#i trust the mum a lot she’s studying to be a nurse practitioner right now and she’s incredibly covid conscious. but the kids go to school

[iliveinprocrasti-nationn]

so turns out my brain was not chilling out on interpreting being around other people as a constant threat and it was just waiting for another trigger to come back full force

#i went over to babysit as i usually do in the evening and the mom was like ‘yeah [oldest] was throwing up a bit this morning but he has no #fever or anytbing and he’s been fine the rest of the day’ and i wouldn’t be surprised at all of this was just a little kids stomach #deciding to turn over and not any sickness. but now im shut down sitting in my bathroom and trying not to cry #i trust the mum a lot she’s studying to be a nurse practitioner right now and she’s incredibly covid conscious. but the kids go to school #and daycare because her husband works from early in the morning and comes home at about 8 at night and she can’t get her doctorate and take #care of three kids. and while their family might be careful the other kids at daycare might not be at all #and im just. exhausted. break ends in about three weeks and im not ready for this year #i know im going to end up losing it again but i just wish i could step out of my house without feeling like im under attack by breathing #vent tw