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#hot crenny should i say
derivativealigner · 3 years
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Crenny (Craig x Kenny) Blush
Thank you for the prompt! I really needed a break from crenny angst so here’s just a good old-fashioned story where everyone has a good time. I hope you enjoy!
*
What would make Craig Tucker blush?
Kenny had a bad habit of accepting bets without a thought. It was easy money, accepting bets. Do something outrageous, get ten dollars. Who wouldn’t go for it? That could buy groceries! And the reward for causing Craig to be undone was too good to pass up. Thirty dollars for a simple blush.
“That’s kind of unfair,” Stan said after Cartman had laid the bet out. “You should pick someone else so it’s at least doable.”
They were gathered around a table in Kyle’s dorm room, ready to head out to a party. A party where, rumor has it, Craig would sulk in a corner because Clyde had dragged him there and Craig had presumably made a blood pact to always be a wingman.
“Thirty dollars.” Cartman laid three ten-dollar bills on the table, one after the other. “Thirty dollars if you make Craig blush before the party’s over. Come on, Kenny.” He flaunted a bill. “You know you want this. Thirty dollars, Kenny.”
“Stop that.” Kyle snatched the bill and returned it on the table beside the others. “Why are you so obsessed with playing matchmaker? Didn’t you learn anything from the time—”
“I’ll do it,” Kenny said. Obviously. He would’ve done it for five dollars, or for free since it was Craig—not because he had any special feelings for the guy, but just because a blush on that stone-cold face would be a sight to behold. “Throw in twenty more and I’ll blow him under a table.”
“Don’t,” Kyle said when Cartman looked like he just might.
“Yeah,” Stan said. “You can’t play with people’s feelings like that.”
So the bet remained simple: for thirty dollars, make Craig Tucker blush before the end of the night. It was for the best. The added incentive of twenty dollars would’ve had Kenny on his knees, which would force some serious introspection about his sexuality that he’d be happier contemplating outside the realm of a bet. For now, he considered himself a thrill-sexual whose life’s mission was to get a rise out of Craig. For thirty dollars. Only because of the thirty dollars.
And because it’d be a treat to see Craig Tucker reduced to a blushing mess, but really it was for the thirty dollars. The blowjob remained optional.
+
The frat house looked surprisingly nice for a frat house in Boulder, Colorado. A couple drunk girls giggled beside the steps leading to the house, ducked out of view behind a vine-covered lattice. They yelled out giggled greetings as Kenny opened the door to the party, but he was on a mission and no amount of giggling could distract him.
“Where’s Craig?” Cartman asked as soon as the door closed behind them, so Kenny wasn’t the only one invested in this bet.
It would be hard to spot Craig even in a well-lit room full of respectful partygoers, but in a crowd of drunken bastards and flashing lights of too many colors in the otherwise dark room, it was tricky to find a man who didn’t want to be found.
“There.” Stan pointed at a white couch in a moderately secluded area behind a horde of people. “He looks bored.”
“No shit,” Kenny said. Craig had a serious case of RBF, or Resting Bored Face, alongside an even more deadly affliction of being effortlessly handsome. Really it was the perfect combination for the blush of a lifetime; a little pink on those perfectly sculpted cheeks would make anyone’s knees weak.
“Go, Kenny!” Cartman gave a push that only made Kenny stumble. “Thirty dollars, Kenny. Thirty dollars!”
“Shut up. I’m strategizing.”
What could make Tucker blush? He didn’t seem like the type to blush at nudity, so pantsing him was out of the question. Anything quick was unlikely to work against such a calm and restrained person. No, this was an endurance sport. So heavy flirting with a side of groping? Respectfully, of course. No hand on dick allowed.
Yeah, that’d do the trick.
“Okay,” Kenny said. “Keep those dollars ready for me.”
Craig sat on the couch, deliciously detached from the party around him. Surely he wouldn't mind company. Kenny headed through the crowd of people and sidled beside his expressionless target.
“Hi, Craig,” Kenny said with a smile because if someone came up to him with a smile and his name on their lips, he’d already be on the fast track to a red face.
Craig, however, barely turned his head. “Hey.”
Clearly this would not be a straight road to victory. What kind of flirting produced the most blushing, anyway? For Kenny, a compliment would get the job done, so that was his next angle.
“Have I ever told you,” he started with the sultriest voice he could summon, “that you're ridiculously handsome?”
Nothing. No blush or even a vaguely bashful blink. Craig barely even acknowledged Kenny. If the roles had been reversed, at least Kenny would have the common decency to become a blushing mess.
“You haven't,” Craig said.
“Well, you are.” Kenny moved closer. He would get a reaction, no matter what. He nudged Craig’s chin. “Look at me for a second. Just real quick.”
Craig looked. “Why?”
“Because I, uh.” In this closeness, staying focused was not easy. “Just. Your eyes. Nice color.”
“Okay. Thanks.”
“And, and!” Kenny booped Craig's nose. “I've never seen anyone with such a powerful nasal… part. Like the bridge. And it's so well-placed, right in the middle.”
He might have been grasping at straws. He was warm and tense and his heart wouldn’t calm down.
“Did you do shrooms?” Craig asked.
“No. I'm just admiring your gorgeousness.” Kenny shimmied closer, smushing their legs together. “If I were gay, I'd let you do whatever you want to me.”
Craig didn't move away. Not that he had any space to move to, but it still stirred something in Kenny's stomach—knowing Craig could’ve gotten up if he didn't find the advances flattering, and yet he stayed right there.
