#here comes the self doubt

[arcadekore]

Being an adhd creative sucks I can’t ever stick with working on just one story they’re constantly rotating in my head how does anyone just stick to one story or set of OCs what’s your secret

#god I wish I could have just stuck to one oc instead of having like 28838484 million #this is mostly rhetorical btw I’ve always been like this and I don’t rly plan to change #I just feel bad when one person comes here for a specific thing I drew and meanwhile I’m on stage three of hyperfixation #sorry for anyone who followed me for dairyshipping I am so burnt out on pokemon #and im worried that im already getting burnt out on celesteverse but i think its just me self doubting myself

[lieutenant-amuel]

Gabriel Núñez - ESTJ - Te-Si-Ne-Fi

ESTJs are hardworking traditionalists, eager to take charge in organizing projects and people. Orderly, rule-abiding, and conscientious, ESTJs like to get things done, and tend to go about projects in a systematic, methodical way.

Source

#Elena of Avalor #Gabriel Nunez #Gabe Nunez #Gifs #I said once I wanted to make a MBTI inspired gifset of Gabe #and so here comes one of the most self-indulgent things I've ever made 🥳 #Gabe is a 100% ESTJ and I love it for him #Adkfjkf just a quick note that introverted feeling is not a bad function or anything #It's just the inferior function of ESTJ and so Gabe is bad at using it #Also a fun fact #This is the first gifset of mine that I tried to colour myself #I usually just use filters #Although I really doubt it's noticeable I coloured it myself akhskdk #Anyway it was quite difficult and now I admire gifmakers even more

[sysig]

I like him a normal amount (lying) (Patreon)

#Doodles #SCII #Helix #Max Vyer #Dexter Favin #Was I about to type ''Helix Mainfic'' in reference to these wh - I mean Technically but??? #Anyway lol #Couple'a random Max's to start <3 Love him #So some of these were made with my .5 and some with my .3 - can you guess which ones? :3 #The first one and the last two (and of me lol) were my .5 - the inner three are .3 ♪ #You know it's gotten bad when it's not even an Idea necessarily just Want To Draw Pretty - I'm familiar with that pft #He's pretty tho! Love Max ♥ #Man if Max's snap had come in the form of Fight rather than Flight - he's a twig but I doubt Anyone would've come out of that unscathed #Anger can make a monster out of almost anybody haha #Pretty boy ♥ My .3 is so fun for soft detailing! And Max is pretty much all soft details lol #Cryings ah </3 Dexter's mention of Max's emotions in his meetup with ZEX got me thinking! #Sadness really does trend low on the emotions he's willing to express in company - even when Dex has seen him cry before - like here #It was out of anger so much more than sadness - no wonder he was spooked by ZEX's sudden grief! Max is fairly private with sadness #Or at least he turns it into anger if he's backed into a corner - drinking by himself and making things harder for everyone else haha #And finally his and Dex's difference in the retelling of the story!! Hehe ♪♫ #Since I first read Helix I've been under the impression that what Max told Katherine was - well - how he described it lol #A kind of self-deprecating joke at his own expense - thus his confusion at her reaction of seeming hurt #But that's not what he said at all! That's not even close to how he told it!! Hahaha ♪ Biased narration <3 #I even got a second opinion and we shared the same interpretation so it wasn't just a matter of failing to pick up his meaning hehehe Max! #He's so rude ♥ Terrible man ♪ He's the worst <3

[happi-tree]

soooooo i don't have much new to post for wipweds this week so i thought i'd grab a little something from my archives! a ton more people were curious about The Raven and The Dove than i expected, so here's a little excerpt from my amphibia school for good and evil au! in which marcy learns a tiny bit of archery and sasha has some Feelings about it 💗💚

