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elftwink · 3 years

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i have now seen the new cinderella movie twice and it’s so weird. first of all it’s probably because i’d only ever heard about the movie via tiktoks making fun of it and not seen any ads but i didn’t know it was a jukebox musical and it took me like three songs to figure it out but like... all the song choices are so bizarre? most of them just barely apply to the scene so it feels more like an interruption than a natural progression. it also feels like they made 0 attempt to match singers up to a style that they’re used to and sound good in which is partly i think why the vocals are getting torn apart so bad.

i mean like. okay sorry this is going to be very self important ex theatre kid of me to say but if you listen to camila cabello in million to one (a song they WROTE!! for this movie!!![i think]) it sounds like she’s trying to belt using her head voice and so it sounds so strained and not in like an ‘overpowering emotion’ strained but like she can literally barely get the notes out. and like hey. why did you make her sing that then. why is it so bad when you wrote it for a person who already has a successful career singing for a musical that isn’t even live like you can edit the audio and process it and do several takes if one doesn’t sound the best.

and the reprise is so bad because it has all the same problems but it’s in that part of the plot right after the stepmother ruins her dress and before the fairy godmother arrives and she’s like crying and it’s very sad and then the energy of the scene completely changes for her to do another uplifting verse of million to one and it’s like WHY ARE YOU MAKING HER SING THIS LIKE THAT. and the lyrics are adding NOTHING!!! to the story!! it’s just the chorus so it’s nothing new and it feels almost unrelated to ella’s emotional state. and bc of that the only thing you can focus on is the vocals!! and how they’re very clearly not her best work!!

it feels like this movie was written by someone who has seen a musical but not really understood it at all. the songs come in abruptly, and it’s very poorly communicated when characters can hear each other. while they generally fit the vibe of the scene that’s... all they do. like in a musical the lyrics of the song are dialogue. they’re part of the story; if you remove them you leave holes in the story because major plot beats should be happening there. in cinderella (2021), songs are just kind of about the scenes, if that. the plot sort of happens around them, to the point where it’s sometimes annoying when they start singing bc it’s a 3 minute pause on anything you actually wanna see. this is the musical people are talking about when they’re telling you why they hate musicals and don’t find them believable.

ONE good section song wise was seven nation army which is annoying bc it’s prefaced by whatta man which.... has just an awful instrumental arrangement like stop leaving these singers out to dry. but like anyway this happens when the prince first comes to the ball and the various women come to try out to be princess sing whatta man and then they transition into a rendition of seven nation army by the prince which... in this context works! it comes off as melodrama from the prince and offers a different interpretation of the song that i think is actually really funny. it has personality, it fits with the story, which makes it so weird that most of the other songs do not. like i could put together a better track list for this movie i think.

and that all sucks because in between the songs, the movie is actually like... pretty good. like not great; it’s very... direct with its #girlpower plotline in a sort of tell-not-show way, so some lines of dialogue feel like the writers thought you might be too stupid to pick up on the fact that ella wants independence and [financial] freedom but misogyny is a major barrier in her way even though that’s the whole point. BUT the plot itself is actually a kind of fun twist on cinderella, if not 100% untrodden ground. the characters all have motivations and goals that make sense. the stepsisters and stepmother are great; i think sometimes cinderella retellings make the stepfamily very cartoonish and flat, but i think they feel like real people (i mean, a little silly, but that’s in keeping with the tone of the movie; and it means the stepsisters make for decent comic relief without ruining the tension between ella and the stepmother). most of the jokes landed! if there were 0 songs this would be a fairly decent family movie with a kind of wildcard cast. but instead it’s This. wow.

(also it’s really unclear whether the problem is interpersonal misogyny or systemic misogyny, and the movie seems to purposefully conflate the two. the prince points out that women are not allowed to run businesses, and refers to purchasing ella’s dress as doing his part to correct a flawed system. women have a prescribed role in royal courts that would require ella to give up her work. the stepmother’s entire motivation behind trying to get the [step]daughters to marry rich is that women only have social mobility through marriage to men; men who control their lives and can on a whim destroy them. but then also you simply just have to believe in yourself and not let anybody tell you what to think about yourself and it will all work out! like hello?? what are the laws in this kingdom. maybe i’m too leftist for this movie. i don’t know what i expected from an amazon original.)

disclaimer i’m not a singer or a musical expert and i don’t know what i’m fucking talking about i have no qualifications i was a drama kid over 5 years ago and that’s all. i just love to be a bitch. xoxo

anyway. 4/10.