“If you were gay?” Craig asked.
“Yeah.” Kenny dared a hand on Craig's knee. “I'd lay down and let you do me.”
“That makes you a little gay.”
Kenny faltered. “Yeah, well, everyone's a little gay. I'm just saying you could—”
“No, that makes you a little gay. Unless you're only saying it because that fat fuck who's watching us dared you to do this.”
Kenny glanced over at Cartman, who was not being subtle about his giddy voyeurism.
“No, he just, uh.” An unfortunate warmth spread around Kenny’s cheeks, and the only excuse he could think of would only make it worse. “He knows I have a crush on you. That's why he's watching.”
“Oh,” Craig said. No blush, not even in the face of a love confession.
But the difficulty only made it more of a thrill. This was the time to commit, and commit hard.
Kenny rubbed Craig's knee. “Yeah. I have a huge crush on you. Because you don't take any bullshit and I find it really hot.” It wasn't exactly a lie, and Kenny didn't have time to untangle why it was so easy to say these things to Craig.
“And that's why you're touching me?”
Kenny's hand ventured toward the inner thigh. “Am I being too forward?”
Craig put his hand over Kenny's and leaned closer. “No. Go as far as you want to.”
Kenny could barely breathe with that gorgeous face so close to his. “You’re into this?”
“I am. You're kind of handsome yourself.”
Now Kenny's face was properly burning. “Really?”
“Sure, why not.” Craig moved their hands to Kenny's leg instead, to a danger zone that immediately made Kenny's blood rush. “I could take you out someday. Just us, a couple drinks or a movie.”
A movie and perhaps a blowjob in the parking lot. Knees on gravel, hands in hair, a messy scene of desperate—
Kenny blinked. "Wait, are you fucking with me?”
“Are you fucking with me?” Craig took his hand away and left a need in Kenny's body. “Because that'd be messed up.”
“I'm not,” Kenny said, and somehow it was true. “We can go on a date if you want.”
For only a moment, Craig seemed uncertain. “You’re committed to this act, aren’t you?”
Maybe a bit of making out would leave Craig red in the face. Kenny leaned closer. “What if we kiss? Would you believe me then?”
“Only if you're convincing.”
That sounded like permission. Or another dare.
Some might say Kenny was at the whim of his impulses, and when Kenny found himself climbing into Craig's lap and wrapping his arms around his neck, he started to think it might be true.
“I won't get up,” Kenny said, “until your face is bright red.”
Craig's hands landed on Kenny's ass. “Good luck.”
Kenny's heart hammered as he leaned in and he didn't have the restraint to pretend he could take this at any pace. The second their lips touched, Kenny melted into the kiss and pulled Craig closer by the collar. For years, Craig had been a distant fantasy, a gorgeous face teasing Kenny’s dreams, too good to be true. Kenny started moving his hips, rocking into the kiss, then decided he was still only doing it because of the dare. This was only to make Craig blush. And writhe. And put his cock in Kenny's mouth later.
“Ah, fuck,” Kenny moaned into Craig's lips. “Craig.”
If they hadn't been in the middle of possibly watching eyes, this would've been the moment it got serious. A clothes off, cocks out, messily making out kind of serious.
Craig pushed Kenny only enough to force them to part. “You’re not pretending?”
Kenny was about to dive in again, but—
A blush! The tiniest smudge of pink had spread on Craig's face, which made him look so fuckable that ‘a little gay’ was dangerously close to becoming ‘very fucking gay’.
“I guess not.” Kenny brushed his thumb against the pink cheek and admired his handiwork. “You're gorgeous, Tucker. How was I supposed to resist?”
The blush deepened. “So we're really going on a date?”
A date with Craig Tucker? Holding hands and kissing and just being together until sunrise, lips sore from exploring. Kenny’s heart rate climbed at the mere fantasy.
“Yes, please.” He punctuated his words with a quick kiss, and he stayed close as he whispered, “I need to get you alone.”
“Okay,” Craig said, a bit breathless, and it took all of Kenny's willpower not to spend the rest of the party trying to reduce Craig into a blushing mess.
+
Later, Kenny met Cartman on the outskirts of the party.
“I'm going on a date with Craig Tucker,” Kenny said with a smile that just wouldn’t go away. Then he held out a hand, palm up. “And he blushed, so pay up.”
After he had paid for popcorn with Cartman's money, he kissed Craig in the dark theater. Not because of a bet, not for a dare, not for anything other than the need to feel those lips against his again. And later, in the cozy darkness of Craig’s bedroom, he got the blushing mess he had fantasized about long before the bet.
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4awny · 3 years
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Crenny fluff from Chapter 19
Craig stood up from the bed when he heard the door open.
"Sorry, prolly shoulda' knocked, but I-" Kenny stopped in mid-sentence when he saw Craig standing before him in a fitted t-shirt and shorts. "-thought you'd be expecting me." He finished slowly, using his foot to kick the door behind him. There wasn't anything about the raven that should have stood out, but when Kenny took sight of his lean thighs, there was something about him that just made him stare in absolute awe.
"Hey." Craig greeted, rubbing the back of his neck. "Sorry for the mess."
Kenny looked around his surroundings. What mess? He thought when he saw absolutely nothing out of place. He watched as Craig picked up the empty can of Pepsi from the nightstand and throw it into the trash can. "Oh, that mess." He answered out loud and gave a chuckle. "That's your idea of mess?"
