#fuck this guy has a bonkers filmography

[himboskywalker]

I heard something about a list of all the movies where Ewan appears naked and that there is some serious stuff over his stuff and I am ashamed but also intrigued to ask what 👀

Sksksksksk you came to the right person. I’ve made a list before of Ewan McGregor’s naked filmography. But aside from the basic list,if you want my personal opinion the best of those films are Trainspotting 1 & 2,Velvet Goldmine,The Pillow Book, Young Adam,and Perfect Sense.

Velvet Goldmine(1998) is about the 1970s British glam rock scene and follows the career of a fixtionalized David Bowie (played by Jonathan Myers) and his musical partner and eventual lover,a fictionalized Iggy Pop (played by Ewan McGregor). The movie itself is great just for the soundtrack and exposure of the 70s-90s British underground music scenes. The film changed queer representation in film and is one of the best in lgbtq film history. And this is my favorite role Jonathan Myers has ever played,but we’re here for McGregor. His character is just joyfully filthy and raunchy and he’s this drugged out American rockstar who literally could not give one iota of a single shit. In a scene where Ewan’s character is singing a live rock performance (and it is Ewan singing) he strips down completely naked,dances and generally goes insane,and we see him full frontal nude through the scene. There’s also a couple gay sex scenes and he literally rails Christian Bail on a rooftop 10/10 film all around.

Trainspotting 1 & 2 (1996 & 2017) Okay I’ll be completely honest here. Trainspotting is on my top 5 favorite films of all time list and I think it has the best movie soundtrack ever made. For those of you who’ve never seen it it’s based off Irvine Welsh’s book and highlights the heroin crisis and general drug crisis in Glasgow during the 1990s. Glasgow was the heroine capital of the world at the time and this movie,just as a note,changed film history in many ways,and changed how the public perceived drug addiction at the time of its release. Ewan plays the protagonist who is trying to get clean but all of his insane friends keep dragging him back into their shenanigans. But you guys don’t want my filmography essay,we’re here for Ewan’s dick and boy is it there! Ewan may be buzz headed and heroine skinny and pale as death but I would still absolutely get it. Trainspotting made history for Ewan’s nude scene,and while it’s brief,the whole movie is totally worth it. Its sequel which came out in ‘17 is genuinely so fucking good and is one of the few sequels I’ve watched that I’m deeply glad got made. It wouldn’t be Trainspotting without a naked Ewan McGregor and in the sequel he’s 20 years older with hair and I’d call him daddy, so double win. 10/10

The Pillow Book(1994) I won’t lie,it’s a Godamn weird and absolute bonkers of a movie. It’s a foreign film about a Japanese woman who has the kink of writing calligraphy on people’s skin and having it done to her. It is a fascinating and very blunt examination of women’s sexuality,especially in such a restricted culture for the subject as Japan in the early 90s. Ewan plays a British translater who falls in love with her. So half this movie is him buck ass naked with Japanese letters just painted all over him. He also is getting railed by his male publisher and there’s a very interesting scene where he’s just like,proffered to the man naked and covered in writing? It’s wild and the movie ends horribly but Ewan is also gorgeous and young in it and naked or fucking in almost every scene he’s in. I don’t know how to rate this one because anything where you can watch Ewan’s dick hanging around for like 30 minutes is great,but also the rest of the movie is like having a really weird dream when you’re crossfaded.

Young Adam (2003) This film is NC17 and is basically Ewan’s character trying to fuck every woman he’s ever met. He plays an English barge worker who is involved with the death of a woman who floats to shore where he works. So the film revolves around this woman’s death while he’s also fucking his boss’s wife (Tilda Swinton). The full frontal nude scene is brief but when he’s not naked he’s fucking in clothes and Ewan’s chemistry with Swinton is just *chef’s kiss* I also love how this film is shot and beyond hearing Ewan McGregor moan I actually wanted to know how this movie ended. 8/10

Perfect Sense (2012) God I love this movie,God I love this movie. Okay this one is mostly on the list because of how beautiful Ewan is in it and how much I just love the whole film. He is full frontal in it very briefly and there are some truly fantastic sex scenes,but Jesus this movie just makes me cry. Ewan plays a chef in Glasgow who takes smoke breaks under (Eva Green’s) window. She can’t stand him at first but it’s chef Ewan McGregor and no one can resist that. But the main part of the film is actually the end of the world and it hits way too close to home right now with Covid because it’s a disease that slowly start knocking people’s senses out one by one. The film is just so gorgeous and a truly moving examination of love and what it means to be human,and how that definition can change for us. But seriously,this is one of my favorite roles for Ewan,and he’s so astoundingly gorgeous in this movie and you can see his actual real tattoo the whole time so 10/10

These are just my favorites from his (full frontal)naked filmography. If anyone is a McGregor fan in general my other absolute favorites of his are Big Fish,Moulin Rouge and Zoe. (And Star Wars but also duh)

#ewan mcgregor #ewan mcgregor films #trainspotting #velvet goldmine #young adam #the pillow book #perfect sense #star wars #zoe #moulin rouge #big fish #non star wars recs

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Michael After Midnight: Little Nicky

Adam Sandler is one of the strangest celebrities I’ve ever seen. The guy can go from making some genuinely funny, heartwarming, and enjoyable comedies that you’ll ever see – The Wedding Singer, 50 First Dates, Hotel Transylvania – to making some of the most stupid, inane, and insulting garbage you’ll ever have the misfortune of sitting through (see: most of his modern work). But what many don’t realize is that there is a secret, third side to the Adam Sandler coin: the absolutely fucking bonkers Adam Sandler movie. As ar as I know, there’s only one film in the Sandler filmography that fits the bill for that, and that film is Little Nicky.

