#i'm kinda inactive but i'm in the community

[sewi-li-suwi]

Wait what that wizard post has like... lore??? Omg I'm so excited that's lit

the post in question

yes!! well. kinda? all the people in the thread are members of the wizardposting community, where we roleplay as and make jokes about wizards with like silly spells and such. each person's playing a character that they've developed. there's even art in some cases! there're a lotta posts and blogs out there, it's well worth exploring around and searching blogs for #wizardposting, #wizard shit, #wizart, any tags like that

#i'm kinda inactive but i'm in the community #i play a character called sewi who is so pathetic #or at least that was the concept before she started learning some actually half decent spells #now it's like. she can TECHNICALLY kill you easily with life drain or instant dehydration but no fucking way she's gonna do that #instant dehydration is reserved solely for cleaning up spills and making dried fruit #life drain is for getting energy back when she's worn out. she mostly targets batteries with it. #ask #wizardposting #the one time she accidentally killed someone she did NOT deal well with it

[new-lorien-artist]

When you were too passionate in the tags (and hit tag limit) that Tumblr starts breaking around you

#ernest talks #continuing where i was #i have so little time recreationally and everyone around me is busier and I've gotten more anxious and nervous over the years #and that goes for everyone else i talk to or want to talk to #and i try creating these community events like hangouts or celebrations or anything to get people coming in #or try to host stuff and we're mostly busy #I'm super super grateful when we have those hangouts work!!! I'm always so happy when people can join or make time for them #i kinda just... mourn that this too will go away and people will dissipate and the fandom goes inactive again #so i really cherish the time we make to ask each other about our day when it comes to mind #<- pointing to me saying this because I've gotten more edged in recent years and stop talking to others so i can reflect #feel like I've been too salty on fandom lately (lately like the last two years) #i also have tons of posts about like the LL fandom not being dead and I'd like that to be true #but ahhhh busy busy busyyyyyyy #I'm also generally favorable to communicating on discord instead of tumblr #which not everyone uses casually #so that's also a huge factor #asks are fun but tbh i don't get a lot of conversations continued that way #it ends up a one and done thing #either there's significant pressure in the reply to make it good that isn't usual in other text form convos #or some other reason i don't know of #conversations end quicker on tumblr so i end up relying on discord convos more

[abyssembraced]

Mainly asking because I know the change might make things annoying with tagging and stuff.

You can read the tags if you want some extra info!

#ooc #((one week for this poll is probably excessive but whatever dgshshsf)) #((i just feel like the name doesn't really fit the blog and its muses anymore?)) #((like. ''scale-tippers'' is a reference to robin; coming from his most iconic critical quote)) #((because fun fact about this blog: when i reserved the url originally it was actually gonna be for a single muse blog for robin!)) #((but i never actually did that because i was too nervous to find and reach out to blogs in the fire emblem rp community dhdhsf)) #((so nothing ever happened with the blog until i finished tgaac and desperately wanted to write ryunosuke)) #((at the time i also still kinda felt like i could write robin even if the desire to do so already wasn't as strong at that point)) #((so i turned this blog into a dual muse for the two of them (plus kay as a request muse for certain friends))) #((and 'scale-tippers' worked really well as a url back then! it was a direct reference to robin but was also still quite fitting for ryuu)) #((what with him being a defence attorney and ''tipping the scales'' of justice over to 'not guilty' for his clients)) #(( (which is actually extra fitting for the tgaa/dgs games specifically given that the british courtroom has that giant scale of justice) ) #((hence the blog title; ''tipping the scales of justice and war'')) #((but nowadays ryunosuke and robin are BOTH extremely low muse)) #((to the point where i've actually been considering deleting both of them from my muse list)) #(( (or more accurately. archiving them. i'm not gonna fully delete any of their pages i spent too much time on them for that dgdgdshfs) )) #((but if both of those characters are removed then the blog name no longer makes any sense)) #((and even WITH them here it still makes no sense for the blog to be named after such inactive muses)) #((sure there's a chance the muse (and more importantly confidence) for them might come back but that'll only be if i replay their games)) #((and yeah i'm 100% gonna be replaying tgaa with my friend sometime soonish hopefully but. as much as i adore ryuu)) #((there's actually a 50-50 chance that either my muse for him will skyrocket after replaying tgaa)) #((OR it's gonna kill the muse for him completely because i just don't have the confidence that i can write him well and do my boy justice)) #((so. i feel like it might make sense to change my url to fit the muses that are actually active right now)) #((especially since ghost and rouxls share a theme of darkness. with ghost being a void god and rouxls being a darkner from a dark world)) #((i currently have the url ''abyssembraced'' reserved on a throwaway blog since that's what i might change it to if i do change it)) #((''voidembraced'' would actually be my first choice but that one's taken already so rip dhdhshfs)) #((my only concern though is like. what about if/when my muse for ghost and rouxls die)) #((once again the blog url isn't gonna suit the muses. but i don't wanna be constantly changing my url every time my muses change)) #((and i doubt other people would like that either)) #((so do i just stick with ''scale-tippers'' even if it doesn't make sense for my current muse list? i dunno.))