"I didn't have time to clean up. I thought you were gonna give me a heads up."
"You should see my room." Kenny muttered and then threw a thumb behind him. "Anyway, guess what? I just walked all the way from Kyle's. We counted the money. This is your half." He pulled the rucksack from his shoulder and extended his arm out.
Craig eyed the bag suspiciously, a little surprised that his friend had just carried a bunch of money on his own, in the cold. "You didn't have to walk all the way here, I would have just picked it up at a more convenient time."
Kenny had his own good reasoning. "You told me to come by. Plus, I feel bad for hitting you." He nodded to the small red mark on Craig's cheek.
"Don't worry about it." Craig shook his head like it was nothing and took the bag from Kenny's grasp. He didn't bother unzipping it to check. Instead, he dumped it to the floor and turned to his nightstand to pull out a folded piece of paper.
"Happy Birthday."
Kenny accepted the folded paper and as he opened it, his eyes lit up. It was a rough pencil drawing of Deadpool with a middle finger in the air and written in comic book font were the words, Happy 18th Birthday, McCormick. He couldn't stop the huge grin from splitting his face and he loved every detail of it, including the creases from where it had been folded multiple times.
"Wow, thank you so much, man. You really didn't have to do this." This feeling of surprise didn't falter and he pulled his eyes away from the gifted artwork to lock them onto Craig's. As if his body moved on its own, he stepped forward and on his tippy toes, he wrapped an arm around the taller male's neck, pulling him into a warm embrace.
The unusual contact came as a bit of a shock to Craig, but as he felt a second arm wrap around the other side of his neck, he found his arms snaking their way around Kenny's waist, pulling him in close.
It was usual behaviour for Kenny to give hugs, but it was not usual behaviour for it to last as long as it did. The way Craig's arm hugged tightly around his body, combined with how their torsos rested so intimately against each other, was a feeling neither of them could have ever comprehended from each other.
When Kenny pulled back, one of his hands fell to comfort against Craig's chest, with the other remaining where it was behind his neck. When Craig saw blue eyes flickering to his parted lips, he froze. He felt this nervous feeling in his chest and he wasn't sure how to recover from it. Their lips were that close to each other, Craig could feel the warm breath emitting from the blond's parted mouth. It looked as though he was waiting for something.
Is he waiting... for me? Craig wondered as he watched Kenny's eyelids lower into a mysterious, hooded gaze. His blue eyes not once leaving his lips. Craig felt this fixation, this temptation, this adoration... All of these sudden feelings swarmed his mind and it was almost like something else was taking over his entire consciousness. He had the sudden urge to pull his arms away and shove Kenny with force. The blond stumbled back, hitting the wall firmly behind him. Stunned by the abrupt push, Kenny's expression turned to panic, assuming he crossed the mark.
But as Craig stepped forward, the blond learnt that this new look in his friend's eyes was not anger. It was indeed, lust.
Kenny's eyes softened when he felt a set of fast hands cup around the sides of jaw, thumbs clenching at his cheeks. He allowed his back to push into the wall behind him and his mind fuzzled into a moment of sheer joy when Craig pressed his lips onto his.
It was a bold move to make for him, but it was leaf he had subconsciously taken from the Book of Kenny, because just for a split second, he felt himself living for the moment.
It felt right.
Kenny's idle arms found a way to move on their own and his fingers wrapped loosely around Craig's wrists. The blond always took pride in knowing how to take control in a relationship, but with Craig, he found himself lost in what to do with himself. It was easy with a woman, because the general consensus was for the male to be domineering and he had no problem with doing that. But it was Craig that appeared to be the dominating and although Kenny was totally down for it, it felt completely new to him.
Craig pulled back to see the blond's eyes flicker open. Their eyes connected for a brief second, before he leaned back in and kissed him again. One of his hands dropped to wrap around the side of his neck and the other hand slipped down to the blond's slender hip, pulling him in close enough for their lower abdomens to bump together.
"Mm, wait~" Kenny murmured into his mouth, but neither of them pulled away. "Craig, hang- hang on just a second."
Mumbling against his lips, Craig grew a little impatient. "What is it?"
"No, nothing. Ah, it's just~" A rough sound of arousal left Kenny's lips and a hand pushed at Craig's chest. "I need to tell you-"
"Spit it out, McCormick." He released the fingers that were clamped onto the blond's waist and dipped them under his flimsy jacket. When his fingers touched the small of Kenny's back, he flinched at how icy the skin was. "Fuck, what's wrong with you, why're you so cold?"
Kenny felt a sense of loss when the hands on his body abandoned their positions. "Hey, you try walking two and a half miles in the blistering winds and see how far it gets you."
"Take this off." Craig pulled on the zip of the blond's second hand jacket and backed away to the wardrobe. He shuffled through the neatly aligned and color coordinated items of clothing and stopped when he came across one of his favourite hoodies. He had to stop wearing it throughout senior year, because it was getting too small for him. Glancing over at his friend's small frame, he figured he may have found its new owner.
Kenny had already shrugged his jacket off and hung it up on the door handle by the time Craig came over with the new item of clothing. "Hm." He hummed in amusement when he saw the small NASA logo on the top left hand side. "I remember seeing you wearing that thing all the time last year."
"I miss wearing it." Craig confessed as the sweater was taken from his grasp. "It'll keep you warm, but you should really buy a coat or something. I don't wanna hear none of that I have no money bullshit, either. I don't care if you're saving it up, you've got more than enough to spend fifty bucks on a decent coat."
