#im getting my teeth looked at wednesday im equal parts excited and terrible

[shimp-heaven]

:3c

#being unemployed and insane is a fucking trip lol #i desperately want to be doing something but i cant go three days without having an episode #and my therapist isnt acknowledging most of my symptoms #im going through emdr for ptsd but like what about the psychosis what about the mood swings #ive talked about my horrible sensory issues and she says its just anxiety and im like what #i cant even get out of the house cause im not allowed to drive and everything within walking distance is fuvking expensive as hell #and ubers arent in the budget #thank god theres a sliding scale clinic where i get my meds for literal cents idk what i would do without it #im getting my teeth looked at wednesday im equal parts excited and terrible #depression and sensory issues have wrecked my teeth :( #idk bro #im thinking about selling some of my higher value plushes to get some money to do something fun #cause i have negative five dollars in my bank account lol #i would just go to the library or something but one i cant get there myself #and two when my gf gets off work shes usually dog tired so i feel so freaking guilty for asking her #i have an active disablility claim its about nine months in #so maybe ill get lucky and have it approved but i super doubt it #since my psych team refuses to diagnose me with anything #apparently its really hard to get approved for ptsd and thats like my biggest on paper issue thats actually listed #i talk about getting a job but i cant even be in a gas station for more then two minutes without freaking out #so idk how i think im gonna be able to handle a job #plus itll look really bad on my disability claim if i get a job #so im kinda damned if i do damned if i dont #ugh im just shaking myself by the shoulders and yelling BE NORMAL JUST BE NORMAL #but :3 i stay silly i guess #idk if youve actually read this i give you an internet cookie 🍪 #if you have any advice let me know i guess