#do you ever think abt how hard 'what good is ambition if I can't even save the life of my own captain?' is gonna hit | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

sammonroe · 2 years

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I'm kinda shy to send an ask off anon so hi! Ridiculously long ask discussing some heavy topics ahead! I'm sorry in advance for all this, you can ignore this😭

People were quick to judge Scott (and August whose nickname I'm not sure how to spell bc English is not my first language) for his behaviour regarding his relationship with Shel and all I wanna say to them is: one, he's a fucking kid and two, how do you expect him to know wtf he's doing??? How can any logical human being expect ANY of these characters to act "right" when they're going to Horizon, which is a boarding school for TROUBLED teens????? They usually wanna twist the boys' characters too which bothers me a lot because. You can be annoyed w how they handle things!! So long as you realize and acknowledge that they don't really know better or can't do better because y'know. Horrible trauma. I for example didn't like how Juliette acted towards August or how Daisy acted towards Ezra in the last episodes. But like. I won't demonize them. I wouldn't blame them for making such mistakes even if they didn't have years of trauma riding on their backs!! They're fucking 15-16!!! Not even in your 20's can you make ZERO mistakes in a [romantic] relationship!! What makes you think you'll be able to do it at 16??

We shouldn't even be called Scott apologists honestly. You can call him selfish and sure he might be but can you really blame him? One of the few good things that happened to him after his parents divorced and his sick step mother came to his life was his relationship with Shelby, no matter how rocky and problematic it may be. Of course he'd want to maintain it AND fulfill his ambitions or dreams of playing again and getting scouted! Everyone handles their trauma differently and just because Shel had a more logical (if not pessimistic) outlook doesn't mean it's the right outlook or the best outlook and that everyone should have it too.

And keep in mind, Scott hasn't even begun to work through all of his issues yet. He just started opening up about his abuse and what he went through at the hands of his step mother. How do people expect him to be the Perfect Boyfriend? Was his reaction (jealousy, disgust(?)) towards Shelby's past acceptable? Absolutely not, you should never judge someone based on their "body count" no matter the circumstances, but it makes sense for a kid like Scott to think that way given his background and his time (early 2000's) even though it's wrong. I appreciated how Scott was an asshole at times. It made him more real and believable.

And lastly, NONE of the Horizon kids (sans Kate and any of the older kids who are close to graduating in the appropriate amount of time for them individually, not like how Scott was taken by his dad when he had barely begun opening up abt his issues) are in any way ready for romantic relationships! Literally impossible! Realistically, very few of the romantic relationships if any at all would survive long-term. Especially if we're talking about a healthy relationship. Their friendships can last much much easier and I like to think that once they each got out of Horizon they kept in touch. But romantic relationships are more complicated especially when so many of those kids have had horrific experiences with sexual abuse.

Anyway, sorry for this mammoth of an ask. I just deeply resonate with so many of these kids, particularly Scott, Shel, Daisy and Ezra (hence why they're my absolute favourite characters from Higher Ground) and it really hurts me when people miss the entire point of the show so hard. I don't think I will ever recover emotionally from the show tbh.

So uuuh, happy new year!! And stay safe!! :"D

yo. I love keeping Higher Ground alive by having these discussions. you don’t have to be shy here. you can always drop by— anon or not— and talk to me about Scott.

but yeah, it’s a whole circus, honestly. it was a lot more controversial back in the day. a lot of people were annoyed/upset by Scott’s arrogance and apparent privilege throughout the season (Football Captain meets Prom Queen - esque), and a hell of a lot of people miss the point Higher Ground tries to make out of Scott’s character. you can come from any sort of background and still infinitely spiral (consequentially lose yourself to untreated/ unacknowledged trauma), even if you’re this attractive, popular athlete with a “supportive” father. broken kids don’t have to have a certain kind of “image” or “background”. broken kids come in all shapes and forms. I think Higher Ground portrays that well, even with its flaws.

Scott realistically doesn’t know how to cope with what happened to him. I mean, he spends most of the season blaming himself and feeling guilty— most of his guilt focused around how his dad would react if the truth ever came out. and I’ll quote Scott, the worst of it (for him) was how he’d felt he had “betrayed” his father (for being assaulted? Christ.) so, he blames himself for the assault. he feels guilty it happened (father ft. betrayal), and all of this is driven by the stigma that men cannot be sexually assaulted. plus, the show was made in the 2000’s, so the stigma (compared to nowadays) was way worse. he’s just WASN’T coping, because he wasn’t giving himself the liberation to understand that it wasn’t his fault, that men can face sexual assault, and that he has to go through the motions of what he went through. that he’s allowed to be angry. he’s allowed to be sad. he’s allowed to cry, and feel sorry for himself, but throughout the season he doesn’t really START to put one foot in front of the other until he confesses everything.