The blond slipped the hoodie over his head and straightened out the hem. "Yes, sir." He mocked playfully, shifting around in front of the mirror to check out his new outfit. He slicked his blond strands back and when he was satisfied with his look, he turned to face the man standing behind him. "What do you think?" He asked, extending out his arms.
Craig tilted his head to the side to study his look, but it was more of an excuse to admire his physique. Sure, he was a little malnourished, but it would only take a couple of decent meals to fill him out. But even so, he believed Kenny still looked perfect. He was clumsy, a little rough around the edges and filled with complete optimism, even on the worst of days. There was not one bad bone in the blond's body and Craig thought it was incredibly admirable.
Kenny was a good guy and only now, was he really starting to notice it.
"Looks better on you than it ever did on me." Craig admitted as he folded his arms.
"Well, you're not wrong." The blond agreed with a cheeky smile, before stepping forward. "Dayum. You weren't lying when you said it'll keep me warm, huh?" He fanned a hand in front of his neutral tempered face to pretend to cool down. "Whew, it sure is warm in here. What is that you got on, central heating or something?"
Craig rolled his eyes, but couldn't stop the smirk forming on his lips as he played into Kenny's little game. "If you're that hot, maybe you should take your sweater off."
"What? Oh, this thing?" The blond pulled at the collar. "Ah, what a great idea. I never even thought of that."
Just before he could grab at the hem, Craig's fingers got there first. "Here, let me help you."
Kenny lifted his arms in the air and when his head poked through the hole, their eyes immediately locked on to each other and the gray garment was discarded to the floor next to two pairs of socked feet. Having a floor littered with worn clothing, was always a pet peeve of Craig's. However, that thought didn't even cross his mind and if anything, it looked better on his bedroom floor anyway.
"You were saying?" Craig spoke, the comforting sound of his voice reeling the blond in with each word. "Just now, you were about to tell me something."
"I was?" Balancing on the balls of his feet and leaning in, Kenny's fixation on trying to search for whatever it was in those fair eyes had clouded his mind and he had to wait for Craig's words to catch up on him. He then remembered what he wanted to say. "Oh, I was."
"Tell me."
It wasn't that he didn't want to tell him, he just lost the nerve. Could he really just go ahead and unmask his online persona to Craig right here and now? I have to, right? No, wait. I can't. Not now. Bad time. Later. Promise. He concluded in the shortest argument in the world.
"Craig-" He whispered out, eyes darting between the left and right eye. It felt like he had been waiting for this day for an agonizingly long time. He never believed that this moment was ever going to be possible outside of his lasting daydreams and extensive fantasies. "Do you know how long I've been waiting for this?"
A twitch of confusion from the crease of his brow was a sign that Craig had been completely oblivious to these growing feelings Kenny had for him. Had it really been that long? How long was that long anyway? The thought of Kenny crushing over him while he was none the wiser was a little overwhelming. All of those times the blond would flirt with him and he would brush it off, thinking he was being mocked or played with and this whole time... it was a sign?
Have I really missed all of the signs? The thought passed through his mind as well as the memories of all of his past interactions with Kenny. It was surprising at how many memories came forth in a matter of seconds, but he didn't have the time to organize them and decipher each one, because that was going to take a couple of sleepless nights, at the very least.
"No, I really have no idea." He admitted and a small part of Kenny felt disappointed for not advancing on their friendship sooner. But then again, Craig was a confusing guy and had rejected almost every move Kenny tried to make on him, so maybe it was all to do with the right timing.
Kenny dropped his attention to the floor as his lips cracked into a bashful smile. "Nah, I didn't think you did."
Of course, Craig was insanely curious by this and was determined to know exactly how long Kenny had felt this way, but they had all the time in the world to talk about it and as of right now, he had other things on his mind.
"Alright, enough with the confessions." The taller male declared and smoothed a hand down Kenny's arm, before yanking him in close by the forearm.
Stumbling into an unexpected kiss, a soft sound of surprise escaping the blond's throat. He felt a second hand reach the side of his neck, the same way it did before and he leaned into the touch, like a purring cat.
With his body now warmed up, not only from the luxurious privilege of having quality central heating, but also from heat of Craig's hands, Kenny started to find his confidence again. He withdrew from the kiss only to grab at Craig's collar with both hands and pull his head down to his level to meet his lips. He took the parting of Craig's lips as an invitation and their tongues met in the middle. Light licking turned more ferocious with each breath they shared, silencing their thoughts and submitting to the intense arousal.
Having escaped the fierce cold from the piercing winds outside, Kenny was now facing a desperate escape from the radiating heat burning beneath his skin. He lightly pushed Craig to move back, but as the raven was too invested in his own lustful thoughts, he took the gesture as a form of rough play and gripped the hand he had on the side of Kenny's neck harder with a few of his fingernails digging into the back roots of blond hair.
"Argh." A pained hiss of pleasure escaped Kenny's lips and he could have sworn the guy had just glued razor blades to his fingers, because there was just no way anyone could have a grip that sharp.
Do that again. The words were about to slip from his mouth, but it seemed as though God was finally there to grant him his wish.
Craig's hand abandoned the neck completely after hearing that erotic sound leave Kenny's lips and snaked it into the growing length of blond hair. Still needs a haircut. He argued and made a valid point by tugging a fistful of hair back. Kenny couldn't read his thoughts, but he could feel the firm grip on the back of his head and it made him smirk with pleasure.
