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#i need this missing moment so bad i'm shaking like a chihuahua
brotherconstant · 1 year
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INTERVIEW WITH THE VAMPIRE 1.06 || Like Angels Put in Hell by God
Are you still dreaming about our first meeting, Daniel? I keep waking up just before you ask me back to your shitty apartment.
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aspd-thoughts · 1 year
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how accurate would you say the main symptom list for aspd is for you? like the list you get when you just look up "aspd symptoms". I'm wondering if i might have it but the symptoms that i see are mainly just agression/hostility, being a 'master manipulator', and hurting people, which isn't really stuff i relate to that much
 Okay, going down the list, based on my personal experience as always:
failure to conform to social norms with respect to lawful behaviors as indicated by repeatedly performing acts that are grounds for arrest.
Bullshit. The law isn’t in our DNA, so the fact that you need to have broken it to be diagnosed is just wrong.
2. deceitfulness, as indicated by repeated lying, use of aliases, or conning others for personal profit or pleasure.
This one is actually pretty true in my case. I’ve told many a lie and stolen a whole heap of junk just for a boost.
3. impulsivity or failure to plan ahead.
Heck yeah. This might just be my ADHD talking, but I really struggle to think beyond the moment, especially long-term. I have near zero life plans as of now, and the ones I do have are shit like “work at an airport at night somewhere because I can never get to sleep”
4. irritability and aggressiveness, as indicated by repeated physical fights or assaults.
This one isn’t true in my experience, at least not in a physical aspect. Verbally though? I’ve been compared to a chihuahua because I will start barking over a perceived slight. So, this one is onto something but missed the mark.
5. reckless disregard for safety of self or others.
others, sometimes, but me? One of the only reasons I consistently resist impulses is because I think things wouldn’t shake out with me on top. I’m a self-driven creature.
6. consistent irresponsibility, as indicated by repeated failure to sustain consistent work behavior or honor financial obligations.
ah, yes, irresponsibility my old friend. This one hits hard.
7. lack of remorse, as indicated by being indifferent to or rationalizing having hurt, mistreated, or stolen from another.
Lack of remorse? Yes, of course. I will never feel bad for shit I did and I can’t change that. Rationalizing hurting people? Eh. If you and me are in an argument, even if I took it a bridge too far, I’m not apologizing. If I stole your pencil case just on a whim, and you catch me? Expect your pencil case back and a written out apology. Unless you’re a teacher. Academic trauma has not inclined me to like those guys. It’s something I’m working on.
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broiderie · 2 years
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Lost Princessa 16
Here we go! Let's meet Mama Loza!
Thank you @drabbles-mc and @iamthegraham for encouragement and letting me bounce ideas off you.
Please don't copy, translate or duplicate my work anywhere else. I'm bad enough on my own. I don't need an echo.
Warnings: cursing, FLUFF, mention of murder... I think that's it but if I missed something please let me know. I'm doing my best to not trigger anyone. Please help me do that. Be responsible for your own media consumption.
Hank held the door open for Megan to enter his mother’s house. He was immediately greeted by the clicking of claws on the hard floor. His mother’s small chihuahua, Chi Chi came to meet him.
Megan relaxed and squatted down to offer the back of her hand for the dog to smell. “Awww. Aren’t you cute!” Chi Chi allowed a few head pets and looked up at Hank in bliss. “What’s the puppy’s name?”
Hank snorted good naturedly. “His name’s Chi Chi and he’s spoiled rotten.”
“Awww. I bet you’re such a good boy, Chi Chi. You are, aren’t you?” She contentedly scratched the dog's ears.
Taza came around the corner laughing. “Well, that cured her nerves, didn’t it?”
Hank’s mother peeped around Taza’s tall form. “Oh leave the poor girl alone, Che. She can’t help it that Loza men are all charming sweethearts.”
Megan immediately stood up and tried to straighten her clothes. “Oh, sorry!” She tucked her hair behind her ears self-consciously.
Hank laughed and moved forward to introduce Megan properly before his mother could scold him for his manners. “Hey, Mom. This is Megan Morales. Megan, this is my mother María Loza.”
Megan offered her hand to shake. “It’s nice to finally meet you, María. Thank you for all the meals you’ve sent me through Hank. They were delicious.”
Mama Loza laughed and bypassed the handshake with a hug. “You are very welcome, Querida. Please, call me Mama. Everyone Hank brings home does.”