so he has a lot of unresolved feelings (that require treatment, honestly one-to-one therapy), and exhibits a clear criteria of C-PTSD. I won’t get into it, because diagnosing him isn’t the main point of this answer, but it can pretty much be broken down briefly here:

reliving the traumatic experience.

there’s a funky kind of soundtrack they use sometimes to highlight Scott’s “reliving” process, sometimes accompanied by flashbacks of Elaine. you see it in the first episode where he’s in the bathroom and he’s dissociating/ lashing out.

sometimes there’s a particular trigger for Scott (thunder, or Shelby’s attempts to seduce him), sometimes it’s triggered by his stress. either way, he relives his awful, countless experiences throughout the entire season.

destructive and/or risky behavior.

this one is obvious. he abused drugs to cope with what he’d gone through (risking a potential career in football and being expelled), attempted to run twice from Horizon which consisted of breaking into a random person’s house and searching it for drugs/alcohol, and risking his life trying to escape camp via kayak.

feelings of shame and guilt/negative self-perception.

already explained this above, he feels ashamed for what happened (what he thought he’d allowed to happen), and guilt (mostly for his father, this reoccurring theme of betrayal).

distorted perception of abuser.

so, this one’s an interesting one. Scott, at one point, believed he loved Elaine. he was alone with her most of the time (father constantly traveling because of work), and he felt lonely/ lost after his parents divorce. plus, he had to move schools— so new friends, new environment, etc. what he thought was reciprocated love was just plain abuse. when it all comes out, Scott later becomes preoccupied with getting revenge/ destroying her. understandably so.

I say interesting because I don’t know if anyone else caught this, but he explains to Shelby he wrote those love letters to Elaine because he thought he’d loved her at one point— but he tells his biological mother that he sent those letters because she made him write down what he couldn’t say to her, and twisted it so that it looked like Scott was willingly sending her letters. not sure if it was an error in writing, or if Scott isn’t completely telling the truth here.

these are only just some of the symptoms of C-PTSD the show explores, even though he exhibits a lot more of the criteria. again, people are quick to overlook his trauma because of the way he expresses it.

he can be cruel, say very cruel things, and has plenty of violent outbursts, but his trauma is in no way less valid than anyone else’s who expresses it differently, or more “clearly”. and I don’t condone his bad behavior. for example, the episode Passions, where he kisses Sophie without consent, or when he calls Shelby a “used car”, or when he was quick to judge her about her past with prostitution. they are behaviors I can understand, because I understand his character and the psychology of it, but understanding it doesn’t mean condoning it.

people are quick to forget that Scott overcomes his outdated/ ignorant beliefs. he apologizes to her and comes to understand where he went wrong. he accepts her. and it takes a lot for a kid like Scott, who’d had his pride taken from (especially in a society where masculinity is “everything” to a man), to realize he’s not always right, or that his beliefs are in the wrong side of the playground, let’s call it. kid’s beliefs are a reflection of their upbringing, and honestly? seeing the kind of piss-poor excuse of a man Scott’s dad was, I genuinely wasn’t surprised he came to Horizon with... strong beliefs. (also referring to the homophobia when partnered with Auggie for a project, but in the very same episode he comes to realize he’s, well, being a judgmental dick). so you can say whatever you want about Scott, entirely forgetting he’s an impressionable sixteen-year-old with NO concept of what a healthy relationship is— but that boy acknowledged his wrongs. he admitted to them. he fixed them, or tried to. and people fail to recognize that because... man, please enlighten me. because I can’t understand them. people like to jump on Scott’s wrongdoings and ignore that Shelby continuously harassed him for attention, continuously seduced him, while he was in a relationship— and then outside of it. but Scott’s the only one who can do wrong, apparently. because Shelby’s promiscuity is “understandable” by virtue of her trauma, but Scott’s anger isn’t? interesting. (and don’t get me wrong, I love Shelby. these are behaviors, like Scott’s, I understand but don’t condone). I’m just pointing out the hypocrisy of the ever-eroding community.

