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pinkhairedlily · 5 months

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tadaima

sharing my piece for @sasusakubpzine which i'm so grateful to have been selected for. we are holding leftover sales so get a copy now if you haven't yet! 🛒-> https://t.co/DM3t6gqkDo

“Tadaima!”

Sasuke heard this greeting many times when they were kids. After classes, after missions, after errands. Everyone had families to come home to. Only Sakura had this privilege in their team, her parents still alive, but never once did he catch her uttering it.

He envied her regardless. However casual and mundane the word was to her, he craved to use it. Maybe letters strung together could bring back his dead.

But it was Sakura, his anchor after the war, who made it possible again. “Tadaima.”

And today, he’ll hear her say it to her family.

Only that, she isn’t herself. He sees her plant a longer kiss on Sarada’s forehead and feels her squeeze his arm a little tighter, signs of her anxiety bursting to the brim.

“We can go another time.”

Sakura shakes her head and grins her way out of his silent prodding. “Let’s take advantage of this while we can. A complete family. I can show them that.”

A complete family. Sasuke always thought Sakura had it easy, but not all families mean home.

x x x

Sasuke hears the Harunos before he sees them. Their noise is as loud as their eclectic hair styles and colors, but they quiet down when they register their arrival. The grand entrance ends on a neutral note when Sakura beckons him to the empty seats beside her parents at the center table. Hot seats.

Kizashi and Mebuki manage lukewarm nods towards the three of them. Not so much as a kiss or hug for Sakura or an awed expression for Sarada inside her baby wrap. Sasuke doesn’t know which of the two irks him more.

The luncheon goes well for the first half. Everyone keeps to their little conversations. The meat is a little too hard and the broth a little too rich, but nothing out of ordinary. Perhaps it’s the food coma that makes some cousins plant their attention on them.

“Did you learn love potions at that ninja academy?” Eyeliner Guy asks. “Couldn’t think of any other way.”

Sakura smiles. “No, but I'm an expert with poisons.”

The death threat flies over their heads.

“You probably baby-trapped him, no?” Thick Lipstick side-eyes him. “What a catch.”

Sasuke tries to smile, if only for his wife’s sake, but his annoyance seeps through his reply. “Great theories, but we actually met at the academy, fell in love later on, and got married. Contrary to what you think, Sakura is quite the catch.” He takes a sip of his now-cold tea. “I’m sure you’ll find someone in your forties. Don’t lose hope.”

Sakura almost chokes on her dango. “She’s in her twenties, Sasuke,” she chastises under her breath.

“Such a shame we didn’t see your marriage registry. We tried to find it, you know,” Green Mohawk smacks his lips, “for fun.”

“We got married outside the village, but we appreciate your effort.” He hopes his cold tone diffuses their burning curiosity, bordering on assault.

Some old people gravitate towards their seats upon hearing this. “We heard you came from traveling.”

“Ah, yes, the Land of Flowers was so beautiful.” Sakura tries to turn the conversation light, but no one takes her bait.

“Wasn’t that too dangerous during your pregnancy?” Paper Fan Grandma asks.

“You should’ve been more careful, Sakura,” Mebuki chastises, “And you should’ve known better, boy.”

“It’s Sasuke,” Sakura butts in, “And Mom, I’m a doctor. I can take care of myself.”

Mebuki not remembering his name doesn’t bother him as much as her occupation escaping them.

“So what’s your work, Sasuke?” Cigarette Smoking Uncle asks.

Sasuke has half a mind to use amaterasu on the nicotine stick. “I have duties beyond the borders of the village.”

“Ah, you’re always traveling then?” Paper Fan Grandma loves to gasp a lot.

“You could put it like that.”

“And you leave her? With a baby?”

“Sakura is very important in the village. She’s the hospital director.”

The three cousins sneer loudly at this while the older group does not feign their disappointment and tut-tuts. Sakura’s grip on his thigh tightens.

“This is why I keep telling her to focus on being a housewife,” Mebuki tells her husband as if Sakura is not in front of them. “The horrors of being a single mom! Did you hear what happened to Ayako? In debt and cheated on!”

Sakura is a strong woman.

She never backs out from a fight or cowers in fear. She faces all her battles head-on. She has grown out of the shells of her childhood and adolescence and into these beautiful myriad of forms: a healer, a soldier, a mother, a wife.

“I can balance my work —”

But this Sakura’s voice wavers and he sees how one of Konoha’s pillars regresses into an insecure girl who only wants her family to see her, know her, and accept her.

Kizashi scoffs. “Sakura, do you know how hard it was to raise you? Your mother and I lost count of the sleepless nights we had because you wanted to become a ninja.”

