#except when i’d find a fun new gbc game to hyperfixate on

[dagasinfilo]

boreded again

#learning to pinpoint when and how being bored will make me spiral and why and how to analyze my thought processes to prevent that has been #soooooo useful #lifesaving id say even #problem is i feel like when i was a child again #‘i’m bored but i don’t know what to do and i don’t know why’ is something i said so so so frequently as a kid #and now that i’m remembering most of my childhood (when i wasn’t just simply Having A Bad Time) was spent just either frantically looking #for ways to unbore myself or just. sitting. or laying down stare and think #except when i’d find a fun new gbc game to hyperfixate on #and then when i started drawing #which was more or less when i started Being On The Internet more #so it kinda makes sense that after that i gained enough structure and more or less constant stimulation for my symptoms to not show so much #cause that was also more or less when i started middle school #middle and high school was enough of a breeze for it to not be obvious that i was struggling #like. not being able to study or do homework most of the time is not a problem when you don’t need to do that to pass classes i guess lmao #i guess that was a big factor on why i dropped out of college also #and now that i think about it i lit stopped once the theoretical (? that what they’re called?) classes became demanding enough #(so like demanding that i actually sit down and study regularly rather than sporadic sessions that were mostly skimming and wandering)