Hank kissed his mother’s forehead and laughed as she swiftly and skillfully whisked Megan away from him.
“You boys go set the table out back, and don’t you forget the light the torches. Megan and I will bring out the food in a few minutes.” She shooed Hank and Taza in front of her with a dish towel and guided Megan with a gentle hand on her arm into the kitchen.
Once the men were outside, Mama Loza sat Megan at the kitchen table for a moment. “There now, Querida. It’s been a very long day for you. Dinner still needs a few more minutes, so let me get you a cup of tea. Hank said you like peppermint?”
Megan attempted to stand and help. “Oh, let me…”
“No. No, now you just sit there and catch your breath. Let me spoil you a little. It must be hard to being surrounded by all those men all the time.” She slid a full mug of hot peppermint tea in front of Megan with the jar of honey before joining her with her own cup.
Megan smiled gratefully and stirred some into her tea. “It’s not bad at all. If anything they’re going to make me spoiled.”
Mama laughed. “From what I hear, you could use a bit of being spoiled.” She reached for the cookie jar and offered Megan a cookie. “There now. Hank told me a little bit about your past.”
Megan smiled and bit into the soft cookie. Chi Chi came and settled across her feet. “Well, Hank is doing his best to be sure I’m the most spoiled girl in Santo Padre. I don’t know who’s worse, him or Taza.”
Mama chuckled eerily like her son. “That’s my boys. That father of yours needs looking after too. It’s why Hank brings him to me so often.”
Megan laughed. “I do get that feeling.”
A timer went off. “Ah. Dinner is ready.” Mama stood and ladled the hearty stew into four bowls. “Would you carry two of these? Everything else should already be outside.”
Megan jumped up to help, disturbing a snoozing Chi Chi. “Of course!”
“Good girl. Straight through that door to the left…”
Megan took the two largest bowls and carefully carried them to the torchlit patio behind the Loza house. She found Hank and Taza with glasses of lemonade at a small square table set for four. She smiled and placed the bowls in front of the two men as Mama brought two more out for herself and Megan.
“Oh! My tea!” Megan popped back inside to retrieve the warm cup of tea.
Mama kissed Hank’s forehead softly. “You’re a good boy, and you’re right. That girl needs loving.”
Megan came back out, smiling and carrying both her mug and Mama’s.
“Thank you, Querida. Sit. Let’s eat.”
The four sat and ate dinner. Megan quickly relaxed into Mama Loza’s friendly nature and giggled as Hank’s mother told embarrassing stories about him as a boy. When Taza tried to defend Hank in one of the stories of him as a young man, Mama Loza began including embarrassing things she knew about HIM into her stories.
Eventually the food was eaten. Megan had cheerfully taken seconds of the hearty stew and it made Hank proud to see her finally eating properly.
“So- Hank told me you were planning to give Megan a Quince type party, Che. What can I do to help?” Mama eventually asked.
“Well, Mama, Megan was raised by all white foster families. She’s not been taught the traditions from the cradle. I was hoping you’d be willing to help with the more feminine traditions…” Taza said, leaning back in his chair.
“Of course!” She looked at Megan. “Hank mentioned you are a bit of a tomboy and don’t know how to walk in heels. I’ll help you learn… oh and how to manage your skirts, too. I have a trick for that.” She winked at Megan slyly.
“I’d certainly be grateful for any help you can give me. I don’t think I’ve worn a dress since I was a small child. Jeans are always easier and boots last longer than women’s shoes.” Megan shrugged self-consciously.
Mama tsked at her. “Don’t worry, Chica. I grew up with all brothers too. I didn’t learn these things until just before my Quince either.” She reached and patted Megan’s hand. “Don’t you worry now.”
“If you can stay balanced on a galloping horse who turns on a dime, heels should be no problem, Chica.” Taz grinned.
“Maybe - but I don’t have to dance on horseback!” Megan pointed out with an eye roll.
“Oh, is that what worries you?” Mama asked cheerfully. When Megan nodded, Mama brushed it off. “Not a problem. My Hank is an excellent dance partner. He will help you.”
“Mama… I haven’t exactly asked to be her escort yet…” Hank pointed out carefully.
Mama passed him a scathing look. “Boy! What are you waiting for?! The Second Coming?!” She muttered about having raised him better than that in Spanish.