#i was so taken by this scene in the movie that it was literally the first thing i wrote for this au. head in my hands gay people real <3 #the sasharcy in this. very self-indulgent very off the charts. the sashanne and marcanne too but that is not the focus here lmao #anyway. hiiiiiii amphibia fandom i am not like. super dead dndads has just had a very sudden and firm grasp on my heart as of late hsbfkahv #also there's a brief glimpse at sasha's backstory here. it really sucks when you're meant to be the paragon of all that is good and pure #and you have the eyes of an entire realm on you at all times. and you keep pushing the envelope of what's proper #i.e. not wearing the frilly dresses all of the time taking up fighting etc. this would already be hard enough if you were a regular student #but you aren't that. everyone is watching you and has Expectations for you and you know what you want but you can't let yourself have it #so you just repress things so hard. cling to whatever you can get away with and try your very best to excel at everything they let you have #and then in come marcy and anne and you've never seen two people less concerned with The Rules. their existence itself flips the script #and you have NO idea what to do about that! other than panic internally ofc <3 #anywho. sorry the sasha bias really came through with this one i just think her pov in this would be so inch resting #okok i'm done now i promise #cartoons #amphibia #sasharcy #happi scribbles #happi rambles #also. if ppl like this please do lmk bc while i doubt i'll finish this i do have a few more disjointed bits i could post up for y'all <3 #tartd au

[dykedragons]

my job is going so awesome yeeeeey

#ramblies #ITS MY LAST WEEK HERE. SAD. it aint year round #but ogh im so glad i stuck thru the hard parts and the self doubt bc im actually kicking ass a little bit #i do enjoy it quite a bit. excited to come back before school yeeeey #(and my boss WANTS me back which is very extra poggers i rlly quite like them)

[malediictus]

the thing i love about jinx is that ever since vi left her she is constantly prepared for everyone to betray / abandon her like it is core to her being she expects to be fucked over, but (here's the thing) she always instigates the betrayal. she deliberately pushes people away and tests them and breaks them to the point they break away or even just flinch and she takes that as betrayal and so sees herself as always correct in suspicion and testing them in the first place and by "i love this" i mean i'm in tears

#a self fulfilling prophecy borne of trauma she cannot / will not break!!! #betrayal is so nebulous too bc jinx takes the most arbitrary thing as crossing her #she lashes out so ferociously when silco puts her on standby like that is not just anger at punishment #he DOUBTED her #me: not sure if im coming back #also me: here's 10 billion thoughts about jinx's motivations and griefs #( IV. ) OOC. / I WANT YOU TO LOSE LIKE I LOSE WHEN I PLAY.

[satanfemme]

being both gnc and trans is so hard sometimes. it's like, I'll face adversity for being gnc/trans/whatever-strangers-read-me-as, and in addition to the normal base-level difficultly and pain and fear of these experiences, I'll also feel on some level like it's "my own fault" too because this is what I purposefully decided to be.

I often dress/act like a girl but have a deep voice/facial hair/flat chest -- and I opted in for all of those. I spent more money than I can conceptualize in order to medically transition in those ways. while, in theory, I could've saved the money, not transitioned, continued dressing/acting the same way as I do now, and the problem would no longer exist... in theory. ofc logically I know that's not at all how it works. if I hadn't transitioned I would feel even worse. and the way I'd experience & express gender would still be intrinsically different from "cis girl" -- that's true regardless of how my body looks or sounds. which should all go without saying, because I very obviously don't conform to my CAGAB either. if I did I wouldn't be in this mess!! u know?

...but the self-blame is still there, because for better or for worse I did go out of my way to become myself. <- feels like a truism.

#the other big self doubt-y issue I've been experiencing lately re: being gnc and trans #is feeling like I'm ''faking'' something. to sooo many people I've just come out as a femme/nonbinary man #with no mentions of my cagab cause that's not something I like to share around irl lol #and then I complain ofc about how I'm treated for being feminine. and everyone gives me sympathy which is nice #but it's hard to fully accept cause I wonder how many of them are assuming I was shunned the same way growing up. #when in reality I was punished for not being feminine *enough*. #and ik it shouldn't/doesn't matter in this context. I still struggled then and I still struggle now; they don't cancel out #but it almost feels like I ''tricked'' my way into a marginalization that I don't ''actually'' belong in. idk #like as if I'm ''secretly'' a girl and just pretending my normal girlhood is subversive for attention #or like I should have just been content with the relative safety of my assigned social role #(hm... where have I heard ''why can't you just be ok with being a girl?'' and ''they're just doing it for attention'' before 🤔) #it's def leaps of logic & self-directed transphobia all around but it's hard to shake #and there's a real fear somewhere mixed into it all too of ''what if someone finds out my cagab and decides I'm not actually trans/a man - #- by *their* transphobic logic. even if they previous supported me''. #anyway I hope no one minds the long vent-y post. I needed to sort out my emotions here lol #I have an old ''omg I love being confusing and ambiguous XD'' post gaining notes rn for some reason and #seeing it again while mentally working thru the above just made me feel ill and confused and guilty. feeling better now <3 #and I do love being trans & I love being a femme & I love being a man with a broad and fluid gender #it's just hard too sometimes