Green Mohawk adds, “Bad decision. You’re lucky you came back in one piece.” He throws an apologetic look at Sasuke’s lost arm.

Arthritic Grandpa points his cane at Sarada. “A child with two nin parents? Preposterous. Ninjas don’t grow well. They become orphans.”

Sakura stiffens beside Sasuke. He offers her his hand which she clasps in support, but really, it was just to stop her from springing when he says his piece, “Then I’m glad Sakura grew up okay despite being related to you. Clearly, you didn’t know her capabilities– or you only pretended to.”

A look of shock passes through their faces. Sarada takes the momentary silence to wiggle out of her baby wrap and onto Sakura’s lap. She squeezes her Mama’s cheeks, a gentle gesture of, Don’t worry Mama. I love you.

The manager of the restaurant also swoops into the awkward exchange by bringing the bill and a blank paper. “It’s a pleasure to have you dine with us, Dr. Uchiha. You saved my sister in an invasion once, but you probably don’t remember it anymore.”

Sasuke silently thanks the man for reminding Sakura what she is, what she has become.

Sakura smiles. Finding her footing, she quickly gives her autograph “for display” and nods to Sasuke. At this cue, he gives the manager a wad of cash and ushers his family out of the restaurant without so much of a goodbye to anyone else.

x x x

"I think I made a good impression." Sasuke breaks the silence as they enter their home.

Sakura's shoulders — broad, strong, dependable — tremble. But it's only laughter she can't contain.

"You sure did." A soft grumble passes between them and she erupts in louder chuckles. "Can't believe I paid for food I haven't eaten. I'm so hungry."

As they enter the kitchen, his shoulders rub hers, another language meant to hold her hand. "Great timing then."

“Okaerinasai!” Kakashi, Iruka, and Yamato, caliber soldiers, rightfully feared, don brightly-patterned aprons as they rambunctiously navigate a foreign space. Clutter decorates the countertops, and different, appetizing smells permeate the corners.

It smells like home.

Sasuke watches Sakura’s face light up at the chaotic sight.

Sarada is quickly lifted off Sasuke's embrace into the cradle made by three pairs of arms, and her greeting involves biting the cheeks of her uncles — her attempt at a kiss.

"No fair, Yamato. Don't turn your cheeks into wood!" Iruka bursts out. "It's painful for Sara— ow!"

"You forget she's Sakura's daughter." Yamato massages the flushed red side of his cheek where thick gums and milk teeth had clamped down hard.

Kakashi heeds fair warnings. "Now Sara-chan, why don't I kiss you instead?" But the toddler has other plans as stubby fingers pull down his mask.

“Now don’t hog my goddaughter like that.” The three house-nins part for Tsunade whose arms are already open for Sakura. “How’s my best student?”

Where no one touched her earlier, here she is received. In laughter, in pats, in hugs. Casual, mundane things that tell of love.

It feels like home.

“I didn’t invite you.” Sasuke notices the two empty sake bottles on the sink. “But I see you’ve already made yourself welcome.”

“Kakashi said this is my homecoming. Besides, you rarely play host.” Tsunade shrugs, her innocence quickly morphing into slyness. “Why don’t we play cards?”

Another bottle to the mix and a relocation to the patio later, the fifth hokage finds herself losing with an expectant audience.

"Sakura, sit next to your shishou.”

"Sakura, no."

A student still obeys her master, and like clockwork, a gust of wind loosens her top. Sasuke grimaces at the distraction.

"Aha. I win!" Tsunade puts down her hand. "See, Sakura, you're always my lucky charm."

“Don’t tell me you didn’t see that coming?” Iruka jests.

“I recommend Icha-Icha’s Education Against Seduction.” Kakashi pulls a book out of his apron to give to his former student, but Yamato’s the first one to flip through the pages.

Annoyed, Sasuke turns to a half-flustered, half-laughing Sakura. “She cheated. Again. How did she even become your teacher?”

“How did you even become her husband?” Tsunade rolls her eyes. “I bet Orochimaru taught you love potions. Why would the most beautiful kunoichi even marry you?”

“She has the best chakra control,” Kakashi pipes, “I bet Sakura can beat your genjutsu now.”

“Monstrous strength for a doctor.” A specific memory sends shivers to Yamato’s spine. “Don’t let her fix your bones while conscious.”

A consensus runs through the group which stops Sakura’s laughter. “Are these supposed to be compliments? Why do I feel offended?”

Inside her crib, Sarada giggles. Iruka leans down to her and whispers in acquiescence, “I know. She’s a loving mother too. You’re gonna grow up fine, Sara-chan.”