Taza snorted into his glass of lemonade.
Hank sighed and ran a hand down his face embarrassed. “I was waiting until you met her properly, Mama, as YOU taught me I should.”
Megan giggled and ran a hand down his arm to sooth him. He caught it and squeezed it gently with a grin at her.
“Well then - she can’t make an educated decision if she’s never danced with you, Mijo.” She briskly stacked dishes. “Che, you come help me clean up while my son proves he can dance with your girl.”
Taza stood laughing and said, “Yes, ma’am!” as he took the dishes inside.
Mama reached and turned the patio radio to a latin station before flapping her dish towel at them. “Go on. There’s a good flat spot in the yard…” then she went inside and shut the screen door.
Megan threw her head back and laughed at the dumbstruck look on Hank’s face.
“Did you get the license plate of that bus my mother just threw me under?” he muttered laughing.
“Nope, but I believe my father was driving it!” She giggled again.
He smiled and stood before offering her his hand. “C’mon, Princessa. I promised you we’d find somewhere to dance…”
She grinned and slipped her hand into his. “Bet you didn’t expect it to be in your mom's back yard.”
He led her just to the edge of the torchlight with a gentle hand. “Not really, but I’ll take what I can get.”
He pulled her close and guided her into a causal frame before leading her into a gentle dance to the rhythm of the radio. At first she was focused on not stepping on him and couldn’t relax into it. She kept trying to watch her feet.
“Easy, Princessa. You’re doing fine.” He released her waist to guide her chin up. “Here. Watch my eyes. Don’t worry about your feet. Let your body follow mine.” When she locked eyes with him, he smiled and replaced his hold on her waist. “Good girl. Don’t look away.” She relaxed into his hold with a smile and soon found herself easily following Hank’s lead.
The song changed to a faster pace and he grinned mischievously before guiding both her hands to the back of his neck and pulling her closer. He dropped both hands to her hips and showed her a quicker salsa step. Once she’d caught the rhythm and relaxed, she naturally moved her hips to the beat.
Hank laughed and caught her hand to spin her carefully out and then back in. She giggled. “Again?” he asked.
She nodded happily and spun with him again.
Neither of them realized that Taza and María had loaded the dishwasher and then moved back out to the patio with coffee and cookies. The older pair watched as their children danced to several songs before Taza stood and offered Mama his hand. “C’mon, Mama, let’s show them how to really dance!” Mama laughed but allowed Taza to guide her out onto the backyard dance floor.
Eventually, another slow song came on and Taza and Mama retired back to the patio.
Hank pulled Megan back close to his chest and guided her into a soft sway. “Still think Mama won’t like you, Princessa?” he asked quietly.
Megan rested her cheek against the warm leather of his kutte. “Your mom is an amazing woman, Hank. Thank you for introducing me to her.”
“Told you you’d get along. She really likes you too.”
She looked up at him. “Really?”
“Yes, really. I think she’ll disown me if I mess this up.” He smiled down at the tiny girl swaying in his arms. “Speaking of - now that you’ve properly met Mama - how would you like to go on that official date?”
Megan chuckled softly. “Just tell me when.”
“Lunch? Tomorrow?”
“Sounds perfect.”
When Megan started to yawn, Hank reluctantly let her go and guided her back up the patio steps. “You’ve had a long day, Princessa. We should probably get you home.”
Taza smiled. “She’s not the only one.” He stood from his seat. “Thank you, Mama, for a wonderful dinner.” He hugged the small grey-haired woman.
“You know you’re always welcome here, Che.” She stood to hug Megan as well. “And you - you just come over whenever, Preciosa. My door is always open and if it isn’t Hank has a key.”
“Thank you, Mama, for everything. I’ll be by when things calm down a bit.” Megan hugged her tightly.
“Do you need anything else tonight, Mama? Taza still shouldn’t ride alone, so I’ll probably crash at his place again tonight.” Hank kissed his mother and hugged her gently.
“No, mi dulce niño. Get your Princessa home safe. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Alright. Call me if you need me.”
“I will. Buenas noches, hijo.”
“Buenas noches, Mama.”
They made their way to the bikes and rode to the ranch in sleepy silence.