Scott comes from a popular background where most of his relationships are probably built on a superficial foundation (friends, girlfriends, etc). his dad “cares” about him to a certain degree (his son achieving greatness, it reflects WELL on the narcissistic prick), but most likely doesn’t go as far as to ever question his son’s well-being (he believes a woman he’s only known briefly over his own flesh and blood, it speaks volumes), his mother is living in an entirely different state with another man, and his step-mother is his abuser. no, Scott has no example of what a healthy relationship is, so none of his future relationships are going to be healthy unless he works on himself. his relationship with Shelby isn’t healthy, and shouldn’t be an example of a “healthy relationship”, so I agree with you. none of the kids should be having romantic relationships, which I believe it’s why it’s “forbidden” at Horizon, but kids are kids. they’ll still explore it. I just don’t think the audience should really... talk about who deserves who. they deserve therapy. they deserve strong, healthy bonds, and good friendships. I was really disappointed that Scott and Shelby didn’t stay as friends. (romance does give views, though). when he hugged Shelby for the first time, it made me really emotional as a kid. it was like a core memory for me. they share a great understanding... again, to a degree, but Shelby could’ve been his first real friend. would’ve been more powerful, but that’s just my opinion.

I’m sorry this got long. I sort of wanted to make an extension out of your question to address Scott in a more isolated way, but thanks for sending it in.

and a happy new year to you too. <3

#Scott Barringer #Higher Ground #I love questions about Hayden or any of his characters #I’m like #fucking Wikipedia #but for Hayden and his characters #and also 100% more accurate

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ocalaghan · 2 years

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can you not be done with those paramore asks now you reblogged it days ago

omg thank-you SO much for letting me know! here's every other question i haven't answered yet!

all we know: do you miss anyone right now? who? my bf bc he is studying abroad and tbh most of my besties cos i haven't seen them in a hot min !

pressure: is there anyone who puts a lot of expectations on you? my boss lmao

emergency: are you a determined person? to an extent? a bitch has adhd

brighter: is there anything in your life that has turned out in an unexpected way - for better or worse? getting together w pmore boy (for better!)

here we go again: have you written a letter recently? who was the last person you wrote to? i wrote a christmas card/letter for imogen last year, she lives all the way across the pond in florida

never let this go: what is your earliest memory? my papa making me tea with like 10 sugars in my baby bottle as a toddler and laying a cushion on the floor to watch lady & the tramp <3

whoa: name a song you’d love to hear live. so criminal ! i'm not sorry, pat kirch !

conspiracy: have you ever felt like someone is against you? uhhhh yes lmao

franklin: is there a place you consider home to you? where? here in scotland, but definitely my lil home village specifically even tho i wasn't born there

my heart: is there a person you want to spend the rest of your life with? ALL OF MY FRIENDS and my bf ig

careful: do you have a favourite instrument? piano is incredible to me

ignorance: is there anyone you used to be close to, but haven’t spoken to in a long time? a few people but one in particular came to mind there and it always stings a little. i wouldn't have survived without her for a while tho.

playing god: have you ever broken a bone? not broken, but i did fracture my butt which i think is kinda impressive

the only exception: do you believe in love that lasts forever? it can!

feeling sorry: which is worse to you: ending a friendship or a relationship? never had a really bad break-up so i can't vote from personal experience but i think they're probably as bad as each other in their own ways?

looking up: how dedicated are you to your ambitions? ehhhhhh don't make me feel bad abt myself at 1am lol

where the lines overlap: what is your opinion on long distance friendships/relationships? it can for sure work (once ur sure ur not being catfished lmao), just gotta be perisistent w it. i have long-distance friends that i've known for years!!

all i wanted: is there something that you almost didn’t do, but you’re glad you did? i almost didn't go on my first date w pmore boy, i wanted to cancel bc i couldn't be bothered and i was tired from work lmaoooo

fast in my car: do you have a dream car? if so, what is it? i honestly don't really, i just want a car in a cute colour. bimbo culture.

daydreaming: which do you prefer: night or day? day

ain’t it fun: is there a song you could play on repeat for days and never get tired of? idk why but the reimagined version of south drive by wstr? repeated 1 mil times on spotify every time it comes on

part ii: is there a part of your past you hold particularly dear? honestly i really enjoyed my school years and kinda wish i could relive them and cherish them more

last hope: do you believe more that you should reach for what you want or that what’s meant to be will be? bit of both? bit of both.

anklebiters: which is more important to you: doing what others want you to do or doing what you want to do? the second one obv but it's hard for us self-conscious hoes x

proof: who do you trust the most? pmore boy forevz

hate to see your heart break: do you believe that the future holds good things? i'd like to.

(one of those) crazy girls: as a person, how laid back are you? pretty laid back. i mean i have anxiety and i'm pretty neurotic lmaoooo but outside of that, not a lot really bothers me? i'm forgiving etc u kno.

be alone: are you more of a talkative or quiet person? depends who i'm with! i've always been thought of as a quiet person but i don't shut up around my loved ones lol.

future: what do you think/hope your future holds? happiness. <333 suck my dick sir x

paramore asks for anyone else who wants to rb

#i had a GREAT TIME

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