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louisloulouie · 3 years

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Whoa I had my wisdom teeth removed today and it was such a journey I need to get it all out for myself. But I don’t care if someone reads this (in fact I love attention so read ahead if you wanna read this massive post). This is not a great story though, so if you’re going to get your wisdom teeth removed, maaaybe don’t read this. If someone reads this, warnings for panic attacks, blood, paranoia, needles, and other general medical things.

Anyways it really sucked because coming out of the anesthesia threw me into a panic attack. Luckily, I didn’t say anything I didn’t want to say, like accidentally coming out to my dad and brother which was my biggest fear and why I put off getting my wisdom teeth removed for 4 years. But the hyperventilating and paranoia and crying was still awful.

I should preface this by saying I have never had any type of operation or surgery or anything. My doctor’s checkups as a kid were always perfect. I’m 23 now and I stopping going to the doctor when I was 16 and I’ve never had anything other than a cold during spring allergy season. My dentist appointments are always good so I’ve never even had a cavity or needing a filling or anything. My gynecologist appointments take less than 5 minutes and I probably take longer getting undressed and dressed because the annual checkup takes so little time because I never have anything wrong with me.

I have never even been inside a hospital since I was born, not even to visit people because I’ve never had to visit anyone. So anyways, this made me insanely terrified of what could happen because I have never experienced it myself.

I woke up and I was immediately sound of mind, I remember everything I did and everything people told me, and all the conversations going on around me. However, that meant I immediately tried to remember what happened before they put me under with IV anesthesia and I could not remember a single thing after I saw the doctor put the needle in. This was the most uncomfortable thing I’ve felt, I did not like that I couldn’t remember falling asleep. Similarly, when I woke up I hated that I couldn’t remember the operation, which should be good cause that means no pain, but it still made me majorly uncomfortable that my memory just failed me.

In addition to that, something happened after I graduated high school in 2015, and idk what it was but right after my graduation, I started remembering every single dream I had. For 6 years straight, genuinely 365 days every year, I have woken up and remembered my dream/dreams no matter if it was from sleeping at night or having a nap or just dozing for 10 minutes. After waking up from the anesthesia, I could remember I did dream, but for the first time ever I did not remember what it was about. And that scared me. Remembering my dreams has been the MOST constant thing ever in my life, it has basically become as subconscious as breathing. I don’t think anything else in my life has lasted every day for six years. I don’t know if this counts as illogical, but I was absolutely terrified I couldn’t remember falling asleep, I couldn’t remember my dream, and I was surrounded by all these people I didn’t know.

So, they took me to a recovery bed and the second I lied down, I started hyperventilating hardcore. Each breath probably took less than half a second and I could not stop. At the same time, I started crying because I couldn’t remember things. Then I touched my face and omg why did I do that? I couldn’t feel my bottom lip or my tongue and that made me panic more. Time to hyperventilate some more and start sobbing. I refused to open my eyes so I just lied there unable to breathe well and crying my eyes out.

I also started feeling paranoid, but I don’t know what of. When I opened my eyes, I started looking everywhere around me to make sure I knew where everything was. I had my hands up to my neck and covering my chest like I was cowering away from someone, and I was shaking like a leaf the whole time. I was still completely with it in my mind though, I remember everything people were saying and my brain was not fuzzy at all. My eyes just absolutely could not stop moving, I had to be looking at everything at all time. The whole time I was wishing I had my doll with me to cuddle because the way I held my hands up, I really needed something to hold, and I have a doll my parents gave me on my first Christmas that I’ve relied on for everything.

Eventually my brother drove me home (still hyperventilating and crying and paranoid btw), but I was getting a little better. However, once I got in bed and finally got to cuddle my doll, I had to take my gauze out to take some painkillers. What a fucking mistake. I got blood on my doll that I drooled out. And it broke my heart. Onto sobbing again!! I was staring hardcore at my doll, pure tunnel vision on her only, and tried to rub off the blood, honestly I can only compare it to someone acting like they’re at a murder scene trying to hide evidence. I could not believe I got her dirty, and with blood of all things. It made my heart ache so fucking bad. It was the absolute worst feeling I’ve felt in ages. It’s been a while, I’ve calmed down 100%, but even now my chest still physically aches from getting her dirty.