[c1trusmoon]

I know I'm kinda very inactive but cuphead community I need u to see this idea I had. do u see the vision

#cuphead #devildice #cuphead devil #king dice #cuphead king dice #the cuphead show

[caliginouscreature]

Sorry for being so inactive lately... been busy irl, and have been meaning to post here more often, but also, like... I always feel a bit shy approaching the 'kin communities on here because it kind of feels like everyone is sort of... "internet poisoned"? For lack of a possibly-better word. A lot of folks here on tumblr in the 'kin and alterhuman communities are children, and a lot of more prominent community figures treated like "elders" are only about my age or younger, and it feels really strange, to be honest. There's a lot of discussion of feelings and terminology, but very little "lifestyle"? It's like there's a universal expectation for everyone to just figure everything out on their own; you get some definitions here and there yeah, but the amount of variance says much more loudly "just figure out what it all means on your own, pal". ex. Not only can no one actually explain what "otherhearted" actually means sans relation to otherkin, but it feels like I never see anyone talk about dealing with what one could call "kin feels" in the workplace, when unable to acquire your habitat, etc... Othercon is online-only, and while I'm pretty sure I'd be unable to attend an in-person event, part of me has a hard time feeling like everyone is really taking it all seriously and is really unafraid of being "cringe" when obviously it's so much easier to act like you're so confident online. I kinda feel like meeting some wolfkin stereotypes in a park for snacks and doing a group howl would do more for me than years of reading essays on tumblr ever has.

I dunno, I tried watching a recording of an Othercon panel I felt would be relevant and useful to me once, and was floored at just how... utterly useless it was. Despite its promising title, it was just shallow "you're valid" garbage and internet discourse... Makes me feel severely alienated, to be honest.

#'youre valid' this 'just journal' that I'M ALMOST 30 WITH JOB AND TERRITORIAL why doesn't anyone have anything irl useful to say to me #otherkin community #othercon #alterhuman #otherkind #otherkin #fictionkind #fictionkin #I'd LOVE to visit the Silver Elves or something just to see someone in person who I know takes this stuff seriously #like... people who are actually trying to live AS their kintype and I KNOW they are. because all this online posturing makes me feel alone #but they're in HAWAI'I and so I can't just take a road trip + am not Doing That to the already-colonized-and-sick-of-tourists-Hawaiians

[heartshapedbubble]

HI HI HI ‼️‼️

I'm so happy the requests are open again (I was waiting for this 😭😭)

I hope exam season went well!!

Anyways,I'm back (if you still remember me smh) with a platonic request!!

Can I just have platonic Jack,Charles Holt (i think you write for him),Percy,and Burke any person of your choice (you can remove or replace some if it's too much/you dony write for them) with a child reader that's really paranoid,is scared of everyone and everything,and has just a deep backstory,for example with bad parents,and like a big brother who is a psychopath or smth (idk I made that up on the spot,you can change it if you'd like!!) kinda warming up to them,following them around like a lost puppy and just crying when they aren't there?

I hope it's not too complicated and made sense,and that you have a fantastic day!!

AHH HELLO FINALLY RESPONDING TO THIS REQ!!! sadly i'm stuck in an endless loop of exam seasons but so far i have all As!! B) partially the reason i've been inactive here, i'm working quite hard on my education this year!

of course i remember and i shall deliver - have a great day! <3

jack, charles holt, percy and burke lapadura with an upset!child reader hcs🎩✈️🧟‍♂️🔨

jack the ripper🎩

he warms up to you quite quickly. in his opinion, you can hide away behind him as much as you want and he'll gladly hold your hand whenever you want him to - just be careful not to cut yourself on his blades

i don't think jack is much of a listener. he just sees you curled up and sad and can't help but pity you, so little and innocent. who could have possibly wanted to harm such a precious little thing like you?

a bit tone-deaf in situations like these, i think he'd even baby you here and there. he's so determined to take good care of you he goes a bit overboard sometimes

as i mentioned before, he's more action-oriented in cases like these. despite the gravity of the situation his manner of speech remains light and even gleeful. in his eyes, now that you're with him there's no reason to worry anymore. he doesn't want to make you even sadder than before!

the type of caretaker to carry you around at all times and pick you up whenever he notices you're upset. in doubt? carry the lil kid on your shoulders

charles holt✈️

this man definetly has some fearful-avoidant attachment thing going on with him. at first he's awfully uncomfortable, seeking every possible moment to avoid you. he's not a bad guy - he just doesn't know how to react in situations like these and copes by escaping them as soon as he gets the opportunity.

on top of that, he has never been good with kids.

he pities you, though :( i think he'd see some part of his younger self in you and that would really rub salt into his wound

he talks to you in the same way that he talks to adults, except the occasional "little guy/little fella" and bends over/crouches whenever he talks so you two are at the same level

also the type to pick you up when he notices you're crying :( in general he's much more responsive once you two get closer, often patting your head and back in an attempt to comfort you

grab his hand *once* and he just follows along with you. no questions asked

he didn't get much attention as a kid so he's kind of projecting in the form of giving you all the affection he didn't receive, albeit shyly

percy🧟‍♂️

percy often uses his muteness to his advantage, playing deaf just so he can avoid the other residents and quicky return to his solitude. he knows it's bad but he literally experimented on cadavers, he's not below that.

yet he can't pretend forever.

something that percy copes the worst with (after his resurrection) is guilt. seeing you so upset, seeking any sort of comfort from the manor residents makes something inside of him break. probably not his heart, rather something more human that he can't exactly pinpoint.

not big on physical affection, instead guiding you with an occasional tap on the back or simply pointing towards something. he also communicates with you with his gaze - it has been, for the most part, drained of humanity, but the way he furrows his brows and blinks slowly makes you think he's trying to push the few remaining bits of empathy through his eyes, in hopes you'll understand what he wants to say to you.

