i haven't really been *secretly* fattening you up...you just never noticed. all i did was kept your favorite foods at a lazy arm's reach, served your plate with double portions (and triple the butter) to my own, and kept you happy and secure. only subconsciously did you notice how my hand lingers on your lower stomach and only absent-mindedly did you realize your gut had started hanging out from under your old t-shirts. i didn't put the food in your mouth, you did. i didn't ask for thirds, you did. i didn't outgrow my widest pair of sweatpants, but you sure did. what i did do was infuse your life with love and cuddles and of course delicious food, which made your comfortable and self-confident and heavier than ever before. 馃挅
Sometimes the devil feeder vibes do be vibing. Like oh yeah I'll find out what your absolute faves are, master them, then surreptitiously add more and more into your daily routine so you both don't resist and get positive reinforcement from the constant deliciousness. Oh, you're gaining weight? Hmmmm. Wonder why.