#im brainstorming im reaching out im making content. jesus christ im so tired. im doing so much and theres no pay off at all and im stuck

[ournextdoorneighbor]

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#im tired. am i going to get my period soon #probably. #but its not like i havent been feeling like shit the last 3 months so i cant exactly blame my tiredness to my period cycle #im being so so brave about my job. im being so brave abt the idea of going to the office for 3 days straight #i feel like if i stop to think even for a milisecond im gonna start crying and no one wants to see that #at the same time i dont have time for it. #i keep thinking abt all the times they told me that you’d have to actively look for a job in the art industry #to constantly be advocating for yourself if you want to stay and i am trying so hard. im applying im submitting im rewriting my statements #im brainstorming im reaching out im making content. jesus christ im so tired. im doing so much and theres no pay off at all and im stuck #in this job that i hate will every fibre of my being. i just want to do something im happy with again. i want to wake up and be excited abt #doing work again. be happy abt going to work and talking to ppl i like. im doing so much but nothings working #what is the point #bestie i am so fucking done. i wang to curl up in bed all day and cry