"I didn't think you'd be so... rough." Kenny admitted when he pulled away. He felt the firm hold on his head release and the tension was replaced with soft, inquisitive fingers.
"Your hair is soft." Craig noted as a second hand pushed back the falling strands from Kenny's forehead. "Would look better if it was short."
Kenny's attention bounced between the two eyes that were inspecting his mess of blond hair. The features on Craig's face were captivating him in every way possible. From the piercing gray eyes, to the sharp jawline, to the small horizontal scar sitting above his left eyebrow. It was barely noticeable and if he was any further away, he wouldn't have noticed it.
In the midst of wondering what kind of badass hustle Craig could have possibly gotten himself into to receive such a battle scar, he also took the comments about his hair into consideration. Kenny wasn't sentimental when it came to hairstyles and even if Craig preferred it fully shaved, he would have done just that. So with a sudden spark flashing through his mind of ideas, he came to a decision.
"Craig, can I ask- if you don't like something, what do you usually do about it?"
Still playing with Kenny's hair, he took a moment to think about it. "Give me an example, I need context."
"So like. Okay, let's say, you really wanted to go and see a local band. All your buddies are going, everyone's gonna be there, there's gonna be booze, drugs, sex. Y'know, the usual shit, right?"
"Right." Craig hesitated, wondering where the blond was about to take this.
"So one night, your ma's there. She's getting all menstrual with you, telling you, you can't go. You're all like, why the fuck not? My name's Craig Tucker, not Cuck Tucker, you get what I'm saying?" The gap Kenny left was meant for Craig to agree, but Craig didn't agree. He just halted his hand movements and watched his friend tell the story in silence. "So anyway, she starts yelling. Your dad comes home after a fourteen hour shift, he starts yelling. Your sister comes down the stairs, annoyed that her Disney Plus subscription has expired, so now she's yelling. Stripe leaves his bed for the first time that day to find no food in his bowl and guess what? He's now yelling too. Everyone's mad at each other and poor Craig is stuck in the middle. So you're all like, man! Fuck this shit, if I wanna go to a stupid party, I'm gonna go to a stupid party! Your dad turns to you and says if you leave this house, don't bother coming back! So. What do you do?"
Taking in the question, which felt more like another one of Kenny's monologues, Craig tried to express an answer in the best way he could. "Um. Well, first of all, I don't understand what relevance any of that had to do with each other. Why is Stripe getting involved?"
"Because you forgot to feed him, so he's mad?" Kenny's eyes narrowed and his eyebrows drew together, the answer being seemingly obvious to him. "I don't get how you're confused, I'd be mad too if my owner forgot to-" He quickly closed his mouth before letting the irony of what he was about to say leave his lips. "Look. This ain't about me right now. This is about you."
"You focus too much on little details." Craig noted, but it was not to criticize. He enjoyed listening to the minor details Kenny would come up with, even for the sake of a stupid story. It blossomed his creative mind, something Craig could express visually through pen and paper, but not verbally. To create color with words, he thought it was an admirable quality to have.
"Will you just answer the darn question?"
"I don't even know what the question was. Are you asking me to choose between staying home to avoid being... grounded? And miss out on the fun, or go to the party or band or whatever it was and just deal with the consequences afterwards?"
"Yeah." Kenny confirmed with a nod.
"It wouldn't matter if this is a realistic question or a hypothetical one, because you should already know the answer to this pointless question."
"There is a point to this, I swear." The blond assured.
"Okay." Craig sighed and decided to just play along. "Anyone that tells me I can't do something, I tell them to go fuck themselves and go ahead and do it anyway."
The attitude behind the words was amusing enough as it was and it was not an exaggeration. He was a man of his word.
"Interesting." Kenny mused, slipping away from the grasp and backing to the door behind him. "You know what? You, Craig Tucker, can not cut my hair. I will not allow it. There will be consequences if you decide to cut my hair." When Craig did nothing but blink at him, Kenny elaborated further. "Craig. I am refusing to let you cut my hair. Re-fu-sing. I do not consent, for reasons unknown. Get what I'm saying?"
It didn't take much longer for Craig to catch on to the silly game Kenny was playing. He couldn't understand why someone would waste so much breath for a simple question. It did not make sense to him and he should have known better, because he knew more than anyone that Kenny was a talker.
"You want me to give you a haircut?"
The grin on the blond's face dropped in an instant and he scratched a spot at the back of his head. "Yeah, we'll go with that."
Craig's lips broke into a soft smile as he sighed. "You talk too much. Would've been easier if you just asked."
"Yeah, I don't know if you're aware of this, but people usually, you know... play along?" He gestured his hands in a circular motion. "That's kinda how it works. Cartman's the worst for it, sometimes you can't tell if he's joking or being deadly serious."
"Doesn't that show you how different our friendship groups are?"
"Yeah and yours is yawn, boring. I got Kyle and Eric fighting all the time and do you know what that means for me?" He didn't even get time to respond before Kenny answered. "Front row seats, baby."
Craig rolled his eyes and found himself grateful for not having to put up with that much drama within his own squad. But then again, Clyde had already been a handful over the last few months, so maybe they were even with the drama. "Speaking of which, I presume you heard about what happened between Clyde and Cartman the other day?"
Kenny tilted his head, like a curious pup that had just learnt the command word for treat. "Something happened?"
Craig picked up the pair of scissors from the stationary cup that was on his desk and nodded his head to the door. "Come on, I'll tell you about it when I chop this goddamn mop from your head."
