like the worst when kane is gone or at nighttime

[whimsyprinx]

I feel bad that so much of my issue rn is that I’m lonely because I feel like I’m putting a burden on others in admitting this, but like yeah I’m so lonely and I’m worse for it because like I can’t do much about it

#whimsy whispers #I feel like I’m being selfish I feel like a burden I feel like I’m asking too much but like #I’m truly so lonely that I can barely cope and like there just #isn’t much someone who is alone can do about loneliness #I can’t spin it in a positive way I can’t be like wooo inlove solitude I hate it #it’s so very hard to cope with especially when I have to watch other people be close and happy and have people in their lives #people who seek them out and want their company #it hurts even more when those people are the ones who feel like they don’t want to spare a glance towards me #not to be immature and petty but this is a big part of why I’ve left like every single server I’m in #it hurts to see people be happy and friends and wanted and loved #it’s also why I’m like the worst when kane is gone or at nighttime #kane is actually home rn it’s jsut been a bad night ahhfjfk #but he’ll go to see his dad for a few days and I’ll be all alone again #this is all not helped by the fact that I like cannot cope with being alone #as mentioned before I spent a lot of my life growing up isolated from other people I didn’t have peers growing up for a long time #and now when I’m alone/left alone I panic #I’ll even make people eat with me because i don’t wanna be alone I hate being alone I rarely find any comfort in being left alone