[trashgoblincreature]

so. uh. chapter 4 is pretty much done but like. i might not release it until chapter 5 is also done?? mostly because i feel weird posting a chapter that's. mostly just filler because it wouldnt make sense to just. skip almost an entire year in order to get to the good parts

it's mostly just me being weird about it?? but. idk. i dont want it to be so underwhelming ig

#ack here comes the self doubt #i love doing hours of writing just to then when its done question if its actually worth posting-

[the-smallest-gremlin]

i got size 12 jeans today. i actually have no idea if they will fit but i sure as hell will make them!!!

#i need to limit myself #maybe like 600 calories a day? #i think i could manage that #i already lost 5 pounds #i can’t wait ti lose more #self destructive mode here i come lol! #just hopefully not too much to where i ruin the relationship that i just got into #but i doubt that i will! #tinythingx #tinybitch

[slightlyplant]

y’all really like talking about hitori today huh? ok my hot take for the afternoon is that he could beat shuu to death if he really really wanted to

#he didn’t have the courage in bbl #shuu isn’t strong enough to fight back super hard and i doubt hitori is like Super Muscular or anything but #it makes sense that he’d maybe learn some basic self defense or fighting to protect the hatoful house kids if anything happened #esp in the Tumultuous Times the game takes place in where conflict is around every corner so he WOULD know how to punch somebody imo #even if he didn’t it would take just a 10% increase in his murderous desires if nageki hadn’t talked him out of it when he was w ryouta #like he’d just come out of the room with a liver and be like ‘aw darn guess i’m outta bullets. guess i’ve gotta do everything around here’ #just saying that HE HAS IT IN HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #thanks for listening to my hitori take

[anunkindncss]

Definitely beginning to feel like I’m hard to interact with.

#ooc; #//here comes that wicked self doubt man

[isabelguerra]

paranatural would be so good if the characters had intended symbolism and core beliefs and things behind them that drove a specific meaning. rather than being tools for shonen anime pseudomocking

#like all joming aside the comic is funny but thats it. its funny. its made to be funny. it has some wacky lines gets some good reactions #its funny. but i dont think its a good story anymore. #like let’s really think about this for a moment. what is paranatural about. #4 years ago i wouldnt said ‘kids fighting ghosts in their wacky hometown’ but theh havent done that in ages. theres no trace of that story #and there hasnt been since chapter 5 ended #digging further- thats just plot. what is it ABOUT? the power of friendship? the perseverance to protect the ones you love? #i used to love max for his down-to-earth straight man grounded perspective. max wasnt funny. max was reasonable and the contrast of that #reason against the nonsense of the town is what MADE him funny. #like the other day when i posted the comparison between ch4’s hallway specshot scene and the one from fridays page #max isnt being funny in the hallway. ‘why am i here’ is put against Haha Woww So Deel Max Lol to which he can reply no i mean study hall. #his reaction is rational. the sarcasm adds humor but its rather the world around him which is so newly strange that his normalcy is funny #and then versus the new page. max makes a Why Am I Here joke again. but this time the question is not asked by max the character who wants #to know why his father has dragged him to a kids entertainment zone. but rather is asked as the setup for an #Unexpected Quirky Classic Max One-Liner ‘no i meant on this earth why do i exist’ #it just feels so much flatter. max isnt aloof and uncaring and sarcastic because he doesnt care about anything or anyone and is untouchable. #max is standoffish but genuinely nice and caring for the people he meets. his first instinct after landing on johnnys face #is to ask if hes alright. when PJ feels distraught at not being important in his own death maxes first instinct is to find a way to make him #feel better. to challenge that perspective and doubt the viewpoint his own poor self esteem gives him #when isabel comes out of her spirit trance and is too shocked to move max immediately rushes to her side to protect her against a spirit hes #terrified of. and then the next day brings what happened up to her and says hes sorry she went through that and hes got her back #he BREAKS HIS ARM TO PROTECT JOHNNY AGAINST HIJACK #hes a good protagonist because even though he has trouble connecting to others and being super friendly hes still NICE!!!! he still CARES!!! #i might take these tags and just make them a new post this turned into loving max hours #paranatural

