#if i don’t look like a kyoya ohtori variant by the end of this i don’t want it

[fingertipsmp3]

So was anyone going to tell me I have a lazy eye or was I supposed to find that out by zoning out on facetime myself

#so i don’t think it’s like. egregiously bad. not as far as i know anyway #but my right eye essentially fucks off any time i’m tired; zone out; or if i intentionally unfocus my eyes #i can sort of feel it happen but also not really. and now i’m upset because howww many times has this happened #and no one ever SAID anything??? is this why people think i’m strange and offputting. is this why i get tons of interviews #but basically never get offered the job. are people unnerved by it? do they think i do it on purpose?? #i mean i Can do it on purpose but generally i’m not #like idc what people think of it really but i would have preferred to know that this was a thing my body is doing #how many zoom/teams/google/facetime meetings have i been in and zoned out while someone explained something to me #and no one ever SAID anything. i mean i’ve also never said to somebody ‘hey you have a lazy eye’ so it makes sense i gues #but??????? #ugh i need to get an eye test don’t i. i hope i don’t need glasses full time. i hate wearing glasses #i’m not convinced that we as a society have done all we can to 1) manufacture glasses that FUCKING STAY CLEAN AND DON’T MIST UP #and 2) don’t make me look stupid as fuck #i have a face that just. doesn’t suit glasses. any glasses. i can’t explain it #if i’m getting them i want a pair that do the anime thing where they turn blinding white when you push them up your nose #if i don’t look like a kyoya ohtori variant by the end of this i don’t want it #personal