#i AM around on discord and stuff but i'm busy and burnt out so my responses are rlly sporadic | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

possiblytracker · 2 years

Text

important notice (commissions)

got hit very hard very recently with the realisation that i have been very irresponsible about some things this past... year! it has been around a year since i have consistently worked on my owed things. i have been feeling increasingly burnt out and guilty for a very very long time and need to actually address it like an adult since it's only fair. anyway if you've commissioned me in the past year or so and haven't heard anything since this post is for you

first off cutting straight to the point: this is basically me admitting defeat. i'm over halfway through a 3 year STEM degree that's currently sucking the life out of me and my ability to cope with the lengthy assignments I keep getting set has been steadily dropping. i have not been medicated for my ADHD properly for the past nearly two years due to circumstances outside of my control and I am failing or nearly failing 2, almost 3, out of six classes this year. on top of this, I have been drifting away pretty consistently from larger communities i used to be a part of- one of which i took a lot of commissions and trades from in 2021, then got a repetitive strain injury in my hand, dropped the ball, and never managed to pick it back up. this is in addition to comms taken from others outside of it in the meantime, either for semi-emergency reasons or just because

i can't stress enough that I do want to give people what is owed, i have never had the intention of sweeping it under the rug or just taking the goods and running, it's been at the back of my mind this entire time- but at the current time i do not think I am able to do serious art, it's eating me up inside that I can't, and i need to take accountability for it and recompense people somehow so i can stop stewing in guilt near-constantly

therefore I am more than happy to:

give back any designs that I never completed my side of the trade for, for you to resell or retrade or whatever you like, even if partial payment was made

refund you - my financial situation is tight right now but by late april I will have received a student finance payment that will allow me to give out refunds

financially compensate you even if you didn't pay me in money, e.g. design trades, within reason

keep you on the list of owed art anyway, and you will get your stuff eventually, but it may be a good while longer until I am situated and non-stressed enough to deliver - midsummer at the earliest

as above, but since it's been an entire year for some of this, if you want to change what you wanted me to draw (within the same price bracket ofc) because of shifting interests you can ask about that as well

reply to this post, message me here on tumblr, or on discord possiblytracker#0479, and we can work something out. I'm a little busy this week with end of term assignments but i promise i'll get back to you as soon as i am able to, i won't be ignoring anything. i'll look into setting up some sort of public and viewable record of what gets worked out from this for the sake of transparency as well. if anyone doesn't get in contact i'll automatically keep their art payment on the list anyway, i don't intend on dropping anything just bc this post got missed or something

in related news, I will be closing all public channels for commissioning me for artwork until further notice - probably until after I'm done with university as a whole in 2023. i may still take commissions from friends or mutuals on a case by case basis when my backlog is empty, so feel free to ask me about it in private, but I won't be formally opening anything at this time, as from experience I just can't handle it like I used to when i first started out and it's very irresponsible of me to keep taking up people's money and time without delivering. I'm barely drawing at all beyond silly sketches these days let alone churning out commissions-grade pieces I'm happy with, so I'm going to try and remove the stressor and the big source of guilt to focus on myself and hopefully some day soon make art enjoyable for me again. my ko-fi will remain open for donations but the commissions tab will be removed soon.

thanks for understanding. i really hope my actions in continually putting stuff aside this past year haven't left a sour taste in anybody's mouth, though I'd understand if they did. I sincerely apologise for this and hopefully i get to make up for it to as many people as possible

---

lastly, tagging some people i know i owe things to-

@thatsamolez @fayooweh @butterbeanchu @angeloshadows

I know there are some others but can't remember @s off the very top of my head, so if anyone else reading this does feel free to share this post around, i'd really appreciate it- same if i owe you stuff and forgot you. i'd be really grateful if as many people as possible got in touch. may reblog and tag more people later when i get back home to my notes

EDIT: i now have a record of what's being done here

#no this is NOT april fools i only realised the date after writing this gdhvjdf #yes i am Crawling in intense anxiety posting this but its either this or stay anxious forever. i will do my best #will be leaving this pinned for a little while until the majority of things get sorted out #this doesnt really apply to comms personally requested from close friends in the past month or 2 though its not like ive done those either;#though im still willing to compensate for those too if necessary just hmu #would like to extend a thank you to maple for the awke up call. ik it wasnt the purpose of your message but it made me think abt this #and to waka for poking me about this every so often i really did appreciate it and i'm sorry i never managed to properly follow through #god knows attempts were made and i shouldve done this several months ago #once it first became apparent it wasnt working #hope this is a good enough solution that people will be ok with

14 notes · View notes