[t-u-i-t-c]

chapter xxxi

#kr saber lb #kr lb #umbrella.thoughts #umbrella.posts #friendship will always win out in the end people #it wins and we get little pins :) #rintaro has a lot of self-doubt and anger at himself but he needs to know that touma didn't get here over night and that they aren't the #same people so they'll be different even in strength but that they are both truly strong #believing in his own power and letting others believe in him will let him discover his strengths and weaknesses #allowing him to grow both as a swordsman and as a person #also kento you wanna be part of the family so bad come on you'll realize it soon enough #the promise was made with 4 people and you're one of them #also ik that bird's going to hold some significance like why get it a voice? they could've just had yuri understand birds...curious... #sidenote: what do storious and logos have going on bc...

[cannibalisticskittles]

when i'm stressed and in a time crunch -- which is a lot of my time, lately, and will probably continue to be the majority of my life for at least the next year until i've gotten my teaching certification and can be done with extra schooling -- i tend to... fixate. on various things. i was going to say that doing that helps, but I'm not sure that's true. it might just be something that i do.

anyway. for a few months, it was The Cosplay. every moment i wasn't actively teaching or studying or writing assignments or lessons, i was thinking about The Cosplay and what to do to move that forward. right now, it's baldur's gate 3.

which is a longwinded way of saying that in between work and assignments, i'm going full charlie kelly conspiracy board over amity and her romantic choices in bg3

#like 'on the ONE HAND we have her debilitating self-doubt' #'but ever since the burning tent she's been able to accept that there are some people in this world that genuinely care for her' #'but she hasn't known any of them long and these are new waters' #'and she's also aware that she may be dying which could push her dramatically in EITHER direction' #all these scribbled notes and strings leading to a pinned red question in the middle -- #'WHAT HAPPENS WHEN AMITY GETS PROPOSITIONED AT A BONFIRE AFTER MOWING DOWN AN ARMY OF GOBLINS???' #i don't have a lot of time to be thinking about this but in those rare free moments #i keep coming back. here. lmao. #TO BE FAIR everything else is a pretty easy choice for her #not many other points where i wonder what would be most fitting for her current characterization

[bkghq]

hello everyone ! how's everyone been ? i'm ( hopefully ) back, n i'll be working on new pieces soon enough :3

#ᝰ — yaya rambles! #life has been . . . funny ? alot of unexpected stuff happened #a lil update : me n my ex ( yes now ex lmao ) broke up don't wna get into detail why but ! it wasn't good #it took a toll on my mental health not bc i missed him or something but j the self doubt seed was rly deep rooted #i'm doing saur saur saurr better now ! i have some of the best people around me atm n i wna come back on here n get back 2 writing <33 #i've been keeping up w bnha ! love the eps bones have animated bakugo saur well :') #aaa that's all 4 me #how have you all been :>

[oflostinfound]

Jewel wraps an awkward arm around Hax’s shoulder.

“Hey, you’re pretty good to eath and me. If that’s anything to go by.” She’s trying to comfort her friend.

@sparedareitspiecesasitflies

@sparedareitspiecesasitflies in reference to This

|| 💛 ||: ❝ That's... different. My parents still had friends. They weren't like that to everyone, friends don't see tough love like family does. They were always cordial with them. ❞

|| 💛 ||: ❝ What if I turn out just like them? If I look in the mirror one day and see my father or my mother staring back at me and it's too late. I've already hurt my baby and I- they-- they hate me- ❞

#sparedareitspiecesasitflies #💚 || ask answered #💚 || anon #💛 || ic post #self doubt tw #abuse mention tw #🚼 || event; first child #pregnancy tw #{ you know i wasn't sure when the topic of how fucking awful hax's parents are was going to come up but here we be } #{ makes sense though b/c they want so badly to be a good parent }