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#erebus wants to fistfight the leash in a dennys parking lot and leave it for dead
brutal-nemesis · 3 years
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E&T: Here We Go Again
Guess who’s back, baby!!!
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Ingredients: hella noncon touching (unsexy), dehumanization/objectification, “it” as a forced pronoun
I am a person. A human being. I have very normal arms and legs that are the same bronze color as the rest of me. My nails are all...nail colored. Clear? They’re not black. Because I’m a person. Erebus. I’m not...not a prince anymore, but I’m still me. Even if my eyes are white and my teeth are sharp and my tongue is black, I’m still a human inside. Not a monster.
Hesitantly, Erebus opened his eyes and looked down at his right arm. For the first time in over a month, it actually looked normal, and although something was still definitely off about it, he was more than happy with this for now. As long as he believed the person he was inside was still human, his arm wouldn’t look like it had been dipped in blood, which was something. When Neteri came in, he held it up excitedly.
“Neteri, look, I got it to change!”
She smiled broadly and clapped her hands together. “That’s wonderful, Erebus! Let me see.” She came over and gently took his arm, examining it all over, splaying out his fingers and looking at his nails, rubbing his skin, and rolling up his sleeve to expose the gnarled scar below his shoulder from the amputation. It was less jarring to look at now that his flesh wasn’t changing color around it. “Good, good,” she muttered to herself before looking back at him. “How did you do it?”
“I just, uh...thought about how...how I’m not a monster.”
Neteri smiled at him warmly. “That’s right, you’re not!” She petted the top of his head, and he resisted the urge to lean into it. “And the fact that you’re a person will be especially important for you to remember today.”
“Uh...why?”
Neteri nervously rubbed her hands together. “So...remember how I said I’d have to let Hjáll look at you again at some point in the future?”
“Is it some point in the future now?”
“Yeah. Like right now.” She pulled the leash out of her bag, and he leaned away from her. “Come on, Erebus. I’ll be right there with you the whole time, and I won’t let her do anything awful. It’ll just be...a lot of touching. But not everywhere. Just where I’ve done things to you. So you’ve already been touched there before, at least by me, though I guess-” 
“Shut up, Neteri, I’ll go.” He sighed in defeat and got up, letting her attach the infernal thing to his neck once again. 
Erebus tried as best he could to calm his nerves as they walked along. He wasn’t exactly excited about seeing Hjáll again, even though he knew it wouldn’t be nearly as bad as last time. He wouldn’t be alone with that woman since Neteri would be there to supervise, and he figured she wouldn’t let Hjáll hurt him, either. But he still really didn’t want her to touch him all over or talk about him like he was some sort of...beast, and that was going to happen no matter what. Hopefully...hopefully he wouldn’t be forced to wear that awful muzzle again, at the very least.
They arrived at a door, and once Neteri ushered him in, he froze at the sight of the room beyond. It was bare save for two posts with manacles dangling from them and a chain with a hook attached to it hanging from the ceiling. He’d figured he was going to be restrained for this, but he’d thought it would be a chair or the table or something where he’d be less...exposed. Still, he let Neteri lead him to stand between the posts, watching a moment as she swatted at the small hook hanging from the ceiling, still unable to reach it even on her tiptoes. Sighing, he reached up and grabbed it with ease. “What do you want with this?” She smiled and hesitantly held up the leash.
“Um, well, if you could just...attach this to that...no, not the end, do it so it’s, uh, tight-not too tight, I don’t want you to choke yourself, just so it’s hard for you to move...yeah. Wait, shoot.”
“What?”
“Could you, uh, take your shirt off?”
“Do I have t-”
“Yes.” Erebus sighed, reaching up to unhook the leash, but he stopped midway and just unclipped it from the front of his collar. After pulling his shirt off, he simply crossed his arms and looked down at Neteri, careful not to look at his chest. He was not putting the leash back on himself. She rolled her eyes and reattached it before gently taking his wrists and pulling them out to either side, chaining them to the pillars he was standing in between. He resisted the urge to squirm, clenching his fists as she secured his ankles as well. He felt so exposed like this, but he was completely helpless to cover any part of himself.
While waiting for Hjáll to show up, Neteri ducked under his arm and stood behind him, no doubt looking at his scarred back. Erebus shuddered as she traced a finger down his spine, but if she noticed his discomfort, she paid it no mind. He looked back at her as best he could with his collar and the chain attached to it in the way. “What...what are you doing?”
“Just...looking,” Neteri hummed, her fingers still tracing along lightly. “Your next procedure will be on your back.” He gulped, wondering if she was going to mess with his spine given how much attention she was paying it. 
“What are you going to-”
“It’s a secret.” 
“Of course it is,” he sighed, and Neteri laughed lightly in response. Her touch moved from his spine to the whip scars crisscrossing his back. He’d always tried not to dwell on them, and he’d honestly only really looked at them once, towards the beginning of his time here. There were a lot of things he wanted to forget about that day, and being whipped was one of them.
