#i told my frienfs the other day abt this guy i was abt 2 have sex with but then he didnt have any condoms so ofc it didnt happen and one of

[songtwo]

Naur my mom was looking 4 some goggles but i was in class so i told her 2 look in my drawers and she didn't find them so i went 2 look and there was a condom in one of them 😭

#shes mexican and a devoted catholic btw 😔 #anyway its so funny bc that condom is ANCIENT its been there since i was in high school 😭😭😭 #i didnt even know it was there like its so funny bc some guy gave me like . 15 condoms once as a joke #and so i gave most away and i kept a few but idk . i didnt even remember one still existed . and in my drawer 😭 #if she asks its gonna be so funny im gonna be like . a guy in high school gave them 2 me as a joke but i never used them #why does everytime i tell the truth it sounds so fake 😭 #i lie 2 her a lot so by now she should know that when my story is simple and normal that means im lying #and when it sounds like im making shit up im actually telling the truth #i told my frienfs the other day abt this guy i was abt 2 have sex with but then he didnt have any condoms so ofc it didnt happen and one of #them was like well now u gotta start carrying ur own . gonna tell them this now #they dont that story omg its so funny like he gave them 2 me in a fucking cup #and a Huge one it's my mom's favorite 😭 #and he like sticked them all over it . high school boys #naur first she finds my cigarettes and now this . im never coming home again #now shes gonna think i fucked in my room like thats literally never happened and never will bc every1 in this family is insane #like my grandma thinking i was gonna fuck my french prof . like im flattered bc hes rly hot but everyone here is insane