#i really don’t wanna bring drama into this group cayse i like everyone and would want to continue to be friends with everyone for a long tim

[roaringroa]

i can feel myself starting to develop feelings for someone i really shouldn’t. please don’t do this @ myself. it’s not gonna end well

#it’s a friend i’ve been steadily getting closer and closer to since we first met last year #she’s so sweet and cute and hard working #honestly ever since i met her i knew i could come to like her like that if i don’t stop myself #but i want to stop myself cause this is not gonna end well #for starters she’s had like 3 friends confess to her ever since i met her #and she’s ranted at me about that abd tild me she could never date a friend #second of all she’s in my uni class (in brazil you do all of your subjects with the same class ib most unis) #which means i have to see her everyday for 3 and a half years unless one of us changes class #so in the offchance that we actually do get together if it doesn’t work out it would suck to either continue seeing her or to change class #even if we don’t break up if we had ocasional fights it’s be so uncomfortable #and third we’re in the same uni friendgrouo and there’s only like 5 of us #i really don’t wanna bring drama into this group cayse i like everyone and would want to continue to be friends with everyone for a long tim #but also one of our friends has been her friend for far far longer and is very protective of her so if something happened i know she’d take #her side. which would be understandable but also i love both of them as friends so i’d be sad to lose both in one go #and fourth: i honest to god feel like i’d end up hurting her if we’d tried anything. i can be so insensitive sometimes #and other times i shut myself in and can’t interact with anyone #and thst already hurts her a little as friends it would be worse if we were together #the main point is still that she wouldn’t want to anyway lol #which is why i have beeb stopping myself whenever i have a though that could stwp outside of platonic territory for a while bow #but lately she’s been spending a considerable amount of time at my house cause hers is far from uni and mine isn’t #so when she leaves uni late and is set to arrive early i offer her to stay here #and i’m pretty sure that because of that my family thinks i have something going on with her that i don’t wanna tell them yet #cause they’ll make this vague comments like saying rhey like her cause she’s talkative unlike my brother’s ex and it’s like?? #and i never know how to respond cause i feel like clarifying we’re not dating would be weirder since no one actually explicitly said anythin #anyway it’s a bit of a mess lol #my post #also not me already knowing how i’s hurt her how our friends would react and how i’d have to change class #just from the thought of maybe crushing on her lol #the good old family inherited anxiety disorder