“I’m sorry I didn’t stop them sooner,” Neteri blurted. “Not that you should’ve been whipped at all, but the Emperor wanted you to be…” He felt her hand clench into a fist against his back. “To be honest, I mostly stopped them because...because I wanted you, and I didn’t want them to hurt you more than I could fix easily. Because they were damaging something that might be mine. But I shouldn't've-”
Neteri was cut off by the door opening and Hjáll walking in, who immediately regarded Erebus with suspicion. “I thought I told you to put a muzzle on it, Neteri.” Neteri, who had come back in front of Erebus, simply crossed her arms.
“And I told you that two of the procedures were inside of his mouth, so I don’t know how you’d be able to conduct a proper examination if you couldn’t see half of what I’ve done. Besides, he can’t bite you unless you put your hands near his mouth. Not that he’ll bite you at all,” she looked up at Erebus, eyes narrowed, “right, Erebus?”
He rolled his eyes, not that either of them could tell since he didn’t have pupils anymore. “Yeah, I won’t bite.” He honestly had been considering biting Hjáll if she put her hand in his mouth, but he’d play nice since Neteri asked and would therefore probably punish him if he disobeyed. She might also just laugh about it after, but he didn’t want to risk making his situation any worse.
“See? He’s a good boy. So, let’s get started.” Neteri pulled on her gloves. “I’m sure you’ve noticed his fangs by now.” She reached up into his mouth, her finger pressing against the back of one of them. “I went with relatively short ones so they wouldn’t affect his speech and salivation too greatly, but they’re still quite sharp.”
“They’re the pride component, are they not?” Hjáll asked as she tentatively reached her own gloved finger into his mouth. Erebus opened wider and looked firmly at the corner, already very much not enjoying this. And he was certain the objectification was only just beginning.
After they finished talking about his teeth, they moved to his tongue. Neteri gently pulled it out of his mouth, something that never failed to give him flashbacks to when she’d cut off his human one. She seemed to be able to tell, giving him a reassuring pat before beginning to speak. “This was the first procedure I did, and it’s the gluttony component.”
“Huh. The shape’s so different that I can really only tell that from the color. Oh, I suppose it has the ridges as well.”
“Yeah, I had to modify the shape a bit before putting it in. I wanted him to be able to speak without much issue.”
“I still don’t understand why you want it to talk.”
“Erebus is very helpful!” Neteri let go of his tongue, and he quickly pulled it back in and shut his mouth, deciding to just not get involved in this particular conversation. “He tells me a lot of things I wouldn’t have been able to pick up on through observation alone. Thanks to him, I have a really good understanding on how all the procedures have affected him and how the demon components operate. Besides,” she smiled up at him, “I like talkin’ to him.”
Hjáll raised an eyebrow. “I hope this...attachment to your subject isn’t interfering with your work, Neteri.”
“It isn’t! Everything has proceeded as planned so far, and you know I’m good at putting aside my personal feelings”
“Still...this is why I recommend you just break it. It will make this all that much easier for you. If you’d just put it in my care for a few weeks,” she grabbed Erebus’s chin, looking him right in the eye, “I’d shatter it into perfect, empty compliance. No personality left to get attached to.”
“If I wanted him broken and compliant I already would have done it,” Neteri said coldly as she swatted Hjáll’s hand away from Erebus. “And I have plans in place in case he gives me reason to change my mind.” Erebus shuddered at that, gripping the chains tightly in his fists. What...what would Neteri do to him if she wanted to...to break him? He’d seen that same look in her eyes when she’d threatened to vivisect him if he tried to run, so he could only imagine what other awful things like that she might do to him...it made him more determined than ever to just suck up what little pride he had left and behave.
They moved to his eyes next, both of them now touching his face far too much for his comfort. He resumed staring at the corner, trying very hard not to focus on how close Hjáll’s face was to his since she wasn’t that much shorter than him. 
“He’s immune to visually activated petrification now, and he can see pretty well in the dark and underwater, despite the modifications I made to adjust them for surface conditions. It’s likely he can’t see in the dark as well as he’d be able to if I hadn’t done that, but that’s not really a big deal. You can’t really tell where he’s looking, though, watch. Look at me, Erebus.” He did so, and she nodded. “If he did it, I can’t tell. Look at Hjáll now.” Begrudgingly, he complied. Her thin eyes were a piercing green, and he would’ve found them rather pretty if they belonged to anyone but her. She smiled.
“I can tell it’s looking at me from how red its face is getting. So shy,” she crooned, trailing a finger down his bare chest. The chains held him in place, rendering him powerless to swat her away or even step back, so he just glared at her, trying his best to hide his discomfort. She chuckled, her touch moving to his right arm. “I see progress has been made with this arm. It was still red last time I examined your subject.”
“Yes, that was actually a pretty recent breakthrough! We discovered it’s related to how he perceives himself, but we’ll need to work with it further to fully understand how it operates.” Hjáll narrowed her eyes as she examined his now human-looking arm.
“So you’re saying it perceives itself as human?”
Neteri’s gazes hardened. “Yes, Hjáll, Erebus is a human being. Unlike you, I don’t experiment with my subject’s souls.” She sighed. “Are you satisfied with your examination?”
