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confringo- · 5 years

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2019 Goals

Am I supposed to be writing right now and instead procrastinating by penning a blog under the guise of “lubing up” my writing chops so I can be ready to write what I need to write today?

Little Mix voice: Hell Yeah I Am!

(Dances to Joan of Arc for three times.)

Anyway, here are my goals for this year and they’re way more than I thought they would be, so I categorized them:

Health Goals

1. Lose 10 inches from my waistline by the end of the year.

5 inches by June

5 inches by December

I went buckwild with the whole “goals need to be SMART - Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant, Time-Bound” thing. I’m not remotely fucking around this year. I’ve deleted my Tinder and Grindr. Literally no Fucking Around. Also, got no time for men.

This is definitely something I’m gonna struggle with. I’m already not exercising and I’m losing days, but there is still the next day and the next day. Can’t be losing all those inches within a week. That would be unhealthy and I’m not about that. I’m not gonna lose weight just for the sole purpose of being pretty or so I can fit in my fucking clothes. I’m turning 25 this year. I don’t want to grow up regretting all the shitty food I’ve been eating and then paying for it in medical bills. No sir. I will not be a miserable old fuck who can’t walk around or climb stairs. I wanna be a miserable old fuck who CAN.

I can already feel my hypertension acting up again and I’d rather not freak my mom out about it. I need to lose weight, and that’s not just society talking.

2. Learn to cool 6 vegan meals (not snacks)

Again, I’m doing this thing where I need to be healthy. Also, I need to do this thing where I learn some actual domestic skills because growing up all comfortable with maids is not helpful anymore. I need to shape up and get some adult points. Can’t be level 5 adult forever.

This means I need to learn 1 meal per two months. It’s not that fucking hard @ self.

3. Clean room while listening to a new Night Vale episode.

The one sure way to know how deep I am in my depression is the state of my room. The state of my room also sends me into this self-destructive spiral of hate and lethargy. As it get dirtier, I get dirtier on the inside. Clutter begets clutter. Therefore, I will force myself to clean and declutter bi-monthly (eyyy 20biteen!!!)

This will not cure me of the Sads but at least a clean room is something less to stress about. Unfuck The Year!

Writing Goals

I’m dreading this already.

1. Finish HSHL (His Smile, His Laugh) by June 30th, 11:59PM

Wanna hear something funny? I was meant to finish writing my outline on December 31st. Right now, I’m procrastinating from finishing it. LMAO ROFL. FUck Me. But hey, I made it a goal to finish it within the week and I’m on what I like to call “Act V” of the outline so I just need to focus. I’m not doing that now but I sincerely hope that by finishing this blog I’ll be all “lubed up” for it.

2. Submit draft to AT LEAST 25 agents starting July 15th.

Gotta do that break yo. One teacher at my grad school residency talked to us about SMART goals and this was one of them. Submit the draft, sure. But aim for something. 25 agents is a good number. I’ll do more if I have to. We did a project on finding agents too so I can’t say I’m wholly unprepared.

3. Submit 3 stories to 10 journals/magazines

Listen. I don’t want to have to play the game but Capitalism Makes Moral Compromisers of Us All. That said, I started a writing twitter where I will be “networking,” something I’ve been dreading since I started grad school. Nevertheless, it’s a necessary evil. We are social creatures. Until such time I have fuck you money, I’m gonna have to do this. But also, I do genuinely want to support other writers. We’re all humans and I wanna do this thing where I tell writers about how much I love their writing. It will make me feel good that they feel good. Also, that’s good karma.

But anyway, this is also a good way to stretch my writing muscles. Avoid burnout. Keep things going. Plus, it’s a good way of practicing how to be thrifty with words since most of these things require a Word Count Limit. As you know, and as you can see, I don’t know when to shut up.

4. Finish “Julian’s Body” by February 28, 11:59PM

Guess who’s still writing Dalton fanfiction in 2019. This person! I’m like a few chapters away to the end. Might as well get it out of the way so that I stop feeling bad about it.

5. Finish “Forgive My Weakness” by January 31, 11:59PM

Another fanfic to finish. The fanfic I’m procrastinating on Today. I’m almost kinda done. This shouldn’t take another week. I hope.

6. Read at least one book/full lit mag/journal per month.

Again, an easy in theory goal. I’m reading Three Dark Crowns right now and I’m loving it but I’m also not reading it so...fuck. However, this is something I should stick to because I just finished reading Autoboyography by Christina Lauren and it gave me all those nice writing feels. Reading fuels writing and it’s easy to forget.

Work Goals

I’m quitting my current job in April. It’s no longer the right fit for me. I don’t want to get into great detail about these but I just want what’s best for my account before I leave it.

1. Set up QA team by April 1st, 12:00PM

2. Set up monthly incentive program by April 1st, 12:00PM

3. Set up phone rep incentive by April 1st, 12:00PM

4. Do minimum 4 writing workshops at Spark

This city does not need a Creative Writing teacher so I need to make do with what I have. There’s this cafe that allows people to do drawing/calligraphy workshops. My friend said that I could do writing workshops as well so this is the plan for 2019. I won’t have a stable job, I fear. I hope I get something to push through but if all else fails, I’m gonna fight tooth and nail to get a teaching career going, even if it’s all super amateur.

Money Goals

1. Get new debit card from BPI by March 17th, 12:00PM

Since I’m quitting my job, I’m also going to be losing my debit card so I need to set a new one up before I do so. Then this means I have to change my Amazon, my PayPal, my Spotify, and my Patreon and that’s gonna be sooooo annoying.

2. Pay mom back for treadmill by end of year.

I still owe her a lot of money and if I want to be rid of my guilt, I will have to finish paying her.

That’s pretty much it. There are of course some resolutions I still have like talking to my friends more and helping my sister out with her current situation with our mom. (Not fun, super dumb, why she too christian for her own good.) But I didn’t put them in as goals because I haven’t figured out how to word them in such a way. Resolutions are tough to follow through because of the wording. Still, I want to improve my personal life but that’s going to be up to me. These are the most important goals I want to hit and I’m gonna get through them, sweat and tears and blood and all.

I’m afraid.

I’m unprepared.

I’m procrastinating.

But you know what? I’m capable.

#Joey's diary #Goals

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