.Despite the negative opinions he had on Kenny's hairstyle, it would have been ironic to say that it actually started to grow on him.
The Chat Room Scandal - Chapter 19
Feel free to read the entire fic on AO3!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/31878976/chapters/82834027
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blame-canada · 7 years
Text
Drive Safe
Prompt: Festival
Word Count: 2,175 (sorry it’s so long!)
Pairing: Crenny
Rated: T
Welcome to the last installment of the miniseries I put together for the South Park Drabble Bomb! I’m probably gonna go back and edit this fic later, since I’ve actually put more work into it than I expected. We’ll see! You can read the whole story from the start on AO3 here, and this chapter of it here. Enjoy!
Coming here had been a mistake. Craig knew it, had known since they stepped out of the car and into the nearly full parking lot ten blocks away. Had known it since he got a sinking feeling in his gut with no apparent explanation. Now he knew it was an omen. It was a warning he hadn’t heeded. Craig was not a superstitious person, but he should have taken that flip of his stomach at the sight of the crowd seriously. Now he was stuck here, in this moment, only vaguely aware of Kenny to his side, and all too aware of the girl in front of him with her strawberry blonde hair in a ponytail high on her head, tied with rainbow ribbons. The last time Craig saw her, it was in low pigtails that bounced on her shoulders.
“I, uh,” she stuttered, her voice weak, and Craig’s chest constricted because minutes ago she’d been proudly spewing the rhetoric of her cause to passersby. All her confidence had left her at first sight, in a plume of invisible energy that spilled from her like the blood drained from her face, and her hands dropped to her sides, threatening to lose the fliers clenched in her fists. The papers were trembling in her grip, and she looked dangerously close to falling into tears right then, before he’d even spoken. “...Craig?” she whispered, and it was a wonder he’d heard her at all over the volume of the crowd around them. He’d forgotten them though, forgotten everything, and all he could remember was the way she’d wished him goodnight the evening before he left her behind, in all its unremarkable glory.
“Hi, Ruby,” he settled for, after thinking of nothing better to say, and her tears spilled over immediately upon hearing the softness in his voice. She put her fliers down on the table behind her so that she could cover her mouth, a sob cracking Craig’s ribs as it rattled from her chest. The other people at her booth looked to her in surprise, but she shook her head at them, and she motioned for him to follow her behind the tent. He was startled by the feeling of Kenny’s hand brushing his and clasping it, and he squeezed it back so tightly he felt his bones creak.
As soon as they were relatively out of sight, she shoved him in the chest. “The fuck-”
“Why.” She didn’t say it like a question, more like a demand, and he imagined her tears to be so hot from the anger in her eyes they might evaporate.
“I don’t-”
“Don’t you dare,” she seethed, “say ‘I don’t know.’” He wasn’t sure if Kenny was intentionally backing off, but he wished he’d come and save him, just this once. It was his fault they were even there. The least he could do is take the hit, give him an escape route, something.
“Ruby, look, I-”
“No, you look!” she cried, shrilly, and Craig determined that she didn’t really want him to answer her at all. “I just-” her voice cracked and her shoulders slumped, the defeat in her eyes so painful he wished for just a moment he could go back in time and warn her of the flash decision he was about to make. “I hate you, you know.”
Craig swallowed, the motion so mechanical and awkward he nearly choked. The thickness in his throat, conjured by the unbridled emotion in his sister’s eyes, wouldn’t go away. “I deserve that,” he said slowly.
“Fucking yes you deserve that!” she said, and she ran her hands down her face and closed her eyes while she took several calming breaths. He took the chance to glance at Kenny, who was looking on with something somber in his expression. At the same time, he was encouraging, the twitch in his lip a sign in tension but the urgency in his eyes a silent demand to do something. God, how he wished they could have run into Karen. Karen would have welcomed Kenny back with open arms. Then again, he hadn’t seen her in five years, and she could have grown up into an entirely different woman since then.
“Where did you go?” she asked, and oh, the list was so long.
“The beach,” he said, to start from the beginning. The frustration in her growl reminded him so much of growing up that he wasn’t sure if he wanted to laugh or to cry. He desperately did not want to cry.
“And you took him with you?” Ruby said, pointing at Kenny, and it occurred to Craig for the first time that there was no way that she or any of his family would have known that he’d run with somebody. Their first clue would have been the commotion in Kenny’s front yard, long after he’d already gone.
“Ruby, I-”
“Karen never really got over you,” she spat, and Kenny’s attention snapped to her so fast he nearly heard his neck crack. “You know you broke her heart, right?”
Kenny faltered. He wasn’t supposed to falter. “Hey, back off,” Craig snarled, because Kenny didn’t need to get dragged into whatever this tense joke of a sibling reunion was supposed to be.
Ruby did, and she was quiet for a moment while her tears slowed, her occasional sniffles and wiping her hand across her cheeks the only interruption in the tiny bubble that surrounded the three of them. He’d been complaining about the crowds, but now Craig would kill to be lost in one, riding a wave of anonymity.
“Hold on, here,” Ruby heaved through a shaky sigh, and she picked up a flier from her booth to shove into Craig’s hands. He accepted it and skimmed as she spoke. “This is what I’ve been doing. This is- Craig, this is why I thought you left. Why we all thought you left.”
In his hands was an infographic on homeless LGBT youth.