likes going on walks with you after dinner. mostly through the corridors of the manor, straight to the garden where you two sit to catch a breather and appreciate the blooming plants

burke lapadura🔨

probably the most responsible (in a way) out of the four here tbh

the most communicative out of them too - when he's not preoccupied with his machines, he's a solid listener and provides his own insight and advice. often it's a bit too much for you since you're quite young, but he's trying his best ok :(

believes good food can soothe anything! he's not the type to cook hearty meals (do NOT let this man into the kitchen) but he always keeps some cookies in his workshop in case you visit

awkward with any sort of physical touch so he compensates with quality time. if the weather is nice enough he may propose a short fishing trip or flying kites in the backyard

the way he sees it, distracting yourself from your past trauma is the best way to cope with it. never mentions your upbringing unless you want to talk about it - he wants to create as much happy memories with you, even if it means spoiling you with new machines and toys

#identity v #idv #idv headcanons #idv imagines #identity v headcanons #idv fanfic #idv scenarios #idv burke #idv mad eyes #burke lapadura #identity v burke #identity v mad eyes #mad eyes #idv charles #idv aeroplanist #identity v charles #identity v aeroplanist #charles holt #idv percy #identity v percy #idv undead #identity v undead #idv jack #identity v jack #idv the ripper #idv ripper #identity v the ripper #identity v ripper #jack idv #jack the ripper idv

[guideaus]

im also not a fan of how the dad in hgsn goes from being intimidating and yoshiki not having a positive image of him, to the manga kinda presenting him like an awkward goof or sympathetically pathetic? the narrative seems to be babying this adult man, and ditched the initial depiction of his father being cold. i still think his past actions foreshadow things relating to yoshiki and hikaru, but him as a character felt a little annoying in this chapter, like it was a retcon.

yoshiki's mom is repeatedly fed up with the dad for his inaction and refusal to communicate, where he usually throws a tantrum and leaves the conversation, which happens over and over. yoshiki sides with her, and blames him for being embarrassed by neighbors knowing about their relationship troubles.

Here, she might have heard him praise her when he doesnt know she's there, or that he told yoshiki to make sure to tell her, too, but I don't think he does much that deserves a reward (his favorite meal being made), especially compared to his previous actions. In this scene, he doesn't resolve that he'll try to speak/listen to the mom, nor does he say that he should be acting better, so I don't think there's a reason for the mom to feel any less annoyed. In fact, I think if I was the mom, who repeatedly tried to broach important topics to him, he wouldn't step up, and I heard him having the opposite attitude not around me, i'd feel baffled, or at least annoyed, not subtly wanting to reward him for not even doing the bare minimum.

The main conversation is abt him sharing the past, but him suddenly complimenting her felt a little forced, like to make us believe he actually isnt that bad, even though he's not fixing his behavior. There's also no indication at the end of the scene implying him trying to do something different. Yoshiki gets info that he can't get anywhere else, so he's glad for that, and can relate considering the indoh situation and focuses on that, but also i'm not sure how he gets that info in the first place.

Another weird thing about the dad is that him helping Yoshiki is supposed to raise our opinion of him, but I'm honestly not sure why this happens. His main flaw that creates Yoshiki and his mom's low opinion of him is his failure to connect as part of the family, he struggles to speak to his own son casually and can't speak to his own wife (who he apparently won over to convince her to leave her own hometown) about serious issues. Yoshiki is understandably not interesting in engaging with someone who at best can offer some distant small talk, and I can see the mother also being frustrated that he can now share personal info here, when she's been trying to talk to him forever.

here, Dad does the same thing he always does, ask why the topic is being brought up, yoshiki similarly doesn't attempt to provide a reason, and inexplicably the dad continues on as if he's an NPC in a telltale game where the "..." dialogue choice effects nothing. Normally, I'd say maybe if Yoshiki attempted to be vulnerable, in turn the dad might reciprocate, but clearly at this point, the father is not interested in that. I think if Yoshiki actually pressed, the dad mightve felt threatened and resisted more, and yoshiki saying nothing I think... shouldnt have done anything. The father is mentioned to flee eventually after sitting like a scolded child, silently brewing in anger, so I don't really know what brought him out of his room he apparently hides in and made him talking abt what was needed beyond it being necessary for the plot. This is his first actual appearance, so I'm not sure what couldve worked to make him change his behavior, but I feel like I would've taken anything beyond it happening as easily as Yoshiki finding that Gehenna art (it damn near jumping out at him).

His depiction in ch. 25 just feels unfair to yoshiki and his mom's characters at that point. It gives too much leeway to the dad, as if he's not an adult, and almost makes yoshiki's previous feelings towards him feel silly, like "wow, he hates this guy??" and maybe one could point out the bonus comic is a version of his mother who thought his dad was endearingly silly (instead of anything being signs of a problem), but the dad's flaws just arent seriously acknowledged by the narrative. He comes across as both a victim, and a cold authority, which doesnt make sense.

Honestly, it reminds me of the opposite of this dunmeshi comic w laios' father. The father isn't evil, but his lack of communication hurts laios, and the fandom interpreted this as laios being overdramatic bc they compared him to... his sister who thought her mom's crazy tactics to "cure" her daughter were fun. ryoko kui does a good job of making characters complex, and the dad is portrayed objectively here, but mokumoku len definitely makes yoshiki's dad not seem very serious, like we're supposed to think there's smth serious going on, then no, he's just a poor man baby whose scared of his wife