This post completely does not even get across how badly I panicked and cried and sobbed and broke down. But it was bad, and I can’t believe this happened all because of wisdom teeth. This is probably one of the worst experiences of my life. And for something so normal and routine. Thank god my dentist recommended getting all 4 removed at once because I do not want to do that again.

#whoa this is a long post #but I don’t have a diary #and this is my blog so it’s basically like a diary #it’s all just for me to get out #no need to read #but I also 100% do not mind if people see this and react to it #before and after I also had nerves because of my vanity though #I’m so self conscious and I didn’t want to know what my face looked like after all swollen #so that added another layer of being terrified #(even though no one else is gonna see me except my family???? but whatever it still made me cry more when I thought about it afterward)

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roninkairi · 7 years

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GAME REVIEW: The Legend of Zelda- Breath of The Wild

I am kind of hard pressed in finding a good way to start off this review. I mean, I have spent the better half of the past 2 months exploring many of the various locales in Hyrule and trying very hard not to royally screw up, as well as devise ways to make rupees and gain better weapons, what series of sentences could I use to best sum up that kind of commitment to a game?

But then again, maybe I just did right now. I don’t think I could find a proper way to start off a good review without sounding either too fanboyish or pretentious. Also, to be quite fair, many of you who have been noticing certain pics I’ve put up on my Facebook and Tumblr accounts know I’m dedicated to this game. And with good reason, as it seriously is one of the best developed games ever produced for the Zelda series. Now this review is probably gonna take a bit of time for you to slog through, so pull up a chair and relax, this MAY take a while…

Initially made for the Wii-U (the one I will be reviewing here), Breath of the Wild is both the final game developed for the Wii-U and one of the launch games for the new Nintendo Switch. Graphically speaking, it seriously pushes the Wii-U, as you will see as you travel throughout the lands. From the plains of the Great Plateau and Central Hyrule, to the snowfields of the Hebra section and the vast deserts of the Wasteland, there isn’t one real ugly speck of dust out there. Well, maybe with the exception of any areas that is infected with the Malice goop, which I strongly suggest against touching. (Trust me, the stuff is like black slime in Ghostbusters—gets everywhere and is very hard to wash off…)

As the theme of the game is reliant on the nature aspect, it seems almost organic in tone. And many of the other areas that are populated seem to borrow from certain parts of history (the developers said that the inspiration for the art came from the Jomon period of Japanese history. A quick Google search confirmed my curiousity) or are unique in itself, like the Gerudo women and their insertion of their own words for welcoming people and describing men and women respectively. In a way, it’s an interesting approach and gives the world some more personality than you may be used to. It also helps because for the most part, the primary story is simple: Link wakes up after being asleep in the Resurrection Shrine for 100 years and finds out that Ganon, or Calamity Ganon, is about to break out of his prison within Hyrule Castle, so it’s your job to go and kill him (Oh and save Zelda while you’re at it.) The bulk of the plot details are told either through flashbacks, or memories, scattered throughout the game and through journals and interactions with many other NPCs. I can understand why some people may not like the lack of a proper structured story but to be fair, most of the people that Link knew before he was put into sleep are, for lack of a better term, dead. The only handful of people still alive that remember him or personally know Link are either super old or Zora. (They have a RIDICULOUS long life here in the game and it makes a certain side mission a little…ummm…ODD.) I think though that as you make the journey all the stuff you get to do for the people you meet help to keep some semblance of a moving plot. Yeah, the people are aware of a giant Eldritch abomination that is on the loose, but they are preoccupied with other things, like getting married, treasure hunts and getting a picture of a Lynel. (Oh yeah, Lynels…I will get to those fuckers soon enough…)