#good idea generator #under a cut because i had a lot to say about cinderella (2021) apparently #spoilers ig if you care about that? what was this movie

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sweetest-honeybee · 5 years

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Consider this totally awesome idea hat someone should write:

Okay so old timey medieval au where deceit is a naga king and stuff and lives in a mountain away from another kingdom. Although he doesn’t technically have a kingdom he self proclaimed himself as a king Bc he wants to feel powerful.

Anyway, Thomas is a king and stuff and he’s heard tales about the naga king being like fifty feet tall and a hundred feet long tail and sharp teeth and claws. Essentially, he’s kinda afraid of this guy so he send his best knight Roman in like “hey you so ur gonna kill this thing” and Roman is ECSTATIC bc he never actually does much despite his reputation.

So he goes to the mountain and he’s at this H U G E temple engraved with sneks and stuff and there’s a few skeletons laying around and now he’s kinda nervous but goes inside anyway, somehow avoiding every trap there is.

Now anyway he gets inside completely and he sees this dude. This dude is tiny, like 5 feet tall, scrawny and weak, and his tail is only about ten feet long. The dude sees him and introduces himself as Dolos the Naga King.

Now Roman just BUSTS OUT LAUGHING Bc this is the monester the people talked about?! He’s tiny!

But no Dolos is offended and stuff so he’s like “well if ur gonna laugh lemme show ya smtn” so he grows himself to this HUMONGOUS SIZE and now he’s fifty feet tall and his tail is a hundred feet long and now he’s got the fangs and the claws and snake eyes and thick skin flaps on either side of his head like a cobra

And yes Roman did possibly maybe soil himself at the sight of it but at the same time he was very g a y for this king. LIKE HE WAS A LARGE SHIRTLESS, BUFF, NAGA KING DRAPED IN GOLD AND JEWELS LIKE HOW COULD YOU NOT THINK THATS FUCKING HOT????? And that forked tongue was already doing things to his imagination holy hell

Anyways, Dolos is like ‘why you staring’ and gets it immediately that Roman is too in love for his own good. “Oh I see you got your eye on something pretty?”

And Roman is like “WAIT WAIT NO NO IM SUPPOSED TO KILL YOU” And Dolos plays innocent and is like ‘why would you kill me? Have I done anything wrong’ and right here I’m gonna point out that he’s never actually done anything wrong, he just shines his jewels 24/7 and sleeps a lot bc it’s kinda cold in that temple

So Roman is so conflicted bc on one hand he could fail Thomas and not kill Dolos or he could stay and fake his death and have a possibility of being he second king even though he’s not a naga

But the sound of a certain monotone voice grabs his attention and Thomas’s royal adviser L O G A N is at the FUCKING DOOR with a BOW AND ARROW AIMED AT THE FUCKING SNEK

And he’s like beet red from anger bc roman hasn’t killed this bitch yet and of course if you wat it done right you gotta do it yourself

Anyways, in a split second of panic Roman is like D O N T. S H O O T. and this leaves everyone surprised honestly, even himself and Dolos is trying to decide if he wants to use this to his advantage and kill the both of them while they’re distracted or let roman explain himself

And so he chooses the second option

Not like Roman was in love with this dude for years but he tells logan stuff Lille giving Dolos a chance in the kingdom and right there and then Dolos is P E T R I F I E D bc that kingdom hates him and is scared of him and he’s very very scared of them and Logan is just sitting there like “wtf you come in here for two seconds nad now you’re in love with him?????? HAVE YOU NIT HEARD THE TALES OF THIS DUDE HE COULD KILL YOU”

“.......just wanna interject here I haven’t actually killed anyone......those skeletons are a defense thing to keep away people.......?”

And logan is like “okay great that’s lovely even tho I don’t believe you. Still you’re not coming to the kingdom, you’re too large anyway”

And the moment logan turns away to walk out with a very sad and depressed Roman, Dolos slithers up the them in the smaller size.

“Yeah I’m just too large aren’t I?”