#personal #hgsn spoilers #hgsn #hikaru ga shinda natsu #im not gonna say men cant get abused but i think canonically she wants to speak with him abt their daughter skipping school #and he doesnt have much to say and that frustrates her and he eventually snaps when pressed then leaves. which solves nothing #hes actually the one who was shown to damage things too which is a red flag u cant exactly cover up. #shes not exactly being a scary evil threatening wife by wanting to talk lol. it might be the translation but the wording of 'its scary' #vs 'im scared' makes it feel different? like i get he's being kinda honest but uhhh. thats your WIFE. why are u married bro #its just a very strange perspective? he's somehow pathetic enough to be intimidated (of normal topics that will occur in a family) #but its kinda presented like smth good happened here when the dad's created an incredibly strange situation. wdym ur avoiding ur wife. #and ur son hates that. theres no mention of his relationship w the daughter. the dad offering yoshiki his books is meant to show #a positive in their relationship but its just for the plot atm not their personal relationship. he doesnt actually change there

[jitterbugjive]

Hi, Jack. Ask Princess Molestia was deleted years ago, Jay recently announced that Lil Miss Rarity is rebooting and transitioning to an original story, and you have finished Discorded Whooves. With this, every blog that I joined Tumblr for, over 10 years ago, has either ended or been removed. I just want to say thank you for getting me on the one website I can tolerate, and especially thank you for putting up with me. I'm sure the younger version of myself that followed you initially was annoying, so I'm grateful I was allowed to grow and change on my own, rather than have that change forced upon me by being blocked or publicly humiliated or anything. Everything that has happened to me because of Tumblr has been because of you, Jay, and JohnJoseco, and for that, I am only grateful, it has only been good things. Or at least, the things that matter have only been good things. Any bad memories have since faded.

You should be proud of the work you put in. I feel that Discorded Whooves is an icon of the Tumblr pony community, and that community's intersection with Doctor Who. I'm glad it existed, and I'm glad you made it exist.

I don't really know what I'm trying to say here besides "thank you" and "you did good". It's a bit of a shocker for me, really, that I still care, especially considering I haven't been into ponies really since like 2016 or so. But I do. So thank you, you did a good job.

Yeah it feels like this marks the end of the classic tumblr pony era, all the old stuff is gone or ended and Discord Whooves was kinda the last one standing it seems. I could be wrong and there might be some stragglers left, but I don't think any of the big ones are around any more and I don't think any new ones will get as big as the classics did.

It's kind of sad to see how far tumblrpon has fallen, and how inactive it is save for a few people who are still trying and I wish them all luck because it's not going to be as easy as it was back then to catch an audience of pony fans.

[kindlespice]

🍉 actual hiatus 🍉

hi hi! so... it's been a while! *checks notes* i have not posted since august... of last year x.x i've been lurking around a bit occasionally dropping likes here and there, but for the most part been entirely absent. i feel like it's wayyyy past time for me to check-in, let everybody know i'm okay and all that jazz. but i am declaring this an actual hiatus now

tl;dr

i lost the simblr itch, i thought "surely it will come back" but it never came back and now i'm hyperfixating on other things.

i'm gonna put specifics under a read more if anyone's that interested in what i've been doing, what i will be doing, where i'll be hanging out now, etc. but it's really nothing big or major--just interests changing.

⭐ my content + patreon

(since it's kinda important and i want everyone to be able to see this) i'm not deleting this account and i'm still keeping my content up both on patreon and sfs! you will still be able to download things for free!!! i will be deleting my patreon tier! even though it was basically a donation tier, i feel bad keeping it up knowing i'm consciously not making more sims content (or being really active in the community) for the foreseeable future i'll be reaching out to existing patrons and making a similar post over there as well about the tier change!

i also wanna say thank you to everyone who's ever followed, donated, liked, commented, messaged, lurked or just been sweet and kind to me ❤️! simblr will always have a special place in my heart, so i don't think i'll ever leave leave, but i owe it to you guys to let you know that i'm making the conscious decision to be inactive for some time.

as a closing statement, fk isr*el and i am absolutely 100% without a doubt full stop

AGAINST GENOCIDE AND FOR A 🍉 FREE PALESTINE 🍉

you should be too if you're any kind of decent human being :)

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

⭐what will happen to my account?

nothing really. or at least nothing different from how it's been for the last year and some change XD like i said, i'm still keeping my blogs up, downloads won't move, etc. i am just committing to not actively posting content or really being on simblr that much. maybe i'll drop some likes or comments when the mood hits (like i have been), but not really much else. i guess if there's any questions about this i'll answer them since my active attention will be back on simblr for at least a few days while i clean some things up. i would like to do one last thing as a kind of parting gift at some point... i never did end up cleaning up my downloads page or organize the thumbs/sorting for my cc like i said i would so maybe i'll do that before it gets away from me again but i'm not making any promises

⭐why am i on hiatus?

nothing bad happened or anything, i just.... lost interest. I already wasn't really playing the game that much even when i was super active; i mostly just took pictures and did edits. but i just wasn't having as much fun as i used to, opening the game started feeling like a chore, i wasn't all that inspired to make content, etc. i've burnt out on simblr on many an occasion so i just took a break like i always do but it kept going...and going.......and going.........until i realized it had been FOREVER and i hadn't really felt the itch to create here during that time, it wasn't coming back, and i was having much more fun doing other stuff. the times i did consider coming back it was more bc i felt bad about not creating rather than any actual desire to create. so i had to think long and hard about whether or not i even really wanted to come back. and i flip-flopped for probably 6 months--trying to drum up creative projects and never committing--before coming to the conclusion that i think i just need to call it a hiatus XD

⭐what have i been up to?

