#idk it just feels like i am broken somehow. like i've missed on something fundamental and now it's too late to do anything about it

[peniscat]

:)

#10pm on a saturday is a wonderful time to start thinking about how i am 23 and i've never been in a relationship #yeah i know that it doesn't define me etc but sometimes i'm just a bit bitter about it. as long as i remember ppl around me have had ppl #crushing on them and then they have relationships and it all just seems so easy. i have no clue how it all even works #siri how to get a gf pls help bc i do not know. and at this point it feels like everyone else knows how to navigate that #idk it just feels like i am broken somehow. like i've missed on something fundamental and now it's too late to do anything about it #and like. i get it. out of all the ppl in the world why would someone pick me. and i know my worth isn't tied to that #but it would still be nice to be loved. or wanted by someone. it wouldn't fix me but i'm pretty sure it would help some #it's just sad i think. maybe pathetic. and stupid too. and i hate how it makes me feel worthless even when i know it's irrational #it just sucks. and i don't even know what to do about it so i guess i'll just keep going. #pain misery suffering etc #personal