Sasuke trains his sight on Sakura whose face is painted in happiness. There is nothing to prove, nothing to say, nothing to do. She is seen for what she is, all the sides and parts of her that make her her: a student, a doctor, a wife, a mother.

A loud bang interrupts the scene, followed by a powerful rush of chakra.

"Good evening, constituents!" Clad in his hokage robes, Naruto commits to his ceremonious entrance. Only Sarada spares him attention with a delighted cooo-caaa.

"Did you bring it?" Tsunade drawls over her words. Already too drunk to balance, she is leaning against Yamato, who looks like a still painting in front of the fire.

Naruto presents another bottle of sake to the group with a flourish. "Of course, old woman!" Despite his desire to hold off on additional liquor, Sasuke accepts the gift.

x x x

The bottle, emptied after making several rounds in the group, now lies under Sakura's feet. The crowded bench trickled down to the three of them, the rest having already found abode on living room futons, limbs all splayed out and tangled like close friends under the warmth of the covers, with Sarada at the center of them all.

In the dark, Sakura's shoulders are hunched, free of the tension that hounded her this morning. The fading embers dance in her jade eyes.

"It had been a long time since we gathered like this." Her words trail smoke in the wintry air. "Too bad Sai had Yamanaka duties."

Naruto chuckles. "He missed a rare sighting of dancer Yamato."

"With deadpan expressions to boot."

Both of them turn to Sasuke at the same time and laughter spills out.

"No, I’m not drunk." Sasuke holds up his sole hand at the wordless prompting, but he puts it down quickly when his world starts spinning out of orbit. Yep, he’s drunk.

"You're no fun." Naruto sticks out his chin in defiance. "Why don't we play a game?"

Sakura claps in agreement. She somehow salvaged a third of the wine's content from their teachers for their drinking game.

"Take a shot if you did this," Sakura grins too widely. "Never have I ever failed a subject in the academy."

The boys clink their glasses and drink. Alcohol tastes like water when you get used to it.

"What? Sasuke failed?" Sakura's pitch climbs a bit higher.

It's an embarrassing admission, "I hated History." Sasuke wonders if his path of revenge would have taken a different trajectory if he had paid more attention. "Never have I ever failed a practical."

"What are these non-controversial questions?" Naruto snorts and empties his glass. Sakura smugly follows suit. "The know-it-all shows himself."

Sasuke shrugs, grateful to be spared from this round, because my god, I can't feel my legs. To be fair, he's doing a good job pretending he's fine. How is Naruto holding up so well?

"Okay, last question, and I have to go home to Hinata." Naruto swirls the remaining contents of the bottle. Probably good for only two shots.

"Hmm," Sasuke sees him rack his brain for more scandalous questions, but it's the one he picks that sears his insides. "Never have I ever fallen in love with a teammate while we were genin!"

“I hate you! That’s not how it works!”

“I’m too drunk to think of anything else!”

Sasuke swipes the bottle away from their reaching hands and swigs it into his mouth. He hopes it numbs down these butterflies and palpitations and somersaults that time traveled when he tried to touch her rosette strands as she scribbled furiously during History class.

"Sasuke-kun? You switched up the rules. You’re supposed to drink when it’s true.”

Sakura turns to Naruto, usually competitive, but has no protestations on this development.

“But it’s true.” The bottle goes round and round in his hand. “I liked Sakura back then,” he sighs his confession into the open, this secret no longer his own.

“No way.”

“I wasn’t just as loud about it.” Sasuke takes another swig, forgetting it’s empty, and the bottle comes loose in his fingers. “It actually faded you know,” he adds a dash of nonchalance, but Sakura, as she always does, sees through him.

“It’s true, Sakura-chan,” Naruto echoes, “Or maybe his definition of like is ‘the only girl he can tolerate’.” That earns him a good old slap on the back of the head.

They’re twelve again, struggling to be teammates, bickering at every conversation, and building bonds Sasuke thought he could fray.

This is family.

“Stop smiling.”

“I can’t stop.”

“You’re as annoying as you were then.”

x x x x

“What was the occasion?” The question hangs in the silence of midnight as she settles on her side of the bed. Sasuke adjusts his body to her presence, accommodating her curling limbs, like fitting two puzzle pieces.

“Nothing. I told them I missed them,” he lies.

Sakura needs her family, that was the message. She needs her home.

His fingers intertwine with the strands he liked, strands he loves. Underneath his skin, he feels her let go of wakefulness, dreams already waiting to claim her.

A murmur, a prayer, as she leaves the day, “Tadaima.”

FIN.

Thanks for reading!

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