annoying my family with boycott lists and making them buy alternatively :D bouncing back and forth between many different hyperfixations... i fell back down the skyrim rabbithole several times, genshin, stardew, acnh, made a million notion pages i'll never use--the usual suspects. BUT BG3! at one point i swore i was gonna come back end of july/early aug but then BG3 dropped early and it was over... i definitely did A LOT of heavy lurking here when the girlies were all posting GORGEOUS tavs omg... i spent a while getting ts3 up and running, even made a sideblog thinking "maybe i'll come back with ts3 content that would be cool!"... just to not end up playing and not using the sideblog and not coming back -.- 4LIENS were supposed to have a comeback like... 4 separate times and it just did not happen... i've been making a concerted effort to get back into drawing and art. i've been in a kind of... depression? slump? with it for years now; always feeling like it wasn't good enough, that i should be better since i'm so "gifted and talented", i should be monetizing it and not "wasting" all that skill, blah blah imposter syndrome blah blah getting frustrated when i'm not 100% perfect all the time blah blah feeling like a disappointment to my family blah blah... but i am HELLA sick and tired of having all this anxiety and fear surrounding something i used to love so much so i'm pushing through! i've been trying out lots of different mediums and actually using my sketchbooks and just generally trying to introduce more fun into the process and stop being so hard on myself all the time. i picked up crocheting for a bit. at this point i haven't touched it in so long i probably forgot how to do it but... maybe one day i'll make a blanket or smth I started journalling (relatively) regularly for a bit. i was feeling really down at several points throughout the year and i thought having daily entries would help combat the feeling like every day was just absolute shit. on the contrary, the majority of days are good--at worst mundane--the bad ones just tend to stick out more. trying to get back into reading again... i miss doing it for leisure and taking notes bc i want to and not because i have a 300 annotation school assignment :P and a whole bunch of other stuff probably but it's hard to remember every single thing that's been on my mind for 16 months lol

⭐what will i be doing / where can you find me now?

i'm hoping to start a webtoon/build up art socials in the new year as a part of my "reconnecting to art" process. i made some art socials @kbearie-art here and @/kbearie_art on insta, youtube, tiktok, and twitter; they're empty for now though bc i got scared the minute i made them and never posted anything -.- but i'll be real with you... twitter is a cesspool, and im not fond of tiktok so i think tumblr, insta and youtube will probably be where i'll dedicate my time i've been thinking about getting back into posting videos on youtube again just in general. in fact this thought was the final push for me to make this post bc i was like... if i post a video out of the blue with no word to simblr that would be fked up XD i play games all the time and i had such a fun time recording, learning to edit and stuff that i think i'd like to pursue that further. i wouldn't be doing sims related stuff though bc...well... i don't play anymore XD but other games ya know. my other youtube is kspice (the same place with my tutorials, speed edits, the acnh vid, etc.) if you'd be interested in that

and i guess that's pretty much it!

again, for at least the next couple of days i'll probably actively have my eyes on this post/simblr in general (and i am gonna clear out my inbox hopefully) so if you have questions i'd ask em quickly before i go back into hiding XD

thanks again, i love you guys, free palestine, and have a good new year! 🍉⭐💖

#now... #is it extra if i change my theme right before i leave for an indefinite period of time? #... #it's never stopped me before! #also i hate this knock-off twitter layout i wanna burn it all down #why can't i put a real line in my text posts anymore i-- #i take it all back #the tumblr changes are the reason i'm on hiatus #>:| #kspice.text

[c00kiejar]

This song...

I've never really made a proper post before, just shitposts and the occasional art thing. I want to make one to properly express how I feel right now and why this song represents it perfectly. I will warn you first, however, that this mentions a certain YouTuber who was recently completely destroyed on Twitter and my personal experience as a viewer, and may delve into some not-too-happy thoughts

Still here? Let's dive in

It all starts way back when I was still a kid. I was navigating the wonderful site known as YouTube, trying to find videos on videogames and, specifically, I think it was Super Paper Mario. I had no idea how to beat Chapter 2-3 (the Ruby debt one), and I needed help. That's when I stumbled across a YouTuber called Chuggaaconroy (a.k.a. Emile). The way he provided all the information I needed in one video was exactly what I needed. I couldn't subscribe to his channel because I didn't have a Google account, so I just periodically checked his channel, eventually learning he uploaded every day at 5 PM, perfect for younger me. I'd watch his videos when they came out, loving every single one. I eventually discovered his collab channel, The Runaway Guys, and loved that channel even more. He, Proton Jon (Jon) and NintendoCapriSun (Tim) entertained me for YEARS with their content. I even branched out into Jon's streaming community, becoming a semi-regular artist on the booru for a time (you can still find my stuff there under the name TehSm1tty. Not my best work, but I still like some of it). Years come and go, and I have my fair share of mental health troubles, but I'd always find Emile, Jon, and Tim there to brighten my days.

Fast forward to sometime last week. I've been pretty inactive on Twitter aside from my alts, but I decided to see what was popping on main. I log in and get recommended a post with the hashtag "WeStandWithChugga". I had no idea what was going on, so I looked into it. I won't go into detail here, but the jist of it is that Emile was a total creep to many women and even drove wedges between himself and good friends because of this weird behavior. There's a lot more to this than just that, but the point is that it shattered my view of him. I knew he was pushy and that always kinda annoyed me, but the extent of it broke me. For a few days now, I've been having a rough go of it. I mean, my childhood YouTuber just got outed as a complete creep and has some serious allegations of being at least a lolicon, at worst a pedo. I've been down and out for days, and it just wouldn't stop. That is, until I found out that Tim has a Reddit account. I never knew this (or, well, maybe I did and just forgot. Idfk), and was amazed to learn that Tim's been keeping Reddit updated on what he's able/willing to share. Turns out Emile's getting the help he needs at a legit mental hospital and that he's ok. That's what made everything stop. Hearing he's ok. After all the shit Emile has done, he's still a human being and doesn't deserve to have the whole internet turn on him in a fraction of a second. Hearing a fellow human is ok made me feel better. I'm not letting him off the hook, and I do not believe he should ever be forgiven for what he's done, but if he is willing to better himself and become a better person, I am more than willing to believe in that Emile.

