#it is a sensible convo to have that does not drag on for a million years because adults can solve problems woooooooooooooooo

[poppyssupergirl]

Just Another Balcony Conversation

This is for Sol, one of my favoritest boobity boos, who donated to my ClexaCon fund (which you can also donate to, if you want your very own fic, just message me here on Tumblr). @thequeenofnationalcity  ‘s prompt was:

Hey, you don't ever have to do this but if you'd like to, could you write a fic for any supergirl ship where one person declares love and the other doesn't immediately steal them into a kiss, and they talk about it before finally having their first kiss? If you wanted. Thanks (this has a heart but Tumblr is trash and deletes everything after the little less-than-3 symbol so just imagine that there’s a heart here okay??)

Which was a really cool prompt and I enjoyed thinking it through! Thankies again, boobity boo, you are the bestest and I adore your entire being :3

And thank you to @the-queen-of-the-light for the beta, you a fab as all get out and I lurve your face!

If you’d rather read this over on AO3, that link is Here. 

There, it's out in the wind, off her chest. She feels lighter, broader, everything. The breeze blows her hair back and this warm night is perfect.

Cat blinks and sighs and it's not that Kara expected her to leap off the balcony and into her arms but… she'd seen the signs. Cat loves her. This resigned sigh and Cat backing away from her, backing away until she's collapsing on the lounger behind her, is not what Kara'd hoped for.

It's confusing and Kara frowns as she hovers just beyond the balcony. She knows Cat, knows her tells, and right now everything reads ‘fatigue’. But Kara feels light and energized, why would Cat be tired? They love each other, it's obvious… isn't it?

“I know.” It's another sigh and that only adds to Kara's confusion.

“You know?” She blinks and frowns. “Why didn't you-?”

Cat hums and presses her whiskey glass between her hands. “Why didn't I say anything?”

Kara nods, rests her hands on the balcony so she can hold onto something.

“Because I thought it was just an infatuation.”

And that's not it, her feelings aren't some fleeting- it's been three years. Two years since Supergirl made an appearance. Less than a year since she donned her cape in Cat's presence.

She opens her mouth but Cat's raised hand stops her.

“I know- I know it's not an infatuation.” And she stops there and looks at her glass but she doesn't rise to fill it. “That you're serious, but Kara, that's even worse.”

Nothing makes sense. It's like she's learning English all over again and Cat has an accent she's never heard before. The concrete under her hands creaks and she breathes out much too harshly. “Why?”

Cat laughs. Laughs a short, bitter thing and gestures between the two of them. “How could this ever work? We're too different; my cynicism would whittle away at your hope and you'd-”

“Cat.” She's furious. Her face feels hot, the concrete beneath her fingers trembles. “Do not put words into my mouth. Do not guess at my intentions. You want cynicism?” She stops and stares at Cat.

But Cat says nothing. The only tells that she's listening are the twitch of her brow and her unwavering stare.

“What about a dead planet, Cat? What about going every day wondering if everyone I love will be taken from me just because I wear this cape?” She floats up and over the railing. She won't be at a lower height than Cat for this.

“What about the absolute knowledge that, if I am not killed in battle, I will outlive every human who walks this Earth right now?” She feels like shouting, like screaming, because all of this has lived in her for over a decade and Cat's ignoring it for excuses. “What about the fact that there's no one left who shares my culture, that when I die, there will be no one to send me to Rao.”

Her mind works so much faster, she's already thought of all of this through. “Is that enough cynicism for you, Cat?” She doesn't lean into Cat's space, it's not a threat. She's just so angry.

Cat nods but holds her gaze. “Fair. But I'm not easy to lov-”

“You think I don't know that? You think I don't know how stubborn and downright mean you can be?” Kara throws her head back and laughs and Cat stands with a frown. But suddenly Kara isn't angry anymore. They need to talk, they need this. “Cat I've loved you for three years, even after being your assistant.”

That stops Cat. Stops her forward step, makes her blinks, and oh, she didn't know. But how? How could she not know how long Kara's loved her?

“Cat, I didn't say you were perfect. I said “I love you”. That's not going to change anytime soon.” She shifts her weight forward, but doesn't take a step. “Besides, I'm just as hard to love when you can see my bad days too.”

The lines in Cat's face pop and Kara reads ‘worry’. “Bad days? Like the red-”

Kara’s already shaking her head before Cat can finish. “Those are bad days, but not what I'm talking about.” She pauses and listens to the traffic far below, narrows in on a woman chatting with her girlfriend.

“I mean the days where I can't filter out the noise and light. Where I can't save everyone. Where knowing I'll be alone, eventually, is too much.” She bites her cheek, ending the spill of words she hasn’t even said to Alex yet.

Cat doesn’t say anything and Kara isn’t looking at her. She’s still focusing on the street below, the pool of air in Cat’s lungs too much right now. She wants to make Cat understand. They’ll be good together, that’s already been proven. They’ve sat together on late nights, they’ve built Supergirl, and Rao above, they’ve saved the world multiple times.

