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#creo que no. me pone mal Malvinas todavia soy como león gieco literal
the-acid-pear
·
11 months
Text
Mentioned my little brother mentioned my mother mentioned my ptsd diagnosis and I got so stressed my eyes started burning and I had to take a pill LMAO
#luly talks
#pastera salio el blogger 🫢 oopsie x3
#hey hay peores. una pasta garpa más que un pucho o un trago.
#soy lo suficientemente caradura para hacer un chiste sobre Malvinas y mi estres postraumático?
#creo que no. me pone mal Malvinas todavia soy como león gieco literal
#saben que me crié con ese tipo? todavia recuerdo el video de uhh
#hora de una historia actually. when i was a kid my mother had her pc my dad's pc my pc and it was the 2000s so she has music downloaded
#and other than being obsessed w the black eyed peas there was this video of leon gieco solo le pido a Dios
#and there was this powerpoint sad photo slide and i remember this one pic of a little african kid bc it FREAKED THE SHIT OUT OF ME
#bc it was just a little kid a little toddler who was starving i insist this was the 2000s but i for some reason thought the kid was like.
#covered in needles? and i mean maybe they were. but i think i just... imagined it
#the hallucinations and the intrusive thoughts aren't something i started experiencing as an adult LMAO
#esp for the intrusive thoughts.
#i think i just didn't realize their hair was just Like That and that's why i thought it was needles and i remember telling my mom as i
#looked away scared like it was the msot fucked up shit ever bc to me it was and she was like ah yeah those are the kids [word i forgot] :/
#and the fact that she didn't correct me or comfort me just eternally haunts me
#i mean it definitely wont anymore now that i shared it but it always haunted me
#never understood why but i think its that. i think its her lack of reaction towards me
#mind you i was no older than 5-6. and she didnt even comfort me. or explain it.
#which is the approach she always had towards me
#which also explains why i never trusted anyone with my intrusive thoughts or hallucinations or similar
#well i did as a teen when i said flashie that literally means Hallucinated but in a drug context (so a more casual one)
#and even then i was like turned down like it wasn't possible
#even know when i was telling my dad about my ptsd he was like well i cannot disprove what you feel but the diagnosis is subjective
#and w my mother i was desperate to go to doctors and get diagnosis(-is/es?) bc i needed someone to listen to me
#it is a hopeless existence i carry
#and yet. i fish.
#brain stuff
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