Now to come to roughly 40 minutes ago. I decide to boot up Satisfactory and play a bit, but I have no idea what to listen to while I do. I put on a song but quickly get bored of it, and then I see "OMORI | Do You Remember? | Extended" in my recommendations. I put it on and instantly, as if I were splashed in the face by water, I wake up and feel better. I was still stressed about everything going on (I'm set to go to college in September, AND my folks are headed to Mexico in about a week, so I'm stressed from those too), but with the first note on the piano, everything faded. All my swirling negative emotions were replaced with a somber peace. I'm still hurt by the last week's revelations, and I'm never going to truly recover (who could?), but I'm moving on. I think my comment on the video describes how I feel best; "The sad yet peaceful feeling this song evokes in me... It's pretty much how I feel today. I feel at peace... or, well, mostly. There's still pain, and there always will be, but I can move on and I'll live. In the future, I'll look back on this last week and feel sad, but that'll be in the future when this is all over with for good, so I can also look back at before it and be happy that those good times happened. Nothing will ever be the same, but such is the way of the world. Saying goodbye is saying hello to the future, and we all need to do that eventually. Who knows what the future may hold? I, for one, can't wait to see. Hello future, and goodbye sadness".

Chuggaaconroy was an inspiration and a light in the sea of darkness for so, so many, and these revelations have snuffed the light he provided out. What I hope is that Emile takes a long, long break from the internet to become the person we all believed him to be, to truly become that bright light in the dark, rather than just another dark figure holding a flashlight. I don't hope for that as a supporter of him as I don't support who he is right now (as if I haven't said it enough), I hope for that as a fellow human who only wishes to see everyone become the best version of themself.

I think this post was exactly what I needed. I've finally gotten everything out in a cohesive (maybe?) and healthy manner, and I'm ready to become my best self. I will be beginning work on YouTube videos tomorrow, and will hopefully be posting Thursdays at 5 PM (in honor of DatPags whom has not uploaded in a long time).

To anyone who finished reading this post, thank you. From the bottom of my heart, thank you. Please, go become your best self, but do not do so by putting others down. Better yourself and acknowledge your flaws, overcome them, and do not repeat Emile's mistakes. Learn from those around you.

Yours truly,

Cookie_Jar of Tumblr dot com

#music #peaceful yet sad #twitter drama #youtuber #omori #moving on #the end of an era #chuggaaconroy #the runaway guys #trg

[panbotter]

Guys don't laugh at me but I've been so inactive on Tumblr for so long, but more specifically, I've been a lurker for so long

I never reblogged anything bc I was afraid I'd be judged (insane concept on Tumblr of all places).

But then I looked at all the cool niche blogs and all the communities that fanfic writers build and I was like :(((( I want to have a very niche void I shout into every now and then and sometimes it'll echo back with a "me too!"

And now that I kinda dived in headfirst with x men and now there's so much interaction going on and I'm having a really good time and I'm just glad I have a place I can act absolutely insane and it's expected.

Thank you for stopping by, liking, reblogging, and commenting :)))))

We're all sitting in a room together shouting things at each other and pointing at pictures of our blorbos while going "!!!!!!!!!!" at each other.

#x men 97 #x men #xmen #Tumblr #niche #hellsite #lurker gone active #i feel a sense of community and thats weird bc i can never find that anywhere online lately #like everything i interact with online is just me lurking and liking things and never saying anything #i never post or anything #but here i am #hello guys let's be friends

[butchniqabi]

totally ignore this if you'd like! i'm just kinda lost tbh and i'd love to hear about your own experience and point of view

i began to realize i might be bi around 2 years ago and i've found it incredible turbulent trying to reconcile being a muslim woman and experiencing attraction to other women at the same time. i'm still struggling with my sexuality and a lot of internalized stuff and i'm trying to work on it but i guess i don't really know how i'm supposed to go about this?

again, please ignore this if you'd like, and i'm sorry if you get asks like these all the time </3

full disclaimer i was not born muslim, i converted when i was 14/15-ish for [list of reasons] and part of what convinced me was tumblr user @homojabi who has sadly been inactive for many years now, but they have a lot of resources when it comes to countering homophobic/transphobic rhetoric. you might want to check out their blog for more in depth answers to the common "what about"s of islam.

im not really a great person to answer these questions because i honestly feel that there is no conflict in me being a gay/trans muslim and havent really experienced many hang-ups about my identity. my best advice is to remember that islam has been influenced by hundreds of years of politics and stopped being practiced how the prophet (saw) practiced it after he died. genuinely, a lot of awful rhetoric in islam comes from hadith which while some can be considered "reputable", many are just "this person said he heard the prophet (saw) say this one time". i remember reading that even just a few decades after the prophet's (saw) death there were THOUSANDS of fake hadiths floating around. islam is practiced by human beings and human beings have biases, hidden agendas, and political aspirations. no two people practice islam the same, our relationship with it is going to be different. does that make sense?

i think you should surround yourself with lgbt muslims both online and (if possible) in person. in the past decade a lot more resources for lgbt muslims have popped up, you may have to look for them but they're there. community is a big healer.

remember that you can talk to me at any time, my inbox and dms are open to lgbt muslims always.

#asks #i hope this helps a little bit...

[yabsthesquare]

holy shit its you i remember you from jsab amino.......