“I suppose. I did enjoy the chance to get a good look at it without all the...problems it posed last time.” She leaned towards him, placing a hand on his chest again. “Though I must say, it’d be so much more fun to have your little monster all to myself.”
“Erebus is not a monster, and he is mine,” Neteri growled, worming her way between him and Hjáll. “He always will be.” He felt his stomach drop at that; Neteri’s extreme possessiveness of him was one thing he could never get used to.
“Maybe someday you’ll change your mind. Until next time, then.” Both of them visibly relaxed once she was gone. Neteri started freeing Erebus from the restraints, giving him a concerned look.
“You okay? You were kinda quiet.”
“I’m...I’m fine. I just...didn’t have anything I really wanted to say. Anything that wouldn’t have made her slap me again, anyway.” He rubbed his sore wrists as she crouched to free his ankles.
“Did she slap you the first time?”
“Yeah. For ‘talking back’.”
“Oh, sun forbid test subjects be people.” Erebus opened his mouth to object, but then closed it. He, Neteri, and Hjáll all had very different opinions on that statement, and all of them were set in their beliefs enough that there wasn’t much use arguing. It was sort of funny that he and Hjáll both disagreed with that particular sentence, but for wildly different reasons. And while they were still in the subject of her...
“Neteri...is there any, um...is there any way Hjáll could…could actually...get me?” She finished unchaining his ankles and stood, looking up at him as she slowly shook her head.
“I don’t think so. You’re legally my property, despite…” she ran her finger down the center of his brand. “I can’t think of why she’d have any claim to you. I suppose possession of you would revert to the state if something were to happen to me, but that doesn’t necessarily mean you’d become hers. But don’t worry,” she cupped his cheek in her hand, “I’m not going anywhere anytime soon. And while I’m still here, I promise I’ll never hand you over to her. Unless you wanted me to for some bizarre reason.”
He shook his head. “I’d sooner ask for you to parade me around the streets of Nathar on the leash. But...thanks.” She nodded, and after he’d gotten his shirt back on, they returned to his cell.
“Now, I’ve got one more thing on the agenda for you today,” Neteri muttered as she dug around in her bag. Erebus watched her warily, hoping it wasn’t anything painful. “Are you going to sit still for this?” she asked as she pulled out a pair of shears. The same shears that she’d used to... Erebus flinched, his hands instinctively moving to cover his mouth.
“Um, you’re not-”
“No, no, not your tongue, silly. Your hair’s just gotten long.” Erebus lowered his arms, momentary panic starting to subside. His hair. Right. She had mentioned something about it the other day. He ran a hand through it.
“Oh. I mean, it really...hasn’t. Do I have to keep it short?” 
Neteri nodded. “Long hair gets in the way, especially with some of the stuff I have planned.”
“Stuff like what?”
“Stuff...involving the back of your neck. And the sides of your head.”
“The sides of my…” he clamped his hands on either side of his head, right above his ears. “Are you going to give me horns?!” Neteri smiled suspiciously and shrugged.
“Perhaps.” His hands twisted in his hair as a low whine emitted from his throat. “You’ll be fine, Erebus, I can get rid of them once the experiment is over. They won’t be that big. And you can grow your hair out again when this is over if you want to, I don’t really care. So come on, are you gonna let me cut it?”
He sighed. “Fine.” She had him sit in one of the chairs, and he clenched his fists in his lap as she threw a towel over his shoulders. At least he wasn’t tied up this time.
Neteri’s hand slid under his chin, gently tilting it up until he was staring straight ahead instead of at the floor. “Keep your chin up for me, okay?” She ran her hand through his hair, humming slightly. “Mmm, it’s always so silky.”
Erebus wished something as simple as having his hair cut didn’t bring him close to tears. But the last time this happened, the last time she did this to him...it had been one of the worst days of his life. And it was just another reminder that he wasn’t in control of his body at all. He bit his lip as he watched the little black clippings flutter to the ground, careful not to tilt his head. Actually...maybe this was for the best. Prince Erebus had been beautiful, with blue eyes and long hair and a smile that wouldn’t make people scream and run. But that wasn’t who he was anymore. The body he had now, the monster, had empty white eyes and horrific scars and fangs and eventually horns and that was him now, that was who he was, so maybe having short hair would help him remember that, to keep them separate.
“Okay, perfect.” Neteri ruffled his hair before coming around in front of him, tilting his chin to admire her work. “Yeah, you look super cute! Or cool or whatever you want to be. It suits you.” 
“Thanks,” Erebus muttered as he got up to go look for himself while Neteri cleaned up. She’d cut it short, shorter than she had the first time, especially in the sides and back, but he understood why. And he supposed it did look good, even if he didn’t look like his old self one bit, but, honestly...that was okay. It made it easier for him to believe that that was someone else, just a nameless monster staring back at him with those blank white eyes. Prin-no, he was never going to be that again, ever Erebus was just going away for a while, but he’d see his own face again someday. But for now, he’d inhabit the body of the monster.
And until he was actually himself again, until he looked as human as he was inside because he was human, he was, he was okay with keeping his hair short.
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