Stuff happens, yada yada yada and theyleav and Thomas meets the snek and somehow he and Roman get together and everything is at peace and stuff

And if you wanna go the angst route, have someone order Dolos for execution bc they refuse to believe he’s hardly nice at all and Roman like gets killed in the process and now we have a sad noodle

#thomas sanders #thatsthat24 #sanders sides #my art #tw deceit #deceit sanders #ts deceit #deceit #sympathetic deceit #roman sanders #ts roman #roceit

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howtotrainyouragents · 4 years

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Agent H’s Book Reactions

Isle of Blood and Stone by Makiia Lucier

The sudden appearance of two maps unlocks the mystery behind the disappearance of the princes of Del Mar

-It seems mean of me to rant about the bad things about this book because I know it’s not hugely known, from a smaller publisher/author, it’s #ownvoices, and I believe in giving books like this a fair, even generous, chance. But that being said...I have a lot to complain about.

-How- HOW- is it possible to take a book with a such a gripping premise, and make it the most boring book ever?

-Maybe this is just me, but I believe that the story should have started by the time you’re 100 pages in.

-Okay, I think there’s at least one major reason it’s so boring: the worldbuilding gets in the way of the story. This book is a great example of detailed attention to the everyday lives and society of the characters, but there’s just. too. much. of. it. You drop the worldbuilding essentials in the beginning and then you get going with the plot, only stopping to fill in worldbuilding when it’s relevant or when you need to create breathing room. This book drops in worldbuilding factoids literally so often that I started a (nonalcoholic bc I’m responsible) drinking game from it. Like, cool backstory but none of this random shit matters?? Tell me about the maps and the princes, I don’t really care about the society that much when it’s so irrelevant to the plot.

-Oh my goodness, the fact that there’s an entire sequence where Elias almost gets the plague and then doesn’t and the entire thing is not even important to the plot really capture my frustrations with the lost potential of this book. Like, someone ring Chekov, I think I found his gun unused.

-I am so grateful that there were the spirits of Javelin and the sea serpent because otherwise I would have straight up murdered this book for being so boring.

-Maybe this is just my pet peeve, but she switches between using non-contractions for her characters to sound formal, and using contractions to make them sound natural and it’s just really inconsistently done. Please pick one and stick to it; it’ll be less jarring

-I do wish that the book had alternating POV between Elias, Mercedes, and Ulises rather than 95/5/1 split between Elias, Mercedes, and Ulises respectively (which by the way, probably another pet peeve, but that’s a terrible way to split POV. Either keep it to one character or split evenly don’t just randomly jump for like a quarter-chapter and then come back to the main narrator). Like they all had skin in the game and it could have been really interesting to see how this journey is affecting all of them. Elias was not compelling enough to be the main POV. Mercedes definitely was (I wouldn’t have minded if it was from all her POV). Ulises maybe not but he could have if he’d gotten some attention.

-I’m not even sure where to start with Elias. We had one great intro scene of him, and then the next scene he’s literally throwing a temper tantrum to all his friends/mentors/leaders. That got me way off on the wrong foot with him. He’s supposed to be a kind of a rogue and a troublemaker, but his personality is honestly just kinda bland and a little depressing. He’s like top of the game, so there’s no rooting for him. And then he doesn’t do the obvious, right thing by taking Reyna on as his apprentice but hands her off to someone else after there was so much build up. And then like, I know this quest was personal for him, but I feel like Mercedes and Ulises had much more interesting and bigger stakes at hand; I would much rather see them struggle with the implications of this quest then see Elias dance around this and not really struggle with it.

-Look, I get that Mercedes is actually totally an appropriate name for the regional/historical setting, but it’s also an incredibly famous modern name, and this right here is a great example of the Tiffany Problem= the name Tiffany was actually a common Medieval name but it can’t be used in fantasy because it’s too modern looking and would seem unrealistic to the audience. I mean, Lucier, good for you for going for it anyway but it did throw me for a loop (and that’s on me, I knowww)

-Oh cool, so the war against Mondrago was completely unjustified. That’s shitty. They can rebuild the nation, but they’ll never admit the truth and give the people justice. That’s super shitty.

-There’s so many things about this book that made me angry, but the fact that it tried to make me feel sympathetic for Mercedes because one (1) old woman spat at her (and missed her, mind you) is like way at the top. I think Mercedes being half-Mondragan is fascinating (although it’s mitigated by the fact she’s royalty so it’s not like she was ever in danger of discrimination), but we never see her facing the dangers of her ethnicity. The one (1) incident we see is that a woman spat her, and then Elias and Ulises are all up in arms and they all spend the rest of the book being angry about it. Like, I get it, if someone I loved was spat at, I’d feel the same way. But as a reader, you have to make me care. You have to show me the injustice she faces because of her identity (she’s in danger, she can’t get work, she’s not safe outside, take your pick, it doesn’t have to be gritty,). I’m not saying this from a “POC facing racism shows realism” perspective, I’m saying this as a reader, we need her to have real, serious stakes in the game in order for her and FOR US to be invested in her journey. There needs to be some struggle so that there’s satisfaction when the truth is revealed and the Mondragans are innocent (although, see above point). Otherwise. It’s. Just. Boring.

