#i have a youtube playlist on rabbit videos from sincerely cinnabun

[the-abyss-gazes-into-you]

tue, aug 1st (day 2)

I finally did a successful workout today (only 20 minutes but it was more intense than the workouts I used to do before I got a trial on a workout app (The subscription is way too high so I'm just using it to try something new and collect new exercises)) and made oatmeal with honey and strawberries and some coffee because I was still feeling hot from the workout. I didn't use to drink coffee almost at all until this summer when I needed something to cool down so I tried to make something that was basically a spoonful of coffee with sugar mixed in a glass of milk, added ice and have been making a better (and iceless) version of that since even when it's colder. But I still prefer tea in the morning and can't wait for autumn.

Anyways. Spent most of the morning turning a thrifted shirt into a pillowcase while rewatching a whole season of The Good Place and then ate a whole pack of paprika-flavoured crisps instead of the pre-made pasta for lunch (they were delicious. and left some marks on the fabric.)

And because I was so excited about it and really wanted to finish it, I kind of strayed from my routine only the second day in, and arrived at the library almost two hours later than I was supposed to. Which is kind of a point I'd like to talk about for a little bit.

It took me literal years to find a balance between perfectionism and complete chaos. I kept putting everything into stupid school presentations just to make them tip-top, getting migraines from the stress and then had a long period in the past half-year when I was just letting myself do anything I wanted and eventually started having slight breakdowns when something wasn't going according to my expectations. It's rooted in deeper psychological issues that one has to work on, therapy is recommended, and you might need to sever ties with some toxic people in your life.

What I'm trying to say is, I still got a lot done today, I still arrived at the library and took more notes on rabbits. I used my time well, even though not perfectly according to the schedule.

There will come a time (maybe when you lose your daily schedule completely) when you realize that it's all made up and you need time off just as much as you need some time spent working and accomplishing something. You do need both. Burnout is hard to recover from. But if you play all day, every day and bend to your own every whim, you'll eventually start feeling like shit.

I'll be posting something about my own new (temporary) daily schedule soon, about putting it together and how I manage it in practice. For now, have some evening reading aesthetics and my new cosy pillow, and enjoy your day :)

#august 1st #daily update #productivity #work - rest balance #i have a youtube playlist on rabbit videos from sincerely cinnabun #it's 100 videos. #i'm only halfway through #(though a lot of them are just vlogs and stuff i don't have to take notes on and can just listen to while cooking or cleaning) #but it's a lot. and i still have more stuff on my to-do list. #also i've been thinking i could put together some thrifting tips if anyone's interested someday #or something short and sewing-focused because i'm definitely not turning this into a sewing blog #for the ones who wonder what is this guy doing talking to nobody in the notes #i'm not doing this for notes or getting famous being aesthetic #i'm doing this so i don't go insane #and become someone i'll like spending every day with #so bye and read a good book today y'all!