Megan used the time to try to process a little bit of what happened during the day. It seemed like a lifetime ago that she’d pulled her gun on Creeper at the car crusher, but in reality it had just been that morning. She had faced the absolute demon from her nightmares this evening and knew that he was finally conquered. She’d met some of the most dangerous men in the world in the process and hadn’t let it break her. Finally, she’d met the mother of the man who made her feel safe and cared for, and had come to admire her for her kind heart and loving nature. All of this in less than twenty-four hours. There was a reason for her to be exhausted.
As they pulled onto the gravel road to the ranch, Hank patted her hands where they were wrapped tightly around him. “Nearly there, Princessa.”
She squeezed gently and smiled against the leather of his kutte.
They parked under the covered carport, only to find another bike already there. Someone had sent EZ to wait for them to get home. He was seated on the porch steps reading a worn paperback by the light of the front porch light.
“Everything alright there, Prospect?” Taza asked as Hank led Megan up with an arm around her shoulders.
“Yes sir, Taza. We called Frankie. Bishop wanted you to know that you should be expecting a call tomorrow morning. Everything went perfectly.”
Taza nodded. “Alright then. You good to drive or you crashing in floor?”
“I’m good. If you don’t need anything, I’m gonna head to my dad’s.” At Taza’s nod EZ smiled. “Alright. See you in the morning.” He skipped down the stairs and cranked up his bike to drive off.
“C’mon, sweetheart. Let’s get you to bed.” Taza guided Megan into the house with Hank’s help. Once inside he nudged her, half asleep, towards her room.
She turned to look at Hank.
He gently kissed her forehead before letting her go. “Sleep well, Princessa. See you in the morning.”
A few hours later Hank stirred on the couch. He’d heard something. Just as he was about to doze off again, he heard it again. A muffled sob.
He was up in a flash and stumbling for Megan’s room. They should have known she’d have a reaction tonight. He knocked softly on her closed door before opening it a crack. “Princessa, you okay?” He peeked around the door to see her with her face buried in her pillow, shoulders shaking.
He slipped in and closed the door before going to sit on the side of her mattress. “Hey now, come ‘ere. Shh. I got you.” He pulled her carefully into his lap as he shifted to put his back to the headboard. She immediately buried her face in his tattooed chest and wrapped her arms around him. He held her close and stroked her hair. “I’ve got you, Princessa. Just breathe.”
After a few minutes her sobs calmed, but he kept petting her hair down her back until her breathing was even again. He had her secured under his chin and kept murmuring reassurances to her.
Megan sniffled and released him enough to wipe her face. “Sorry. Didn’t mean to wake you.”
Hank shook his head and kept soothing her. “It’s alright, Princessa. You had one hell of a day. It had to come out somehow.”
“I’m not sad he’s dead. Is that wrong? Does that make me a bad person?”
Hank shifted her in his lap so he could look down into her red, swollen eyes. “No, Princessa. It’s not wrong and you’re not a bad person. He tried to kill you. He hurt you. A LOT. He forced you into a marriage to save his own skin. I don’t even want to THINK about what he used that ‘husband’ role to do to you.” He tightened his hold on her as his temper rose at that thought, but only kissed her hair. “He deserved everything that happened to him and more.”
She nodded a little. “I dreamed he found me here. That he came for me again.” She wrapped her fingers in the green beads of the rosary around his neck and rubbed it. “Sorry I woke you.”
He shook his head again. “I’m not. You shouldn’t deal with shit alone. You NEVER have to be sorry for waking me when you’re frightened, Princessa. Whatever you need. I’m all in.” He suddenly realized that he was sitting there shirtless with his girl in his lap wearing less clothes than he’d ever seen her in. She was in a Harley tank top and short sleep shorts and he could see much more of her skin than he was used to. He took a deep breath and tried to refocus on her and not just the feeling of her legs straddling him. Seeing the bruising on her collarbone and some on her waist where her tank top rode up grounded him again. “That bastard is dead, Princessa. He is very dead if Coco got his way and staged the car fire. He will never hurt you again. And in my opinion he got off fucking lucky because Bishop promised you he’d be dead by the end of the night.” He lifted her chin again to look her face over carefully. “No one will ever hurt you and get away with it again, Megan. I promise you.”
She watched his face for a second before she nodded and melted back against his bare chest. “Will you stay with me a little while?”
“Of course. Anything you need.” He kissed her head gently and then shifted to lay them down pulling her blanket over them both. “Rest, Princessa. I’ve got you.”