By now you are probably used to the standard ways that the previous Zelda games have started out, which is a lengthy tutorial section where you learn the ins and out of combat, how the controls work and so forth. Well, not this time. Nintendo really meant it when they said this would not be the standard Zelda game; You start off in the Resurrection Shrine, get the Sheikah Slate, some clothes and a quick briefing on running and climbing, and then…that’s it. You step outside, get a beautiful opening wide shot of the area below and that’s all there is, now go follow that mysterious old man who just noticed you and is walking down the path. You want a weapon? Go find it. The Great Plateau is basically your training ground and you will learn, the HARD WAY I should stress, the ins and outs of combat, when to pick a fight and when not to and just how important it is to horde food. And once you finally get off of the Great Plateau (which itself will take a good chunk of time) the real adventure kicks in.

One of the best things about the original game was the open world aspect, where you have free reign to go out and explore the landscape. This is made very evident here in this game as well. The game is MASSIVE. Seriously. Hyrule here is supposed to be much, much bigger than the world of Skyrim and I will have to take them at their word for it seeing as I’ve yet to play Skyrim. (Yes, shocking I know, give me a break already.) There’s no one way to approach your quest. You COULD, if you wanted to, go and try to take down Ganon right away. I can tell you, after seeing Hyrule Castle later in the game, going straight from The Great Plateau to Hyrule Castle is tantamount to actual suicide. I mean in THEORY you could do it but it would be very hard and you would need to, well, NOT GET HIT. EVER.

Which brings me to the next point: the combat system. It still retains the basic controls, where we have Z targeting and shielding. But there has been quite a few changes. Instead of just a one handed sword, Link can now wield spears, bigger swords, rods and various clubs, boomerangs, halbreds and…a mop. No really, you get to use mops too. But you have to be careful, as durability on various weapons factor in; You could be wailing on a bokoblin horde with a sweet broadsword and then—you get a warning that the weapon will soon break. You are forced to constantly scrounge for weapons, bows and shields as you play. It’s an interesting way to make sure you do not rely too heavily on one weapon AND have the right tool for the right battle, but I would be a liar if I said I didn’t see the disadvantages of this at crucial moments. However, there are a couple of new methods employed now for attack and defense; the flurry, which can be activated if you manage to pull off a perfect dodge and the perfect parry, instrumental in deflecting certain attacks. The latter is very useful in a pinch especially against Guardians. Plus, it’s a good way to reduce wear on the shield. As you play further and further in the game, these skills will become not only second nature, but essential.

The foes you will face are varied too. Each type have their own unique quirks and behaviors, plus they will learn to adapt to your own tactics. If you try to lay a bomb at a bokoblin horde, one of them may have enough insight to kick it back to you. A Moblin may pick up a bokoblin and throw it at you if it lacks a suitable weapon. And then there are Lynels…

Yeah those bastards.

I do not know precisely WHY they made these one of the toughest things to fight in the game. But they are for some godforsaken reason. The Lynels, Talus, Hynox and Molduga are some of the biggest and, at times, tougher fights waiting for you out in the field. They are risky but worth the rewards they reap when you do kill them. And given that the Blood Moon in this game revives all the guys that you kill off, you will not have a shortage of battles. But if, by any chance, a Blood Moon occurs right AFTER you fight a particularly tough battle, then you’re kind of screwed, especially if you are low on food or weapons. And that’s the beauty of the combat in this game, it is simple in theory but when you actually go out there almost anything can happen. The healing system has also undergone a significant change, as you need now to eat food and elixirs in order to regain health out in battle, as opposed to the old ways of getting hearts. And they actually went out of their way to make the cooking system fun to use. You will experiment with cooking to find not only the best recipes for healing, but for gaining serious strength or defense buffs when you need it the most. Trust me, you will NEED to stock any and all ‘mighty’ ingredients.