This movie is so utterly strange, even for an early 2000s comedy. This film has it all: lowest common denominator jokes, clever gags, tons of celebrity cameos, a pretty solid plot field with all sorts of fantastical weirdness, Adam Sandler doing an annoying voice, blatant product placement… Hell, this movie doesn’t even just have product placement, it is a film that uses the one “fuck” permitted to PG-13 films for its product placement, for God’s sake! This is one of the most bonkers of Sandler’s films, and thus, one of my personal favorites.

So let me tell you the plot so I can help you understand: Nicky is one of the three sons of Satan himself (played by Harvey Keitel) who is treated like garbage by his brothers Cassius and Adrian (Tommy Lister and Rhys Ifans, respectively). When Satan decides that none of his sons are worthy of ruling Hell, Cassius and Adrian conspire to go to Earth and turn it into a literal Hell world to sap power from their father and rule over a planet drenched in sin and chaos. Nicky is sent to capture them and cram them into a flask, and with the help of a demon pug mentor, two metalhead fanboys, an ambiguously gay roommate, and a pretty love interest, he just might have a chance.

This movie is positively bloated with talent and celebrity cameos. Reese Witherspoon and Harvey Keitel play Nicky’s parents, his brothers are both famous actors, Rodeny Dangerfield is grandpa Lucifer (and even in Hell he gets no respect), Jon Lovitz has a cameo as a peeping tom who gets sent to Hell early on, and best of all is Quentin Tarantino of all people in a reoccurring role as a blind street preacher. Then we have some amusing celebrity guest appearances like Henry “The Fonz” Winkler and, best of all, The Prince of Darkness himself Ozzy Osbourne in a plot-critical role towards the film’s end. You heard that right. An Adam Sandler film gave Ozzy a more dignified and awesome cameo than Ghostbusters: Answer the Call. Also Clint Howard is here as a nipple-rubbing crossdresser, just in case this movie’s cast wasn’t batshit enough for you.

Nicky himself is actually a pretty decent character as far as Adam Sandler protagonists go, though even I’ll admit that as easy as it is to imitate Nicky’s voice so that you can annoy your friends and family, it is a pretty annoying voice to listen to at times. The rest of the characters are decent enough. Most everyone is here just to participate in gags or to help Nicky in his journey, and they all serve their roles well enough, though out of Nicky’s friends I don’t think there are really any standouts compared to his evil brothers or the supporting cast in Hell and heaven.

Of course, this film’s greatest strength lies in just how insanely quotable the whole thing is. Practically every other line is memetically quotable, to the point this film has its own page for memes on TVTropes, something even some bigger and better movies can’t even boast. Chances are you’ll come out of this film with a few new lines to slip into every day conversation and jokes to use with friends. Perhaps you’ll even come out with a desire to eat some Popeye’s chicken, seeing as it is the shiznit.

Now, obviously this movie has flaws… like, seriously, this is an Adam Sandler movie, if I wanted to pick apart how utterly stupid, nonsensical, dumb, and juvenile chunks of this movie are, we’d be here all night. One of the more noticeable problems is the usage of music; in the course of one single scene, they play four different songs, and all of this is in a span of about one or two minutes. Just pick a song and stick to it for fuck’s sake! Then we have the strangely brief snippet of “Rock You Like a Hurricane” that plays as Nicky and his newfound demon pals carry a giant bucket of chicken so that he can confront his brother. It’s such a brief snippet, it’s almost like someone just let their ringtone go off and they kept it on the soundtrack.

There’s a reason this film is a cult classic and not one of the more mainstream Adam Sandler movies, and it’s because it is a weird, wacky, fantasy/comedy film. You’re really getting exactly what you expect here. If you want to see Hitler in a French maid outfit get a pineapple shoved up his ass, Henry Winkler get covered in bees, and a demon change a man’s Coke into a Pepsi as his big test of his wicked transmutation powers, then this film will do you good, but if you don’t think you can handle the absurdity described, it’s understandable if you’d rather sit this one out. Adam Sandler movies aren’t for everyone, and this film ain’t your typical Adam Sandler fare to begin with. Still, I think it has its place, and I personally find it to be an amusingly stupid and stupidly amusing bit of Sandler cinema. It’s not so much so bad it’s good as it is “so batshit crazy it’s pretty funny,” but either way it’s enjoyable if you’re in the right mood for some cheap goofy laughs.

If nothing else, this film is the reason I tried Popeye’s chicken for the first time. If you’ve never heard it, I can confirm – it’s fucking awesome.

#Michael After Midnight #review #movie review #Little Nicky #Adam Sandler #comedy #cult classic