Their past interactions don’t assure a good relationship, Kara knows that. But if they aren’t a good indication of a positive outcome, then nothing is.

Cat clears her throat and that pulls Kara’s attention back to the balcony. “I may… not have given you my best reasons first.” She sighs and pulls in a deeper breath, Kara holds her own, silently. “I’m a lot older than you-”

Kara opens her mouth but Cat holds up her hand. “And that brings a different view on life and the world. We won’t agree on everything, obviously. Relationships are hard, as you know, and not a single thing comes easy.” She pushes out a loud breath, almost a laugh. “Not even breakfast choices.”

She’s not done, so Kara doesn’t interrupt. “I have two children who I will, without a shadow of a doubt, always put first. If they have issues with us being together that we can’t work out…” She frowns and Kara nods. That was never in question.

“And you have friends who will do their best to talk you out of this.” Again, Kara’s stopped from rescinding by Cat’s raised hand. “As my friends will try the same. Most likely, no one we know will be approving of this, not even to mention what the media will say.”

“We both have responsibilities that are bigger than ourselves or those around us. We’ll both be working ridiculous hours and a relationship needs time to be successful.” Cat stops and breathes out. “Press Secretary isn't a plush job and neither is Superhero-ing.”

She looks up at Kara, fully meeting her gaze. “Those are only the obvious downsides. There are, of course, the things we don't know about each other that may clash.” She steps forward and Kara leans back just a tad. “You have days where being a Superhero isn't going to be good. We both have baggage that could kill any horse and I could go on and on about how poorly our wardrobes work together.”

There's that smirk again. It pulls a tiny smile from Kara too. But both their smiles are fleeting in the reality Cat's presented.

“That being said... “ Cat trails off, dropping eye contact, and her heartbeat skips. She presses her palm to her pants and flips her other hand in front of her. “There are upsides to relationships and I would be willing to hear any rebuttals you may wish to voice now.”

Kara smiles and nods. She doesn't answer immediately, but she already has her arguments planned out. She's still kind of reeling how much thought Cat’s put into it all of this, into them. Though… she always thinks the situation through, perhaps she shouldn’t be surprised at all.

“Your age doesn't matter.” She starts and Cat's eyes are back on her, razor-focused. “Anyone I'd begin a relationship with will die long before I will no matter their age now, should I just never have a relationship for fear of loss?”

That causes Cat to swallow and close her eyes in acknowledgment. It’s a good argument, probably Kara’s strongest, and Kara knows it. Cat thrives on logic, but this isn’t all about logic.

Kara smiles down at their feet. “Plus, we both know our worldviews are much more similar than you'll ever admit out loud.”

Cat scoffs and Kara grins up at her. “And bringing up food was a mistake, you know I'll eat almost anything.” She nudges forward and that brings the slightest of flushes to Cat's cheeks.

Yeah, she's seen the signs.

“You have Carter and Adam, I know, and you know I would never come between the three of you. I have Alex, and I trust you to never come between the two of us.” At that, Cat nods and Kara reaches out to brush a strand of hair out of her eyes.

“Besides…” Kara scuffs her boot on the balcony cement and blushes a bit herself. “She sorta, kinda thinks we've been in a secret relationship for about six months now…”

Cat's eyes widen and she snorts. “Carter's got her beat by almost four months then.”

That's not what Kara's expecting at all and her face flushes even more. Maybe… maybe their friends will only find relief in their relationship. “So, that point you had about our friends might be moot by now.” She gets an eyeroll and a hand on her forearm for that and her chest feels tight and warm.

Kara tries to sober her smile though. “But you're right about our jobs and responsibilities. However, I'd just like to point out that I can travel well over the speed of sound, so… perhaps finding time together won't be so difficult?”

That pulls a smile from Cat, one if her small, soft ones. That's what had drawn Kara in initially, these little glimpses of softness that came more and more frequently as they spent time together. The hand at her forearm squeezes and Kara takes another tiny step forward.

She drops her voice to a whisper because some words are still hard to say, harder to hear. “And yeah, I have bad days and so do you. But that's the point of a relationship, isn't it? Supporting each other.”

Cat nods and closes her eyes, thinking. Her heart's still beating a little quickly but Kara, for once, doesn't have that need to know what's in her mind. She's pretty sure she knows what's on Cat's mind, considering she's floating outside a penthouse suite in Washington, DC. She moves her hand to touch Cat's on her arm but Cat opens her eyes.

“Well, I suppose your rebuttals are rather convincing. So, you're up for all of this then? You know, me, the pomp, the media, that's going to be rough.” Cat inches a little closer and eyes her hand and yeah-

“I'm sure.” She blinks and frowns. “I don't plan on dating you as Supergirl though.” And maybe that's what Cat thought, oh gosh, and she wouldn't want to date her former assistant publicly, of course of cou-

“Good. Because I don't want to publicly date Supergirl.” Cat quirks a smirk and it's like butterflies take off in Kara's stomach. “The windblown hair look is good on me, I know, but far too much maintenance.”