Yeah your user rings a bell! :0 I def remember you too lmao

It's been a while! Hello :] Hope you're doing well

For anyone who doesn't know I started out in the jsab fandom when the jsab amino was just born back in 2018

(I'm still there but inactive, because the community kinda died out lol)

I've settled on instagram and I'm pretty comfy there, but I also wanna have moots here because Tumblr has a better algorithm (so hello jsab people! 👉👈)

#just shapes and beats #hello jsab people #im kinda shy sorry

[risu5waffles]

Who, or What, is a risuko?

Tagged by@candybagcj , transfemme Alan Wake. Alaina? Would that be Alaina?

Who were you named after?

Like most trans gals, i'm named after myself. i honestly didn't realize it would work out to be squirrel girl until it was far too late. i was just thinking i was being clever wiv bilingual numbers puns.

Last time you cried?

i don't remember, and this is honestly a bit of a problem for me. i kinda feel like it would be a healthier if i could just have a good, honest cry for once. Oh! Wait, i do remember! But it's not really a public consumption story, sorry.

Do you have kids?

No. Steps were taken. There are a few folx in my community young enough to be my kids, and i only hope i have been a positive parental-adjacent person in their lives. That's an honest hope, they're good kids (tho', i think the youngest of that lot is a whole-ass adult now. How time flies).

What sports do you play/did you play?

Zilch, nada, none. Not very sporty, me. i tried a couple when i was a real wee squirrel, but none of them really stuck. i do like biking around and walking, so i'm not completely inactive.

Do you use Sarcasm?

Not as much as i used to, honestly. i've made an effort to get out of the habit. Partly because it doesn't really track well in Japanese, and partly because i think Whedon-esque/mst3k-style 90's snark is a bane. i'm well tired of social masks, and happy to be quit of them (medical masks, tho', those are great).

First thing you notice about people?

Fashion and ink, how they hold their bodies. My aversion to looking at people's faces has only gotten worse as i've gotten older.

Do you have any talents?

i was a dab hand at embalming way back in the day, and i can still walk through all the steps in my head.

Scary Movies or Happy Endings?

Or, hear me out, scary movies wiv happy endings. i'm not against a total party wipe, and can appreciate them when they're done well. But i do like it when we can over come the metaphorical horrors, it happens so seldom in meatspace, you know? Also, i am morally obligated to mention here that the 1988 version of The Blob is one of the best movies ever, and is both scary and has a happy ending.

Where were you born?

i'm adopted, so i couldn't tell you wiv any real granularity. Blacksburg Virginia, US is as close as i can get you. Not a big city, tho', can't be that many hospitals. Unless i was born in a ditch. i'd honestly like it if i were a ditchwater baby.

What are your hobbies?

Creating in LittleBigPlanet (full series); wiv the official servers for 3 being down i've gone back to 1 & 2 to see how well i can do in those Create Modes; it's been fun. Trying to work up the courage to jailbreak my ps3 to get on the private servers, but fucking up my console or account isn't an expense i can really afford at the mo.

Do you have any pets?

i have a rat skeleton named Sydney who i rescued from a school i was demolishing (as part of a job, mind you. i didn't just rock up to some random school and start wailing away wiv a crowbar). i love her dearly, and have only fed her blood the couple of times.

How tall are you?

Oh! i just had a medical checkup, so i know this one; i am officially 178cm and some change.

What was your favourite subject in school?

Forensic Science in uni. We got to handle bones. i got to read through Spitz & Fisher's Medicolegal Investigation of Death. My prof had an entirely healthy fascination wiv kaiju (this was prior to coming to Japan, and in the 90's, so a bit more unusual than if i'd gone to school here).

Dream Job?

Embalming. Or at least something involving corpses. i get the dead way better than i get the living. And no corpse has ever called me fag (pejorative).

Who to tag, who to tag. Hrmm @soupum & @jacechaotic , but only to the extent you want to answer any of this, of course!

#risuko talks squirrel

[catsconflictscopicsandchamomile]

hey tumblr! hot tip!!! if you see people criticizing your fav actor/creator/celeb etc for a lack of support for Palestine and want to get big mad abt it:

ask yourself, deeply and truly, why this makes you angry. really. why does that make you angry? look in the mirror and ask yourself why.

Don't pull out the following terms: "keyboard warrior", "what have YOU done lately besides be high and mighty on the internet?", "double standards", "this is The Internet(tm) Of Course Words Matter More Than Actions", etc. because uh

NEWSFLASH DIP SHITS

THE PERSON YOU ARE TALKING TO MAY HAVE

JUST POSSIBLY

DONE THINGS FOR THE MOVEMENT THAT COULD GET THEM IN LEGAL TROUBLE IF ADMITTED

HELD OFF POLICE AT COLLEGE ENCAMPMENTS

STAYED OUT ALL NIGHT TO HOLD SPACE

GONE WITHOUT FOOD SO THEY COULD AFFORD TO DONATE

GONE WITHOUT CHORES/OTHER NECCESARY TASKS TO MAKE TIME FOR PROTESTS

*SEEN THEIR FRIENDS DRAGGED AWAY BY RIOT POLICE*

*WITHIN THE PAST TWO WEEKS*

WAITED FOR THEIR FRIENDS TO GET BACK FROM FUCKING JAIL

AND STILL KEPT SHOWING UP.