“You thought I ran because I was gay?” he wanted to laugh, the idea so preposterous, but it was better than the actual one. He was tempted to lie, to say that he’d left tragically, fearing the backlash of homosexuality in a small homophobic town. He hadn’t, though. He’d just felt stifled, and stupid, and driven so dramatically on the impulse to protect Kenny that leaving seemed like the best option. Maybe it had been, for Kenny, but he could have lived out the rest of his teenage years bored and normal, back in his bedroom, where he wondered if his bed and posters remained. If he hadn’t fallen so foolishly in love, maybe his desire to grab him by the hand and rescue him from his home life wouldn’t have led him to this moment. Maybe it wouldn’t have been the last straw that put his old car in drive and pointed the compass toward the Pacific.
“We didn’t have much to go on,” Ruby mumbled, and she looked so confused and sad that Craig felt overwhelmed with the want to hug her, and so he did. He took two large steps forward to wrap his arms around her shoulders, and while she initially put her hands on his chest to push him away, she started to cry again, and her hands clung desperately to the back of his t-shirt while she wetted the front. “Why,” she repeated, “what the hell is wrong with you?”
“I don’t know,” Craig said, and then, “I’m sorry.”
He hadn’t realized how sorry he was until he said the words. He hugged her tighter, whispered them over and over into her ponytail while she shook and scolded him through messy tears. “Mom has all your old art projects all over the house,” she hiccuped. “I hate them. I hate all of them.”
“Yeah, I probably do too,” Craig muttered, and Ruby laughed weakly, but it was such a relief to have heard at all that he laughed too. She pulled back first, looking over Craig’s shoulder, and he turned around to find Kenny leaning back against a pole of the tent, staring down into his phone. He felt a little guilty, but Ruby reached around him to snag him by the sleeve, and with a yelp, she dragged him into a hug too.
“You’ve been together all this time, right?” she sniffled, and Kenny smiled warmly, nodding. Pride shot through him. “Then you’re part of this fucked up family reunion too. Karen’s not gonna believe this, oh God.” Craig watched Kenny stiffen. He put his arms around both of them to release the tension.
After a brief explanation to the supervisors of the booth, Ruby got herself off the hook, and they went to the greasiest, cheapest diner they could find that wasn’t littered with rainbows. Catching up was awkward at first, but eventually, their conversation began to break down into the way it once was, full of insults and aggression that was anything but serious. He watched her hands as she spoke, noting their inelegant waving and the way she’d painted her nails in rainbow colors, and for the second time, Craig thought he might cry. He felt like he’d never loved her so much as he did now.
“So regardless of what you say, I’m telling Karen,” Ruby scolded, and Kenny nodded wordlessly, knowing full well he would lose in a battle with her. He hadn’t thought he’d want to see his family ever again, for the shame that he felt for running, but with his sister sitting across from him, holding his hand on the table while Kenny held his other in his lap, it was painfully obvious how much he’d actually wanted to. If he hadn’t run into her, though, he doubted he would have gotten the chance.
They missed the entire parade holed up in that little diner on the outskirts of Denver. She was going to community college for two years, then transferring to a private school to finish out a vet tech degree. He felt so proud, but still so ashamed, and she placed her other hand on top of their already clasped ones to still his subtle shaking. He’d told himself for years he didn’t want this, but how wrong he had been. How horribly wrong he’d been to think he really wanted to leave her, leave all of them behind forever.
She gave him her phone number and his parents’ apparently new address, when they had to leave. They’d moved to Aurora. “You don’t have to text me,” she said, her smile raw and hard to look at, “you don’t have to. I just want you to have it. In case you want it later. I love you.” At the confession, she began to cry again, and he hugged her all over again.
“You never did anything wrong,” he whispered, squeezing her tighter, “I was an idiot. I’m sorry.” He leaned in closer to her ear, to try to guard Kenny from hearing him, when he said, “Give Karen his number for me. Please.” When they pulled apart, she nodded. She gave Kenny a hug too, which he happily returned, and he ruffled up her hair, much to her protest. Going their separate ways at the dismantled festival grounds felt like leaving all over again, and Kenny had to practically hold him up while he walked away. He could tell Kenny was missing his sister again, the pain renewed by Craig’s own reunion. He hoped Ruby would obey his wishes.
When they got to the car, he typed her number into a new contact. He wrote Drive safe, and it felt so mundane and yet so heavy and meaningful that he couldn’t help the couple of sniffles that betrayed him and his want not to cry. God, he didn’t want to cry, but he did so anyway, and Kenny held his hand on his back in comfort as he leaned over his steering wheel. He tried hard not to let out the ugly gasping breaths he was prone to, because he’d never learned how to properly cry. It was always a mess. Kenny leaned on his side and wrapped both arms around him sideways. He coughed away the lump in his throat and wiped his face on his sleeve. Neither of them said a word.
Halfway through the drive home, Kenny’s phone lit up. Craig watched him lazily unlock it in his peripheral view. He stared at his screen, silent for several seconds where even the music had paused between tracks. “Craig,” he murmured, the tone of his voice strained and serious and intense, and Craig reached across the center console to place his hand on his thigh, to say ‘I know.’
He didn’t take his eyes off his constantly reigniting phone screen for the rest of the drive. Craig knew then, inherently, more than any moment since hopping in his car that Saturday morning five years ago, that everything would be okay. That they were okay.
Okay was all they ever needed.
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sibatrash · 7 years
Note
Request: Crenny, first date. (South Park) Btw, congratulations!
Man, ya’ll really wanted me to jump back on the South park fandom train didn’t you? This was the first request and I’m more than happy to oblige!