Kara chuckles, of course of course, that's the only issue. She reaches her hand out, slowly, and Cat laces their fingers together and there's the soft smile she'd fallen for all those years ago. It twists down though and Kara squeezes her hand gently.

“There's going to be a lot of talk about a boss and her former assistant though.” She squints at Kara and raises her right hand to straighten the collar of a suit that won't wrinkle.

Kara reaches up and takes that hand too. “It's a good thing you're not my boss anymore then, hmm?” She takes the last step forward between them and she can hear Cat's heartbeat, thud-thudding in her chest. “And I think I can survive the press just fine.” She stops and blinks, pulling back a little. “But what about Carter and Adam?”

That's when Cat kisses her. Pushes up on tiptoe to press their lips together and Kara startles so it's short but then Kara leans down and oh. Cat feels like coming home.

She wraps her arms around Cat's waist and splays a hand across her back, pulling her closer. The lips she’s wanted for so, so long are warm and pliant and when Cat bites at her bottom lip, Kara’s sure her knees will give out beneath her. It’s a damn wonder she hasn’t plummeted through the cement.

Cat pulls back after Kara groans and that’s maybe for the best because Kara’s not sure she could stop if they kept going. Cat’s heady like a drug and Kara’s never been this high before.

She takes a moment to breathe, not opening her eyes, and Cat’s still pressed up against her. “I think-” She swallows and licks her lips, feels Cat hum out over her skin. “I think, if we’re making a ‘pro-con’ list, that should go in the ‘pro’ list.”

The chuckle that that pulls washes over Kara and that should go on the ‘pro’ list too.

“So,” Cat husks, husks, in her ear and Kara’s got to disengage now. They should really go on a date first. “What else is on your ‘pro’ list?”

“Dinner.” And Cat pulls away with a confused smile and Kara rushes to clarify. “Dinner, with you, at the same time, like y’know. Uhm.”

Cat’s confusion is gone, it’s all smirks and wow, it’s gotta be the emotional whiplash that has Kara in such a daze. “A date? Are you finally asking me out on a date?”

“Finally?” Kara repeats the word because that would mean- “You’ve wanted me to ask you out on a date?” Which seems like a rather silly question when Cat is nearly pressed flat against her but Kara’s doing her best. “I mean, for how long?”

Cat licks her lips and winks and what that’s even supposed to mean is completely beyond Kara but she can kiss Cat. So she does… a couple of times. But really, a date first.

She pulls away and Cat wraps her arm around her shoulders, “Not so fast, we have time to make up for.” Kara’s pulled in for another kiss and her earpiece buzzes.

Now is not the time, Not with a capital N but the world doesn’t stop turning so Kara places her hands on Cat’s hips and pushes her back, holding her still when she attempts to step forward. “So, y- you are really good at that, that is definitely on the ‘pro’ list. So is this dress, this is a nice dress, and so is this balcony actually.”

Cat doesn’t seem impressed with the distance between them and squirms in her hold, which does nothing to ease Kara’s soon departure. “As much as I enjoy your displays of strength, Kara, why are you all the way over there?” Her hands trace over the Zor-El seal at Kara’s chest and that’s when Kara pushes off the balcony.

She’s not going to sleep with Cat right now. “We should really do dinner first.”

Cat looks about half a second from pitching herself off the balcony after Kara, glaring in that way that makes board members cave to her demands. “We’ve done many dinners, Kara. Many late nights, many daring rescues where I’ve been held in your arms long enough to give a woman thoughts, Kara. I must say, I wasn’t expecting to have to chase your skirt so early in this relationship.”

And that’s just a lot all of a sudden, cause Cat’s pulse is hammering and it’s Kara she’s looking at like she wants to devour and seriously, why in all of good Rao’s graces is her earpiece still buzzing? “But those weren’t real dates, we should- should do a real date.”

“Kara Zor-El Danvers, if you fly away right now, I swear you will regret it.”

“I already do, but there’s also an alien and y’know we talked about the Superhero-ing thing and it being bigger than the both of us and-”

“Yes but I’ve never had the lesbian version of cock-blocking happen because of an alien before. Though…” and Kara’s half out of the sky at hearing Cat say ‘cock-block’ already what in the world could- “Depending on what you’re into, that is an equally fitting descriptionary phrase.”

Kara’s not going to make it. Her earpiece keeps buzzing but her mind is already shut down. No one, not even Alex, will believe her if she tells them that Cat Grant casually said ‘cock-block’ to get Kara into bed with her. She’s not thinking at all, it’s true, and she runs.

She’ll hear about the tree she took out in the morning, Alex is never going to let that go, but for now she’s got a Trethis that doesn’t understand anything but common galactic…

#supercat #talks #sol is a boo #the closest I will come to writing angst #it's not angst cause it makes sense #it is a sensible convo to have that does not drag on for a million years because adults can solve problems woooooooooooooooo