-You can tell the author really really liked Reyna (especially since the second book is about her??), but I really really did not care about her at all. Like I thought she was a sweet kid, but she really did not need to have the plot/emotional/character signficance that she did when 1) it’s super weird having this mature-for-her-age 9 year old amongst all these young adults/adults and 2) more time spent with her meant less time spent with characters who actually mattered, i.e. Mercedes, Ulises, Lord Silva

-I wanted way more of Ulises, but I will conceded that that’s because of my ultimate weakness for royal men.

-Also this book feels the compelling need to spell everything out. Which is annoying but fine except for the one time that it doesn’t spell it out and it should have:

-The reveal of the villain made no sense?? I was sitting in the bookstore cafe and I think everyone was giving me weird looks because I kept throwing my hands up and cursing. IT MADE NO SENSE. Those were the most tenuous clues put together ever, and then Elias doesn’t tell anyone or even the audience. He just decides to ride night and day only to stop at the edge of a cliff and not his actual destination. That idiot. The reveal of the villain helper ALSO MADE NO SENSE, just for the record

-At least the reveal of Elias’ father was obvious and kinda cathartic

-The mystery of the disappearance was also pretty well done and I’ll give her that. It was sad and complicated and I at least kinda understand why the characters made those choices? BUT, there was one thing that I refuse to accept: They expect us to believe that FIVE soldiers took out TWENTY royal guards and kidnapped multiple people??? Like, I get it, the wine was supposed to take everyone out, but if I were planning this kidnapping, I would not take the risk. I’d bring thirty guys just in case. I’m not frightened for the characters with less than half a dozen attackers; bring me the squad and make it a double and then we’ll talk.

-I didn’t hate the romance of the story, which is rare for me and YA, so that’s something

-Despite what this may look like, I didn’t hate this book. I’d recc it to the right person. But I’d spent a long time hoping to read this book, and I think I’m just a little disappointed by the lost potential and super frustrated by the dullness

-Why is it called Isle of Blood and Stone?? Why is the series Tower of Winds??Am I just dumb? Bitch, I might be

#I won't be mean I won't tag this #agent h #agent book reaction #wow I have no mercy #Me; says I won't drag this book and then immediately do #sorry i really am

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merlinthoughts · 5 years

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Season 1 Episode 2 - Valiant

- ik for a fact that this one is the episode with the asshhoole. not bc i recognised it from the title but perhaps it was because i recognised it from the title u got me there

- i always go to mr clean too when i want protection, val, ur not alone

- yeah, this is harry potter l ma o

- the next thing u know theres a stone that makes arthur live forever and the snakes start joining into one and growing bigger until a phoenix (im dibbing on kilgie here), pops their corneas out

- DAMN DON'T KILL UR DEALER WHERE U GONNA GET THE NEW SHIT FROM NEXT TIME SMH VALIANT

- okay but who names their son valiant

- he was probably named valerie and didnt like it so he said “woah imma be valiant like courage, thats sick”

- that was probably his superhero persona as a child ngl

- no, shev, no respect for val stop doing this

- merlin in armour, what a fucking bLESiSNG GIVING ME THIS RIGHT ON THE SPOT BBC KNOWS WHATS GOOD

- ok a y but hear me out, merlins a servant. i have not seen any of these servants been asked to train with the royals??? like in the sense where it helps the servant train as well?? and the FIRST thing arthur does with merlin as his servant is train with him. not only is arthur a huge JOCK, he’s not using his manservant properly

- neverfuckingmind “most servants collapse after the first blow”, so it seems to be arthur likes to train with his servants. now that in itself is a question to be asked, but is he the only royal who trains with his servants??? how did this man survive on his own without a personal servant until merlin??? did he have a personal servant??? was it just regular servants?? who are those other servants he trained with??? did arthur just say hey lets go to the field in the morning, put on armour and let’s have a fun time?? UNLESS merlin literally just took someones job away from them kmao

- also my mind went right to the gutter guys, ngl, it sounded like an innuendo. it had me quaking i wish i was one of those servants

- “we all have our duties, even arthur” “it must be so tough for him, all the *hesitates* girl, all the glory”

- so we probably get at least 1 out of every 2 episodes where there’s a scene with merlin dressing arthur in his armour. bring the popcorn, lads.