Also, as you start to play, you may die. A LOT. Enemies can hit hard so getting the best armor will also be a priority. In previous titles, armor only really slighty changed the damage you could receive but here it is a matter of life and death. Some armor sets have idden benefits that can make exploration and combat easier. It’s also required to survive in other regions. Ever wonder how Link manages to survive being in certain places like volcanos without serious heat damage? In this game, it now is a factor. Whether it’s snow capped mountains or desert landscapes, your choice of clothes and/or elixirs can make a difference. But when it rains it can REALLY slow you down. Lightning storms also really, REALLY suck until you get the Lightning Helm.

Another real huge departure now is the dungeon system, or rather lack of. The game has only 4 main “dungeons”, or Divine Beasts, to go through (and of course, Hyrule Castle) while everything ese is now placed into Shrines hidden throughout the game, which house the Spirit Orbs you need in order to gain Heart Containers or Stamina Wheel expansions, and also weapons and treasure. Some of the Shrines just require a simple puzzle, others require more devious means of entry or survival (fear Guardian Scout IV). And even with the Sheikah Sensor just finding them is a task in itself. (Yeah, lets not even discuss Eventide Island, because that may cause some people to have fits.) It’s an interesting deviation, although some may wish to have a go at a standard Zelda dungeon. That may actually be the best way to describe the final area, Hyrule Castle. It was the only one I felt that seemed more in tune with the traditional Zelda game structure (barring the lack of compass and boss key of course.) The Divine Beast area are an interesting new way to get around this, though.

Now the soundtrack is another area I wanted to go into deeper with. You know how there is always a prevalent theme in the main field as you travel? Well…it’s not here. I mean there is music in the game, but only in certain areas and instances. When it does happen, it can go from nice and quiet to awesome in a second. Unless, of course, you are dealing with a Guardian. One second, you will be in the field, walking around and then that single piano chord plays and OH FUCK WHERE IS THAT RED LIGHT COMING FROM?!!!

There are actually quite a few musical nods to previous games (Like the Death Mountain area) along with many, MANY references to past Zelda lore. Certain islands and regions, for example, are named after many characters. You can even, if you have the right Amiibo, get gear related to past LOZ titles, such as tunics, swords, bows and even Epona herself (and Wolf Link, if you bought Twilight Princess). The side quest and other numerous things you can do are also here to help you out and keep you busy. Want more weapons or shields? Go look for Koroks! They can be almost anywhere and getting their seeds helps you to expand your inventory. (I wouldn’t go out of my way to collect all 900 of them though. Yes, you read right, 900. Just stop at 400) You can also take pictures to fill up the Hyrule Compendium, shield surf down slopes, go horseback riding, tackle an obstacle course or two, ride a fucking bear into battle—

No I did not make an error there. You can ride many different animals aside from horses. You can ride deers, elks, a moose, an undead horse, the King of The Mountains and even a bear...while it's ON FIRE.

…lets face it, this is the LEAST badass thing you will do at this point. There ‘s a LOT to do in this game. You can take your time or you could speed through it, your choice. But yeah, I’d take my time to enjoy this.

If I had to gripe about anything, it’s just this; the boss battles may be a little underwhelming. It depends though; I mean if you have the Master Sword with you when you take on any of the bosses in the Divine Beasts and Hyrule Castle then yeah, it can be quick. (Especially if you also get Ancient Arrows to even the odds.) And the final battle…I rather not give away too much, but my only reason for getting through that is the fact that at that point in the game, I had experienced so many other types of fights that when it was time to face Ganon, I pretty much knew what the hell to do at the right time, plus I had the Master Sword and beat all of the Divine Beasts first. Also, as many have said, I think the story progression could have been done a little differently.

I wanna say that this is a complete assessment of everything this game has to offer, but it’s not as we have DLC coming later, which will add some new costumes, a Hard Mode (because apparently this game was taking it easy on us) and a new story that will be added in the fall. But from what I have played now, I can most definitely say this is one of the best games ever made, period. If you have a Wii-U this is a no brainer you get this game. If you have a Switch, yeah ditto, but make sure you charge up that bad boy because you will be playing this. A LOT.

#game review #the legend of zelda #breath of the wild #wii-u #nintendo switch

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