‘This is stupid as fuck’
Every step further was another chorus of insults ringing in his mind, bouncing off of the walls of his brain and rattling in his skull until he could feel them drilling into bone, engraving their terrible messages into his very flesh.
‘You should just go home’
Usually, walking to the movie theatre wasn’t like this. On most days that he decided to break into the movies by sneaking into the back and stealing some popcorn when the attendants weren’t looking, Craig was calm. He’d done this a fuck ton of times over the years to keep himself out of getting into even more trouble. His greeting to the man working the front ticket counter, was the middle finger. Followed by a gruff and rather begrudging admittance that for once, he was going to pay for his damn ticket to see the new Conjuring. It was always this motherfucker, pimples dotting his cheeks and curly red hair everywhere, who usually caught Craig around his third or fourth movie for the day and threatened to call the cops unless Craig stole him some soda or a hot dog or some shit like that. He always wondered why the hell the guy didn’t just take it, working there and all. But apparently the boss was a hardass about that kind of shit and Craig was the only one capable of taking a measly hot dog every now and again. That bastard looked even more smug than he normally did while handing Craig his ticket, also with the receipt to show he actually spent money on something this fucking dumb rather than break in like he normally did. Fuck that kid, next time he wanted a damn hot dog Craig would just let him suffer and starve. Although the kids’ immediate reward to being such a smug bastard about Craig paying five dollars to see a stupid fucking horror movie, was the middle finger and the slamming of the lobby doors of the theatre. If anything, he could hear the fucker chuckling even as Craig walked in and scanned the lobby for one particular head of messy blonde hair.
‘This was a mistake’
He didn’t want to admit that the voice in the back of his head, might be right this time. The entire situation felt odd, unnatural, and most definitely didn’t feel like it was supposed to. His white dress shirt was suddenly way too loose, even where he had rolled the sleeves up around his elbows. His black tie was too tight, constricting panicked breathing as his eyes continued to scan the front movie lobby for who he was expecting. At that rate, he should really call this shit for what it was. A date. The only problem, was that this was not some minor date. It was a first date with someone he had been working up the courage to ask out for years. They had been dancing around it for a few months, at least Craig had been thinking about it. It consumed him sometimes, what they would say to being asked out to something as lame as going to the movies, whether they would like it, whether they even thought of Craig in that way. If he had to bet, he would bet that they probably didn’t. It was probably just a lame pity date for a delinquent and friend, that way they wouldn’t ruin their friendship over this-
Craig was just starting to shuffle, balancing on the heels of his feet that dug into worn down converse as he attempted to bring his mind to something less depressing. His worn down shoes scuff against the shining lobby floor, who the fuck decided that ‘starry night’ tiles were a great idea in a movie theatre anyway? Bringing his mind away from the thoughts that loomed like storm clouds, was surely a task that was more easily said than done, he felt like every middle aged couple there was wondering exactly what he was. What the hell was a guy like him doing in a movie theatre on a Friday night, he could be off drinking or smoking behind a dumpster. But instead here he was, waiting for some cute jackass to show up a whole four minutes later than they agreed-
“Hey! I’m sorry I’m late. Karen needed to be dropped off at a friends house and she couldn’t find her favorite shoes before we went-.” Craig barely had time to recognize and comprehend what the hell was happening and what exactly Kenny was rambling on about before a barely shorter frame barrelled into him. The force of Kenny’s tackled hug was almost enough to knock him over, surely enough to send him fumbling forward a few steps. He was sure he looked like an idiot as his kind of- boyfriend pushed him forward and had begun the embarrassing act of rubbing his head against Craig’s back in some sort of non-verbal apology that only made him that much more red in the cheeks. He didn’t dare look at the few middle aged couples around still, he could feel their prying eyes on his skin, burning through his nice shirt and the hands that rested on his abdomen that belonged to none other than Kenny McCormick.
“Kenny, it’s alright-” Craig barely got that brief of a sentence out before Kenny was going on and on once again. Rather, by the time he had begun speaking he had released Craig’s abdomen and was standing beside his boyfriend, one arm slung around his shoulders as Craig got used to the sensation of his own arm wrapped around Kenny’s waist. “I know I know. Hey I was thinking that we go see the Conjuring and then we go check out that stupid rom com that’s supposed to be right after? That way we can make out in the back and scare all of the old couples. I mean I’ve always wanted to do it, just never had anyone to do it with and I figure that our date doesn’t have to end after just one movie ya’know? We can hang out here and steal some hot dogs and-…” After that point of rushed speech, Craig wasn’t listening. He couldn’t listen, what with his mind being fried at how happy he was. All of those looming fears and doubts were swept away just as swiftly as he swept up Kenny’s lips in a swift kiss. Kenny, the energetic, full of life man he was, looked more shocked than a nearby elderly woman who spit out her popcorn back into the bag and earned a swift middle finger from Craig.
“Might as well start early on freaking out the old people. Yea?” Craig offers, a smirk twisting one edge of his lips up and lighting up those cobalt eyes so that they were nearly as entrancing as any movie.
“Freaking out old people, stealing food, making out-…How’d you know what kind of first date I like?” Nevermind that they had been friends for years, doing this every other weekend and making out on the weekends that they hadn’t been at the movies. The only difference now, was that they were both sporting the best clothing they could, and the making out was now just moved locations. At least that left open more time to video games.
“Just a hunch babe. Now let’s go get some free food.”
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