- MORGANA LOOKING LIKE A FRICKEN SNACK

- the reigning champion is arthur, wonder fucking w h y

- valiant is in fucking mustard, while arthur is fucking ketchup idk why i thought of that but it happened. my literature teacher always told me to look for symbolisms. guess we found one guys.

- merlin after hating on arthur for the past episode is literally just cheering arthur on like a good husband he is

- did ARTHUR JUST SNICKER AT MERLINS “CREEP” LMAO DON'T TRY AND HIDE IT BY HUFFING AT HIM AFTERWARDS YOU FUCKING GOOF

- omg he hid it by telling merlin to do a full novel of chores

- AND MERLIN DOES IT WITH MAGIC A PAIR OF GOOFS

- “are you using magic again” “no” merlin ffs he just saw you use magic, while the items fell and landed right in front of him while you didn’t move at aLL. they are nOT BLIND

- “very aggressive style” I MEAN SURE UTHER

- valerie be fuckboying morgana lmao with a “i saw you watching” and a, “then i will give everything to win the tournament”

- i wish this show was set in the early 2000s so i can see val in low sweatpants, a backwards cap with gelled spiky hair and cheap neon sunglasses (maybe even some gold teeth just for kicks), while hes trying to rap 50 cents or make a mixtape of brit pop songs. bc yes.

- honestly im loving my 2000 fuckboy au. gonna make an ao3 after this.

- of course merlin would be the one to find out the magic shit in valiants room, it just lures him. AND OF COURSE VALIANT IS THERE

- i'm so fucking glad arthur looks confused as to how merlin did what he asked. when u have this kind of hubby, arthur, its amazing what things he can do.

- i dont know why theres dramatic music as merlin put armour on arthur but im living for it

- “is it my imagination or are you beginning to enjoy yourself?” merlin doesn't know what to say to that bc he’s turning gay and doesn't know if that counts as enjoying oneself when the one you are gay for is the asshole prince

- typically enough, valiant and arthur never fight except for the finale. like with all conveniences in place, youd expect them to have at least fought at some point with as much knights as there to determine the final two but no, just the finale. k.

- this poor fucking purple knighted bloke didn’t need to be fucking demonstrated on, val. like you didn't need to kill him?? that could have blown ur cover

- DID NOBODY SEE THAT??? DID NOBODY SEE THE FUCKING SNAKES???

- oooh merlin found out what happened everyone gonna be fucked. nobody harms arthur is he has something to say about it

- if someone starts off a sentence with “i just saw someones snakes on their shield come alive” nobody would fucking believe you, merls. but given the fact that magic exist… mhh maybe it wouldn’t be too absurd. but ppl apparently are thick as hell

- “why were you in his chambers” well i know how id explain if i was in valiants chambers ;)

- jk i dont fall for this toxic shit

- imagine getting paid as an actor just just lie down there like this poisoned kid. “yeah, id like to audition for ewan’s role???” “why are you lying on the ground?”

- i hate those tropes where it's like “i know how to tell someones bad, here’s proof” and then nobody believes you and tells you you’re lying and should die or whatever but then you kNOW IT'S THE FUCKIN TRUTH BITCH that trope gives me damn anxiety >:((

- yes merlin, fucking slash the shield with your sword. i'm sure that's how it works. im sure it will kill the snakes.

- HOWA RE THE SNAKES ALIVE WITHOUT VAL SAYING “ISHNAHASHAHI”

- i think val would know that you cut off the snake’s head, merls, just saying. ur were the oNLY ONE.

- TELL ARTHUR WHAT??? “I CUT A SNAKE”

- EXACLTY ONG THAT'S WHAT MERLIN FUCKING SAID I WAS RIGHT LMAO

- ARTHUR BELEIVED HIM I'M FUCKING LIVING BUT IK WHAT HAPPENS AND AHH

- uhhh the anxiety is rolling up boys

- ewan is mcfuckingdead

- snake be sliding in like a hoe on a business

- bfehfjdjfskf i hate this part

- arthur's pride, merlin’s pride, fuck me

- i'm not even gonna write this part, it breaks my fragile heart when arthur sees the look of people not believing him, especially his dad, and merlin seeing how arthur doesn't trust him anymore like prepare the eulogies girlies

