#crack. Par Vollen delenda est.

[archontem]

Radonis only fucks people who are willing to assassinate someone, and only loves people who are willing to assassinate him.

edit to say that ALL QUNARI ARE EXCLUDED YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE

EDIT 2, IF RADONIS WANTS TO ASSASSINATE YOU, THEN YOU DON’T COUNT

#ooc. #crack. Par Vollen delenda est. #[this is crack but also... you kno #anyway it's not even valentine day any longer here #so why am I posting this now? #because I forgot it was valentine day y'all]

[archontem]

[kinkshames in fereldan]

you have no ground to stand on

#answered. #crack. Par Vollen delenda est. #hopewrought

[archontem]

Wait am I excluded on Qunari basis or assassination basis I have to know.

absolutely both

overlapping

not mutually exclusive

#answered. #crack. Par Vollen delenda est. #beefcakequnari

[archontem]

I’m here to be wooed

#beefcakequnari #answered. #crack. Par Vollen delenda est.

[archontem]

@thearchdemon things are taking a turn for the worrisome

#ooc. #crack. Par Vollen delenda est. #thearchdemon

[archontem]

What about those of us who might decide to get a bunch of magisters together to overthrow you? -bats eyelashes at-

that falls under “people he might want to assassinate”. doesn’t count.

that post already needs too many clauses I can’t believe

#ooc. #crack. Par Vollen delenda est. #[I can't BELIEVE] #lucernimaevaris

[archontem]

@beefcakequnari @afirmbelieverinnopantsfridays

I am away for one (1) day

#crack. Par Vollen delenda est. #beefcakequnari #afirmbelieverinnopantsfridays

[archontem]

@banalvhen

Am i to presume this means in tevinter they have somebody stationed in the elevators playing the flute or something

once two magisters were arguing over who had the best elevator in their estate. This historic dispute ended when one of them hired a full orchestra and tried to fit it in a 4x4m space. It’s canon, World of Thedas confirmed

@chevaliersreach

elevator music playing on the way to the bloodbath salon

*tururutururururutu

*dlin dlon

*door opens to ongoing blood sacrifice

“uhmmmm sorry guys don’t mind me wrong floor”

#chevaliersreach #banalvhen #crack. Par Vollen delenda est.

[archontem]

when we conquer tevinter be like

when the Qunari lose the Tome of Koslun because you commissioned the theft be like

#arishok #crack. Par Vollen delenda est. #[JKSDFKJDSFJDSJDSDF #WHY DID YOU PUT THIS IN MY INBOX #WHY DID YOU MAKE ME LOOK AT IT AGAIN #I'm dyin] #submission

[archontem]

@foppishdandy replied to your ask:

lies

does this mean we just found the one weirdo. do you wanna confess

@beefcakequnari replied to your ask:

Can we see under that hat to confirm?

first of all no and second of all I like that the only one you need confirmed is the hairline

#foppishdandy #beefcakequnari #[y'all] #crack. Par Vollen delenda est.

[archontem]

@thescorcher said:  he doesn't wanna be seen as boring lol

Radonis voice: what’s the hip new thing among young people in the Imperium now someone: uhhh they make political parties to bring ChangeTM and End Corruption Radonis: jeez can’t they just stick to alcohol and blood magic like everyone else

#thescorcher #crack. Par Vollen delenda est. #[I want you to know that I made the test for Feanor too #and I got DEEP PINK #which is actually more accurate than red judging from what you got yourself]

[archontem]

@divinitatem said: wtf tumblr. anyway... maybe he's that professor who teaches a subject either so esoteric or so tedious that no one ever signs up for it, thus obviating the need to actually ever teach it

Radonis voice: today I’ll teach you how to breed magical dracolisks. we’re going to practice with living samples. careful because the last student lost an arm.

#divinitatem #crack. Par Vollen delenda est.

[archontem]

Radonis: “I have a girlfriend”

holds up a cat

#crack. Par Vollen delenda est. #ooc. #[exam in... two days guys bear with me #this is what talking with cllgood does to me]

[archontem]

@frcgment

-stares in dragon-

stares back in tevene

#where did things go wrong #(don't answer that) #frcgment #crack. Par Vollen delenda est. #tbd.