UNTIL THEY WORKED THEMSELVES TO ILLNESS.

you dont know who I am. you don't know what I'm doing. at the same goes for anyone and everyone on this site. sure, maybe they're the soyjak sjw you're picturing, marinating in sweat and dorito crumbs while they sip boba surrounded by plushies and obscure pride flags, wallowing in self-centered hypocrisy

or maybe they're not. maybe they shaved all their hair off because they had too much on-camera recognition and feared being followed home by cops, like had happened to their peers.

maybe they've been manhandled and shoved by security and police recently.

maybe they're endangering the scholarships that are their only reason to live rather than stay silent on their college's ties to the military-industrial complex.

maybe they lie to their parents and family friends and ANY older friends about where they are in the evening because they know that the truth could destroy those relationships

maybe they're Jewish and struggling to understand how their community can be so unable to see the reality of the situation

I'm not saying I'm doing The Most Ever, or even that I'm doing a lot. I'm not, not by my community's standards, not in comparison to my friends and peers, and especially not currently as im dealing with finals. I'm just showing up and doing what I can, even though it isnt much.

and I'm not going to assume that anyone saying this bs ALSO isnt doing anything for the movement

maybe you are! if so, thats great!

but fucking think before you speak because you have literally no idea who you're talking to or what their life is like. even if you're doing The Most Bestest Possible Ever for the movement rn, online and off 24/7

you have no right to pass judgement based on what you ASSUME about a stranger.

you have no right and no reason to think that anyone who "complains" online is thus inactive irl, in fact that makes literally no sense.

if you're really about genuine activism and radical action and support of this movement. why are you being a dick to people for speaking out?

and if you're not. if you just think that we're a bunch of whiny hypocrites looking for a reason to get on your high horse....

then man you are just a waste of life im sry idk what to tell u. get off tumblr, do some research, change yourself. "get better soon bestie" or something idk i dont even have words for that kinda brainlessness.

I'm just saying, I don't think the cops, or the president of my university, or the security and event staff at (REDACTED) would call me a "keyboard warrior" lmaoooooo

#free palestine #keyboard warriors #sjw #palestine #gaza #israel #tumblr culture #hellsite #tumblrcore #tw vent #tw rant #im PISSED rn im sry #i dont come on My Comfort Site to be called a keyboard warrior.

[leminhthinking]

"add something, if youd like" ok, here is something i used a throwaway account to comment on the Double MV. i didnt reread so i didnt remember anything about it sorry but there probably is mention about internalized ableism. also personal experience. its kinda shaped like a rant

posting it here now that i came out about being plural here. yeah.

tldr (theres another tldr at the end of it but it was from the time i commented and i want to add something else here) i love representations

I keep finding myself wanting to comment something under this video, but I know I'll say stuffs about myself that I feel would be unsafe to share using my main so I'm using this throwaway account to do it instead 😔

I just want to say that I'm so grateful that Mikoto and John (and maybe other alters in their system too? saying this just in case) were ever written. Being a system who had just discovered that only over a year ago, I can almost see myself, no, I can almost see *us* in every part of their story up until now. And in a way, I feel like I've also... grown with them? If that makes sense?

I have been following MILGRAM for quite a while, enough to be there when MeMe was just released. Back then, I still thought that I was certainly a singlet (didn't have DID), despite how one of my alters - I will refer to her as my sister from now - showed up pretty regularly at the time. That's why when I watched MeMe, I remember thinking to myself, "oh shit, this guy's just like me, and because [insert internalized ableism here] I'm saying he guilty then." But then we all know what's got confirmed 😂 Funniest thing is, a short while before that, I also came to term about being a system. Dammit, to think about it, it felt like a second confirmation 😭😭😭😭

Now that I have accepted who we really are, the release of Double and their second voice drama feels exceptionally special to me, as the host of our system. John and Mikoto's situation right now really reminds me of us last year. My sister and I specifically, respectively. At that time, I tried hard to deny the fact that I am not alone in my head, and that we are entirely separate people. It took me a while (with a few tarot spreads. fuck. I'm a Mikoto kinnie now) to know that we actually are... and some actual, honest conversations to know that she actually loved me, rather than wanting to harm me... Yeah. Yeah. You see what I'm talking about? That's why I'm really rooting for Mikoto and John to have better communication... Ah, maybe if Mikoto watched "his" own second trial MV, he would understand...

That being said, I'm still not sure on what to vote... When I first watched Double and listened to the second voice drama, I thought to myself, ouch, ok, guilty because John clearly seems to be the alter who knows more right now and that would keep him fronting more to interrogate. But after a while, my opinion... changed? I don't want Mikoto to be affected too much from the verdict and maybe going dormant because of that. John maybe still there for the interrogation but fuck, I don't think he's ever been without Mikoto for a long time and I'd hate to see his heart breaks. Maybe innocent is the better solution after all for the whole system, as it might soothe Mikoto's mood and his mindset. I also trust that MILGRAM's writer team know what they are doing and therefore would not "kill off" John. Maybe they will just let him be inactive for a while if they are voted innocent, given that he's finally satisfied with our decision...

(Yes, I do know innocent = forgiven and guilty = not forgiven and I'm deciding while knowing that. I'm just calling them innocent and guilty because I'm more used to it while speaking in English.)

Hmm, that was a longer rant than I expected. I don't know how to conclude really, so I'll say something that would sound entirely unrelated 😔 If I remember correctly, prisoners can hear us audiences right? If that's really true, I just want to scream to Mikoto and John that it's 100% ok to be a system! To not be alone inside your mind! To exist alongside another person in your system and love them! It's ok to just be yourselves! And please please please fucking find a way to communicate with each other!!!

Once again, thank you MILGRAM for letting them exist... I really hold them so dearly in our heart...

TL;DR: local system getting emotional over Mikoto and John, rooting for them to have better communication.

#leminhthinking in paragraphs #leminhtalking #milgram #its so funny that when i come look at the tags in my blog milgram appeared to be the one at the top and then umineko #like i didnt expect that but. Ok. i should have expected that