- okay but if arthur is struck and gaius has the antidote?? arthur aint gonna die technically

- but now val knows merlin knows

- AND MERLIN INTERVENES

- why are royals so bitchy towards servants. like they do their best to help you??? they are loyal to you and are paid there to serve you and are often very kind, generous, passive, understanding people??? yet merlin interrupts uther and he fucking sends him to the pit

- VAL YOU ASS LMAO DON'T HURT MY SON’S PRIDE

- he said allegations like four times, yes uther we know ur vocab is shining with intellect but seriously, there’s other synonyms that could still be acceptable and still sound fancy

- quick search on google bc my mind doesnt roll fast enough: claim, assertion, charge, accusation, declaration, statement, contention, deposition, argument, affirmation. see daddy uther, not hard to look up.

- forget they didnt have internet whoopsies

- :((( arthur doesn't trust merlin anymore

- the husbands FIGHT

- not just a banter petty fight, this is a huge fight

- SACKING MERLIN DON'T FUCKING SACK MERLIN YOU GOOF

- TRUST UR HUBBY

- FUCK

- I'M GONNA CRY AND IT'S ONLY EPISODE TWO

- I'M HAVING EMOTIONAL PROBLEMS CONCERNING MY TWO BOYS

- GUYS IM NOT OKAy

- its been 2 minutes after i wrote that last sentence, and i am now okay

- “a half cannot truly hate that which makes it whole” iconic as hell. so many things could be said about that quote. either for innuendo purposes, love purposes, destiny purposes, how long it took me to say it right, just so many purposes man. it’s just iconic.

- merlin looks absolutely done with kilgaharama’s shit

- “just give me a straight answer” seems like kilgarass here is being too gay for merlin

- gwen already knows merlin’s the heroin of the series, saying everyone knows it's merlin who will save the day. but same tbh

- i dunno if this is like me or not but it says her nickname is gwyn in the subtitles but im typing it as gwen which i thought was how u wrote it, even if her full name is gwynevere but like gwen has a ring to it while gwyn sounds like gwin or smth and i dunno which one is right so ill just leave it alone ahjsjfk

- MORGANA HAS VISIONS WE ALREADY KNOW WHERE THIS GOES SHES MAGIC ISNT SHE HAHAHAHAUHD

- merlin trying one last time to convince his husband not to die, but at least this time arthur knows he’s up for val’s magic and is like “k iloveyou but i have to do this for the country not just bc of pride and thinking val is not magic”

- staring into the fire like he’s hoping it would suck him up into the void, not only is merlin a now confirmed emo, so is fucking arthur it seems. perfect for one another i'm telling you

- eerie music as morgana enters… wha suddenly i can't read

- i thought at first morgana and arthur were gonna end up together cause of the fucking weird tension going on and i was prepared to be disfuckinggusted but no! the show and producers actually put my expectations away and helped me see that it wasn’t going in that direction! thank fucking god!

- k but arthur looks majestic in his gear im just a huge bi

- “don’t go into my room” he says then gaius peaks in and almost gets mauled by a large chihuahua

- me too val, id step on someone's toes then fuck them up with an undercut. thats the bad bitch way to go. unless it for arthur, then val hahaha you can go fuck yourself

- no one sees mErLin??

- but they now see the snakes smh fakes

- “what are you doing? i didn't summon you” i don't think that will work val cause you didn't say it with a serpent tongue, it has to sound more like “shhashhwhat ahhssare hiisssyou iisshhaadoing?”

- okay but i thought arthur was impaled for a half second until he started to talk then i screamed that he was aight and he would now believe merlin

- uther better give merlin an apology

- arthur just said he wouldnt

- but still uther BETTER APOLOGISE TO FUCKING MERLIN

- “yknow i wish valiant was escorting me” “me too” i thought for a fricken moment arthur wished valiant would have escorted HIM. i'm dying.OMG

- “i wanted to say i made a mistake. it was unfair to sack you.” “don’t worry about it. buy me a drink and we’ll call it even.” DID YOU JUST SAY WHAT I THINK YOU JUST SAID MERLIN YOU SLY DOG OMG

- “i can’t really be seen to be buying drinks for my servant.” so if he wasn’t ur servant?? you’d say yes?? they are so fucking gay i can't anymore

- yeah, i literally fucking can't

#merlin #merlin bbc #merthur #s1 #this is early bc well it was already written #peeps up for the next one boys #tho its not done #expect it in a few days oop #s1.2

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