She nuzzled close and he swore he felt her lips on his skin as she relaxed. She was exhausted between the day and her nightmare adrenaline. He quickly felt her drift off with her fingers still tangled in his necklace and her ear pressed over his heartbeat. He couldn’t bring himself to leave her, so he closed his eyes and settled in to sleep the rest of the night with his Princessa in his arms.
Hank awoke to sun coming through a crack in the curtains in Megan’s room. He could feel her sleeping practically on top of him and smiled a bit. He peeked through half closed eyelids to find she hadn’t moved from where she fell asleep except to tuck her leg between his. His own hand was tangled in her long hair at the base of her skull.
A quiet knock on the door as it cracked open drew his attention to a smiling Taza in her doorway. “Rough night?” he whispered.
“She had a nightmare. You get the call?” Hank asked quietly as he detangled his fingers so he could stroke the hair off her face.
“Yeah, got an appointment with Frankie at the morgue at ten.”
“Good. Maybe seeing the bastard dead will stop her from thinking he’s coming for her in the middle of the night.” He glanced at his watch to see it was only seven. “Let’s let her sleep a while longer. I don’t know how long she was up in the middle of the night before I found her.”
“Alright. I’ll make coffee.” Taza smiled down at his sleeping daughter and slipped back out the door, leaving it open so he could hear if they called for him.
About a half hour later, Hank felt Megan stirring under his stroking hand. He’d been playing with her hair while she slept. She snuggled closer and then stretched like a cat against him with the cutest little whine he’d ever heard.
“Morning, Princessa. Sleep okay?”
“Mmmhmm.” She nodded, but didn’t open her eyes.
“Good. We gotta get up soon though. Taza got the phone call and they need you to ID Jimmy’s body at ten. It’s about 7:30 now.” He shifted to look down at her on his chest.
“‘Kay. You’re warm.” She started thracing one of his tattoos idly.
Goosebumps spread across his skin and his breath caught. He prayed she didn’t lift her knee too quickly or this would get embarrassing quick. He caught her tracing fingers with is and brought them up to place a kiss on her knuckles.
“Sorry. Did that tickle?” she mumbled apologetically.
“A bit, but in a good way. I’m trying real hard to be a gentleman, Princessa.” He chuckled. He didn’t want to embarrass her, but he did want her to know he wanted her as well.
“Oh!” she giggled and hid her face in his chest again. “Sorry.”
He chuckled and pulled her across him until she was sitting on his abs looking down at him. “Don’t hide, Princessa. Nothing to be embarrassed about. I’m a big boy. I can admit I want you, but I can also assure you that I can wait.”
She laughed and braced her hands on the pillows above him as her hair fell down in a curtain around them. “You are possibly the sweetest man on the face of the earth.”
“Nah. You’re just used to little boys.” He slid his hands up and down her thighs gently. “You ready for today?” he asked seriously.
She nodded. “Yeah. You’re coming with me, right?”
“Of course, Princessa. And we’ve got a lunch date too. We can celebrate your freedom before the party tonight at the clubhouse. “He squeezed her waist gently before sitting up so that she was securely in his lap. “Guess you’ll be behind the bar all night, huh?”
“I’ll have breaks and EZ can always cover for me some.” She loosely wrapped her arms around Hank’s neck and grinned. “The downside to dating the bartender, I guess.”
His smile was blinding. She’d just laid claim to him for the first time. “No downside, Princessa. Just means I stick close to the bar until people get the message.”
“What message?”
“They can look, but only I can touch.” He gently dug his fingers into her sides, tickling her and making her squirm.
Her loud laughter drew Taza in to check on them. He stood in the doorway chuckling as Hank flipped them and attacked her with more tickles until she cried for mercy. They were both breathless from laughing and didn’t register Taza’s presence until he cleared his throat cockily. “Good morning, Chica. Coffee’s ready.”
She giggled and flopped onto the mussed bedding. “‘Kay. Morning Taza.” She smiled at him and Taza couldn’t help but love that look on her face.
Hank grinned and got up. “Alright, Old Man. I’m coming.” He dropped a quick kiss on Megan’s forehead and followed his vice-president out to the living room.
Taza laughed and tossed Hank’s duffle at him. “Go get cleaned up before breakfast. We gotta leave by 9:30.”
Hank chuckled and headed for the bathroom for a quick shower and change of clothes.
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